First song is referred to the period of the flashbacks from Emily's point of view, the second to Emily's thoughts during those five years. It will always be like that, unless stated otherwise.
Paraghraps in italics are flashbacks. I missed them.
Read the author's note below, please.

Part Two

Better In Time

Chapter X

You're keeping yourself tied up
so you won't let me down
Didn't you ever think, just maybe

I'll understand you,
just give me the chance to
love you more than you'll ever know,
even if it means I gotta let you go

(Last To Know, The Wanted)

I gave it all, but you were fading
Where'd you go, all alone
I couldn't stay

(Part that's holding on, RED)

"I don't think the answer is in the bottom of that glass."

You look up from your now empty glass to stare at the bartender and she smiles at you as she fills it for the fourth time this evening. You quietly thank her and you take a sip, looking down. You still feel her eyes on you and try your best to ignore it, you know she's waiting for you to say something, but you didn't come here to talk. You needed to be alone, away from Robert, away from his comforting words and concerned looks. You understand he is only trying to be there for you, but you can't stand him anymore. He's only making it worse.

"I don't feel like talking."

She shrugs and says there are other things you could do, you choke and start coughing and you look at her stunned, her only explanation being a wink before she leaves and attends another client. You stare at her and you bite your lip, considering her offer. She doesn't seem interested into nothing more than one night stand and that's fine by you. You can't offer more. That part of you should have belonged to Emily, and Emily only, but you couldn't give it to her. If she couldn't have it, nobody never will. You can give the rest, though.

"What time do you get off?"

"That depends on you."

You blush and scratch your head embarrassed, that wasn't how you meant it. She laughs and you smile, you like the way she tilts her head and flips her red hair, you like the sound of her laugh. There's something freeing about it. You can't be free, you've come to realize that. You were, once. Those two months with Emily were the only times where you didn't feel like a bird trapped in a cage, the only time where you could spread your wings and fly freely. That before you found out you caged yourself even before you were free. You've also come to accept it. You may not like how certain parts of your life went, but it's the life you are supposed to have. You wouldn't change a thing.

"I'm Alex."

"A pleasure to meet you, I'm…"

"Paige, is that you?"

"Paige, is that you?"

"Welcome. What can I get you?"

You try your best to keep your voice steady and you stare at your notebook, tapping your pen on it out of nervousness. You should have asked Abby to take over the table, you can't do this. It's too much. Seeing Emily and Ashley again is overwhelming, you don't dare to look at them in the eyes. You're afraid of what you could see.

"Some explanations would be delicious."

"I'm afraid those are not on the menu."

Leah goes to speak again, but Emily puts a hand on her arm and shakes her head. You nod in appreciation, but she doesn't seem to acknowledge it and simply stares at the menu. You take their orders and you have to suppress a nostalgic smile – some things never change, Emily always used to be indecisive about what to order and she would end up choosing her usual each time. You sign her pepperoni pizza even before she tells you. You shift uncomfortably on your spot when the girl sitting next to Emily keeps on staring at you with great interest. You try to remember if you know her, but nothing comes to your mind. She must be someone new.

"We're going to drink later, are you coming?"

You look at who used to be your best friend and you bite your lip, not knowing what to say. Emily isn't the only one you left behind, you cut ties with everyone, not wanting them to know, to feel like they had to pick a side. Among all of your friends, Ashley has been the hardest to leave. Among all of your friends, she's been the one who fought the most to stay.

"I'll let you know."

She accepts your answer and you take your leave, sighing when you hear Leah asking her what she was thinking by inviting you. You won't cause troubles. You caused too many already.

You turn in the direction of the door with a smile on your lips to greet your best friend, but you freeze the moment you see who she is with. Ashley approaches you and wraps you into a tight embrace, scolding you for not telling her you arrived, and you can't do anything but mechanically apologize, your eyes fixed on Emily. God. She's even more beautiful that you remembered. She holds your gaze and you can see she's surprised to see you, to find you here. A bar, of all the places. A bar, not too much different from the one she finally let you go almost four years ago. You want to laugh. It seems that every time you try to forget about Emily Fields, the universe reminds you that she'll always haunt you. You want to laugh. You just listen to the sound of your own heart breaking, instead.

