Author's Note: Thank you for the reviews. Here's the next chapter. Please let me know what you think.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
The more Evelyn has considered her symptoms, the more she is leaning towards the conclusion she is going through menopause instead of suffering from cancer. It is a relief to have an explanation that doesn't result in illness or death, but she is still perplexed by her symptoms. All of the women she's ever known who have openly talked about menopause, most of them have complained about hot flashes and moodiness. She has been a bit moodier than usual but nothing extreme. She isn't experiencing hot flashes, instead she is plagued by nausea and dizziness. She spent a great deal of time the night before in bed researching menopause on her phone, many of the websites listing symptoms similar to the ones she's experiencing. She has decided to continue her research exploring treatments for her symptoms.
Evelyn sits on the sofa in the study scrolling through a website promoting herbs and tea to treat symptoms. It is all she can do not to roll her eyes because if she begins experiencing any of the symptoms that have been listed on other sites she will need a tranquilizer. She clicks on another website and is reading about hormone therapy when Adrian enters the room. He stops in the doorway of the study, a surprised look on his face as his eyes land on Evelyn.
"You're home and Reverend Boyfriend isn't around?" Adrian isn't sure which one is more surprising. Evelyn ignores him, her silence only increasing his desire to bug her. "What are you reading?" He asks coming to perch on the arm of the sofa. Evelyn looks up from her phone, narrowing her eyes. She knows he won't leave her alone if she continues to ignore him, but she also isn't required to share personal information with him any longer.
"Nothing important, just how to murder your spouse and get away with it." Evelyn shrugs then smirks when Adrian narrows his eyes trying to discern if she is serious or not.
"If I only knew you were joking," he mumbles, unsure of whether to believe his wife or not.
"I guess we'll just have to wait and see." Evelyn offers him a smile then stands from the sofa and leaves the study.
The staff at Doctor Greely's office are terrified of Evelyn which makes it incredibly easy for her to obtain an appointment at just a moment's notice. Her menacing presence in the office expedites the waiting process, the nurses have a room ready for her once she arrived. Unfortunately, once she is behind the closed door of the exam room all the menacing looks and death glares do not acquire the desired results. Doctor Greely makes her wait for nearly half an hour before entering the exam room. After nearly two decades of treating Evelyn, Doctor Greely is immune to her sharp tongue so Evelyn doesn't even bother complaining about the wait. Instead, Evelyn explains to the doctor her symptoms and what she believes to be the cause. While Doctor Greely agrees menopause isn't out of the realm of possibilities, she chooses to run blood tests before throwing prescriptions Evelyn's way. Evelyn is not at all thrilled by this course of action but knows the doctor wants to be thorough. Doctor Greely's attention to detail and meticulousness is why Evelyn has remained a patient of hers for so long.
The nurse enters to collect blood a few minutes after the doctor exits. Evelyn is not fond of needles but if these tests will allow her to finally receive some relief from the nausea and dizziness she has been experiencing, she will gladly allow it. The nurse instructs her to make a fist as she looks for a vein then urges Evelyn to relax once she finds the vein. Evelyn turns her head to stare at the hideous painting of azaleas on the wall, wincing when the needle pierces her skin. The nurse assures her the worst part is over. Evelyn turns to the woman to glare, her attention caught by the vial as it fills with blood. She realizes immediately it is a mistake because her stomach drops and the room begins to spin. The nurse asks if she is all right, Evelyn manages a strangled 'yes' before turning back around to look at the picture. She takes a few deep breaths and swallows, relieved when the nausea and dizziness pass.
The nurse notices Evelyn's pallor when she looks at her arm but after years of being a nurse, has seen a lot of patients nearly faint at the sight of their own blood. The red head appears to be fine now that she isn't looking at the vial so the nurse removes the needle once the vial is filled then applies a band aid to Evelyn's arm. She motions to the stack of magazines in the rack on a nearby cabinet while telling Evelyn they should have the results in a few minutes. The nurse exits before Evelyn can respond, the woman narrowing her eyes at the thought of waiting.
