Marinette's mind was reeling. It had been reeling for weeks, and she had almost no one to talk to about it. There was Tikki, but it wasn't enough. Tikki was supportive and kind, and gave genuine advice, but somehow, it wasn't what Marinette wanted at the moment. She desperately wanted to talk to Alya to get a second opinion, but she couldn't. She couldn't talk to anyone. She could tell anyone how she kind of, sort of, maybe, perhaps, had a little, tiny, itty bitty crush on Chat Noir.
Her heart was pounding at the thought that she could have liked her partner the way she did, though in all fairness, he did flirt wither a lot. Not to mention all of his visits to Marinette. It would have been harder not to fall for him.
But what really made things difficult was her unending feelings for her classmate, Adrien.
She had to calm down. She had to think this through. Freaking out and panicking wouldn't help her now. She… she could make a list.
It wasn't wrong to like Chat, was it? He was awfully kind to her, and terribly caring. As her partner, he was someone she could trust, and someone who has, on several occasions, saved her life. There was no one better for her.
As her friend, Chat was fun and caring. He was playful and made her feel at ease, despite the fact that she was hiding her identity from him. Would she able to continue to do that if they dated? Would he even consider Marinette's feelings if he was so devoted to Ladybug? Would she be forced to reveal her identity if she wanted to date him? Would they have to date in secret for the rest of their lives? What happened after secondary school?
Ladybug had been opening up to Chat Noir lately. Perhaps Marinette wouldn't even be on his radar. Then again, he had never called her after… never mind.
And then there was Adrien. She still loved him, that much she was certain of. Just looking at the posters on her wall made her heart race. But never had he ever shown any signs of liking her anymore than he would've liked another friend. She was just his friend. Nothing more, nothing less. While they were getting closer as friends, what was she supposed to do with a relationship that would never come to fruition?
A tap came from the trapdoor above her bed. Marinette had been expecting him. It wasn't that she had planned to invite him over in the middle of her state of panic, but he often came at this time. She climbed up to her bed and released the latch, letting her friend in. He was stood with a rose in his mouth. A crooked smiled spread across her cheeks at the sight of him.
"What are you doing Chat Noir?" she asked.
"Trying to woo the princess of course," he replied simply, winking and taking the rose from his mouth to offer her. She rolled her eyes histrionically, but welcomed the gift.
"Ah yes, why hadn't I thought of that?"
"Is it working?" Chat raised an eyebrow and let mischief fill his eyes. Marinette's heartrate couldn't handle that expression.
"Did you really want it to work?" she asked, only half joking with him now. He never responded. The cat took hold of Marinette's free hand and bowed down to give it a slow and deliberate peck. When he looked back up, she knew there was no way to hide the blush that shrouded her face. He smiled a small smile, and Marinette only just captured the tint of pink that peaked from the edges of his mask.
Neither of them spoke of the atmosphere that had transpired for the rest of his visit. In fact, they acted as if nothing had happened. It was easier that way. Sort of. It was easier on her heart, not so much her brain. It was easier not to talk about it. It was easier to pretend that she wasn't crushing on one of her best friends. It was easier to talk about nothing and laugh and play and ignore their feelings. Because to acknowledge them meant opening up a whole different chapter of events. And neither of them were ready for that.
At the end of the day, Marinette had no idea who her heart belonged to, but a part of her was willing to wait and see who in her mind would be able to capture it once and for all.