"Happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo…"
"Don't feed the bears," Lindsay muttered into her pillow before rolling over.
"Hello sleeping beauty."
"Hello. What time is it?"
"Five. How long have you been napping?"
"Only about an hour. Colton still out?"
"Snoring."
"How was work?"
"Babe," Adam started, leaning down to run his lips over her neck. "Why are you talkin'?"
She chuckled and lightly tickled his arms, causing him to fall on top of her. He flashed her a grin and she ran her fingers through his hair letting out a gentle yawn.
"I gotta take a shower.
"No you don't."
"What?"
"You don't need a shower. What you need is about fifteen more minutes of this."
She half rolled her eyes before he kissed her. She melted into it for a while then pulled away, taking a deep breath and catching his eye.
"We've got people coming over in an hour. And I spent half the day outside chasing your son and I smell like air, so I need a shower."
"Mm'kay."
"Sorry."
"It's okay. We've got forever."
"I really love you."
"I suspected."
She grinned and kissed him again before he slid over to the other side of the bed and she stood up, stretching a little.
"Would you go wake Colton up and change his dirty grass stained clothes and his diaper?" she asked, reaching down to play with his hand.
"Yeah. Could you wear a white t-shirt and a black bra more often?"
She smirked and looked down at her outfit, wondering once again how a pair of Austin's jeans had made their way into her wardrobe and why she always forgot to give them back.
"I had a flannel on earlier."
"Mm-hmm."
"I did! I wouldn't go out in public like this!"
"I believe you, I just don't want to."
"It's not like it was raining today."
"You can't put that image in my head and then just leave me here."
"I'm about to," she said, shimmying out of her shirt and tossing it at his head.
"Woman…"
She grinned and went into the bathroom, leaving him to chuckle at her before he rolled off the bed and went to get Colton.
"Hi daddy," he chirped, looking up from the stuffed animals he was playing with.
"Hey duder. Want to get out of there?"
"Out."
"Let's get you changed. Probably into something comfy so Flack and Jess don't have to put you in pajamas later. See, I'm thinkin' like mama. Aren't you proud?"
Colton chuckled and rubbed his eyes while Adam changed his diaper.
"Now what should we do about clothes? How about your dinosaur shirt and some sweatpants? Now that is what I would like to be wearing."
He pulled the clothes out of the dresser and changed him quickly, then set him on the floor.
"Alright man, run free. I'm going to pick up some of your excess of toys. I don't know why you have so many, you only like five of them."
Colton giggled and leaned down to peek under the crib where both cats were sleeping.
"Mow!" he shouted, patting his legs. The cats didn't move but to give him the stink eye. He roared at them and got pretty much the same reaction, so he stood back up and toddled over to Adam, raising his arms and sporting a toothy grin.
"Okay, let's go wrap mama's present. Don't tell her I waited until the last minute to wrap it though."
Colton nodded seriously and they went out to the other room where Adam took the present from its hiding spot. He knew Lindsay was going to snoop, so he hid it way up high where she couldn't even reach on a chair. Colton wiggled down to the floor and opened the bottom drawer, pulling out a few Tupperware containers to play with while Adam found some wrapping paper in the hall closet. He briefly wondered if he had enough time to finish, but he could hear the country station playing in the bathroom and Lindsay singing along, so he figured he was alright. He set to work cutting the paper and wrapping it around the small box, wishing he would have been in Boy Scouts so he could have learned how to do this properly. He was using more tape than paper and was sure Lindsay wasn't going to be able to open it without an Exacto knife. Not like she didn't have that jack knife in her pocket all the time anyway.
Her voice floated out to him and he knew she was reaching one arm out of the shower to turn the radio up. He smiled at her voice, wishing she sang more often, but knowing a request would fluster her too much. She had a really good voice, but she didn't really believe him when he said that. He supposed she'd done too much karaoke for fun that she figured she sounded like everyone else. He loved how she'd slip into a twang when singing along to the right artists, the little grin she'd get and how her eyes seemed to dance along to the music. A smile spread across his face as she hit a high note crystal clear and continued on as if it was nothing.
"You can kiss me in the moonlight
On the rooftop under the sky
You can kiss me with the windows open
While the rain comes pouring inside
Kiss me in sweet slow motion
Let's let every thing slide
You got me floating, you got me flying."
He chuckled and looked the present over, figuring it was good enough, then cleaned up his mess. The shower clicked off and he waited a few minutes, then moved to stand by the door. She opened it in a swirl of steam and took a step back in surprise. Her damp hair curled lazily around her shoulders, she had a towel secured around her, and her face was completely free of make-up. He watched as her lips parted in preparation for asking him a question or admonishing him for surprising her, but he didn't let her get that far. Instead, he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her, dipping her so far that the ends of her hair brushed the ground. She held on tight and giggled as he righted them, brushing a lock of hair out of her face.
