LEGEND OF THE GODDESSES
Clovenshire, 1,012 years ago
A tiny white stallion sat in a high window of Clovenshire castle, gazing out at the marble and mahogany interior of the throne room. He turned his pale blue eyes to the matching sapphire he wore on his bracelet.
"Little piece of bonus action for you," Fork said to the jewel. He flapped his red-and-purple insect wings and flew down toward the throne room floor.
Sitting in the middle of the room was a hot-pink winged unicorn, with a messy and somewhat ratty mane and tail striped blue, blue-green, white, and yellow. Her eyes were a shockingly pale shade of pink, she wore a platinum tiara, and her cutie mark was a golden crown with a six-pointed pink amethyst at its top.
This mare was staring intently at six enormous jewels, each a different color and cut into a different shape. There was a pale green dagger, larger than a pony's head; a white warhammer, a pink flame, a dark green lute, a brown bow with a matching arrow nocked, and a deep blue broadsword longer than three ponies standing in a line… and this pony was simply staring and staring and staring at them.
Fork flew over to her, and briefly found himself unable to tear his gaze away from the jewels. After hovering in place for a few seconds, he shook his head to clear it and addressed the mare. "Um… pardon me, miss, could you please tell me who you are?"
She looked up, barely; a slight lift of her head, while her eyes were still pointed downward at the giant jewels. Fork flinched, and his horn started sparking defensively, but she didn't make another move; she simply spoke in a powerful but deadpan voice.
"I… am Princess Amethyst Abjurer Dweomer, daughter of Platinum and sovereign ruler over all Equestria… but everypony calls me Princess Bubbles."
Fork snorted and giggled. "Ha ha! That's exactly what I hoped you'd say." He backed away from her and spoke to his sapphire. "Okay, this next part… I'm not stepping in. I want no part of it. But of course, I wouldn't make you miss it, so I'm just gonna watch. Hee hee!"
He vanished in an orb of powder-blue magic.
At the entrance to the throne room, a unicorn stallion peered in on Princess Bubbles. This individual, Prince Dragonglass, was stocky and white-furred, wearing a huge crown over his blue-green mane, with yellow eyes and a shiny black throwing star as his cutie mark.
"Look at her," he whispered. "She's amazing. Isn't she, Chancellor?"
He turned to his companion, a serpentine creature standing on its hind legs and leaning against the wall. Discord shrugged, his mismatched arms crossed over his chest. "Oh, I think you're a little bit misguided, Your Highness."
"Misguided?" the prince demanded.
Discord held up his hands calmly. "Hey, I'm your advisor, and that's what I advise. Don't shoot the messenger." He grinned. "I'm just doing my job. I really think your judgment is a bit cloudy on this one, sir. It's well-documented that Princess Bubbles is mad, and that she cares for nothing but the crown jewels. She would not make a good wife for you, Your Highness."
Dragonglass stared at Discord. "She's gorgeous," he stated plainly. "She's glorious. And I want her."
Discord sighed. "Sure, I see the appeal of an insane woman, the vulnerability of her brokenness and the desire to help her or whatever…"
"Exactly," said Dragonglass. "I want to take care of her."
"Very well, but is marriage really the way to do that?" Discord said exhaustedly.
"She'll be a fine wife once she's fixed up a bit," Dragonglass said wistfully. "I can make her whole again… with my love."
"She's also your cousin, sir," Discord said casually. "I know that seems like a silly reason not to marry somepony, but when you've seen as many generations as I have, you'll realize that keeping the bloodline 'pure' often results in some pretty wonky consequences down the road."
"But that's just it, don't you see?" Dragonglass said eagerly. "I'm the only relative she has in Equestria. The rest of the family stayed behind in the old country, since the Windigos were defeated and they felt there was no need to make the journey. If we have a child, born of the true sovereign and her only heir, that foal will have an absolute claim to the throne of Equestria. Nopony could ever take it from them. None will ever be able to stand against them or question their claims; they can rule with unprecedented ultimate security."
He bowed his head. "And I trust your judgment about the marriage of cousins. Please, advise our children of such a thing, so that their bloodline remains healthy and safe rather than pure… and none will ever have such a secure claim to the throne ever again. We'll make history."
