A/N: I can only apologise for the amount of time this has taken me. Call it a hiberation for the Harry Potter muses. Thank you to Classic Cowboy for the beta :)

Chapter Thirty Nine

The effect was instantaneous; Lady V's crimson eyes widened, then rolled back. Her legs folded beneath her, and she collapsed to the floor of her cell, unconscious.

Sirius' heart felt like it was jumping around inside his chest, but reason restrained his limbs from unlocking the door and letting her out. It still might not be her. And if it was, he didn't have a clue what to do next. The ultimate aim had been getting rid of Lady V, he hadn't allowed himself to think any further. And now that had been achieved—if he wanted to, he could go back to running and let the others deal with helping Helena conquer this … disease once and for all. He got to the door before two things stopped him. One: the sure knowledge that if, having abandoned her now, he came back later, he'd get only one thing from Helena. Which would be a punch in the face. And two: … in sickness and in health—this definitely counted as sickness. And if they ever did marry, those words would be part of the vow they would make to each other, he thought, pulling the ring out of his pocket and looking at it. Then Sirius decided that he didn't need the circle of metal of the paper certificate. He'd make the vow here, now. She was sick, so he would care for her. It was that simple.

So that was why, when Helena opened her wonderfully blue eyes, the first person she saw was the man who loved her.

Her bed was cold. And a bit wet. And more than a bit hard. And felt a lot like stone, in fact. When she opened her eyes, she met Sirius' concerned grey ones. Which were upside down. And which were peering at her through … bars.

"Hellfire?"

"Padfoot, why am I …" she trailed off. She had meant to ask 'Why am I on the floor?', but it wasn't just a floor, it was the floor of a cell. A cell in the apparent dungeons of Westmoreland Castle, she guessed. In mute shock and incomprehension, she stared up at Sirius for an answer.

He only breathed a long, long sigh of relief. Why he would be relieved- "Exceptionally long story. Do you remember any of it?"

"What am I supposed to be remembering?"

"The last week or so."

"I've been in a cell for a week? Who locked me up?"

"Well … we did."

The dumbness came back.

"We'll get you out though, as soon as possible. Just let me get Dumbledore. I'll be back, Hellfire. Don't go anywhere."

"How could I?" she called after him.

She clambered to her feet slowly, feeling lightheaded and dizzy. It was only after she'd straightened that she realised what she was wearing. Black robes that she was pretty sure she didn't own, but that were tailored perfectly to her figure. They also had a hood. And her wand was missing. Quickly checking Sirius wasn't coming back, she rolled her sleeve up and looked at the Dark Mark. It was quiescent, glowering quietly on her skin. But it made sense that it was the source of her current predicament—had she been put under a spell? Drunk a potion? God, had she done something terrible?

Footsteps approached, quiet and calm, unaccompanied. Dumbledore came in, his light blue eyes missing their usual twinkle.

"Did I kill someone?" Helena asked.

"Yes."

Hearing the answer she dreaded, Helena set her jaw and forced the next word out. "Who?"

It couldn't have been James, or Remus or Pete, Sirius would never have been able to talk to her, look at her if she had, but Lily- God, not Lily, not Lily and the baby, it couldn't have been-

"Sandra Shore. The auror."

It was a bizarre relief to hear, but then immediately a puzzle again. "But she died in Azkaban, when the Death Eaters attacked. You're telling me I was there?"

"Unfortunately."

"Was I under the Imperius Curse?"

"No," he replied heavily. "It's rather worse than that, Helena."

"I don't understand."

"I know. Come upstairs, and I will explain it to you. Your friends are eager to see you."

"Dumbledore, if I've killed someone then I can't go and socialise!" she cried. "I-I don't know how or why—I can't see people, whether they're my friends or anyone else! If the Dark Lord's controlling me then they're all in danger!"

"You are not a danger to them. And in any case that is why your wand has been removed. You need to see them, Helena. You need to see that you are not a pariah to them."

With that, he removed his wand and pointed it at the lock of the cell; it opened and Helena stepped out hesitantly. "Why-"

"Everything will be explained to you, Helena, I give you my word."