"What was that about?"
"You were singing that song," he said. "Thought it might be a birthday wish."
She snickered and wrapped her arms around him, leaning into his chest and feeling as if she could burst.
"I think the amount that I love you might be illegal."
"I love when you're rebellious."
"Me too."
"Go get dressed."
"Thought you liked me rebellious."
"Yeah."
"And in nothing but a towel."
"Dear…"
"I'll go get dressed."
He let her go, then joined Colton on the floor, gently encouraging him to put the plastic dishes away.
"No!" he shouted, taking a lid back out of the drawer.
"Yes."
"No!"
"Young man, I said yes. Now you put that away please."
Colton jutted out his lower lip in a last ditch effort, then sighed and set the lid back in the drawer.
"Thank you for obeying," Adam said, drawing his son into his arms. "I love you buddy."
"Daddy."
"Are you going to be good tonight so mama and daddy can have a couple hours off?"
He spouted off some gibberish and smiled then wiggled away in search of something else to play with.
"Honey, what are we doing tonight?" Lindsay asked from the bedroom.
"I can't tell you."
"Well what do I wear?"
"Whatever you want. Can you just wear what you put on this morning?"
"It looked good when I had morning butt. Now I have evening butt."
"You've got to stop watching that show."
"Sometimes I think you don't understand me, Adam."
"I always understand you."
"Then understand my frustration about finding something to wear."
"Jeans. Shirt. Shoes."
"That it?"
"You know what I meant."
"Sometimes I can be kinda blonde," she teased, coming out of the bedroom in jeans and a black v-neck tee shirt. "Is this okay?"
"Perfect. Except you're going to need shoes."
"What kind?"
"Lindsay Ross."
She giggled and went back into the bedroom.
"I'm wearing your Chucks and you're gonna deal with it."
"Alright. Now come out here, you have a present waiting."
"But I gotta do my hair."
"You gotta?"
"I ain't gonna go out like this."
He chuckled and watched her walk into the bathroom, then made sure Colton was occupied before he followed her.
"What are you doing?" she asked, plugging the hair dryer into the wall.
"Hanging in your world," he replied, jumping up onto the counter while she ran a brush through her hair. "Can I do that?"
"I love you but no."
"Aw come on," he pleaded, pulling her into his arms. She laughed and let him hug her for a while before leaning back and kissing him.
"Why so touchy feely today?"
"I'm touchy feely every day."
"You don't usually follow me places to do it."
"Sorry."
"I didn't say I didn't like it," she said, running the brush through her hair one last time and placing it on the counter.
"Well in that case…"
He spun her around and turned the hair dryer on, and she shivered at the burst of warm air. His fingers ran through her hair, giving the air a place to go and she sighed happily. He pampered her often with hand massages or back rubs but she thought that this little display topped them all. Especially when his fingers grazed over her ear and down her neck to her shoulder. She closed her eyes and leaned back against him just a little until he turned the hair dryer off and wrapped his arms around her.
"I love you, babe."
"I love you too."
"Thanks for being born."
"Anytime."
There was a knock on the front door and he placed a loud kiss to her ear before jumping off the counter.
"Hurry up woman."
She grinned and pushed him out of the bathroom then grabbed the hair straightener and made sure it was heating up.
"Happy one year closer to death, Ross," Austin greeted with a grin. Lindsay looked at her and glared.
"Gee thanks."
"What'cha doing?"
"Make-up. Something you would know nothing about."
"I refuse to engage in such girliness. I still spit my eyebrows down in the morning."
"And here I was gonna say you don't need the make up anyway. Now I think you need some Lysol."
"Insert giggle here. What's that?"
"Eyelash curler."
"What the… why?"
"Do you think all this just happens? We don't live in a world of miracles my friend."
"Why do you have skin colored lipstick?"
"It's concealer. Don't twist it all up!"
"What are you concealing?"
"The dark circles of motherhood."
"You don't have any of those."
"That means it's working… Austin, don't stick your finger in my blush."
"That's what she said."
"Pregnancy makes you infantile."
"Hey, I see what you did there."
"Oh my word," she chuckled, shaking her head. "You sometimes make me feel young."
"Hey, it's not like play-doh is my favorite part of the day."
"I'm laughing inside."
"What is that?"
"Austin, you're not this clueless. This is eyeshadow."
"It's not bright blue. It threw me for a second."
"This is also not 1975."
"Good to know. Two colors of eyeshadow?"