"If your descendants share your listening skills, that order may be a bit of a lost cause, my prince," Discord mumbled.
Dragonglass laughed. "I'm sorry, Chancellor Discord. I know you only want what's best for me and for Equestria."
"I do," said Discord, smirking. "With all my heart."
"Just… please…" Dragonglass whispered frantically. "Tell me how I can win my cousin's heart, and I will never ask you to do anything objectionable ever again."
Discord pondered, scratching his chin, then smiled. "You know, I can believe that. As you wish, Your Highness. I happen to know of a… potion."
"A potion?"
"Yes, a love potion. You'll be utterly devoted to one another. You'll do anything, be anything, to mutually mold each other into the perfect partners you need."
"And how is this potion made?" the prince breathed.
"It's quite simple," said Discord. "A little something I myself concocted centuries ago, millennia even, in honor of a certain chaotic and primordial being who's sort of my 'one that got away'." He stared off blankly into space.
Prince Dragonglass tilted his head in concern. "Chancellor? Are you okay?"
Discord blinked, and was silent for a few more seconds, before speaking in a monotone. "'Take a tuft of cloud, a bright rainbow's glow. Stir with a pegasus feather, fast, not slow.'"
Dragonglass waited, looking surprised when he realized Discord was finished. "That's it?"
"Well, there's a third line—'Serve to two ponies who aren't in the know'—but you will be in the know, and that shouldn't change the outcome."
"That's the entire recipe?" Dragonglass marveled. "That's frighteningly easy to come by."
"Well, if you have a pegasus available, yes," Discord said flippantly. "If you don't, it's nearly impossible. Thankfully, we do have access to pegasi, so we shouldn't run into any problems."
"Excellent," the prince said gleefully. "When do we get started?"
"I'll start right now," said Discord, bowing down. "Don't concern yourself, sir; I will take care of everything." He started flying down the halls of the castle.
"Thank you, Chancellor Discord," the prince called. "I am forever in your debt."
Discord turned to him, bowing once again. "Think nothing of it, my prince. It's my pleasure."
-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-
Less than an hour later, Discord returned with two small cups full of a bubbling pink liquid. "It's readyyyy!" he sang. He presented the cup to Dragonglass, allowing him to smell it and get a good look at the heart-shaped bubbles.
"You both need to drink it," Discord explained, "and then you need to look into each other's eyes."
"Hmm, that may be a problem," the prince said in concern. "Cousin Bubbles never looks up from the crown jewels. Anypony who forces her to often pays with their life."
"Yes indeed, but you have no need to worry about that, my prince," Discord said graciously. "One look into your eyes after the potion has been consumed, and she'll quickly forget any murderous urges she may have had against you. She will belong to you, even as you will belong to her. We're talking about true love here. Mindless, reason-free, passionate, vomit-inducing true love."
Dragonglass raised an eyebrow. "Are you jaded about something, Chancellor Discord?" he said dryly.
Discord laughed in response. "Let's talk about you, not me. Go right ahead and share the drink with her. I'll be right here."
Dragonglass started into the throne room, then backpedaled suddenly. "You're not coming with me?"
"Oh, I'm not going anywhere near Princess Bubbles, sir. She scares the hell out of me."
They shared a laugh, then Discord quickly amended, "I'm dead serious, Your Highness. Please don't make me go in there with you."
The prince chuckled nervously and went forward, holding the two cups on top of one hoof. He tentatively came closer to Princess Bubbles; he momentarily glanced at the crown jewels, and that glance quickly became an extended gaze. It took him a few moments to recover, and refocus his attention back to the princess. "Hello, cousin," he said.
"Prince Dragonglass," she replied blankly. Pale pink electricity crackled around her eyes, and the prince stepped back in alarm.
"Um… dearest Princess Bubbles," he said, "it seems to have been a long time since you've had anything to eat or drink. I brewed something for you." He lifted the two glasses in his magic aura, which was the same hot-pink shade as Bubbles' coat.