"When?"

"Presently."

She still felt incredibly nervous when she followed him into the hall. It was like a horrible repetition of the Sorting Ceremony, everyone staring at her, and she was filled with inward trembling. It seemed like she needn't have worried through. James and Lily both met her with tight hugs, and Remus clasped her hands—even McGonagall patted her on the shoulder. The only one who didn't touch her was Pete, who only smiled nervously.

"It-it's really nice to see you, Helena. Um- Yeah, really good. But I've got to go, really sorry. Something at my mum's I need to take a look at. I'll see you later, everyone!"

He practically ran to the fireplace, and flooed away. No one was surprised or interested in his fear. It was clear they were all as uncertain as she was though, all going a bit too far to make her feel welcome. The only person who wasn't too cheerful was Sirius. He stood looking grim and determined, waiting for the truth to come out. Needing security and comfort, she went to him, and he wrapped her tightly in his arms.

"It's going to be alright, Helena," he breathed in her ear. "I promise. I'm here, and I'll never leave you again."

Remembering in a sudden rush the last time she had seen him (as far as she knew), and the most painful—in every sense—sex of her life, Helena found tears springing to her eyes, and she clung to him tightly. After another moment or two, she felt brave enough to look back at Dumbledore.

"Now will you tell me?"

She was silent as it was all explained, laid out in horrifying detail. Strangely, it wasn't difficult to believe Lady V had sprung out of her own desires. She remembered what being around Voldemort was like, how darkly thrilling it was, how intoxicating the sense of power had been. The idea that, when she had cut it off, part of her wasn't prepared to let it go, made complete sense. And she was fierce, possessive even, over her relationship with Sirius. He was hers. That, coupled with the freedom that total amorality brought, probably would be enough to justify attacking an innocent woman in so savage a way.

But those desires and demons were absent from her now. She felt as much revulsion towards them as her friends did. They weren't part of her, they were a part of her. So she was with Sirius.

"How the hell do I get her out?"

"It isn't that simple, my dear," McGonagall said. "Unfortunately there's no potion or spell that will help here."

"Then what will?" Helena asked desperately.

"Time. And help."

"Whose help?"

"Mine," Sirius said immediately, squeezing her hand, which he had yet to let go of. "However long it takes."

"That's noble, Padfoot, but you're not anywhere near qualified to deal with psychological problems like Helena's," Lily said. "There are muggle psychologists who would, but we can hardly get them involved. I've never heard of this kind of thing happening with witches or wizards."

"We don't necessarily need to use muggles, and we can't assume my case is applicable to normal multiple personality disorder anyway," Helena said, focusing on the problem. She felt better when she could apply useful knowledge to problems. "It's me we need to work on, not her. We need to go carefully through every instance where I buried what I felt or wanted to do in fear. Doing that obviously built up so high that it needed to find another point of release. If I force myself to accept that everything she is just already in me—or the potential for it is—then it should remove the need for another personality."

"Being away from You-Know-Who should help too," Lily said. "That thing on your arm isn't just a summoning device, it's a powerful bit of magic. It could very well be exacerbating the problem."

"So it's conceivable that Voldemort shaped Lady V," Helena nodded. "I told him I'd leave or he'd kill me … I suppose helping to create another me does circumvent that particular problem."

"Ordinarily I'd just suggest getting that tattoo removed, but somehow I don't think that would work."

"Probably not. But removing you somewhere far away from him could well weaken the hold and make it easier to reconcile you and Lady V. Especially if he doesn't know where to find you," James said.

"I imagine he'll still try to summon me though," Helena said, shuddering at the memory of that pain. "And when I resist it, that's when Lady V comes out."

"Which is when I stop her, from here on out," Sirius put in, his tone brooking no refusal.

She tried anyway. "Too dangerous. From what you've told me she's easily more powerful than you, maybe even as powerful as Voldemort is."

"I'm not exactly a weakling myself, and she won't have a wand."

"What if she takes yours?"

"I won't let her."

