He wasn't as gentle as he could have been—as he would have been had he not been utterly blind with wanting her. As it was, he pushed her up against her dresser hard enough to send bottles of perfume, makeup and hairspray flying. The articles clattered to the ground and rolled across the stained floor. Lucy didn't seem to mind. She caught his mouth with hers and kissed him frantically, needing to be closer than close. Natsu's hands worked at her housecoat, fingers fumbling with the tie at the front. Frustrated when it didn't immediately loosen, his hands caught flame and burned through the fabric.

Lucy startled back and said, "Careful," without any conviction behind the word, for the fear had retreated. It was just something automatic and human that flew out of her mouth in the midst of mindless want.

"Shut up," he told her and fiercely pulled the pink fabric aside, needing to see what was underneath. So much pale skin. He groaned, eyes drawn first to her rose-tipped breasts, and touched them forcibly with too-hot fingers.

Though his hands burned, Lucy didn't pull away, both enjoying the pain and needing to keep herself as still as possible; even the slightest movement now could have that killing magic erupting from her body and putting an abrupt end to what was sure to be an exciting night. Just hold on until later. You can let it out after. Take what he's giving to you and then you can have some release. The blackness quieted a little, the promise of later destruction placating it just enough that she was able to reach out and tuck her fingers inside Natsu's shirt. He gasped and pinched her breasts when her skin touched his. She squirmed, a half smile on her lips, then pushed his hands aside. Natsu growled and tried to come back.

"Wait," she commanded.

"No, you said—" he began.

"I want to see you," she cut him off and tugged at his shirt for emphasis.

"Oh," he replied, feeling abashed. She wasn't pushing him away, she wanted more of him.

When she grinned and yanked at his shirt again he helped her by lifting his arms above his head. Lucy threw the clothing haphazardly on the floor and marvelled at his exposed chest. Tracing her finger down the centreline of his body was a breath-holding experience, one that required concentration as she sketched a line between his pectorals, over his abs, then skimmed the waistline of his pants. She loved the way he looked, tightly chorded muscles, scars from various scuffles, hardened and dangerous. She loved that he was letting her touch him like this. She loved that he twisted and groaned and pressed so hard against his pants. She loved the control he gave to her without even realizing he was giving anything away. It was the closest thing to real love she had ever gotten, though it was all wrapped up in shadowy, violent want and too-little thought.

While she touched him, Natsu reveled in the dusky, hungry look in Lucy's eye. She was going to take him apart piece by piece that look said, and he would gladly lay down for the suffering he was about to endure, if it meant that he could do what he wanted to her.

When Lucy's fingers hesitated over the waist of his pants, he moved in closer and flicked his tongue against her lips. She opened for him, enjoying his alcohol-laden kiss.

His mouth still on hers, Natsu pushed her housecoat the rest of the way from her shoulders. It fell to their feet, forgotten. She was insistent in the way she kissed him, demanding his attention and demanding that his mouth hover over hers. It took wrapping his hand in her hair and holding her in place for him to be able to pull back and appreciate her. Pale skin, halo of blonde hair, fever-bright cheeks and dark, dark eyes.

His body pulsed painfully. Releasing her, he pushed aside her teasing fingers and undid his pants, desperate to have more skin against her. Before he could fully work them over his thighs, she grabbed his erection, skin against skin. Natsu caught his breath and gripped the band of his pants so tightly his bones creaked.

Nothing escaped Lucy's attention. Seeing him struggle made her purr darkly, pleased with herself. Whispering his name, she massaged his hardness.

Looking at her from between his lashes, Natsu saw that for a moment her pale skin was dark and shifting, as if something was working through her. He almost pulled back—normal girls didn't do things like that, their skin didn't flit between alabaster white and inky black—but then he was bombarded with a slew of sensation as Lucy came in and nipped her teeth over his neck. Her fingers squeezed tighter around him, her other hand pushing down the back of his pants to grab his ass tightly. Natsu made himself let go of the material and kick his way out of the pant legs, his movements awkward and frantic, not nearly as cool and collected as he had always imagined them being. He was too lost in Lucy to care though. He pulled the girl tight against his chest, enjoying the way her skin cooled his. Then he fisted his hands in her hair and pulled her head aside just far enough so he could run his tongue from the edge of her shoulder all the way up to her earlobe. He bit her there, her earring digging into his tongue. All he tasted was copper and iron and skin. Lucy shivered, her hands finding their way up his body to his shoulders and then Natsu was suddenly being bullied back towards her bed.

