I recomend you to read Elsa's POV first if you're also reading Light in the darkness, but of course, it's up to you.
Chapter 8. A sleepover of realization.
Today I am going on a sleepover at Snow's house with all my friends. It was a little difficult convincing my father, but he agreed when I told him it will be an only girls thing and that there would be no alcohol or drugs or dangerous excursions at night.
The plan is to leave our things at the house, go shopping, return, have dinner (which, knowing Snow, will be just an apple, which is why I brought a good amount of chocolates in my bag), stay up late talking and playing games and then go to sleep. Sounds nice, right? But you know what sounds even nicer? A sleepover with Elsa. We would walk around the block, have some ice-cream, talk, laugh, get to know each other, return home, have hot chocolate and chocolate cake for dinner, sit on the living room playing chess (though I'm sure she'd kick my ass every time, but I'd still enjoy it), maybe watch some movies and go to bed. We'd both sleep in my room since my bed is big enough, and I'd tickle her until she surrendered before finally falling asleep in her soft arms. That would be so nice! But we aren't that close yet, so… yeah.
I am so immersed on my thoughts that I don't notice Meg standing in front of me until she prods the tip of my nose with her finger.
We were supposed to meet at a train station that was near to Snow's house because I didn't know how to get there and, unlike the other girls, I don't have a chauffeur because my father wouldn't trust anyone enough to take me to places. So Meg is going to lead me to where the sleepover will be taking place.
"Hey, ginger." She says. "Daydreaming again?" She smirks and I grunt.
"Of course not." I deny pouting.
"Right." Meg rolls her eyes. "Come on, let's go. We shouldn't arrive late; you really don't want to see Snow's angry side."
Meg takes me by the waist and gently leads me through the streets full of houses that clearly belong to rich people, while she continues talking.
"So what made you so distracted?" She asks. I don't answer because I know she can always see through my lies and there's no way I'm telling her the truth. However, a faint blush appears on my cheeks as I remember my previous thoughts. "Or maybe I should ask who?" She says rising an eyebrow. I shook my head, but bite my lip as the words fight to come out of my mouth, after all, when I'm happy about something I can't keep myself from telling someone. "It's not that jerk Hans, is he?" She says this somewhat angry, but mostly worried.
"No, of course not." I quickly assure her. I've tell her almost everything about my relationship with Hans, so she knows I don't want to be with him anymore, but she's worried because I continue being his friend with benefits.
"Then who's the lucky guy?" She asks smiling again, though I can see though it; she'll kill the owner of the name if I told her. Sometimes she is as overprotective as my parents. I roll my eyes.
"It's nothing like that, okay? I was thinking about a friend, that's all."
"Yeah, and I suppose you blush every time you're thinking about your friends." She sarcastically retorts.
"She's a girl, so stop assuming things." Though I may say it's true that I only blush like that when I think about Elsa… how strange.
"So what if she's a girl? You can still like her that way." I don't know if I should take her seriously, after all she's always sarcastic, but she's also very strange, so it wouldn't surprise me if she thought that romantic relationships between two women are possible.
"Are you serious?" I ask unbelieving. "Two women can't be romantically involved with each other!"
"Oh, right. I forgot I was talking with miss 'I'm so straight that even rules envy me'." She makes a poor imitation of my voice, mocking of me. In other circumstances I would've punched her shoulder playfully for this, but now I'm too confused by her words.
Straight? What does she mean with that? What does it have to do with women having feelings for other women?
I open my mouth to ask this question when in that moment we hear a voice from our left and see a pink car with the back window totally down and Aurora's head poking out of it.
"Hey girls, don't you want a ride?" She asks enthusiastically. Meg grunts and I smile politely. I really wanted to continue talking with her, and I can't do it unless we're alone, but I know it wouldn't be wise to turn down Aurora's offering, so I answer for both of us.
"Of course, thank you Aurora."
"You're welcome." She answers while opening the door to allow us getting in.