"I'm tying you down and giving you a makeover, I swear."
"Danny would kill you."
"I wouldn't touch your hair, I promise."
"You're gonna have to catch me first, Montana."
"Ew, that sounded weird coming outta your mouth."
"Yeah. Never again, huh?"
"No, thanks. So do you know what we're doing tonight?"
"Yewp."
"And what am I going to have to do to get you to tell me?"
Austin shrugged and whisked the blush brush over her face then looked in the mirror and wrinkled her nose.
"Kill me."
"So once you're dead you'll tell me?"
"Yeah. Just rest in the fact that Adam and I planned this night together so you know it's gotta be good."
"You two together are even worse than me and you together."
"What's life without a little danger?"
"Iowa."
"Well played Ross. Well played."
"Thanks. Can I have that back?"
"You don't need no more make-up."
"Yes I do."
"Do not. And I think everyone would agree with me."
"Austin Grace Messer, don't you dare-"
"Hey do you guys think Lindsay needs more make-up?" she shouted into the other room.
"No!"
"See?"
"Austin, relinquish the cosmetics."
"Fine, but only because it's your birthday."
She handed everything over then picked up the straightener.
"What's this?"
"It's hot."
"But what's it- OW that's hot!"
"I told you!"
"It should have a big red flashing sign on it."
"Would that have stopped you?"
"No but I would have complained less. What do you do with this?"
"Various forms of medieval torture. Come on, you've seen a hair straightener before."
"Curling iron, yes. This… to do the opposite? No. And why do you need this, your hair is already straight."
"To achieve the perfect feather flip."
"Feminism is lost on me."
"It's okay. I love you anyway."
"Thought so. Are you almost done? I want dinner."
"Five minutes, less."
"Okay."
"Hey, don't let me forget, I have a pair of your jeans."
"What?"
"I don't know. They appeared a while ago. I thought they were mine at first but I put them on and they were dragging on the ground. I kept wearing them though."
"How did they even… why are my pants here?"
"I don't know. Remind me to give them back to you so we can correct this weirdness."
"That'll be good. "Hey Linds, don't forget to give me my pants back." I wonder what awkward situation I'll blurt that out in."
"Probably one that will turn into a great story to tell the kids someday."
"As all our stories are. Hey, you're pretty enough, lets go."
"But the-"
"Move it."
Austin pushed her out of the bathroom and flipped the light off.
"Mama go bye?" Colton asked, throwing himself against Lindsay's legs.
"Yeah. You want to stay here and play?"
"No."
"But Isa's going to be here. She needs someone to play with."
He sighed and looked into the other room where Isa was quite happy with one of his toys. He watched her for a minute, then hollered and ran in there, taking the toy out of her hand and turning it the other way so she was using it right. She growled at him and took the toy back and he stomped his foot before walking away and finding something else.
"Non sibling rivalry," Austin muttered. "I wonder how long that's going to last."
"I'm placing my bets on a really long time."
"So they're gonna be like this the rest of the night?" Flack asked, suddenly regretting his offer to babysit.
"Probably not. They have taken up wrestling lately though. Isa usually wins."
"That's because she bites."
"She's scrappy, what can I say?"
Lindsay chuckled and rolled her eyes while Adam tossed her a jacket.
"We're going to be late if you don't get moving."
"Me? You don't even have shoes on."
"Because you're wearing mine."
"I thought I said you were going to have to deal with it. And since when do you only have one pair of shoes? You have more shoes than I do."
"Linds, don't tell people that!" he said, jamming his feet into another pair of shoes without untying them. "What will they think?"
"That you're very, very gay of course."
"Watch out RuPaul," Danny added.
"You guys suck."
"Let's go, I'm going to wither away and die from starvation."
"All hail the queen of the hyperbole," Lindsay said, kissing Colton goodbye. "Good luck tonight guys."
"I'll be fine," Jess said with a grin. "It's this guy I'm worried about."
"I'm not that great with poop and drool!"
"That's goin' on your tombstone, Duck."
"Where did you guys get this idea?" Lindsay asked, raising her eyebrows as Adam handed her a laser tag vest.
"We're just cool like that," he responded.
"That and Google," Austin added, adjusting the straps on her vest.
"Can you play laser tag pregnant?"
"Dude, I play Cops and Robbers pregnant."
"True."
"Hey Linds, I'm really glad somethin' like this appeals to you," Danny said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "It's not every day I get to run around and shoot at my wife."
"Um… you're welcome?"
"So how do you wanna do this? Boys versus girls?"
"Now wait a minute Adam, that puts you on my team and ensures that we'll lose."
