The Curse of Dr. Zola
Chapter 38
They sat in the living room and Steve showed Bucky the latest books that had been found.
"It makes me wonder if there are more secret compartments in this house." Bucky said.
"I'll call Tony and see if he has any ideas on how to find them." Steve went to make the phone call.
Bucky opened the first page of the first book and read about Mary's then 10 year old mother talking about him.
"Uncle James lives in the basement."
"Look at my birthday present Uncle James!"
It made Bucky feel kind of weird.
"Tony says he'll fly up with some tech, and look around. I see you have read some of the book." Steve sat on the sofa next to Bucky.
"Yeah. It's very strange reading about myself."
"I can imagine. Wait until you get to the end on book one."
"Why? What happens?" Bucky flipped to the back and started reading.
He picked his head up. "She has a brother?"
"Apparently."
"What happened to him?"
"We haven't gotten that far."
Bucky kept reading until he blushed. He looked at Steve. "She named him after me?"
Steve just nodded.
Bucky picked up the next book.
Dear Diary,
Little James is unstoppable! He runs all day long and I'm exhausted. I am going back to work part-time while mama watches him. She has semi-retired, but fills in when she is needed.
Dear Diary,
We took Little James to the park today. He ran after the bigger kids and tried to keep up with them. His energy level is inexhaustible, but when the day comes to an end, he sleeps just like you Uncle James. He sleeps so soundly that I have a hard time waking him up. Oh, how I wish you were here and awake. I bet you'd love to take him on walks. He needs a father figure in his life. He's so trusting.
Bucky flipped pages, and read some more out loud.
Dear Diary,
It's been several days since this happened, but I just couldn't stop crying long enough to see to write.
I've had the worst day of my life!
Yesterday, I buried my son…
Bucky could barely get the words out. Sam, Steve, Nat and Clint all sat up to pay attention. Shocked looks and silence reigned over the news Bucky just read.
He swallowed hard to get the lump in his throat to go down before he could continue.
We had been planning a surprise for Little James, and we were going to the beach for the weekend. I don't know what happened! One minute he was running around like crazy, and the next minute he was dead!
He was at the very back of the yard where the trees were. Mama and I were talking. I called him for lunch but he never answered. By the time I got there, he was dead. The doctor said his neck was broken! HOW? HOW? WHY? WHY DID THIS HAPPEN?
Mama took care of all the details. I just spent every minute with you Uncle James. I couldn't stop crying. Poor Mama! Nothing she did could get me out of the basement. Finally, she gave up and let me stay there. You are all I have left to cling to, you and Mama.
Bucky choked up and lost it. He couldn't continue. Steve took the book and finished reading.
He was my whole world. Every minute was a wonder to behold as he discovered something new. He had learned to read so fast and would recite the numbers on your cradle from memory. He would ask me to tell him stories about how brave you were in the war. He wouldn't go to bed unless I told him a story about you. I spoiled him by starting that tradition.
I told him how his grandma and I had to run for our lives to escape Germany. Mama drove the truck and I "enchanted" people to let us pass. But I hated doing it! I always had a headache and felt sick afterwards. Mama pleaded with me, promised me things and said I could spend more time with you, so I did it for Mama. I did it for you.
I remember Mama telling me how strong and brave you were Uncle James. No matter how mad at her you got, you were always a good man. She told me how she tried to make you stay with her. She couldn't tell you why, but she told me how she regretted what she had done, and how it haunted her, and how she wished she had done things differently.
She hadn't told me much before Little James was born, but afterwards she told me a lot.
I can't ever have any more children because of the accident when Little James was born, but maybe, just maybe, when you are finally awake and have children of your own, you can visit with me and I can give them the books I've been writing. Maybe I can be their Auntie Willa! If you could just please forgive me, forgive us for what we robbed from you.
I am on my knees, Uncle James, to ask for your forgiveness. I beg of you, please. Mama was only trying to save you!
Steve stopped reading. He had to wipe tears from his eyes, and take a couple of deep breaths. He skimmed over some entries and read a few others out loud, including the one where Willa had met JT.
Dear Diary,
Today at the lunch counter I met a nice man. It's funny, but his name is James. James Thomas Bailey. It has a nice ring to it. We were both trying to place our lunch orders at the deli counter. We laughed over the mishap and decided to sit together. He seemed very nice, a lot nicer than anyone else I've met. He works for the telephone company. We had a nice lunch and asked if he could see me again. I said yes, and we made plans to meet tomorrow for lunch.
Dear Diary,
JT bought lunch for me. We took it with us to the small park down the block. We talked a lot. He's originally from Connecticut, up near where Katherine Hepburn lived. He apologized for being presumptuous, but he said if I wanted, he'd drive me up to see her estate. He has his own car Uncle James! Imagine that! I drive Mama's car, but I still don't have one of my own.
Dear Diary,
JT asked me to marry him! I said yes!
Dear Diary,
It's almost Christmas, and I've caught the bug going around at the office. 3 people have already come down with it and we've been short at the office. I've been staying late and now I've got it. Poor JT! He's been doing all the work for the holidays and Mama is coming. I tried to tell her not to come, but she insists on coming to care for me. JT will pick her up Christmas morning.
Dear Diary,
It's Christmas and Mama has come at last. I was throwing up again in the bathroom this morning. Mama wore her necklace and we saw it glowing this morning! Mama said it was a miracle! I don't know how, but somehow I'm pregnant! The doctors said I could never get pregnant ever again, but I am! I have been blessed with an angel! My very own angel from Heaven.
Dear Diary,
I gave birth to a baby girl today. She's so small! And precious! Little James was anything but little when he was born. She's about half his size! Her fingers are so tiny! But strong! She grabs hold of JT's fingers and won't let go. I have to laugh. JT was afraid to hold her, afraid he'd drop her. I showed him how to support her little head in the crook of his elbow. JT said that I was a natural mom.
I never told him about Little James… I've gotten too good at keeping secrets. I never told him about you Uncle James. Mama is keeping watch over you even though she's getting old now. JT and I talked at length and we've decided to name our baby girl after Mama. I wanted you to be the first to know. Thank you for being there for me Uncle James. I know it sounds strange, but aside from Mama, you've been the rock I've leaned on over the years. You got me through some of my most difficult days and nights. I wouldn't be here now, telling you of all my joy, if it weren't for you. I love you Uncle James.
Everyone was wiping tears from their eyes. Bucky was shaking his head, and he was trying to comprehend all of this. His heart and mind were overwhelmed. "I don't know if I'm worth all this Steve."
"It was evident in these pages that Mary's mom thought a lot of you."
"How? I was locked up in the freezer from the moment she first saw me. How could I have been there for her?"
"Steve's right you know. That poor woman went through a lot of pain, and the one constant in her life besides her mother was you. Even though you weren't physically able to comfort her, she transferred her feelings onto the one thing that never changed; you." Nat offered.
"How am I going to tell Mary her brother is dead? How did he even wind up with a broken neck?"
"I hate to go there with this, but maybe it wasn't an accident. We know someone was trying to kill Mary or Mary's mother at one point." Steve pointed out reluctantly.
"Oh my God! It was HYDRA. HYDRA sent someone to kill a child? Why, Steve, why? He was no threat."
"I….." Steve had nothing to offer.