We are in Snow's house. All of my friends were already here and they greeted us cheerfully. However, I couldn't help but notice a big difference between them and Elsa; even if she always try to conceal her feelings, she never fakes them: when she smiled at me it was because she really was happy to see me, not because she needed to pretend she was, when she was afraid, when she was nervous, when she was disgusted… all her emotions were real and her actions genuine, unlike them.
To be honest, I wasn't that interested on coming in the first place and now I was regretting staying, but I knew they'd all be mad if I didn't, so here I am, admiring the many mirrors that hang from the walls. I've heard that Snow and her step-mother were vain before, but I never imagined it came to this extent; seriously, it almost exactly like the House of Mirrors that was on the fair. Aside from that, it's a very pretty and luxurious house.
When we've all put our things in Snow's living room, we exit the mansion and get into her track, so her chauffeur drive us to the mall.
As always, we visit first the cloth shops… all of them; the ones which aren't 'nice' enough only visit to criticize them and the people who go there, and the other ones, to try on all we can find and criticize each other… yes, it's pretty awful, but I have no choice. I never noticed before how superficial they are, but I know they've always been this way. What changed, then? I know it was not them, so it has to be me. Only in five days? I think it may have something to with Elsa… or maybe not. I never really cared about what I wear; as long as it was comfortable and looked good enough; it didn't mattered its brand or if it was revealing enough, the only thing that mattered was if I liked it. So, I deduce that all those months I was acting just to fit in their group. Heck, my life the past few months was entirely a farce! And I didn't even notice! And for what? To gain fake friends and popularity, which would be taken from me if I stopped pretending to be like them… which is why, even now that I'm conscious about it, I won't stop. I just don't have the guts to face the consequences. I'm such a coward.
Well, at least now I have Elsa. I can be myself with her… wait. I said we should both think on ways of being friends without getting hurt, but the truth is that I haven't thought on anything. Maybe here I'll be able to make up a plan.
Let's see… A jewelry shop. They have those cheesy pendants of hearts broken in two, one for each person. They also have for friends. But no, that's exactly the opposite from what I'm searching for. I want a secret friendship, after all. Mmmmhh… but maybe I could buy something for Elsa's birthday's present. Not a necklace, though; I don't think she'd wear it even if she likes it. A bracelet? No, maybe a golden clock? That's even worst. Earrings? Yes! I've seen her wearing earrings, but they are so small that are hardly noticeable. She needs a nice pair of earrings that make her look even more beautiful, maybe blue to highlight her eyes, and long, definitely long.
"Do you wanna go see those?" Meg asks me in a whisper as she sees me gazing intensely at the earrings. "Go. I'll take care of them." She winks at me.
"Thanks." I smile before she goes to distract the other girls with some necklaces that are 'supposedly' the latest fashion but I'm guessing she just made that up a second ago. She is a good friend.
With the cost clear to search for Elsa's gift, I start looking around the store. That's when one of the employees approaches to me and asks me:
"Can I help you?"
"Uhm…" I trail off as I turn around to make sure none of my friends are near enough to listen. Nop; they are all too busy adorning themselves with jewelry and staring at the mirrors to even look at my direction. "I want earrings. Blue earrings. "
"I see." He says. "Which type?"
"Dangling. Long enough to be noticeable, but not to too much."
"Well, we have these models." He draws three pairs of earrings out of the showcase and gives them to me. I closely look at them. All of them are pretty, there's one which looks like a pair of starry skies, other which consists of two balls of teal rocks and another that resembles the deep blue of a clear summer sky. However, those aren't what I'm looking for.
"Uh… don't you have something that looks like… ice? " I ask. There's nothing better to describe Elsa's eyes' color, and I want them to compliment her eyes.
"Just one second." He says and goes to something from the back of the store and returns with another pair of earrings. These are glacier blue and see-though with the shape of two frozen water drops, which are just the length I wanted.