In the forty-five minutes Evelyn sits in the waiting room shivering since she is only wearing a paper gown, she exchanges texts with James. He is pleased to hear she has finally decided to see a doctor, and though she hasn't shared with him what she thinks is plaguing her, she is glad she can allay his worry if only slightly. Once they have said all they can via text, Evelyn turns to the magazines. None of them are appealing, but between dying of boredom or reading an article on how to turn a jar into a lamp, Evelyn decides to read the magazine. When she can no longer tolerate the thought of one more mind numbing minute of reading about do-it-yourself projects, she begins pacing the room. The movement helps her fight the chill but all it really does is irritate her. She does not like being kept waiting especially when it is for test results that she already knows what say.
Doctor Greely knew she would spend part of her day counting to ten, or ten thousand depending on how overbearing Evelyn chose to be. What Doctor Greely did not expect was the results she received from the woman's blood test. The results were surprising to say the least, and to make sure there were no errors, Doctor Greely had the nurse run the test again. She practically had to shove the young man out of her office to perform the test again as he went on and on about how unhappy Mrs. Powell would be if she was kept waiting. The doctor assured him she did not care then sent him on his way. The results did not change but Doctor Greely still feels better having rerun the test. She inhales and knocks lightly on the exam room door, bracing herself for the red head's reaction.
"Finally," Evelyn huffs as Doctor Greely enters the exam room. The doctor ignores her, taking a seat on the stool across from Evelyn. "So, what lovely menopause drugs are going to prescribe me?" Evelyn asks sitting up straighter and clasping her hands in front of her.
"I'm not giving you any medication for menopause," Doctor Greely says crossing her legs in front of her. Evelyn cuts a questioning look at the woman.
"Why not?" She practically whines, wanting nothing but relief from these symptoms. "You haven't turned into one of those new age hippies that thinks everything should be treated with herbs, have you?" If this is the case Evelyn is going to require a new doctor immediately.
"I believe herbs and other holistic practices can be beneficial, but I also believe we should take full advantage of modern medicine."
"Then why won't you give me drugs?" Evelyn demands standing from her the exam table.
"Please, have a seat." Doctor Greely motions to the exam table.
"Oh God, it's not menopause!" Evelyn sits back on the bed not to follow the doctor's instructions but because her legs feel weak. Doctor Greely nods only worsening the sinking feeling in Evelyn's stomach. "Is it cancer?" She almost sobs, horrified by the thought.
"No." Doctor Greely doesn't want to worry her patient.
"Then what is it?" Evelyn is relieved it isn't cancer but she can't think of anything else to explain how she has been feeling.
"Evelyn, you're pregnant," Doctor Greely offers Evelyn a slight smile trying to gage her reaction.
For a moment Evelyn sits silently with her brow furrowed. She sees the doctor's mouth move, she hears the words and is even reminded of Genvieve suggesting pregnancy, but for some reason she can't quite wrap her mind around it. The word 'pregnant' doesn't belong anywhere near her name; that ship sailed long ago. Still, she remembers the occasional bouts of nausea she experienced when she was pregnant with Barrett and the occasional lightheadedness she felt. Even though she's experienced nausea and dizziness much more in the past week or so than she did the entire nine months with Barrett, the symptoms are very reminiscent of how she felt during her pregnancy. Evelyn scoffs realizing she is actually entertaining this notion then looks at the doctor.
"Did my husband put you up to this?" Evelyn asks, unsure as to why she's blaming Adrian for the doctor's obvious misdiagnosis, but Adrian usually is to blame so why not?
"No one has 'put me up to this'." Doctor Greely doesn't appreciate the implication that anyone can convince her to meddle with her patients, but she understands Evelyn is trying to make sense of this.
"Then your test is wrong. Run it again!" Evelyn is wide eyed as she speaks, shaking her head to dissuade the doctor from this ludicrous notion.
"Evelyn," Doctor Greely begins calmly, sitting on the edge of her seat. She leans over and places her hand on Evelyn's knee. "You are pregnant; I ran the test twice." Doctor Greely hopes to assure her the tests are accurate but Evelyn is going to take more persuading than that.
