A/N: I've been wanting to write this chapter FOREVER and could never make it happen because I had no idea where to put it or how to pull it off. And then I was like "Screw it, I'm writing it anyway!"
"Why, oh why did we all agree to this?" Austin muttered shaking her head and watching Jo and Lindsay dance around the bathroom.
"Because it'll be fun," Jo answered, stopping her movements for a second to apply her lipstick. "Because you need to get out of the apartment."
"Because there's a chance that someone is going to do something completely embarrassing before the night is over and will preface it with the words "I don't want to see this on Facebook in the morning." And most likely that will be Flack."
"See now there's a reason I can get behind," Austin chuckled, watching as her best friend flipped a cowboy hat in the air and caught it on her head. "You can take the girl outta Montana…"
"That's what they say," Lindsay drawled, adjusting the sleeves on her flannel shirt.
"Linds, why do you get an accent when Montana does not boast an accent?"
"I dunno," she replied. Of course it came out more like "own't know" but Austin knew what she meant anyway. "You gonna let us teach you to line dance?"
"Over Danny's dead body."
"You're a bad sport. Please Aust?"
"No way. I'm a dancing spaz. There's no way I could do a line dance."
"Even if we teach you the Tush Push?"
"Excuse me?"
"It's a real thing," Lindsay assured. "Of course there's a lot less tush in it than the name warrants."
"No, I am pretty sure I'll have just as much fun sitting back watching the two of you make fools of yourselves."
"Sorry, I grew up in a pool hall. This old girl may be an old girl, but I can still slap some leather."
"What she said," Lindsay agreed, clicking her boots on the tile floor.
"Aren't you worried that Adam's gonna disown you after tonight?"
"Nah, between me and Hannah he's used to this behavior."
Austin chuckled and shook her head, willing to spend the evening out at some honky tonk even though it wasn't in her element. Besides Lindsay and Jo it wasn't anyone else's either but that didn't mean it wasn't going to be fun. She was mostly looking forward to Mac's reaction. He'd probably nurse one whiskey on the rocks the whole night and grin and shake his head a lot.
"Hey mom can I-" Ellie began, poking her head in the room. "Oh dear heavens."
"What?"
"Why do you look like Shania Twain?"
"What'sa matter with that?"
"Nothing if you didn't look like her in the Whose Bed Have Your Boots Been Under video. And that came out in 1995."
Austin snorted.
"I'm proud that you know that Ells."
"How much Aquanet did you use mom?"
"Enough," Jo chuckled, pinching Ellie's cheek. "Gotta look the part."
"Of a 1970's cheerleader?"
"Elliana…"
Ellie giggled and reached up to adjust Jo's necklace.
"Well anyway, can I go over to Lauren's house?"
"Don't wanna be home alone?"
"Not really."
"Yeah, you can go. Gonna spend the night?"
"Probably. Tyler's taking me out for breakfast in the morning."
"Spoiled."
"I'm his favorite sister."
"Yeah, yeah. Get outta here, Sass," Jo chuckled, kissing her daughter's cheek.
"Night mom. Night girls."
"Night Ellie."
"Are all girls like that?" Austin asked, once they heard the front door close.
"Like what?"
"Perfect."
"I would hope so but I'm pretty sure I just got lucky."
"I hope I get that lucky."
"Don't worry. Parenthood is the most fun you've ever had. Even in the bad times."
Austin nodded, enjoying the little bit of mom-to-mom advice, especially from someone who had been through it already.
"Well girls, I think it's high time we get out of here."
"I'm glad we convinced Hawkes to come. He always skips out on these evenings of bonding," Lindsay said as Jo turned the light off and they made their way to the door.
"Yeah, I think he's just more mature than the rest of us."
"Even Mac?"
"Mac just goes to make sure none of us do anything stupid."
"Which we usually do."
"Flack after one amaretto sour."
"'Nuff said."
Jo chuckled and shook her head, tossing Lindsay her keys.
"Speaking of drinking, designated driver."
"Designated music chooser."
"Great, it's gonna be country all the way there," Austin groaned. "As if I'm not gonna get enough tonight anyway."
"You like Sugarland."