"We have to do this now," Lucy murmured, her voice barely a breath as it left her lips. She squeezed his shoulders almost painfully while an intense chill rocked through her. Her breath stuttered and stalled and something cold brushed against Natsu's chest. The area went startlingly numb.

"Ow, what was that?" he asked. When he tried to touch the spot, Lucy grabbed his wrist and pulled his fingers towards her mouth, tongue flicking out to caress them. Natsu moaned and forgot about the pain between his ribs. Inside her mouth was soft and velvety and he couldn't help but imagine what it would feel like working over other parts of his body.

She pulled away and panted. "Hurry, Natsu." Gods.

Her voice was hectic and frantic and fraught. It punched through him and consumed him like wildfire searing through a dead, dry forest. When she laid her freezing hands against his bare chest and urged him backwards with quick little shoves, he nearly tripped in his haste to obey. He righted himself and saw it was a desiccated orchid he had stumbled on, it's leaves black and crumbling. He opened his mouth to question what happened to it, but Lucy came back for his lips again and the question died.

The mattress hit the backs of his legs and she pushed him down flat on her bed, then climbed atop of him, her legs brushing against his, her breasts skimming ever so gently over his body. He gasped for air, his excitement making him nearly blind. Lucy hesitated above his stomach before grazing her tongue gently over his muscles in slow, teasing circles. Her hands were back around his shaft. For a girl that was in such a rush seconds before, she pumped in frustratingly leisured movements.

It still felt amazing. Too amazing.

Natsu swallowed back a loud moan and fisted his hands in her gold locks. He didn't have to tell her what to do. She shimmied down further on her own accord and took him into her mouth. Her lips were cool but her tongue was almost burning hot, even for a fire mage. Natsu released her hair and weaved his hands in his own unruly locks, his palms pressing into his eyes until he saw spots.

"Fuck," he swore. Lucy moaned, the sound muffled around his body. Natsu's head rolled back and he released a warbling breath. Any apprehension he felt earlier was buried under the sensation of Lucy's mouth working over him. He laid back and let her do what she wanted until she pulled away and panted, the sound too rough, as though she were struggling with something particularly troublesome. Natsu moved his hands from his eyes and found her in the dimly lit apartment. Perched above his body, her skin was duskier than it should have been, eyes dark-liquored, mouth slightly parted in a moan. One hand was between her legs, the other cupping her breast and pinching. He took her in and committed that view to memory; she looked temptatious and sultry; like everything he had ever wanted.

He sat up and grabbed her by her thighs. Her eyes opened, startled, and then a slow smile curved her lips. "Natsu," she said his name fervently, and almost like she'd forgotten he was there. His body pulsed again. He kissed his name from her lips and pulled her up further so she was properly on his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck and shimmied so their bodies were inches from each other.

"Tell me you want this."

"I already did—" he mumbled into her mouth.

"Tell me again. I need to know for sure," she interjected.

Natsu pressed his face into her neck and smelled the heady syrupy scent rising from her skin. It made him dumb with need. "I want this," he affirmed and meant what he said.

Lucy's sigh came out resigned. "I was afraid of that."

Natsu paused. "What does that mean?

"Kiss me," she said by explanation.

When he opened his mouth to object again, Lucy lowered herself on top of him, thoroughly severing any thoughts in his mind. He squeezed her hips and did as she asked, kissing her until it became too painful, until his lips burned with cold and he had to pull away. Lucy pushed him back onto her bed and pinned him there with two artic hands against his chest and did what she had been too afraid to do the night before, no longer caring what came afterwards.

He filled her up like Zeref wouldn't. It wasn't the same, and yet it was. It satiated something in her, at least.

She moved faster. Beneath her body, Natsu's hands were back in his hair, his head was tipped back so it looked like he should be staring at the opposite wall, though Lucy knew he'd never taken his eyes from her. He peaked at her from between thick lashes, maybe wondering what it was she'd become, because she could feel the magic struggling through her, tainting her skin black, maybe thinking of nothing much at all, just revelling like she wanted him to. If Natsu Dragneel died tonight, he would die happy, or a close approximation thereof. There was that, at least.

On her periphery, she felt Zeref, too. There was no doubt in her mind that he knew what she was doing. That he watched. That he was furious, but that he actually sort of enjoyed it, too. Every time she brought herself down on Natsu and cried out too loudly, she felt the electric thrill that went through the demon king. He didn't want to enjoy it. That tidbit of information only made Lucy hotter. Pleased and feeling almost like she was having both of them, she sat up straighter, positioning Natsu so he was hitting a spot that made her sweat and shake and moan, and had him that way until chills took her and a powerful orgasm crashed through her body.

