Never Wake

by: Liv-x-Case-Benson & dcmasters

Ch. 5: Coffee and Appointments

Finn passed Sara's office several hours later, but doubled back, knocking on the door.

"Come in."

Finn opened the door slightly, poking her head around the corner. "I'm making coffee, want one?"

Sara smiled, getting up. "Sure, I'd love one," she said, following her.

Finn poured two coffees, placing one in front of Sara. "So, uh... about earlier..."

Sara stood by the counter, taking a sip. "..Yeah. Look, I-I didn't plan that. I-it just...happened."

Finn nodded. "I believe you."

"And..if you're expecting me to apologize, honestly, I can't. I can't be sorry. All I know is, after so long, if I hadn't wanted it, my body wouldn't have moved. I know it's crazy..."

"If I thought you didn't mean or want it, I would never have kissed you back."

"That's fair, but I didn't mean to scare you if I did."

"Look, Sara, I... I've had my fair share of bad relationships. Hell, I've been married and divorced twice. I'm clearly not that great at it."

"Well, maybe you just found the wrong person, waiting for the right one. I'm not saying anything has to happen, but just please give it a little thought. For the record, you have soft lips," she smirked, carrying her coffee back to her office.

Finn bit her lip, smiling. Sara could certainly flirt. On her way back to her own office, she glanced through the window of the brunette's office, seeing the photos of the gorgeous redhead scattered around her office. She wasn't sure she could live up to everything Catherine had left behind.

Meanwhile, Sara went over fibers and bit of fiberglass in her lab a few hours later. She wondered though. Even if anything were to happen, she didn't know how she could handle it. She had pictures of her and Catherine and the kids everywhere. It would be quite a task. Though, IF they got that far, to be honest, her biggest worry - as everyone's was within the heat of passion - was calling out the wrong name. That she would never make up for, but it was a ways off yet. Very far.

"So, I've been thinking..." Finn said, bursting Sara's thought bubble as she walked in unexpectedly.

"Huh? Oh hi."

"Hi. I've been thinking about what you said... how about a drink? Say Friday?"

Sara looked up, surprised. "Sure. Sounds good," she said, smiling.

"Ok," she replied, tilting her head with her smile before leaving.

Sara pulled the analysis from the printer, smiling wider.

"You look happy," Lily smiled from the doorway.

"Uh...what's going on?"

"Don't worry, the kids are fine."

Sara smiled. "Come in. Then did you get bored?"

Lily walked in, closing the door over. "No, I wanted to talk to you about something Lindsay said."

Sara sat behind her desk. "Alright."

"She told me about Julie someone."

"Oh, Finn, yeah. What did she tell you? Do you disapprove or something? I mean, yeah it'll be a huge adjustment and that's only if things go well..."

"Sara, I haven't come here because I disapprove. I... Catherine would want you to be happy."

Sara sighed. "Thank you. It's just been so long, somewhat bored, mostly lonely. I..."

"We all need to be looked after."

"I know that. I know Lindsay is ok, but then, there's the twins, especially Mason. I-I just don't know. If things work out I don't even know how to bring it up."

"The kids will be ok with it eventually. Sure it'll take them a while, but sometimes you need to live for yourself."

"That's true and I think, for now, I should get to know her for...quite a while before anything. I mean, kids aren't great first date material."

Lily nodded. "I understand. I can look after the kids whenever you want."

Sara smiled. "Thank you. Oh, did you see what I got in the mail?" she said, showing her the ring and the card.

"Sara, it's beautiful."

"Yes it is. It's crazy that it was this far planned out."

"Not only did she love you, she adored you. Adored the kids. Sure, she had her job, but you were everything she lived for, and if there's one thing she wanted, it was for all of you to be happy."

Sara nodded. "I know and I hate to put pressure or expectation on, but, for some reason, I just can't help it... I-I know I really can't expect so much from nothing, but..."

Lily nodded. "Have you noticed Lindsay seems to be spending a lot of time in her room?"

"Well, I may have an answer to that, but it depends..."

"Which is?"

Sara smirked, going around to sit on the front of the desk. "Well, if the the test is like Lindsay thinks it could be, you may be become a great-grandparent, but that that depends on what Lindsay wants to do or even if it's true, so..."

"She's pregnant?!"

"Possibly. There...was an incident at a party. She's going to testify against him."

Lily sighed. "No wonder she's been going off the rails."

"I agree. And I will support her, no matter what she decides. The doctor will confirm it. She took a couple tests, but she'd rather have a doctor make the final call. She's already been to the team here, giving a statement and tested for infections and all that and evidence, which I applaud."

Lily kissed Sara's forehead. "I'll see you at home."

Sara smiled. "Hope they're being good."

"Always," she smiled, quickly leaving.

Sara sat back behind her desk.

The images of Catherine seemed to stare back at her. The auburn locks, her blue eyes, that smile...

Sara sighed, resting back in her chair and closing her eyes for a minute. She wasn't attempting to forget her wife. Ever. But it would be nice not to be so lonely.

A few days later, and with her pregnancy confirmed, Lindsay lay back nervously in the scan table looking to Sara.

Sara sat beside her, holding her hand. "How are you feeling?"

"Sick," she said, clutching Sara's hand.

Sara kissed her cheek. "It's going to be ok."

The young girl took a deep breath as the scan began. "Baby looks absolutely fine," she smiled. "You're measuring thirteen plus three days."

Sara held her gently. "Do you know what you want to do?"

Lindsay turned her head to finally look at the screen for a few minutes. "I want to keep it."

"Okay. If you're sure..."

"You don't think I should?"

Sara smiled. "I think you should do what you want."

"Even though what happened... it's still part of me too."

"Yes it is. And your mom's from you."

The doctor slipped from the room as Lindsay turned to Sara. "I always imagined she'd be here at my scan when I decided to have a baby. Crying her eyes out more than likely. As much as I miss her, I know she's watching over us making sure we're ok."

Sara smiled, hugging her. "She is. And we love you no matter what."

"I know. I love you too."

Reviews: joann & katvrah