"You said you wouldn't tell anyone."
"Jo's not anyone."
"Thanks, Lindsay."
"I just say what I think," she teased with a grin. "Come on, the boys are gonna leave if we keep them waiting too long."
"I kinda wish I hadn't found a babysitter," Austin groaned, following them to the elevator.
"Austin, just remember you're doing this for me. And you love me, right?"
"Sometimes more than right now."
"But you love me and that's all that matters."
"I don't know what to do with you and that's what keeps me around."
Lindsay chuckled while Jo shook her head.
"I don't get you guys."
"Neither do we," they chorused with a giggle as they approached the car and got in.
"You need to bring the seat forward?" Jo asked while Lindsay glared at her.
"Shut it, Danville."
"Consider it shut. The button is on the armrest."
Lindsay grimaced but pushed the button anyway, waiting until the seat moved forward enough that she would reach the pedals, then turned around and smacked Austin's leg for laughing.
"Alright, let's get outta here."
"See now how do they do that?" Danny asked, pointing to the dancers on the floor. "It's like Riverdance with worse music."
"It's not that hard. Just two Dorothy's, four heels-"
"That's enough, Montana, don't pull me over to the dark side."
"We have pork rinds," Jo teased, stealing her drink back from Mac. "Believe it or not, I do actually like a shot of Jack to start."
"I'm surprised you still have a stomach. You sure that's just Jack in there?"
"You're too sober for this conversation."
"And it ain't gonna get any worse. Dude can hold his liquor."
"Don't call me dude, Don."
"You're one of us tonight Mac. Loosen up. Let your hair down."
"But don't squat with your spurs on."
"I am pretty sure that won't be a problem."
"Okay, okay, it's about that time," Jess said, putting her glass of whiskey down on the table. "Tradition folks. Hands up."
Grinning they all stuck five fingers up in the air.
"I've never…made out in a church building."
Danny and Austin each put one finger down, then looked at each other and burst into giggles.
"I've never… spent the night in a canoe in the middle of the lake," Flack said.
"Geez, are you tryna make us lose?" Austin asked, putting a second finger down.
"Yes."
"I've never… sang karaoke," Mac offered. His were always so mundane and he never lost at this game either. It never stopped them from playing it though.
Everyone groaned and put one finger down.
"We're changing that tonight," Jo said with a nod. "I've never… stolen a car."
Everyone kept fingers up, except Lindsay who dropped a finger and her head.
"Lindsay Ross, shut the front door, you have not stolen a car!" Austin shouted, amusedly enraged that she didn't already know about this.
"I so did."
"Darling," Adam began, clearing his throat. "Why did I not know that you committed grand theft auto?"
"Because. I was young!"
"How young?"
"I was fourteen and it was my idea and I got my cousin Scott to drive and it was his dad's car."
"Doesn't count if it was a family member," Danny said with a shake of his head.
"Does it count if we got arrested?"
"It does now," Mac laughed. "Please explain your sealed juvenile record."
"My uncle had just gotten this T-Bird and it was all restored and shiny and I convinced Scott that we should take it for a spin. So we pushed it to the end of the driveway and started it up and he was going like twelve miles an hour down the road and I told him to drive it like he stole it and he said "We did steal it, Stupid!" and I said that I wasn't the one drivin' and he got mad because it was my idea and we were still arguing when the cop pulled us over half an hour later. Now if it had been any other cop in town he woulda just let us go, but no, it was the sheriff who also happens to be our other uncle and who had just gotten a call that the car had been stolen, so he cuffed us, threw us in the back of the squad car, drove us to the station and called grandma to come and get us, and thus ends the most laughed about story to ever pass around the family dinner table."
"Linds, I am so proud of you right now I could cry," Austin said.
"I'm glad you approve. Hey look, Hawkes is here."
"Doc!" Danny and Flack greeted.
"Norm!" everyone else chimed in, scooting around to make room for Hawkes and his date. They all knew he had been seeing someone, but this was the first time he had brought her around.