She glanced at the cup he was offering her. Her eyes, which had been staring determinedly at the crown jewels, became glassy and unfocused as soon as she lifted them. She looked back at the jewels almost immediately, and took one of the cups in her own magic. The change in the color of the aura was subtle; hers was slightly paler than the prince's. Her magic squeezed the glass cup as if it was paper, bending it.
"To your health, cousin," said Dragonglass, lifting his cup. They both drank, and he positioned himself on the other side of the crown jewels from her, facing her directly. "Cousin… look at me," he said.
Still expressionless, her eyes glowed white and her horn lit up, aiming at him. "What did you just say to me?" she said in an emotionless voice.
"I said look at me, cousin," he whispered. "I beg you."
Her horn went absolutely wild with a massive surge of magic, preparing a concentrated beam, ready to shoot it at him. He tensed up, his teeth gritted, but he resisted the urge to close his eyes, knowing that his only hope was if, by some miracle, she looked up at him.
And so she did, turning her eyes upward for a fraction of a second. That was long enough; when the prince and princess made eye contact, they each went stiff, their eyes unblinking and swirling in shades of pink.
A moment later, their bodies relaxed and their eyes returned to normal, but they continued staring at each other. Bubbles stepped forward. When her path was blocked by the crown jewels, she put a hoof on them and slid them out of the way, never taking her eyes off of Dragonglass. They kissed tenderly, their eyes still wide open.
Discord slipped into the room, skidding across the floor. When his eyes caught the crown jewels, he was taken in by them, staring at them as he continued skidding, and for a few seconds after he stopped. At last, he shook his head rapidly, then smacked himself in the face before sidling up to the prince and princess.
"Hiiiiii, are you two doing all right?" he said sweetly.
"Why wouldn't I be all right?" said Bubbles, her voice still eerily blank. "I have a very special somepony."
"I have a very special somepony," Dragonglass echoed tenderly.
Discord cackled. "Yes, you do."
"I have a cuddly-wuddly, shiny happy snuggle bug," said Bubbles.
"I have a bubbly-wubbly funny sunny honey bunny," said Dragonglass.
Discord raised a curious eyebrow. "…Fascinating," he remarked. "I wonder if there's a way to counterbalance that in the recipe, prevent that particular side effect."
"You're my spritzy-witzy cutesy-wutesy tootsie flute," Bubbles deadpanned.
"You're my tickly-pickly squishy-wishy honey pie," Dragonglass cooed.
Discord shrugged. "Nah, I'll keep it, it's cute." He placed his eagle talon near their heads and snapped his fingers, then waved his hand in their faces. They didn't respond. He giggled wildly and darted out into the corridor. "Sickle Stick!" he called to a pony who was turning the corner, just getting out of sight. "Hey, Sickle Stick!"
The court scribe turned around and faced Discord. He was a black-coated unicorn with dark brown eyes; his curly black mane was brown at the roots, and his cutie mark was a yellow crescent moon. He wore half-circular glasses with white-gold rims.
"Yes, Chancellor Discord?" he said lazily as he approached.
"Something horrible has happened," Discord said delightedly. "A grievous tragedy has fallen upon our royals. Come see for yourself…"
He put his hands on the back of Sickle Stick's neck and pushed him into the throne room. Sickle Stick was at first captivated by the sight of the crown jewels, but he quickly noticed that Princess Bubbles was staring lovingly into the eyes of Prince Dragonglass rather than her usual hungry gaze directed at the jewels, and he realized the significance.
"What has happened here?" Sickle Stick whispered, using his lime-green magic aura to adjust his glasses.
"Well… you know that Prince Dragonglass has long held feelings for our princess. It would seem he has found a recipe for a love potion and brewed it for himself and our sovereign to share."
"A love potion?" Sickle Stick breathed.
"That was the intent," said Discord. "However, my diagnosis is that it was actually some form of love poison…"
"Love poison?" Sickle Stick demanded. "Is there such a thing?"
"Apparently," said Discord. "Just look at them."
"You're my icky-sticky kissy-issy pretty kitty," Dragonglass gushed.
"You're my sexy, naughty, pony-baloney flabby tabby," Bubbles mumbled.
Discord and Sickle Stick shuddered in unison. "Wow," Sickle Stick remarked.