"I play video games! You have no idea how good I am at Goldeneye."
"Yeah, you should see him standin' there painting the toilets on paintball mode," Lindsay offered.
"Alright, I'll take him. But that don't mean I won't sacrifice him if I gotta."
"Sounds fair," Adam agreed, testing out the trigger on his gun. "Good luck girls. You're gonna need it."
"Whatever," they chorused as the lights went down and the countdown started. They all scattered, feeling like high schoolers as they ducked behind walls and crates, wondering who was going to be the first to shoot, but knowing it was probably going to be Austin.
"Danny I hate you!" she hollered, missing him completely as he dropped to the floor and rolled behind a barrel.
"Austin now he knows where you are!"
"And now he knows where you are too, Einstein," she hissed, stooping down and shuffling across the floor, joining Lindsay behind a large crate.
"Then why'd you come over here?"
"I don't know. I don't have adrenaline because this isn't real, so I'm not really sure what to do here."
"We might have done a bad job of choosing teams."
"Watch your mouth."
Lindsay chuckled and took a quick peek around the crate, making out the silhouette of Adam's shoe before scrambling to a place where she could get a better shot.
"Missed!" he shouted victoriously. She wrinkled her nose and crawled back into a corner, hearing the guys start shuffling around, apparently trying to flush them out. They were much worse at whispering than she and Austin were.
"I thought I knew where they were."
"I thought I did too. Can a pregnant woman even more that fast?"
"She's not that pregnant, Danny. You can't even tell. It's not like she's waddling."
"Don't remind me about the waddling, the hormones come with it."
"Sorry man."
"Talkin' about us like we're not here," Austin grumbled as she made her way through the darkness. "And excuse me, but hormones? Danny's a wuss."
"I bet the girls went out for coffee," Danny sighed.
"Do you know how much they spend every time they do that?"
"Do I wanna know?"
"Just the coffee is bad enough, but I found a receipt in Lindsay's purse and it had pastries on it."
"We gotta do something about this, man."
They were standing about five feet away from the girls now, and Lindsay was trying hard to stifle her giggles. Austin smacked her arm and slowly looked around the corner.
"They're right there!" she mouthed. Lindsay snorted a laugh and would have fallen to the floor had she not already been laying on it.
A laser blast came out of the darkness and nailed her while Austin rolled away.
"Save yourself!" Lindsay shrieked with a giggle.
Austin laughed and inadvertently gave up her hiding spot. Danny took the chance and shot her and soon both girls were laying on the ground giggling.
"We both shot our wives, wanna get a beer?"
"Yeah."
"Hey, you gotta help your dead wives off the floor," Lindsay said.
"Alright, alright. Another round?"
"You boys ain't gonna know what hit ya."
Lindsay stretched and yawned, throwing back the covers and climbing into bed. After the four rounds of laser tag, in which they had come out tied, they spent over an hour in the arcade. She'd laughed the whole time, so much that her aim was off in the hunting games, causing Danny to tease her unmercifully. Of course, once he found out that she and Austin also stunk at skee-ball, his insults had gotten even better. It had been a really good night, but she was exhausted and couldn't wait to turn the light off and close her eyes.
"Hey sweetie, you can't go to sleep yet," Adam said, flopping down beside her.
"It's my birthday, I can do whatever I want."
"Well in an hour it's not your birthday anymore so I'm going to wake you up."
"You win," she said, sitting up. He grabbed her waist and pulled her into his lap handing her the small gift he had so hastily wrapped before.
"Adam…"
"What?"
"I thought we said we weren't going to do birthday presents anymore."
"Well I lied. Open it, I'm really proud of this one."
She grinned and spent a few seconds looking for a spot to start opening.
"Uh babe?"
"Yeah, I was thinkin' this might happen," he said, grabbing his keys off the nightstand. She took them and managed to get the box unwrapped. It was a plain jewelry box, but not the normal velvet. She turned it over a few times before cracking it open and finding an oval locket. It was silver and the filigree was similar to her ring.
"Adam, it's… it's beautiful. Where did you get this?"
"I never reveal my secrets. Look inside."
She opened the locket and found a picture of Colton on one side, and one of their family pictures on the other. A small tear sprung to her eye as she ran her finger over the pictures, then turned and looked at him.
"I love it."
"I thought you might."
"Thank you. It's perfect. You're perfect."
He brushed her hair back and kissed her softly, pressing his forehead to hers and nuzzling her nose gently.
"You are the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me. I love every moment with you, the good and the bad, because you're the one that's standing beside me. I am so glad I have you and I can't imagine what life would be like without you."
"You'll never have to know."
"I love you, baby. Happy birthday."