In the end, Emily asked you to stay, so you did. You know that she didn't ask you just because she wanted you to, not completely. They were all staring at her and it took her awhile to just greet you. This is not how you planned your night to go, you actually wanted to refuse, but you understood how hard it was for her to ask you to stay and you couldn't bring yourself to say no. So here you are, sitting on a couch between Ashley and Sydney in the private room of the bar, forced to listen how happy Samara makes her, how they started dating, how they fell in love. You'd like to kill Sydney and Amy for asking, but the reason you came to this wedding was to know the story, to know if Emily was really happy. To get some kind of closure - you want to tell her the truth.

"So, how did it happen? I bet she is the one who proposed."

"Actually, I did."

Your eyes shot up and bore into the side of her head. She knows she is being stared at, specifically by you, and that's why she doesn't look your way. She is avoiding your eyes, just like you're avoiding Spencer's. You can feel her eyes on you, scrutinizing every move you make, and that unsettles you. She knows the truth, she found out months ago. Has she told Emily? No, she would have contacted you, otherwise. She would have, that is who Emily is.

"Woah, that must have burnt, Murphy."

"She barely flirted back when we went to college, and now she's the one to propose? Of course it had burnt, Williams, it still does."

"Then perhaps I should consider becoming a firefighter."

"No, no, I won't risk your fine hands, my beautiful surgeon. I like them just the way they are."

You smile at Leah and Arizona's playful bickering, then all your eyes move to Emily who just nods and starts explaining: she was planning it for a while, but never found the right and perfect occasion to do it, so when Samara's parents invited them to Palo Alto, she took her to the place they had they first date – your eyes darken just like they did that night and you have to look away at that – and bought her an ice cream, taking her to the bench when they shared their first kiss – you clearly remember when Emily told you about it, about the evening she spent with Samara, and the night she spent pressed against you, whispering sweet and lovely words – and then proceeding to kneel in front of her and ask her, shaking and trembling – she didn't use many words, and you can see how that totally fits Emily, she never has been one for big words, she is her actions, her eyes, her smiles, the low sound she does when she laughs that you wouldn't notice if you weren't paying attention – but very sure of what she was doing.

"Who knew the cap was such a romantic?"

Sydney asks, causing everyone in the room but you to chuckle, you just freeze. You. You knew. You still remember the small gestures she made for you, you still remember the photos, each of them, she used to send you on the days you couldn't see each other; you still remember the notes she used to stick upon every thing that belonged to you, especially in your books – to encourage you to study, she would say; you still remember all the roses she brought every time you went out for a date – you still keep every petal, even the broken ones, in a box, in Emily's box, the one in which you keep everything related to her; you still remember the picnics at the beach she planned with care and love, paying attention not to bring anything you were allergic to but that she loved so she could kiss you, the late swims in the ocean, making love in the moonlight – sometimes, when you think about it, you can still feel the sand slipping on your body, you can still taste the sea salt of Emily's lips on yours. You still remember everything, and it still hurts.

Your gaze wanders around the room and, unsurprisingly, it lands on Emily. The real surprise is that this time she's looking at you. Her eyes are sympathetic and you understand she knows that you are thinking about, you manage an half smile and she gives you a barely noticeable nod before looking away. You sigh as you do the same. She starts asking Sydney about her last trip to Europe and you quietly stand up, reaching for the counter before she has the chance to ask about you. You know you're the only ones she doesn't keep in touch with, with her because work takes a lot of her time, with you because of a choice you've both made. You couldn't choose her and she stopped waiting. That was the last time.

You order a beer as you sit on one of the stool, softly shaking your head when Amy asks you to join them and pointing to the bottle that is now in front of you. You hum along with the music in the background, tapping your fingers on the counter, as you slowly drink. Not long after, Ashley joins you and you smile at her, saying there's no need to keep you company, but she simply shrugs as she takes the beer from your hand and quickly drinks the remaining beer. You look at her chuckling at her idea of sharing a drink, as you order another two.

"Careful, you may end up telling me your deepest secrets. Again."

"Are you shitting me?"

She stops mending your cut to look at you in the eyes. You didn't mean to tell her, it was just a slip up. She accepted your silence when she asked you the reason why you left, but she kept on staring at you, her look between affection and concern, and you exploded. If Leah hadn't pushed you over the edge, this wouldn't have happened. It's all her fault.