"Guys, this is Willow Graham," he said, his eyes shining as her name came out of his mouth. He introduced her around and she almost immediately meshed into the group, laughing with them as they forgot their game and moved on to telling stories on each other instead. There was a lot of name calling and poking, and general childishness, but that was what they all needed in the wake of their professions.
"Linds, you think your hips can handle this one?" Jo asked as a new song started.
"I think they can but that don't mean I'm goin' out there."
"Don't get all shy now. Just think of the sound of your boots on the floor."
Lindsay sighed and let Jo pull her out to the floor where they joined in the quick line dance, both of them loosening up in a few seconds as the steps came back to them. Boots slapped against the wood floor as they moved their feet in better rhythm then they ever did when chasing suspects. They both used their hips and shoulders to put a little more oomph into the dance and ended up staying on the floor for one more song before giggling and making their way back to the table.
"Now I know why you had to wear the big belt buckle," Austin said, draining her glass.
"It's the look."
"No, you gotta have somewhere to put your hands so you don't smack no one when you're spinnin' around all like that."
"Aust, you're drunk."
"I ain't drunk, I'm slurrin'."
"It'll make it easier to get her onto the floor later," Jo shrugged. Lindsay tipped her head in agreement while the karaoke portion of the night started up.
"So it's okay for us to sit here and mock, right?" Danny asked as the first singer took the stage and showcased her lack of skills in the vocal department.
"You just gotta make sure her boyfriend ain't overhearin' ya," Jo said with a shrug, her accent getting deeper from the alcohol.
"Watch it there, Mississippi girl, you gone start thinkin' y'all home again."
"Lindsay, what did you just say?" Adam chuckled.
"I think I might be contact drunk," she said, rubbing her eyes and smiling at him. He raised and eyebrow and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pressing a kiss to her temple.
"You look happy," he noted.
"So do you."
"Those dance moves are nice."
She snorted and leaned closer to hug him.
"Major dork."
"I can live with that."
By the end of the evening everyone was giggling together at everything. They had been so close to getting Mac up onstage with the guys to cure his own "I've never" but at the last minute he changed his mind, preferring to sit back and watch the boys croon an old Conway Twitty song. Austin and Jess had both given the mechanical bull a try, and had done pretty well for first timers. They'd tried to convince Lindsay to do it, but her story about riding the real thing had stopped that train before it left the station. They'd managed to pull Austin onto the dance floor when the DJ threw Flo-Rida's "Low" into the dance mix. She wasn't as spastic as she claimed she was, but it was enough to send her butt straight to the floor.
Now it was nearly last call and couples were out on the floor, slow dancing in the blue lights. Mac and Jo had elected to stay at the table, with the excuse that this was a couples dance, but no one was really fooled when they saw Mac's hand snaked across the back of Jo's chair.
"Adam, you see that?" Lindsay whispered, taking the lead and turning them so he could look.
"Yeah."
"Thoughts?"
"Cool?"
"Sometimes I forget you're not a girl," she sighed. He chuckled and danced them a little closer to Austin and Danny.
"You saw it too?" Austin asked with a grin.
"That's kinda bold for Mac, don't you think?"
"Not as bold as that crafty little lean back she's got goin' on," Danny mentioned, dipping Austin so she could look.
"That's real live flirting right there, kiddies," Jess announced as she and Flack joined the little group.
"Stop lookin' at 'em or they're gonna stop givin' us somethin' to look at," Adam whispered as if anyone else could hear him anyway.
"We used to say the same thing about you two," Austin scoffed.
"Oh whatever, you did not," Lindsay said with a roll of her eyes.
"We did too, didn't we Danny?"
"Sure did."
"I think we're being teased, honey."
"Don't worry about it, they're drunk."
"You guys were bickerin' and you missed it," Flack chuckled, shaking his head.
"Missed what?"
"I'm not tellin' ya."
"Donald Flack," Austin warned, showing him her fist. "I know what you sound like when you scream."
"You think I don't got nothin' on you Grace?"
She glared and put her fist down while Lindsay put hers up.
"Well you don't got nothin' on me Flack."
"Eh, the moment's gone. Guess you're just gonna have to keep your eyes peeled."
She glared at him before Adam gave her a little spin.
"Now, now, I'm sure it's no reason to be actin' like third graders."