Small tendrils of black magic took advantage of her break in concentration and leaked into Natsu's chest. He winced again, but didn't voice his complaint this time, the power brought him to the precipice and Lucy's scratching nails, her hot sighs, and her pulsing body took him and threw him over. He came, black spots appearing in front of his eyes, and took his hands out of his hair so he could hold her hips and keep himself buried deep inside of her.

Lucy felt everything, from his increased heartrate, to his throbbing erection, to the hot flush that overcame him when he orgasmed. In response, the magic pressed harder than ever at her control. Bits here and there escaped from her hands and shot into Natsu's chest. Each time it happened he hissed and moaned and grasped her hips tighter, not knowing what was happening but enjoying it; it made his orgasm last longer. Made it more intense.

Lucy let him writhe, too caught up in the sensation of the rolling power, too busy trying to keep it all inside, too busy gasping and silently praying that she wasn't about to kill him and struggling with half-wanting to, just to see if she could. The admission brought with it only the smallest bit of guilt, but the guilt made everything seem a little bit better. She was happy Natsu was beneath her, his eyes heavy-lidded, his fingers gripping her tightly. She was happy he was drawn to her inexorably. She was even a little bit happy that he seemed to suffer as much as he enjoyed.

Dropping down, she kissed the one final moan from his lips. he grasped her hair, pulling painfully. That was okay, the pain felt good, too.

Finally, panting, Natsu looked at her. Her skin was slicked with moisture, her eyes bright in the night. He took his hands from her body as if she had burned him, then threaded his fingers behind his head of pink hair and stared resolutely at the ceiling. He wouldn't meet Lucy's gaze when she tried to capture him with her eyes. She shrugged and leaned down to kiss him one last time. His lips were stiff against hers, as if he suddenly regretted what he had done. Instead of getting angry, she smirked.

"I'm going to shower," she said and climbed from his lap.

Natsu watched her go, thoughts whirling at break-neck speed. His body and mind fought viciously. He felt good, better than he had in days, but he also felt terrible, like he was coming down off of whatever high Lucy had him on and the comedown was rough. Everything was sliding back into place. He hadn't meant for this to happen when he came here. He was still riotously angry with her, and now he was furious with himself, too. Why did he have sex with her? He had planned on coming over here and… well, the whole thing had been a dumb idea anyway, but he certainly hadn't envisioned his ill-conceived plan to fight with her going so horribly awry.

I have to get out of here, he thought. She did something to me, she tricked me. He thought back, Lucy? Because Lucy would never do anything like that, not ever. But perhaps she would; he couldn't argue with the evidence. Something was very, very different about her, and now that his senses were slowly coming back, he noticed that her subtle smell was wrapped up with something sick and familiar, something that was as enticing as it was terrifying, but it was just different enough that he couldn't quite place it.

As soon as the bathroom door closed behind the blonde, Natsu rose and began gathering his things, moving quick enough that he tripped over tipped bottles of beauty products, too loud in the quiet apartment. He winced, thinking she was going to come out and see what he was doing, slinking away behind her back like a coward, but then her shower turned on, muffling his movements and he moved faster, shoving his legs haphazardly into his pants and throwing his shirt on both backwards and inside out. He gave one last look at her trashed apartment, then leapt out the window.

From the washroom, Lucy heard Natsu crashing about. She even thought she knew what he planned on doing. She considered stopping him, talking to him, convincing him to stay just a little longer just because the magic wanted him, but there was still a shred of her old self. She couldn't ask him to leave. She wouldn't ask him to stay, though. If he knew enough to save himself, then he should be allowed to do it.

Zeref's magic was pricking at her, uncomfortably hot. It wanted out, otherwise it would tear her apart and there would be nothing left.

Standing under the hot shower spray, she let the first wave of blackness shake through her. It was so forceful, all she could do was gasp and lean back against the cold wall. Tears pricked her eyes. It hurt to let it go after so long holding it in. The shadows trundled across the tile, played through the water like tangible things, and seeped through the floor. She felt the woman downstairs clutch her heart. She felt her breath stutter in her lungs, felt her choke and gasp and then fade away. She tried to care, but the release was too intense, too gratifying. It doesn't matter. It's not Natsu, you're okay. She told herself again and again that this was exactly who she was and she shouldn't feel guilty for it. It was easy to convince herself.

Until the air before her shimmered and Loke came into being. She pulled back on the magic, dismayed.