"Eeyeah," said Discord.
"So, what can be done about this?" Sickle Stick said sharply.
"I'm not sure," said Discord. "I can't get them to look away from each other. It was always hard to get Princess Bubbles to lift her eyes on the best of days, and success often met with disaster… but now… they're so lost in each other's eyes that they may very well stand here until they starve to death."
"Is there a cure for this poison?" Sickle Stick fretted. "An antidote, perhaps?"
"There is," Discord said with disinterest.
"Is it available to us?"
"Sorry?"
"Is it possible for us to attain this antidote and cure them?" Sickle Stick said anxiously.
Discord grinned slowly. "No," he said darkly.
The blatant lie went over Sickle Stick's head, but he was still confused by Discord's tone.
"What I need now is your expertise on something, Sickle Stick," said Discord. "Petitions often circulate in the streets to have Princess Bubbles declared incompetent. And I'm wondering, whose job is that, to decide whether a royal is incompetent? Because… I feel that might be order."
"That sorrowful task would fall to the advisors to the crown," said Sickle Stick. "That is to say, you and I."
Discord nodded. "And so, if we assume that not only Princess Bubbles, but her cousin and heir as well, are trapped in the grip of this love poison with no cure in sight… that would be grounds for relieving them of their crowns, would it not?" He put a gentle hand on Sickle Stick's shoulder. "Are you willing to make that call with me, Sickle Stick?"
"…Yes," the scribe said reluctantly. "Clearly, they cannot perform their royal duties in this state. With a heavy heart, I shall have to make the statement that I find my princess and my prince to be unfit for duty."
"I'm sorry you ever had to make that decision, my friend," Discord said solemnly. "And it's with a similar sense of regret that I must agree with you. So, this decision presumably being rendered, here's my next question… Dragonglass was the one and only heir to the throne. The common pony on the street would have liked to see him as ruler. But with both of them incompetent… and their having no other family in Equestria… who is next in line?"
"Well, that would be… um… the kingdom's high chancellor," Sickle Stick said with dawning fear.
"…So, me," Discord said, grinning toothily.
Sickle Stick sighed. "Yes, Chancellor Discord, that would be you."
"I see," Discord mused. "So… I am, at this very moment, the king of Equestria."
"'Prince', actually," Sickle Stick corrected automatically. "Princess Platinum decreed that the rulers of Equestria should be princes and princesses instead of kings and queens, believing that ponies, and especially foals, have a tendency to associate kings and queens with evil."
"Yeah, yeah," Discord dismissed, "but for all intents and purposes, I am king?"
"Yes," Sickle Stick said cautiously. "I daresay you are."
Discord squealed in delight and started pacing around the prince and princess. "Well, my first decree is to dedicate today as a holiday, to be celebrated for centuries to come! Not a day dedicated to my rise, but to these two. Have it be a celebration of true love, or some such, a time to spend and enjoy with one's very special somepony. That is the lesson to take away, here, to stay positive—remember this day as a day for romance, not for the fall of a regime. Shouldn't you be writing this down, Sickle Stick?"
"Um… should I?" he said in alarm.
"I think you should," said Discord. "While you're at it, do me a favor and tell me what my name is now." He put a hand to his ear and leaned forward with anticipation.
"Prince Discord," Sickle Stick said reluctantly.
"Oh, that's nice! So… I wonder…"
Discord spread his arms and turned his gaze to the ceiling. A few seconds later, it started raining, right there in the throne room. The rain was dripping directly from the ceiling, and the droplets were red.
"Is…" Sickle Stick muttered. "Is this…?" He tasted the rain, and his eyes widened with horror. "Is this… blood?"
"Yes, my good man," Discord said softly, his eyes on the hypnotized, doting couple, who were still completely unresponsive as they got soaked in blood. "It is indeed."
He snapped his fingers over and over, creating wild explosions of confetti, tiny birds which darted in all directions, most of them smacking against the walls and windows, and splatters of tapioca pudding. The blood started staining him, and he began to grow larger.
