Regrets?

Natalie walked through her front door, initially glad to be home she suddenly missed the chaos of Ronnie's home with the girls running around and the dog. Now she sat in silence quietly wondering why she hadn't sold the place, she lived with Ronnie 99% of the time. He had proposed to her once. Sighing she wondered why she had pushed everyone away. Her phone bleeped as she silently prayed it was a break in the case. Anything to stop her thinking about her life. She pulled the phone out of her jacket pocket.

'HI LUV. DUNNO WHAT UP. IM HERE IF U NEED ME. I LOVE YOU."

She smiled as she read the text. Her and Ronnie had known each other for years. He'd been the intake above her at Hendon. Had been her boss before the alcohol took over. She was terrified if she confided in him it would send him back to the drink. Sighing she placed the phone on the coffee table before the tears fell.

Xxxxx

"Something is up." Matt made coffee as Angie nodded. She knew Matt knew Ronnie better than anyone else. The older detective held them together. He was a father figure to the team - but it was obvious he was worried about something.

"Him and the Guv?"

"Maybe." Matt sighed. "I dunno."

"What can we do?" Angie paused. "They're good together."

"I know." Matt paused. "Maybe this case can help. We have to find the link between Liam and the scumbag who killed him. I know there's something going on with Spencer but I dunno what." He handed her the mug as Angie shrugged her shoulders.

"The computer is being taken apart by forensics now." Angie sipped her coffee hoping that they'd find something that would bring closure for Michelle and her children.

Xxxxxx

Natalie closed her eyes as the doorbell rang. She had gone back to her home to think. Her boys were off doing their own thing. She knew Ronnie would be at work for another hour or so. It was a chance to work through her own feelings before she decided what to do.

"I'm too old for this." She mumbled as the doorbell rang again. She wanted to scream. She had raised two boys singlehanded- despite being married her ex had been indifferent towards the children, ran a highly specialised and successful police unit and cared for her now departed mum. She didn't need the stress of this too. It was too much. She sighed; knowing her boys would just barge in. Anyone else would have been able to take the hint to leave her be. She bit her lip to stop the tears as she ignored the caller. Her phone rang again.

"Ronnie." She paused.

"No." The female caller answered. "Alesha. No offence but my feet are killing me and Cam is being to get tetchy. Please open the door."

Natalie smiled, remembering how toddlers could be. She got to her feet as she listened to Alesha.

"Ok, ok." She opened the door; ushering them in. Cameron climbed on the sofa promptly falling asleep.

"Crèche." Alesha explained. "Now why are you hiding away? You were putting this place up for sale. What changed?"

"Me and Ronnie."

"What?"

"I can't be with him."

"What? You love him! And I know he's always been in love with you."

"I can't." Tears filled her eyes. "I can't do it to im and the kids."

"Natalie."

"I've got cancer." Natalie stared at her friend. "I've got ovarian cancer. And I don't want Ronnie and the kids to watch me die."

Alesha sat in silence. She felt as if she had been punched in the gut as she let the words sink in. She shook her head. "Natalie."

"I can't let him watch me die."

Alesha watched as Natalie looked away. Seconds later Alesha was hugging her tightly. "No, no he's not going to. You're not going to die. You can't."

Xxxxx