"Shut up dear," Lindsay giggled, just as last call was sounded over the bar.
"We should get outta this place. Who knows what we're gonna run into in the parking lot."
"A mountain of a man with a Born To Kill tattoo," Lindsay said, nodding.
"I hope not," Danny chuckled.
They gathered up their things and each other and made their way out of the bar, Jo stumbling on the sidewalk and Mac catching her before she lost her balance.
"How much Jack did you have?"
"Either too much or not enough," she chuckled.
"Lindsay, are you driving her home?"
"Yeah, seems so."
"Good luck with that."
"I appreciate it. Hey Adam, don't forget to make people pay for gas seven or eight times before you take them home, okay?"
"I won't. I'll see you at home hon. Drive safe."
They shared a quick kiss before she got into Jo's car and looked over at her friend.
"You can't be that drunk."
"It's the frivolity."
"You were just fake trippin' back there now weren't you?"
"No, that was real. I'm clumsy enough without alcohol. What are you lookin' at me like that for, Ross?"
"No, nothin'."
"You're as bad as Ellie."
"Thanks."
"Mac wasn't kidding when he said working here is like running a daycare."
"Says the woman who started a peanut fight with Jess."
"She had it comin'. Hey, tell me a story."
"What?" Lindsay asked, pulling the car out into traffic and being grateful once again that Adam had a full car of drunks to take home while she only had Jo.
"A story. Any story."
"What, like the three little pigs?"
"No. Like a real story."
"That could be a real story, you don't know."
"Tell me about yours and Adam's first date."
"Our first date?" Lindsay echoed with a grin. It wasn't that she never thought about it, but she'd never told anyone about it simply because it made her all swoony and the one time she had tried she'd been mercilessly mocked for being such a girl.
"It wasn't much," she started with a shrug. "I guess it was because we'd done stuff together before that it almost didn't seem like a real date. He did bring me some ugly fake flowers, and said it was because no one else had ever brought me something like that."
"You still have them?"
"Of course I do. They're not sitting out anywhere; I put them in my hope chest. But I could never get rid of them."
"Then what did you do?"
"We went for a walk. Stopped and got hot dogs and pretzels and went into the park because there was a concert there. It was one of those nights when old barbershop quartets and stuff will get up and do a half hour set. You know what I mean."
"Yeah."
"So we ate and talked and sat there and… it was really nice. I remember, my heart started beating really fast when he touched me. That had never happened to me before. And then at one point he reached over and he was playing with my hair. It's funny, he still does that. Colton does it too. I never realized that before."
"You're so in love. Seems like you were even back then."
"Maybe I was a little. It was like from that moment when we decided to try dating… it just made so much sense. I'd never felt so right before."
"What did you do after the park?"
"He walked me home. Really, really slow. And we stood outside my building for like fifteen minutes. And I could tell he wanted to kiss me and he was just working up the courage, you know? He just kept up the conversation as if we didn't both know what was coming. And he was doing that rambling stuttering thing, which is weird because he'd never done that around me before. But I thought it was cute and I was giggling about it and I grabbed his hand and then… all the sudden it was the best kiss of my life."
"Wow, that good on a first kiss when you're all nervous and trying to remember how to do it?"
"He knows what he's doing. I didn't have to do much thinking, lemme tell ya."
"That's a good story," Jo said, leaning her head back on the seat.
"Yeah, it is, isn't it?" Lindsay agreed with a wistful chuckle. "I love him."
"Obviously. I guess I had the different perspective of not seeing it all from the beginning, but you guys are so… stable. I guess I look at every relationship wondering how long it will last. I'm a little cynical. But you and Adam, Austin and Danny… I genuinely believe you're all going to make it."
"I am pretty sure there would be torches and pitchforks if we didn't."
"You're exactly right," Jo chuckled as they pulled into her parking garage. "You'd better hurry up and get home to that man."
"I think he would agree."
"Thanks for helpin' me convince everyone to get in touch with their hillbilly bone tonight."
"Anytime. We should do it more often. Next time we're definitely getting Mac to sing."
"Oh absolutely. I'll even dig out the video camera."