"My power," he said in a booming voice. "It's been so long since I had a taste of it. I've been alive for over a million years, and do you know how much of that time I've spent with full access to my power? Minutes. Minutes within an age. Millennium after millennium I've lived, with no power at all, waiting for the day I could maneuver myself into this very position, to take up the mantle of a king so I could be rid of this curse, get my magic back, and feel my true emotions again! Oh, I have so many plans! So many things I want to try…"
He shed a single red tear, which expanded, beginning to soak his entire body with blood.
"I used to be an innocent creature," he lamented. "A wide-eyed child. But thousands of years of waiting and planning and longing for the magic to return… that can take the innocence away… can drive a soul mad… can obsess the soul with a singular desire… such as the desire to devour the world…"
He sobbed, so drenched in blood that it was continuously dripping from his body. He took a deep, calming breath, then abruptly jumped out the throne room window, shattering it.
Outside, the castle walls were golden and platinum, every one of its many spires tiled with stone tablets of jade and turquoise coloration. Discord flew high above the castle and the city, and raised his hands. Slowly, the castle's exterior started changing into black stone, from the bottom up. The swirling spires of the castle became flat parapets, while great steel spikes started poking out of the walls. With another flourish of his hands, red light started pouring from every window. The black castle fortress cast its immense shadow on the surrounding city.
Starting at a point directly above the castle's highest tower, the sky started turning black, and strange symbols and patterns started appearing in it: swirling spirals, spinning arrows, a pair of oscillating line segments bouncing a dot back and forth, and strange optical illusions that confounded the eyes.
Discord flew through the countryside of Equestria at the speed of sound, inches from the ground, his arms spread out and producing a constant stream of magic, which spread out in an ever-expanding wave behind him, magic seeping into the land, infecting it.
The ground became a patchwork of tundra, desert, rainforest, and other small pockets of climates which abruptly gave way to others. A field of grass turned pink and began growing at ridiculous speeds, reaching alarming height and thickness and beginning to overgrow surrounding trees and stones. Animals that Discord passed became deformed and twisted, and began babbling uncontrollably, in disconnected but oddly disturbing phrases. Huge chunks of earth were torn out of the ground and started floating away.
Suddenly, Discord tumbled to the ground, rolling head-over-heels in the dirt before coming to a halt with an undignified belly-flop that created a dust cloud. He hauled himself to his feet, grumbling, and found that he had to actually use his wings to get his feet to leave the ground, whereas he had been flying unpropelled before.
He turned around and noticed that at the very spot he had stumbled in the air, his chaotic and colorful landscape abruptly stopped, replaced by perfectly ordinary dirt and green grass, divided by a perfectly straight invisible line that ran from horizon to horizon.
Discord snapped his fingers, but nothing happened. He stepped over the border separating his creation from the ordinary land, and found that standing amidst the chaos he created, he was once again able to create magical explosions and hover unsupported. He stared in confusion at the dividing line.
"That's the border of Equestria," he realized. "So… not only did I have to become a king, but my powers only work when I'm within the borders of my kingdom?" He gritted his teeth and lowered his head, fists shaking in fury. "That's the way you played this, is it, Mother? So, no marching on Tartaros and taking you down? DAMN YOU!"
He shook his fists at the sky. "Always one step ahead of me!" he raged. "Thousands of years I've sought to circumvent this curse and you throw this at me! WILL IT NEVER END? WILL I NEVER BE FREE?"
He roared in fury, his own voice underscored by a primal, animalistic growl. "AAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!"
With a single finger, he ripped a city-sized chunk of land out of the ground and hurled it over the border.
"By the Old Gods, I hate you so much," he whispered, tears dripping down his face and washing off the blood he was soaked in.
He realized that the chunk of land he had thrown was floating in place, hovering high above the ground.
"Well, that's interesting," he remarked. He stared at it for a few more seconds, then shrugged and raced back to Clovenshire.
-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-
Discord stood atop the tallest parapet of his new, dark castle, which was slowly becoming taller, raising him up into the black sky, and pointier, until soon he could only fit one of his mismatched feet on its surface.
Fireballs and lightning bolts shot out of the sky, and he caught them in his hands and started throwing them into the city below, raging and ranting unintelligibly all the while.