"Perfect." I exclaim. "I'll take them." Just as I say this, I remember that I'm still stuck with my friends, and that they can't see Elsa's gift, so I shouldn't buy it right now. "On better thought, can I pay now half of the price and come to purchase them latter?"
"Of course, I'll give you a note and with it you can come any time you want to reclaim these. "
"I'll do that." I nod.
A minute later it's all done, and I quickly return to my friends' side, who, thanks to Meg, hadn't even noticed my absence. After a few more minutes of pointless chatting about which brand of jewels is better while examining said jewels, we finally head out of the store. As we go to whichever store they wanted to go, Meg slows her pace so we can talk without them listening, and I do the same.
"So, what did you buy?" She asks. I consider telling her I didn't buy anything, but I know she most likely saw me handing the money to the employee.
"Just a gift for my mom." I shrug. I don't like lying to Meg, but I know even she wouldn't understand. She hates Elsa just like the others.
Then, we continue visiting some other stores, but nothing comes to my mind to solve the problem that I have with Elsa… until I see a phone store in the distance. If Elsa had a cellphone, we could send each other SMS! Even during school time, without anyone noticing. I know it's not ideal, but it's the best plan I've came up with. There's only one problem, though; Elsa doesn't have a cellphone, but I have enough money to buy one and give it to her as a Christmas present, after all, she said that it wasn't as if she didn't want one, right? However, it'll have to wait; I've already take one risk when buying her earrings. I'd have to come back some other day, maybe tomorrow, by my own.
After arriving to Snow's house and having dinner, which predictably consisted on an apple, it's time to play. I thought we'd play board games like monopoly or checkers or I don't know, something like that, but we'll play something of Snow's own invention… well, Meg told me it was actually her stepmother's invention, but Snow always says it's hers.
"Mirror, mirror on the wall!" She announces excitedly as she holds a pink box with a piece of a mirror on its cover. All the girls let out excited squeals.
But it's not really a mirror. And it's not on the wall.
As I see the angry and accusing gazes they all direct to me, I instantly realize that I just voiced my thoughts without noticing.
"But I like it, really!" I quickly exclaim rising my hands to beg for forgiveness. "A-after all, who wants an actual mirror just stuck in a boring wall, right?" I say nervously. "This is a lot more cool… I mean cooler!" I sigh and lower my head. Why is my language always affected when I get nervous?
However, it works to make them cool off about the whole issue, since they maliciously laugh at me and forget about my previous words in an instant. I wouldn't really mind in other circumstances, but I know they are purposely making their laughs more strident to embarrass me further. I let it pass, though. I know it was my fault for speaking my thoughts in the first place.
When their laughter finally dies, Snow turns to me and starts explaining the game.
"Since you're new here, I'll have to teach you how to play. It's very simple actually, I think that even a silly girl like you can comprehend it.2 I roll my eyes but say nothing. "First, the one who holds the mirror has to say: 'Mirror, mirror on the wall…' and asks it a question, then everyone has to grab a piece of paper and write what they think answers said question. Once it's done, we have to put the papers inside the box. The one who holds it, has to shake it, open it and choose a paper, which will be the answer. Understand?" I nod. "Good. I'll go first." She holds the box so she's looking directly to the 'mirror' and starts. "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?"
"That's her favorite question." Meg whispers to my ear. "Even though she gets mad whenever her name isn't chosen." She giggles and I do so too. In that moment, Ariel hands me a piece of paper and a pencil, and we start writing the name of who we think is the fairest of them all.
That's easy.
Only one name appears on my mind.
Once we've placed the names on the box and Snow has shaken it and chosen one, she holds up the chosen paper and reads aloud:
"Elsa Frost."
A death-like silence descends upon the room. Everyone turns to look at each other with questioning gazes… everyone except Meg, who instantly turns to me, knowing full well that I was the one who wrote it. Snow notices this and asks me coldly:
"Anna, sweetheart, were you the one who wrote this?" Instantly I know I'm in trouble.