"That's why you left?"

You wince in pain when she disinfects the cut, even though she tries to be as gentle as possible. You have to admit it, Leah throws some really good punches. The cut above your right eyes says it all. If you hadn't been drinking as much as you did, you probably wouldn't have reacted that way. You would have ignored her jabs, you wouldn't have insulted her back, you wouldn't have fought back when she threw the first punch.

"You have to tell Em, I'm sure she'll understand."

You sigh, "It was not going to be fair to her, but most of all it wasn't going to be fair to him. The situation hasn't changed, I stand by my choice."

"You've taken the choice away from her, you didn't let her…"

"Her choice wouldn't have mattered", you cut her off, "the outcome was going to be the same. I had to leave, because it was the right choice for him. Look, I don't need you to understand, I just need you to promise me you're not going to tell anyone. Promise me, Ash."

You did what you had to. You broke Emily's heart, as well as your own, but you did what was right. You couldn't think about her, you couldn't think about yourself. You agree you should have, at least, told her what was happening, the reason you were leaving. She would have stayed, but she would have let you go if that's what you needed to do. But you were too scared, you couldn't tell her the truth. And now it's too late.

"I… I understand, I don't agree, but I understand. You have my word."

"Or maybe I could end up punching Leah."

She chuckles and shakes her head, saying that this time she wouldn't clean your wounds, and you smile, because you know she would. In the last few years, she always has been the one to get in the middle and separate the two of you every time things get rough. You always try your best to ignore her and she always does her best to get a rise out of you. She's worst than Spencer is. At least, her choice of weapons are her threatening look and words, but nothing more. Leah brings it to another level. You get that they're being protective of Emily, you really do, but it's not like you're planning to hurt her again. You even avoided every reunion you knew she would be attending, not wanting to cause more problems, afraid you would have broken your hearts again.

"Remember the old good days when I tried to make you drink and you constantly refused?" you nod, "I'm glad they're over."

You laugh and cheer together, then you let your eyes move around the room. You smile when you hear Hanna yelling in victory as she hugs Emily – you're happy to see that their friendship isn't ruined, you know that they still have a lot to do to get back to where they were, the fact Emily chose Spencer as her Maid of Honor proves that, but you know they'll make it – and you see Arizona trying to cheer up a dejected Leah. Lastly, your gaze lands on Spencer. As if she knows it, she looks up and your eyes meet for a brief moment, you have to look away. You're a coward. Her voice echoes in your mind. You took the easy way out. You know you did, you're here to fix your mistake. You ask Ashley for advice, you know she'll say what she really thinks, without holding back.

"I think it is something you should have done years ago."

You sigh, you know that, "I can't rewind time, Ash."

"Look, I get why you did what you did, I really do, but what was right back then is not now."

"She deserves to know."

"No. She did. Now she deserves not to know. You chose not to tell her and you gotta live with that, as she did. She understood you had to go and she accepted it, even without knowing why. She let you go. You should do the same."

Her words cut you like sharp knives. You know what she's saying. You kept it a secret for five years, you can keep it as such for longer. For all your life, if it comes to it. It is a burden you chose for yourself and now you have to carry it, no matter how much it weighs. You chose it, and you have to live with it.

"I did."

"Tell me that there isn't a small selfish part of you which wishes that she didn't, that she would stop the wedding once she knows and I'll believe you."

You look at her taken aback. No. You do not wish that. You just want Emily to know the truth. You let her go when she left you in the back alley of that bar four years ago. She understood that you weren't going to choose her and she left, she let you go. That's what you wanted, for her to let go of you, for her to be free. You open your mouth to answer, to say what Ashley asked you to, but nothing comes out, the words are stuck in your throat. She's right. There's a small part of you that wishes that. But the rest of you just wishes Emily all happiness you can. The truth will set you free, but not her. No. She's already free. You can't do this. This is your burden, and yours alone. You're not going to drop it on Emily's shoulder. It is yours, and you'll carry it. Alone.

You slowly exhale as you absently watch the smoke fading away in the summer breeze. You need a moment just for yourself, just to breathe. Once you finally understood what you have to do, you were able to enjoy the evening. You just had to let her go completely. It feels like you've lost a part of yourself, one of the most important, but it is also comforting on a certain level. You couldn't keep on holding on something that could never happen. You can finally see yourself moving on.