"I cannot be pregnant. Two different doctors, both highly respected in their profession, told me that due to the scar tissue from my cesarean with Barrett I would never conceive a child again. Not to mention, Adrian and I haven't used contraception even once in all that time and I've never gotten pregnant."
Evelyn continues to shake her head, tears beginning to sting her eyes. For so many years, even before Barrett died, Evelyn dreamed of having another baby but it wasn't to be. Now, she is being told after all of these years, after all the heartache she has endured since her son's death, and even after attempting to adopt a child so she can once again be a mother, she is pregnant. Part of her wants more than anything to believe the doctor and the test results, but she can't. To believe, if only for a second that one of her greatest wishes is coming true, to only have it ripped away the next, is more than she can bare.
"Doctors are wrong from time to time, and this is one of those times. I ran the test twice and from the date of your last menstrual cycle, I would say you're somewhere between eight and ten weeks pregnant." Doctor Greely can see the pain and fear in Evelyn's eyes, but this is happening and the sooner she realizes it the sooner they can begin prenatal care.
"If," Evelyn sighs finding it harder to speak than just a second ago. "If, and that's a huge if, I am….." Evelyn pauses trying to force herself to say the word. "Pregnant," she manages barely above a whisper, "then I'm eight weeks along."
"You are pregnant," Doctor Greely reiterates then offers her a smile. "It's good to know how far along you think you are, but if it's all right with you, I would like to order a sonogram just to get a better idea of the gestational age." She doubts Evelyn will put up much of a fight since the woman is just sitting there but she still asks.
"Um, that's fine," Evelyn answers dismissively.
Evelyn waves away the doctor then begins to massage her forehead. This can't be happening. She is divorcing Adrian. They haven't had sex, except for that one time in the limo, in months, and even if they had been sleeping together regularly, after all these years Evelyn finds it implausible that she is pregnant. The doctor insists she is, apparently the results have come back with the same conclusion twice, so she must be. If she is though, then that brings about a whole new set of worries. She is much older than she was with her first pregnancy and with age comes greater risk. The fetus could be born with deformities or other abnormalities, or she could miscarry. She could also give birth to a perfectly healthy baby in a few months only to have it taken away from her in some horrific manner like Barrett had been. Evelyn knows she could not survive that indescribable pain again. Adrian also couldn't survive any of those scenarios. Evelyn groans at the thought of Adrian. He will never agree to a divorce once he knows she is carrying his child, but she won't keep it from him. After everything they have been through, all the pain brought about by their son's death, Adrian deserves to know that he has a child on the way. As to how he will react, Evelyn isn't so sure. This pregnancy brings with it so many questions about the future, but already Evelyn knows she wants this child more than anything else.
"Are you all right?" Doctor Greely asks placing a hand on Evelyn's arm. Evelyn jolts at the contact, so caught up in her thoughts she hasn't realized Doctor Greely has reentered the room wheeling in the sonogram machine.
"I will be," Evelyn tells her, hoping it's the truth. There are many uncertainties right now, but the one thing Evelyn is certain of, is that if everything goes well and she gives birth to a happy infant, she will be all right because she will once again be a mother.
Doctor Greely offers Evelyn a smile then begins preparing her for the sonogram. Evelyn tries to listen as the doctor talks but she can't focus on the words. There are too many thoughts going through her mind, but all of those thoughts stop when the doctor encourages her to look at the screen. Evelyn rolls her head so she can see the screen, any questions she had about the accuracy of the test leaving her because there on the screen is the proof that she is in fact pregnant.
Evelyn has stuffed the prescription for prenatal vitamins and the brochure on high risk pregnancy in her purse without much thought. The print out of the sonogram she holds in her hand, unable to take her eyes off of it as she boards the elevator. There are people on the elevator but her attention is focused solely on the picture. She remains in shock from the unexpected news; it all seems surreal. She is glad to know it isn't cancer and there is a reason for her symptoms, but there is still so much she needs to sort through. There are many emotions she doesn't even want to think about, but eventually she will have to. For now, she is going to enjoy this light feeling that has settled over her.