He stood in her shower looking out of place in his black suit. It dampened and stuck to his body, but he didn't try to move. His hair was as unruly as ever, the burnt orange locks sticking up at odd angles. He had abandoned his glasses so his hazel eyes tunnelled into Lucy's with an intensity that was difficult to ignore.

"Loke," she greeted, only half surprised to see him. She suspected that he'd make an appearance after that fiasco—there wasn't much she could hide from her spirits, they were connected in ways even she didn't fully understand—though she didn't suspect it would be so soon, and in such a… awkward place.

His skin rolled with black like hers had. It was gone again almost before she'd really registered it, though she thought she'd know the feeling of Zeref anywhere. His magic was invading Loke as it was her. The thought pleased her. The thought made her ill. Pleasure was a heavier hitter. "How's the shoulder?"

His eyes roved briefly over her nude body. When he looked at her again, his cheeks were only slightly pink. "Fine, no thanks to you."

It was a lie, she knew. If it was fine, he wouldn't be sewn together with bits of black thread. She let it go. "I didn't think you were the type to crawl into girl's showers."

Loke blushed for real this time, his neck high with colour. "I needed to talk to you and this was the best time."

"I doubt that," Lucy said flippantly, feeling in control once more.

Loke ground his teeth together. "When was better? When you were manipulating your friend into sleeping with you, or when you were fucking shadows?"

Magic roared up in her, violent and sweet. "That's none of your business."

Loke's eyes widened. He bit his cheek to keep himself stable. Where was the girl he was contracted to? Where had Lucy Heartfilia gone and who stood before him now?

Lucy closed her eyes and pulled back on the magic that wanted to tear her spirit apart. She could feel Zeref on the other end of that, obviously piqued. Unable to help herself, she prodded at the demon king and received a hot poker of darkness straight in her chest for her efforts. She groaned and doubled over, clutching the place.

"Lucy!" Loke came forward under the spray of water and grabbed her by the elbows. "Are you alright?" For a moment he was well and truly scared, believing that this was it, that the magic was going to tear her apart right in front of his eyes. He couldn't watch it, couldn't stand to see her die. Not yet, not yet, not yet, he pleaded to any god that would listen. I just need a little more time. Please.

"Lucy, answer me!" He hated the way his voice warbled, fear strung through every chord.

Lucy clenched her hand over her heart one more time, gasping. Loke pulled her upright so she was looking into his too-pale face. "Tell me you're okay."

She closed her eyes for a millisecond to get herself under control. The pain was gradually fading. She didn't know if that meant that Zeref had forgiven her or if he simply was waiting to come to her in person to punish her appropriately. She wondered what that entailed, if he truly was going to kill her this time as he had threatened before. She met Loke's eyes and blinked twice, trying to orient herself. She was so close to him that she could feel his breath breaking over her skin.

"I'm alright," she managed.

"Bullshit. What was that?" the spirit demanded.

Lucy clutched her fingers into his bicep and pushed out her borrowed magic, searching for Zeref. "Nothing," she practically moaned, both terrified and desperate, needing to know if she was about to be ended by him or if he was going to let this night pass in silence. What was better? Seeing him. Definitely. Even if it meant dying.

"Lucy," Loke said seriously. There was something in his voice that made her loose the magic and look into his dark eyes. "Lucy, are you calling for him?"

She shook her head wildly, damp hair sticking to her pallid cheek.

"Don't lie," he spat.

"I'm not," she said defensively, but it was a weak argument. He saw right through her.

"I'm telling Natsu what you've done. I thought—hoped—that maybe you'd make the right choice and do it yourself, but you're too far gone." He scolded himself for waiting so long, but he hadn't been in his right mind. Still wasn't. It was easy to want to fall into that darkness with Lucy. It felt terrible, but it felt good, too.

"You can't tell him," Lucy said after a beat.

"Are you going to do it?" Loke wondered, not really expecting a yes.

"Loke…" she tried to plead with him. He looked back at her with hard eyes. A small bead of water caught on his rigid jaw and rolled to his chin. It trembled then fell, getting lost in the cool stream as it swirled ever downwards. Lucy felt like that drop of water, caught up in the mix.

"He'll hate me," she said finally.

"Maybe," Loke agreed.

She didn't want Natsu to hate her. She met his eyes. "I know you don't really want to do this."

"And that's where you're wrong," the spirit told her.

Lucy shook her head. "I know you kind of like it, just like I do. It hurts, yeah, but…" She reached out and felt the darkness within him, teasing it to the surface.