"I thought you were going to quit."

"I used to think the same."

You drift out your thoughts and you turn into Emily's direction. You smile at each other and you offer her a cigarette, but you already know what her answer is going to be. When her soft "No, thank you" comes, you're not surprised. You chuckle. It's not healthy, after all.

"I didn't know you smoked."

"New habit."

You don't point out that she couldn't possibly know, since you haven't seen each other in over a year, since you walked away. You smile when she says it's not healthy and you simply shrug. Your dreams all died more than a year ago. A life with her, a career in the Olympic team with her. You couldn't have it. So you completely devoted yourself to the one reason you left, making it your new and only dream.

"I haven't got the chance to congratulate with you for the Olympics. I knew you would win. It seems that dreams come true, after all."

"Not all."

You, me and a happy… You nod, conceding it to her. You didn't simply destroy your own dreams, but one of hers as well. You weren't the only one to want that. That's what you're most sorry for. It was her dream, too. She steps in front of you and she raises her hand to inspect the cut, shushing you when you're about to protest. She asks you what happened between you and Leah and she gently rubs the cut with such care and worry that your heart aches, you try not to wince as you lose yourself in the soft way her thumb moves on your eyebrow, in the warmth of her hand on your cheek.

"She thought it would be funny to remind me of what I lost. As if I don't know already."

She drops her hand and stares at you, you immediately miss the contact, the warmth. You bite your lip and shake your head when you see her eyes moved to your lips. This is something she would end up regretting. She glares at you icily, muttering that it is her choice, not yours. She's not referring only to this moment, you know that. Choice is what matters the most to the two of you. And you didn't leave her any when you decided for the both of you. She is asking you not to do the same now. You shake your head, again. You won't.

"Because I couldn't stand the thought of you no longer looking at me the way you used to", you whisper when she asks you why you didn't let her choose, "I still can't stand it, you still look at me like that."

She crashes your lips together and your hands immediately land on her back, keeping her up, the cigarette falling to the ground, already forgotten. Her lips move to your neck and you try to remind her of the reasons you shouldn't be doing this, but she shuts you up with a kiss at every attempt. You're not trying to stop her, you already know what her decision is, but you want her to know what exactly she is choosing. Each kiss is more desperate than the one before and they remind you of your very first night together. You give yourself completely to her, you know this is the last time.

"You just missed Spencer yelling at Leah."

She laughs, and God, her laugh, and you ask her what she did this time. Apparently she tripped over Arizona's legs and fell on her face on the cake Spencer brought, then proceeded to lick her lips, humming happily, and to congratulate Spencer because it was delicious. Emily animates the whole scene, imitating everybody's reaction and, by the end of the story, you both have tears in your eyes from laughing too much. You wish you were there just to see Spencer's livid face, you bet it was a sight to see.

"Did someone record it?"

"Of course. You know how Hanna is."

You both chuckle and you tell her to lead the way back inside, but she doesn't move. You look at her worried you did something wrong, but she quickly shakes her head. It got awkward in just one moment. You must have done something. You wait for her to say something, to explain, and she eventually does. Her words, softly whispered, as if they're a secret that nobody can know of, makes your heart race. You can finally see yourself moving on, but you know it won't happen anytime soon.

"I'm glad I came, too."

"Do you need a ride?"

You turn into Alex's direction and your eyes meet, you smile as she does the same. You were second guessing your choice, but now you're sure. You're going to stay. You thank Ashley and slowly shake your head. You'll stay and try to forget about Emily, even if just for one night. Robert always pushes you to stay out more, and that's something you rarely allow yourself. It's something you can concede yourself now. Something you need.

"Have fun with Anne Bonny over there."