"Sirius, I can't let you risk your safety like this, I love you too much to-"

"And I love you too much to let any more of you be swallowed up by that evil bitch, so there's no point in arguing, Helena, there just isn't," he said.

Against those burning eyes, she finally submitted. "Fine. But promise me you won't take any unnecessary risks? If I look like I'm about to kill you, then for God's sake get out. Promise?"

"I won't take any unnecessary risks," he said, which she didn't miss wasn't a promise in any shape or form. But equally she wasn't going to get anywhere by pushing him now.

"Fine. Where will we go? And how are we supposed to hide from him?" She turned to all her friends, determined expression on her face. "He'll do anything he has to, we all know that. Anyone who knows is immediately in danger of intimidation, torture and death—that means all of you are putting your lives at stake just by being in the same room as me. I've no choice but to let Sirius, but the rest of you, no way."

"Helena, we're putting our lives at stake just by being in the Order, so don't give us that," James replied. "However, other than that you're right. Personally I've felt the Crutiatus Curse and I'm not in a hurry to feel it again—and I'm not sure I could resist it forever."

"Then we need to think about secrecy spells."

"There's the Fidelus Charm," Remus suggested. "If you choose someone who You-Know-Who would never target as your Secret Keeper then it should make things safe. Ish, anyway."

Helena nodded. "And an anti-apparition spell should stop her from disapparating. Me, I mean."

"I also have somewhere you could go, I think."

"Where?"

"There's a holiday cottage in Ireland where my parents took me as a young child. We haven't been there in decades, not since…" he trailed off, and they were all left to imagine exactly what had happened there. "But it's pretty remote, on the coast, without another inhabited structure for at least twenty miles."

"Thank you," Helena said.

"Okay, that takes care of the where, what about the who?" Lily asked. "I'm more than willing to be your Secret Keeper-"

"I'm not," James frowned.

"In any case, I think it might be safer if Minerva or I acted as the Secret Keeper," Dumbledore said.

"Professor?" Sirius asked McGonagall. "Would you-?"

She nodded firmly. "Of course." She conjured a quill and some parchment from thin air, then held them out to Moony. "Remus, you will need to write the name of the cottage down here, and its location, as exact as you can make it."

He did so, then handed both back to McGonagall. "We should go now," Sirius said.

"Now? But we need clothes and things from home before we just run off to Ireland for Heaven knows how long!"

"Those can be arranged to be brought to you. We need to get you far away from anywhere as soon as possible," McGonagall said.

"A-alright."

"Do you need me to show you the way?" Moony asked.

"No, I think a full address and post code will be sufficient to find it," McGonagall said, a touch of dry humour in her voice.

There were a few more preparations to be made. Anti-apparition spells laid on the cottage, a trace placed on Helena just in case things did go wrong. Dumbledore still had her wand, and that night she agreed to go back in her cell, for everyone else's protection.

Sirius took her down to the dungeons. "Do you want me to stay with you?"

She shook her head firmly. "If Lady V comes out, there'd be no way to protect yourself. She'd kill you."

"Don't know about that. I could be on the list of good breeding stock."

She frowned. "Don't even joke about that, Padfoot, please. If this doesn't work that could well be true."

"It will work."

"How can you be sure?" she whispered. "I'm half-monster now, what if all this does is make me go the full way?"

"It won't. I won't let that happen, I promise."

She snorted. "Do you even know what a promise like that entails?"

He didn't reply, but the stoniness that came into his grey eyes spoke that he knew the truth. If there was no other way to stop it, she would have to be killed.

"Will you do it?" she asked. "Please?"

He stopped, horror draining his handsome features. "How can you even ask me that? Hellfire, do you think I could ever-"

"Yes," she said quickly, "because you have to. Lily's too optimistic, and she would never believe it was hopeless. James couldn't inflict that sort of pain on you. And there's no one else-" He moved past her, then slammed the door shut. Helena reached through the bars and grabbed his arm. "There is no one else I trust absolutely."

"I am not going to put you down like an animal, Helena!"