But it was absolutely intoxicating. Loke closed his eyes. "Stop."

"Look at me."

Loke shook his head stubbornly.

"I don't want to get better, and neither do you. Just stay with me, Loke. We don't have to argue about this. Nothing has to change." She found his hand and squeezed it. An electric shock shot through the spirit, weakening his resolve even further. I thought you were feeling so righteous. I thought you were coming here to convince her? I thought you were coming here to threaten to oust her secret so she'd do it herself?

Yes.

Her fingers snuck up his arm. "Loke."

Her voice was sweet poison.

"Loke, look at me."

He opened his eyes, unable to disobey her command. Darkness bled through her skin. Loke caught his breath. She looked as beautiful as she did rotten. Darkness could suit her, if she let it. It could suit us. He clenched his fingers tighter around her elbows and watched her expression turned introspective and calculating. Loke didn't know if that was any better or not.

He decided not a second later when she wrenched her arm out of his grasp and pushed up against him.

Further corrupting Loke in mind, dark magic played at her fingertips. Faintly, Lucy wondered if Zeref was going to be even angrier with her for this or if it mattered. If he was coming to end her, she might as well try, just to see what it was like, and if he forgave her, well, she wasn't put out by it.

"Lucy," Loke gasped as the magic pricked him. "That hurts."

There was a flash where Lucy was her old self. "I don't want to hurt you, Loke."

"Then don't," he replied as evenly as possible. It was hard to think with her throbbing with horrifying magic power and pushing against him naked. He scolded himself for thinking about that right now, but it was difficult to ignore. Especially when she twisted her fingers in his hair. "Let go—" he started, but was cut off when she raised on tiptoe and crushed her mouth to his, magic bleeding between them. He was still for a moment, temporarily weak. Then he kissed her back, the barest movement of his lips against hers. Then reason trickled through and he hauled himself away. There wasn't anywhere to go, not with the shower wall at his back, but he tried all the same. Lucy looked at him with feverish eyes, a wild, whimsical smile on her lips.

"What the fuck?" Loke demanded and rubbed the back of his shaking hand dazedly against his mouth. It didn't matter how much he wiped, he still tasted her there like an invitation to everything he had ever fantasized about, and he would for a long, long time. His blood was excited, the blackness in him writhing, hungry. What made it even worse was that he knew all he had to do was bring her back for more and she'd offer it. This isn't how I imagined kissing her, he reminded. She's not herself. Be stronger than that. He managed to straighten out his thoughts by reminding himself he wasn't the only one Lucy had been with that night.

"Loke," Lucy said. "Just trust me." All she had to do was force Zeref's magic through him. It wouldn't kill him, he was immortal. He could withstand it in a way she was afraid Natsu couldn't.

"You're all messed up, Lucy," he said in a shaking voice.

Her lips straightened. "Are you scared of me?" she whispered.

"I'm scared for you," he told her, but those words didn't even sound true to his own ears. He was terrified of what she had become, of what she was becoming still, of what he wanted to become with her. There was still a long way for Lucy Heartfilia to drop. It's your job to stop her, he told himself. It's your job to bring her back, remind her of who she is. Not fall with her.

"You don't have to be scared," Lucy told him. "I could never hurt you, not for real, not on purpose."

There was a hint of the old Lucy Loke knew. He latched on to that. "I know you don't want to hurt me, and none of your friends either. That's why I'm going to tell Natsu everything."

"Everything?" she asked emotionlessly.

He nodded.

"You can't," she said. "Loke, please!"

Loke shrugged out of her grasp and pushed her back. "You'll thank me after."

He was already fading away. Rage shot up inside of her. "Don't!" she tried to grasp the place where he had been but he slipped through her fingers. When that didn't work she loosed a harsh and hungry blade of power. It severed through the portal Loke had imagined into being. She thought she heard him gasp somewhere inside that magical field and hoped she hurt him enough to stop him from bringing her world down around her ears. She scoffed at that thought; things were already so far out of hand that she didn't recognize Lucy Heartfilia anymore.

As if to solidify that fact, the atmosphere pulsed and tightened and she knew Zeref was nearby. Her heart hammered in her chest, nervous and excited. For a breath both Natsu and Loke were shoved from her mind. She tried to find the demon king in all the magic that connected them. She felt him, he was angry and full of purpose and determinedly ignoring her while he dealt with whatever it was that made him so blind with ire.

A/N: I'm still a sucker for Loke. Haters gonna hate, hate, hate. I won't apologize.