The sensation of the elevator coming to a stop causes a twinge of nausea to wash over Evelyn but luckily it doesn't last long. She follows the people out of the elevator her eyes still on the picture as she walks. She isn't paying attention to where she is going, the force of bumping into someone the only thing that stops her. She wasn't walking too fast so there isn't much force when she collides with the other person but there is still enough force to make her drop her purse.
"Evelyn, are you ok?" Genvieve asks resting a hand on Evelyn's arm to steady her. Evelyn looks surprised to see Genvieve.
"Genvieve, what are you doing here?" Evelyn really didn't expect to see anyone she knows. She isn't up to dealing with anyone right now.
"I have an appointment with Doctor Mills," Genvieve smiles at the thought of her plastic surgeon. Evelyn rolls her eyes.
"Oh, well, have fun." Evelyn quickly forgets the woman turning her attention to her purse and the scattered contents. Genvieve follows her gaze to the upturned purse.
"Here, let me help," Genvieve offers bending at the knee to retrieve the items.
"That really isn't necessary," Evelyn tells her as she too bends to gather the objects.
Genvieve ignores her as she reaches for a tube of lipstick. Evelyn sighs realizing there is no point in arguing and begins picking up the contents that are closer to her. Evelyn tosses her phone and wallet into the purse then looks at Genvieve, the brochure on high risk pregnancy clutched in her hand. Evelyn takes in a sharp breath bracing herself for Genvieve's comment but the woman doesn't say anything. She places the brochure, along with a few other items into the purse then stands. She offers her hand to Evelyn who begrudgingly accepts the assistance only because she feels slightly woozy from her crouched position.
"Thank you," she says swinging the purse over her shoulder. Genvieve gives her a devious little grin then holds out the sonogram picture. Evelyn's mouth drops open; she didn't realize Genvieve was holding that. "So, I guess pregnancy isn't impossible." This time Genvieve offers her a genuine smile.
"Please, Genvieve, I know I don't have a right to ask you to keep a confidence, but please, please do not say anything to anyone. This is unexpected and considering the current situation between Adrian an…" Evelyn begins, wrapping her hands around Genvieve's arm as she practically begs her.
"You don't have a right to ask me to keep a secret, but I won't say anything. Pregnancy is a personal, private matter that should only be announced when you're ready for others to know." Genvieve's reasonable response takes Evelyn aback but she is so thankful the woman feels this way. "As for your current situation, what about James?" Genvieve doesn't mean to ruin the excitement Evelyn is obviously experiencing, but it is something that requires consideration. Evelyn sighs heavily.
"I am not sure how James will react to this news, but he nor Adrian are my first priority." Evelyn has given very little thought to anyone but her unborn child since receiving the news. The men in her life better get used to this because this child is all that matters now.
"If you don't mind me asking, is everything all right with the baby?" Genvieve doesn't care to dwell on the men in Evelyn's lives, she is more concerned about the fetus.
"According to Doctor Greely everything is fine. The pregnancy is considered high risk due to my age, but as of right now everything is all right." Evelyn smiles at that, relieved to know for at least right now things are looking good.
"That's wonderful. Congratulations!" Genvieve pulls Evelyn into a hug, so excited for her friend. Evelyn isn't expecting the hug but she finds it oddly comforting for someone else to know about the pregnancy and be excited about the prospect of a baby.
Genvieve releases her from the hug then the two part ways. Genvieve must get to that appointment with Doctor Mills and Evelyn is anxious to get home where she can process this news. Exiting the building, the sonogram tucked carefully in her purse, Evelyn allows her hand to rest against her stomach, a smile tugging at her lips as she thinks about what it would be like to be a mother again.
Adrian just wants a few moments of peace and quiet. With Evelyn back in the house, and Reverend Boyfriend constantly under foot, the house, as big as it may be, is feeling a bit claustrophobic. To escape the house and the feelings that plague him as he watches his wife with another man, Adrian decided to visit the country club. There hadn't been a lot of people there lulling him into a false sense of noiseless peace. Unfortunately, Gail ruined the little solace he carved out for himself when she sat down at his table and once again threw herself at him. He excused himself and left, trying to phone Zoila. Their unexpected and rather odd friendship is becoming something he relies on more and more and at that time he wanted nothing more than a friend to talk with. She must have been busy because her phone went straight to voice mail. He left her a message and returned to the mansion. Once again he seeks solace in his own home, this time finding the house quiet. Maybe he can finally relax.
