Red

A/n: I temporary colored my hair this past week when my sister and I had the house to ourselves. Our mother and other sister went on vacation out of the state, so while we were having fun, we decided to prank our mother. So I colored my hair a very dramatic color and will surprise our mother at the train station next week when she comes home. I cannot reveal what color it is yet. But let's just say… I'm glad my hair didn't make it turn green. This is a weird "family" themed funny short. I don't know if it works but it seemed funny enough to share. I truly believe Canada would do something like this if given the chance. Sorry for the "oc-ness" of both America and Canada. By the way, I have more short stories to go Along with the "assassin" themed short story. However I won't post them unless I have one review for the first one. It lets me know someone is interested and I didn't waste time posting. Same with the "vampire" themed ones. I had one person interested in "vampire" Canada so I will put that up when I have it done though. Remember, requests are accepted. Now enjoy this madness.

Warnings: Swearing. That is all. :)

America was seldom at a loss of words. He usually had an overabundance of them to say about just about anything. There were rare times that words failed him and he shifted from being the goofy, over dramatic, teenage acting nation to a very confused one, frowning and blinking rapidly. His mouth opened and closed a few times, brows drawn together as he frowned.

"Um… dude… What…?"

America scratched his head and adjusted his glasses a few times. Then he attempted to take a drink of his cup of coffee… only to realize that he had spit it out in his surprise moments ago. Most of it was a puddle on the ground, though some of it was on the other person. That is, Canada, his brother. He'd wiped most of it off and wrung out his plaid patterned over-shirt, though the white t-shirt under it was a lost cause. Instead he buttoned it up some to cover the large coffee colored spot.

"Dude… I'm tryin' to understand… I really am… but… dude, I have to ask… What the fuck?"

Canada grinned goofily. He tugged on a strand of his slightly wavy hair. He'd let it grow out a little, in an attempt at looking a little different than his brother. People tended to get them confused… as in confusing him for America, not the other way around. He couldn't blame them when they did it at a distance. They were virtually identical but their personalities couldn't be more different. America was loud; butting his head into everyone's business and tended to be rather prideful. Canada was quiet and tended to wait his turn. Sometimes he just faded into the background like a ghost. Well, he used to.

Canada had tried several times to be noticed, especially whenever Russia sat on him at meetings. He'd tried wearing different clothing. He'd tried being louder, though he was very soft spoken and that was a hard habit to break. Finally he'd even tried to imitate his brother… though that led to a punch to the nose and one hell of a confusion. It was best to just act himself, he'd found out. His friends didn't like it very much when he acted so out of character. Unfortunately it was his said friends that caused this situation.

"Whose bright idea was this?" America finally spit out.

"It was mine!" Canada scoffed.

Was that so hard to believe? Apparently yes, as America was looking at him incredulously.

"Then tell me, little bro, why you have pink hair?" America said.

"RED!" Canada corrected, voice rising only slightly in volume.

That was unimportant to America. Canada again tugged on a strand of hair. His hair was wheat colored, and that lightened the red color more than he had anticipated. He had streaks of red running through spots of his hair, some only the tips being visible. It wasn't… so bad. He knew coming over to America's house early was a bad idea. Canada's birthday was in a few days and America's a few days after that. This year his brother wanted to spend some time with him early, since he often got so excited about his own birthday that he forgot about Canada's. The problem was this: his friends had the same idea, just one day sooner.

"Look, I was drunk. REALLY drunk. Think of it this way: at least it isn't a tattoo." Canada reasoned.

America laughed.

"Yeah like last time?" he said.

Canada curled inward on himself, shoulders lifting as he ducked his head. America couldn't help but laugh loudly. Canada looked exactly like a sulking teenager! That was funny to him. Canada scowled and flicked him on the nose for his trouble.

"Focus. And no, not like last time. That was a fake rub on tattoo for kids. One you gladly replaced with a tattoo of your flag to "save me from embarrassment", remember?" Canada said.

America smiled fondly. He did remember. Then he shook his head, remembering the topic at hand.

"So dude, what happened?" America demanded.

Should he go get the camera? There was no way anyone would believe this story. But with a video confession… it would be priceless. His bro, Canada, admitting to acting like a party animal? Too bad he didn't have actual footage. He and his brother had a high tolerance to alcohol, contrary to some belief. But when they got drunk, well, all inhibitions were off.

"Well, Gilbert wanted to go out drinking. So he, Lovino and I did. Long story short, and more tequila what-cha-call-its than I think is healthy, we somehow stumbled into this woman who was a hairdresser. She thought we were so hilarious when we… erm, I demanded her help in dying my hair red… so that no one would mistake me for you… that she agreed. Lovino swears I kept ranting about some tattoo parlor not allowing me to get a tattoo… but I can't really remember that. I'm glad though… I mean, who takes a drunk person seriously in getting something permanent? Anyway, she did my hair and I passed out in her living room." Canada explained in a rush.

Canada put his hands on his hips and scowled as America rolled around the floor laughing. Honestly, he thought, how was that so funny? Canada put a foot on America's chest to prevent him from rolling around again.

"See! SEE! This is what you get for hanging out with PRUSSIA and ROMANO ITALY." America said in between laughs.

"Alfred F. Jones there is nothing wrong with my friends. They're not any worse than YOURS." Canada chimed in.

Canada frowned as America ignored him, still laughing.

"UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!" Canada "yelled".

America went silent, eyes at attention, look of worry crossing his face. His brother was truly getting annoyed.

"Yikes… full name time…" he muttered.

It was one thing to use their "play human" names. But his brother employed his full nation name, which in a sense was his "birth name" or "full name", as it were. Canada removed his foot, allowing America to stand up. He dusted himself off before returning to business.

"So yes, this is why my hair is like this. Don't worry; it's supposed to be temporary. The bottle said it will wash out… eventually. It's not like anyone really notices me anyway…" Canada said.

America snickered.

"I dunno… they might with that "red"." He said.

America moved his foot as Canada "passively" went to stomp his foot. Passive aggressive his ass! Clearly no one had gotten this far on his nerves to see this side of Canada. Canada pinched the bridge of his nose, wishing he had brought his bear… Kuma… whatever his name was. Maybe he could bribe the bear into chasing his brother around for a while. Probably not. The bear was more passive than he was during a meeting.

"Well, at least it's not just me." Canada said, making his way to America's kitchen to raid his fridge of his maple syrup.

America froze as those words sunk in. He ran to catch up to his brother, ready to demand an explanation. He watched as Canada grabbed the bottle of maple syrup, avoiding the sugary fake stuff and going for the real Vermont kind. He strode over to Alfred's coffee pot and poured himself a mug, taking the time to add some of the maple syrup to the stuff. After a large swig, he continued.

"Gilbert's hair is green and Lovino's is tipped in blue. It was an interesting party. Needless to say Gilbert is living up the joke. Lovino… well, I'd hate to be his brother or Spain right now." Canada said casually.

Canada watched as America mulled this over, snickering every so often. He'd admit it was pretty funny. Not nearly as funny as the idea that came to the three friends that morning after nursing a hangover. He couldn't wait until later. He'd have to get his duffel out of the rental car before they started in on America's beer. Canada grinned behind his cup, eyeing America's wheat colored hair. He wondered if America would still be laughing when he woke up tomorrow… with red, white and blue colored hair.

Oh yes. Definite win for Canada.

Ps- I like fan fictions where Romano and Canada are friends. Same with Prussia and Canada being friends. I wonder if America will actually like the red, white and blue hair… This may backfire, Canada.