You chuckle as you shake your head amused, nicknames have always been her thing. She simply winks at you before joining Sydney and Amy at the door, you wave at the both of them and you shift your gaze to Emily, just a brief look, then you look away. Hanna asks you if you want a ride, but you give her the same answer you gave Ashley, smiling thankful at her. You managed to maintain some kind of friendship with her, not because either of you actually tried, it just happened. Caleb has always been Robert's best friend and he has always been there, meaning that Hanna had been there, too. You tried to hide the truth from her, but it eventually reached the point where you just couldn't anymore. It was too evident. And when she found out, her first instinct was to tell her Emily, but you were able to talk her out of it. She actually listened to you, something Spencer refused to do, and, in some way, she understood – the fact that they lost each other after college was a huge factor when she decided to keep your secret, the fact Emily didn't need you to hurt her even more being the main. But she stayed even after she and Caleb broke up, you were the one who helped her afterwards. It is a relationship you never thought you would keep. You saw your friendship with Spencer crumbling down, you thought the one with Hanna would have followed the same course, but you're glad that it didn't.

"I expect a dance tomorrow."

You smile, "Sure thing, but I must remember you of the danger."

"Still can't dance?"

"Not even if my life depended on it."

Hanna laughs and you see a smile tugging on Emily and Spencer's lips, too – the latter tries to hide it, but to no use. They wish you a good night and you do the same, nodding. As they leave, you hear Emily saying that she hopes to find a ice cream shop still open and you close your eyes, knowing why. Samara loves ice cream – chocolate being her favorite flavor. You can still remember feeling the taste of it in her mouth that night, you can still remember the sinking feeling in your chest, the burning jealousy in your stomach, the darkness embracing your mind when you tasted another woman on her lips, you can still remember the happiness uplifting your soul when she said you were the one that she loved. You sigh deeply, not being able to prevent the memories from drowning you. Before Hanna handed you the invitation to their wedding, you always were able not to think about Emily, you were able to decide whether to let Emily haunt you or not. From that moment on, you simply weren't anymore. She came to your mind more often and you couldn't block her out like you always did. The faster the wedding day approached, the less you were able to prevent the memories from rushing in. You don't feel in control, you haven't felt that way in months, and that scares you. You've no control over it and it's driving you crazy, there's no possibility of choice. You can only live again those moments, even if you don't want to. You don't have a choice.

"Are you ready to go or you want to drink something before?"

You open your eyes and smile at Alex. Maybe you can try and gain some control. You can choose and this is all you've ever wanted. One way or another, you were never free to make your choices. Because of your parents and Robert in the past, because of AJ now. Your time with Emily has been an exception, it has been a bliss, and, obviously, it had to end. Now you can only indulge in the few hours of freedom you concede yourself every now and then. You can allow a few hours with Alex. It's a easy choice, one of the few that you have.

"Lead the way."

Author's note: The second guest who reviewed last chapter made me think that I need to make something clear. Now, I don't know what they didn't like about the chapter and I'll be glad if they would explain so I could understand and possibily answer properly, but here the things I wanted to say, even if I'm not sure this is what they meant:

- I kinda knew that going into this direction and writing Samara's point of view would be a somewhat risky move, but this is where the story is going and Samara has a huge part in it. My plan has always been to switch the point of view every part of the story, so part three will have different narrator(s) again. In this part, Samara is a very important character, as I already said. She is needed to explore the dynamic between her and Emily, just as in the previous part I used Emily's point of view to explore Paige and Emily's one. Until Paige finally opened up in the first part you didn't know what was going on through her mind and you could only rely on Emily's interpretation. This time you have Samara's interpretation of her relationship with Emily and you don't know what Emily really thinks - I'll only say that Samara knows Emily really well. If this is a problem I'm sorry, but this is where the story is going.

- This is not exactly a love story. I'll go as far as to say that it, indeed, is not. That's the reason I removed the pairing tags in the description (I really don't know what to call them). The story revolves around romance, but it's not about it. The title, Chains, and the description say it all. It's about the freedom of being who you are and the possibility to make your own choices. We have Samara who never really had problems with neither of them, Emily who struggled with both but managed to 'fix' her situation and Paige who still struggles with the both of them and, hopefully, someday will be free. They are different, but at the same time they're similar. All of them had gone through a lot. They loved, they have been hurted and broken down by life, but each of them has dealt - is still dealing - with it in a different way. This is what the story is about. If it is something that doesn't interest you I'm again sorry, but there's nothing I can do about it.

That being said, I hope you'll continue reading and enjoying the story. If that doesn't happen, I'll understand.

Feel free to contact me wherever you want (well, not really, here or tumblr), I am always glad to clarify something and open to discuss. Let me know what you think!

Meek.