The characters belong to Stephanie Meyer but the story is my own.

The chirping of the morning birds roused me from another dream about Dr. Cullen. A sigh escaped me as I rolled over and my wedding dress came into view. Today was my wedding day. It should be the most wonderful day of my life, next to the birth of my children, yet there was a pit beginning in my stomach. I stared at the simple dress that Mother had picked out for me. It was a vibrant white with lace over the arms and chest area. She had made sure that it was conservative, telling me that a virgin bride should never show any skin. Honestly, I hated it.

The dress that I had wanted had been sleeveless but that had been too scandalous. So here I was, stuck with a doily for a dress. A small giggle escaped me at the thought as I slipped from under the covers. The air was already warming even though the sun had only been up for an hour. Butterflies were already filling my stomach, threatening to become a flurry of hornets. I wanted nothing more than to run from this, but I had promised Charles I would marry him and I had to keep that promise.

At least that was the way that Mother put it. I had tried to inform her that I wanted to move out West and teach for a few years, but they would not hear it. Mother said that I was better off accepting a husband here, where I was close to home. Where I could safely start a family. I looked into the idea of leaving several times but with no money I had nowhere to go. So I finally let go when I was twenty, after working at a dress shop for two years to try and scrounge enough savings together. Yet the money never seemed to be enough. So I had finally gone to Mother and agreed.

Of course she had been planning behind my back, just waiting for me to come and tell her that I was willing to be married. She had found a young man, respectable in all ways and with an excellent job to boot. He had already purchased a house and was looking at buying a car next. At the age of twenty-six, Charles Evenson was the perfect match. In terms of looks, Charles was as handsome as they came. He had bright blue eyes with beautiful blond hair that he kept neatly trimmed. It wasn't nearly as beautifully blond as Dr. Cullen's but it was as close as I could dream of getting. He wore a simple beard, kept it short and clean. While I disliked a man with a beard, it had grown on me as we courted.

He was completely approved by Mother and Father so it did not come as a surprise when he asked me to marry him after only a few months of dating. At that point, I had had several suitors but none had been deemed husband material until Charles. So here I was, preparing to marry a man that I didn't love, just to make my family happy.

Mother had already drawn a bath and I could smell the rose water she had added from the doorway of my room. I had to take several steadying breaths before I found the courage to walk down the hall. I knew that the longer I stalled the more impatient Mother would get and that there was no way I could make her upset today.

I slipped off my nightdress and hung it up. I gently touched the water, finding that it had already cooled slightly. I slide in and made sure to wash as fast as I could, rinsing my hair with the pitcher of fresh water. I dried myself and hurried back to my room wrapped in nothing but the towel. Mother was already waiting in my room.

"Oh Esme I just knew that this day would come! I am so proud of my baby girl!" She grabbed my face with both hands and kissed me on both cheeks before pulling me into her arms. I tried to smile but the butterflies had long since turned to hornets and all I wanted to do was throw up. Why on earth was I feeling such fear at marrying this man?

"Yes Momma. Now let me dress!" I shooed her from the room and turned to survey the undergarments she had lain out on the bed.

With slight disgust, I slid into the lacy items, making sure to tighten the corset just enough so I could breathe properly. I wrapped myself in the white house coat that Mother had left then went downstairs where Mother had the hairdresser waiting.

I simply smiled at them as I took my seat, not interested in conversation. I declined all food but sipped a cup of tea while waiting for time to be alone yet again. It did not come.

There were four women in the house with my Mother and I. The hairdressers, Charles's mother, my best friend and Cousin, Ruth and the minister's wife. They were all in high spirits, shrieking and discussing everything from the flowers to my dress. None of them seemed to notice that I was not all there.

After my auburn hair had been placed in curls all around my head, Ruth weaved baby's breath around the front in a half crown. It was stunning. I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before following Mother up to my room. She sat on my bed and patted the spot next to her. I quickly sat, dreading the talk to come.

"I know that you are a grown young woman, but I look at you and see the little girl you once were. The rosy red cheeks from playing outside all hours of the day. The scraped knees from never listening and always climbing trees. Your broken leg. Oh that day scared me more than I dare ever tell you. Esme my darling, you are my pride and joy and I would be lying if I said that I wasn't a little sad that today had finally come." She took my hand in hers and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Now, tonight after the wedding you will be expected to perform your first wifely duty. You must be open and ready to accept his advances when they come. Do not turn away. While there will be no pleasure for you, remember that this is for him. Do not shy away. Do you understand?"

I nodded, feeling a blush creep into my cheeks at the very idea of….of….sex. There. I said it. Sex. I had no idea what it would feel like or be like but I knew that there was no choice.

"Now, now, Esme there is nothing to be embarrassed about! It is all a part of growing up and marrying!" She scolded me as she stood and slide the dress from the hanger. I stood and slipped off the housecoat, putting my arms in the air. She slipped it over them and my head and pulled it down. She gathered the strings and tied them at the back, pulling everything tighter but not too tight. She then gathered the veil and placed it on my head, sliding the clips into place.