Entering the study, he is shocked to find Evelyn curled up on the sofa asleep, a familiar photo album resting beside her on the sofa. He takes a deep breath, holds his head high, and walks over to the sofa. He really expected Evelyn to be out with James or working at Marisol's, what he did not expect was to find her here with that album.
The album is turned to the page he always finds her staring lovingly at, even when their bright little boy was alive and causing mischief. On the page, there are two pictures. In the first Evelyn stands in front of a lavishly decorated Christmas tree holding a sonogram photo. Beside her Adrian has a goofy smile plastered across his face as he points at the picture. Evelyn's crazy aunt Sharon had insisted they allow her to take the photo and for some reason it is a favorite of Evelyn's.
The second photo again has the two of them in it, but instead of a tree behind them or a photo in Evelyn's hands, she holds a red faced infant just minutes old. Evelyn looks absolutely exhausted but incredibly beautiful. It wasn't even a full hour after Barrett was born that Adrian was begging for a family photo. Whether Evelyn had been too tired or too drugged to argue, she allowed him to take the photo. Just as the nurse pressed the button, Barrett began howling, the new parents focusing their full attention on their son.
Adrian blinks back tears once he pulls his gaze from the photos. IF only Barrett was still here, so many things would be different. Even if Evelyn and he had divorced, it wouldn't matter because their son would be there. Adrian shakes his head forcing himself not to go there. Barrett is dead, they are alive and well, and no amount of wishing will change that. Like he told Zoila once, maybe if he'd accepted this earlier, things would be different in his marriage.
Adrian walks over to the bar and pours himself a glass of bourbon, definitely needing some solitude now. With the glass at his lips he looks at Evelyn. From where he stands he can see the tear stains on her cheeks and even though she is asleep, she does not rest. Her brow is furrowed and she fidgets. He isn't sure what drove her to the study to that photo album, but he isn't surprised he's found her like this. So many times he has walked in and she's been curled up just like this, and like every other time, he pours her a glass of bourbon, places it on the coffee table, kisses her temple gently so he doesn't disturb her, then heads for the door.
The glass of bourbon, like always, is the first thing Evelyn sees when she opens her eyes. She really wishes she hadn't fallen asleep, that Adrian hadn't found her with the photo album, but hopefully he won't think too much of it. Sighing, Evelyn sits up, closes the album then carries it to the shelf where the other photo albums reside. Whether it was the cry or the nap, she feels a bit better. Her world has been turned upside down by this very unexpected news, and there are so many things that could go wrong, but for the moment she decides to just accept things as they are. There are other matters she needs to consider, most of which she is not looking forward to even thinking about but they must be dealt with.
Evelyn isn't sure when Adrian will be back and there is no telling where Carmen is, so she decides the best place to this thinking is her bedroom. The thoughts are already swirling in her mind as she makes her way up the stairs, and by the time she enters the bedroom, she is beginning to realize this pregnancy and the baby that might result from it, are probably the two simplest things to handle. It isn't until she is seated on the bed she allows herself to fully delve into all the problems she sees arising from the current situation.
Evelyn's first concern is of course her child. She is much older than she was with her first pregnancy and with age comes greater risk, lowering the chances of a smooth pregnancy and a healthy baby. The time is also dreadful since she has recently filed for divorce and has just started dating this wonderful new man. Even if she has to stay married to Adrian and give up James, she will because all she wants, all she's wanted for so long, is a child of her own. When Barrett was still alive and growing into an independent child who no longer wanted to be cuddled, Evelyn had dreamed of having another child. She dreamed of what Barrett would be like as a big brother and she knew he would be the best brother anyone could ask for. Another child wasn't a possibility but it has always been a fantasy of hers. Now, that fantasy has come true and she is looking forward to it, though cautious she might be. There are many things that could happen and instead of a baby to hold she will be left with heart ache. She is willing to take that risk because never in her life has she been happier than when she was a mother.