"You won't be," she argued back. "You'll be freeing me! Look, if it comes to that, then I'm dead already. Everything that makes me, everything that loves you is gone. And you have to stop the bitch that'll be walking around in my body. Because that will be her desecrating my tombstone. And I know you hate that idea as much as I do." She swallowed a sob. "Please."

There was a fire blazing in his eyes now, though he clearly still couldn't speak. All he did was take her hand between both of his, and kiss it hard. Then he turned on his heel and marched away. Helena blew another kiss after him. Thank God. She wouldn't be trapped in some dark corner of her own mind. That night, and for the first time she could ever remember, Helena prayed. Not for herself—she was pretty bloody sure that this wasn't going to work—but for Sirius, and the hope that he'd find the strength he needed.

Her sleep was full of nightmares. She couldn't remember the last time it hadn't been dreamless, but now that she knew about Lady V, her dreams were invaded by an influx of images and screams. She saw herself being tortured, herself being the torturer, saw Voldemort in every shadow, saw him taunt her, saw Lily dead, James dead, their unborn child squalling and wailing as it was torn from its mother, Sirius with his flesh flayed from his bones, the black dog being kicked and beaten by her own booted feet-

Helena had never been gladder to see a dawn in her entire life. Lady V, it seemed, was happy enough to plague her dreams. For now, at least, Lily came down with breakfast in one hand and her wand in the other. Helena was waiting for her with what she hoped was a relaxed smile.

"It's me, Lily."

"How are you feeling?"

"Hungry. And a bit like shit."

Lily unlocked the door and handed her the plastic cup of tea and paper bag she'd brought with her. "It's a sausage roll. Not particularly healthy, but I thought you'd want something hot after spending the night in here."

"Lily, you are an angel," Helena sighed, taking a long drink of the tea despite its scalding temperature.

"I try. Um, by the way, is there anything you want from home? I don't know how long you'll be in- in thingy, you know, um ..."

Helena frowned. "Are you alright, Lily?"

She nodded. "Dumbledore must've cast the Fidelis Charm. McGonagall is the Secret-Keeper now. I can't remember where you're staying."

"Well, that's good I suppose. Hopefully Padfoot will."

"I'm sure he will. What did you say to him, by the way? As far as I know he hasn't slept at all."

"I …" She couldn't tell Lily, couldn't face the look of indignation and stubborn refusal. "It doesn't matter. Is he still in the great hall?"

"Yeah. Come on."

They were all there, all the Marauders assembled, even Wormtail. Apparently someone had convinced him it was relatively safe. He still looked as though he'd rather be elsewhere though. Sirius said nothing when they arrived, only took her hand and looked at Dumbledore, who was holding a broken clock. "Everything is ready," he said. "This Portkey will get you there, and the Fidelus Charm has been cast."

Helena smiled at James, who gave a reassuring nod in return. Her smile faded as Dumbledore came forwards with her wand, too. "I think the last thing I need is to be armed, Dumbledore."

"You cannot be afraid of your own magic, Helena. That way more madness lies, not less."

"I'm afraid of her magic, not mine."

"Her magic is yours. You have cast Unforgivable Curses, you lust for power and dominion over others," Dumbledore said firmly.

"Of course I don't!"

"Some part of you does, Helena! It is vital that you grasp this, if you are ever to recover. Find those darker elements in your soul. Explore them. And then embrace them as your own. Then, and only then, can you learn to deny them successfully. And only then can 'Lady V' be destroyed."

"Alright," she swallowed, "but give my wand to Sirius. This isn't something I'll need magic for anyway. I don't want to run the risk of hurting anyone until I'm cured."

"Very well. Take hold of the Portkey."

They both did so, and the others stepped back. "Take care of yourselves," Lily said, looking as though she was struggling not to cry.

"And you."

"And, uh, good luck," Peter squeaked.

Then there was a jerk behind her navel, and she and Sirius were pitched forwards into thin air. They landed on a stoneflagged floor, Irish sunlight streaming in through the window. Helena climbed to her feet with as cheerful a smile as she could muster. "Well. Let the healing begin!"

A/N: Review please!