"There now. You look stunning. Come now we must be at the Church shortly." She turned and left and I simply stood there, unable to move. I could hear everyone running around grabbing the last minute items that might be needed.

Well its time. I glanced around my room one last time. Goodbye Dr. Cullen. Today I become Mrs. Charles Evenson. With one final breath I lifted my skirt and slowly walked down the stairs. The oohs and ahhs brought a smile to my face and a small giggle escaped me. Ruth gave me one last hug before guiding me to the waiting car. Father had left this morning deeming this all too female for him. He had gotten the car all ready and was now waiting to drive us.

As soon as the car began to drive, a silence fell over everyone. I had taken Ruth's hand and was clutching it for dear life, hoping that she would calm me down. As soon as the Church came into view I felt my breath hitch in my throat. This was my last chance to turn around and call this off. Yet one look at my mother's face was all I needed to know that this was exactly what I should be doing.

"Are you ready baby girl?" Father held his hand out to me and helped me from the car. I had not even noticed that everyone else was already waiting to begin the ceremony.

"Yes Father." I gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and then slipped my arm through his.

The music began to flow from the church as Ruth entered the church, looking stunning in her pale blue dress and white rose bouquet. I kept taking small breaths as Father began to walk us both towards Charles. He looked incredibly handsome in his tux. I couldn't take my eyes off of him as I made my way towards him.

Father gently placed my hand in his, gave me a kiss on the forehead then went to his seat. The pastor cleared his throat and then raised his hands.

"Welcome one and all. We are gathered here today to join Esme Pratt and Charles Evenson in holy matrimony. Esme do you take Charles to be your husband, do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect him, forsaking all others and holding only unto him?"

"I do."

"Do you Charles take Esme to be your wife, do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect her, forsaking all others and holding only unto her?"

"I do."

"By the power vested in me I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."

Charles lifted the veil, smiling at the crowd as he did so, almost ignoring me. He only turned as he leaned in to kiss me, quickly before turning and waving to all those who had been invited. He took my hand and guided me down the aisle, stopping the greet people and accept congratulations.

While our families could not afford a large party, we were celebrating at the town hall with a few family and friends. Charles guided me to the car without saying a word, almost slamming the door behind me. He slide behind the wheel then turned to me.

"How does it feel to be Mrs. Charles Evenson?" He reached out and gently touched my cheek before turning back to the steering wheel.

"Wonderful." The lie slipped through my lips with incredible ease. I wondered what kind of marriage this would turn out to be.

…

The rest of the day flew by in celebration. I almost didn't want it to end but I knew that I had a new life to begin sooner rather than later. Mother had already packed my bag and placed it in the trunk before the party. Father promised to bring the presents by later this week, perhaps on Friday. I quickly kissed them goodbye and then sat myself into the car. Charles took a few more moments and then drove us back to the house.

He grabbed my bag and led me into the house. It was a beautiful two story home with light blue siding and white window shutters. The door was a lovely light yellow with roses growing in the flower boxes. He had done an amazing job in creating a very wonderful looking home. He led me into the entryway and set the suitcase down. The living room was small but had simple black couches. No ornaments of any kind not even a radio.

"Well the kitchen is down at the end of the hall. I, well we, have got indoor plumbing on this level only. The first door on the left. The bedroom is at the top of the stairs. Do you need some, um time?" I nodded and picked up my suitcase before entering the bathroom.

I locked the door behind me and leaned against it, feeling the panic rising to the surface yet again. I quickly pulled off the veil and clawed at the clips holding my hair into place. I slid from the dress and hung it up before turning on the taps to the tub. I made sure to turn the water to hot, needing to scrub off these feelings.

The undergarments were a bit of a struggle, so I settled with cutting the lace as it was quicker. I slid into the water and sunk down, submerging my head. I reached up with my hands and worked the hair spray out. I rose to the surface and sucked in a deep breath. I knew that I could only put off my so called duty. I towel dried my hair and opened the suitcase, pulling out a nightgown and housecoat. Once I was wrapped in fresh clothing I exited and headed for the bedroom.

With each step I could feel my legs growing heavier and heavier. Each step seemed to resound the fear that had been growing in the back of my mind all day. The time had come to make this official and I did not want to do this. Yet here I was. Becoming a wife and mother just as was expected of me. First step, consummating the marriage.

I entered the bedroom to find Charles already lying in the bed. I gave him a hesitant smile as I slipped off the housecoat and slid under the covers. He slid a hand onto my thigh sending shivers up and down my spine. The smile on his face was one of, I'm not really sure. He leaned over to kiss me and I allowed it to happen. As he hand began traveling upwards I sent myself into my mind.

It didn't take him very long to be finished. He seemed pleased which meant that I had done my job. He turned out the light and rolled over. It had hurt, but I made sure that I didn't show it because it was his pleasure that mattered. I slid down, buried my face into the pillow and allowed the tears that had been threatening, flow. This was my life and I had never been so unhappy. Nothing could be worse than this.