Shaking her head, Evelyn refuses to allow herself to wallow in 'what-ifs' or entertain all the horrible ways this pregnancy could end. There are many other things to consider right now, the main one is Adrian. He is the father; there is absolutely no doubt about that. Yes, she is working diligently to free herself from him, but even if she wasn't carrying his child, she knows they will always be connected. They share a son and all the years of grief since his death. This new child will be another connection between them.
Evelyn finds herself thinking about the wonderful father Adrian had been to Barrett. From the moment they brought their son home from the hospital to the moment he died, Adrian was always there for him. No matter what time of the day or how big the mess, he was always there for Barrett. Evelyn doesn't doubt for a second that he will be the same amazing father to this child. It's just that now things are so very different. With the divorce pending Evelyn is afraid Adrian will fight her for full custody of this child. Of course she will share custody with him, but if he sees a way to punish her he just might do it. Even if he doesn't sue for custody, she just can't picture a way to tell him, not when there is still uncertainty surrounding this pregnancy. Doctor Greely assures her everything should be fine if they monitor the pregnancy closely, but Evelyn is painfully aware of the fact that a child can be ripped away from you at any second.
Evelyn lies back on the bed covering her face with her hands. Whether she can picture it or not, she is going to have to tell Adrian. His presence in this child's life is a guarantee. James', however, isn't. She is aware of how selfish the thought is, but it's there anyway. Just as she is moving on with a kind, caring man, she finds herself attached to Adrian in yet another way. Of course she isn't going to do anything to change the situation; she wants this child more than anything else. Still, she is saddened at the thought of losing James. This isn't his child, besides, at his age, why would he want to deal with a baby if he doesn't have to? He has a full life with his church and helping others. Even if by some miracle he doesn't leave upon the news of a pregnancy, she knows Adrian will be the deal breaker. James has already encouraged her to get the hell away from him. She can't really do that with his child in tow.
These thoughts, plus countless others run on a loop through her mind. Doctor Greely instructed her to avoid stress as much as possible but these are stressors she can't avoid. Evelyn sighs and reaches into the bed side table, digging around for a moment until her fingers rest upon the sonogram print out. Just like with Barrett she can't make anything out of the blob pictured, yet supposedly technology has advanced. From the grainy photo in her hand she finds that rather questionable.
"What've you got there?" James asks from the doorway, startling Evelyn. She was so engrossed with her thoughts and the sonogram picture, she didn't hear him enter.
"Oh, uh…" Evelyn stumbles over her words trying to come up with something believable. "Family photo," she lies, quickly placing the picture back in the drawer. James stands in front of the bed giving her a questioning look.
"Ok," he drawls, obviously unsure of what is going on but he knows something is up. Evelyn picks up on his uncertainty and quickly stands from the bed. The room begins spinning due to her sudden movement but now that she knows what is causing these frequent, not to mention annoying, dizzy spells, she isn't worried. James, however, is. He is immediately by her side, his arm wrapping around her waist as he steadies her.
"I'm fine," she assures him.
"What did the doctor say?" James studies Evelyn's features, worried that she is still looking pale. Hopefully the doctor has given her a reason for her symptoms.
"Oh, it's just stress…..from the divorce," Evelyn says dismissively, standing up straight and taking a step away from him. She doesn't want to lie to him, but Adrian is the person who should know about this pregnancy first.
"That makes sense," James nods, caressing Evelyn's bare arm. He has seen firsthand how stress can negatively impact a person. Evelyn is just relieved he has bought her explanation. "Well, then I think you need an evening to relax, forget all about your stress." James smiles at her then wraps his arm around her waist pulling her closer.
"And just what do you have in mind?" She quirks her brow at him, knowing full well that smile is an indication of more than just dinner.
"Well, we could start with dinner," he says leaning in. "Then we can come back here and…" he trails off, placing a searing kiss to her lips. His tongue plunges into her mouth eliciting a low moan from her. "Sound good?" he asks breaking the kiss.
"Indeed," She answers in a husky voice. She then pulls him in for another kiss.