"Y-you didn't say anything about asking whose paper was it." I nervously say, trying to avoid the question.
"My game, my rules. Answer me." She says even more harshly.
"W-what if I did?" I retort against my better judgment.
"It was me." Meg interferes before Snow can give me some nasty answer. "It was only a joke. I wanted to see you faces if it was chosen." She laughs half-heartedly, buy no one else does, probably because they don't believe her. I don't laugh either because I'm too shocked to react.
Why would she take the blame for me?
"Check the names if you don't believe me." She says confidently as she notices their dubious expressions.
Snow does as she's told, reading each paper one by one.
"Aurora, Ariel, Snow White, Cinderella and… Anna." She reads my name in disbelief, as if she wasn't expecting it to be there.
"The only name missing is mine, as you can see." Meg says. "Meaning, I was the one who wrote Elsa's. You know I'm always sarcastic, and I wanted to add a fun touch to this game, so by writing that ice bitch's name, I really meant that she's the exact opposite of fair." She smirks.
All nod in understanding and eventually start laughing at Meg's little joke. I wonder for a second why did they believed her so easily, but then I understand that all wrote their own names… and Meg wrote mine, so they all believed her when she said it had been her who wrote Elsa's; because she seemed to be the only one who haven't wrote her own name.
"Thank you." I whisper to her when the others are busy laughing and commenting how Elsa was the farthest thing from fair.
"You're welcome." She whispers back. "Just don't do it again."
"I won't." I promise. I've re-learned one important lesson today: don't express your thoughts if they are against what they think.
We keep playing 'Mirror, mirror' for hours, since Snow certainly doesn't seem get tired of it. I, on the other hand, soon don't want to play anymore. I noticed that every time someone asked a mean question like 'Who is the ugliest of them all?' or 'Who is the one who deserves death most?', everyone wrote Elsa's name. Well, sometimes they wrote the name of another 'looser', but Elsa's was their ultimate favorite. Each time her name was chosen I felt pain and rage surge within my heart, but I always bit my tongue to keep myself from disagreeing with them out loud.
After three hours of torture, I can't conceal my thoughts and feelings anymore, so I suggest we should play another game, like 'Truth or dare'. To my surprise, they agree and we play for another hour or so until Aurora and Snow start to yawn.
"Already asleep?" Asks Cinderella in a teasing tone.
"Shut up. Not all of us can dance until midnight and still be awake enough sneak into our parents' house." Aurora retorts.
"Sure, Sleeping "Beauty"" Ariel says, quoting the last word. The other girls start giggling as Aurora pouts.
"Sleeping Beauty is the nickname we gave her because she was always the last one to wake up during sleepovers." Meg whispers to my ear and I nod in thanks.
"Say whatever you want but sleep helps you keep being young and beautiful." Snow says. At this no one dares to complain or say even a word about how early it is yet to sleep considering this a sleepover. "Now, it's time to go to bed. I have had another bed moved into my bedroom, but a third one would make us feel crowded, so I decided two of us will have to stay in the room next to mine. It's time to decide the sleep arrangements." Then, she turns to Meg. "Meg, please, can you wait for us somewhere else as we decide?" She asks politely, batting her eyelids, but I notice that Meg tenses up and a hurt look overtake her features as she get up and walks away.
What was all that about?
"Well." Snow says as she takes out of a little purse four sticks. "As I'm the owner of this house, so I'm not going to sleep with that dyke." That word again. I suppose it's a bad word. I'll never understand why they treat Meg so differently; she's their friend after all, right? Why the disguised aggression isn't enough? "So now we'll decide who of you will be the unfortunate one to share bed with her, and to make it fair, it will be randomly. Grab a stick, the one who chooses the smallest one, will have to do it."
We do as Snow instructed and, by the end, I am the one holding the smallest stick. I actually don't mind sleeping with Meg; she's my best friend after all, but as I hear their laughs and mocking, I become a little anxious.
"Bad for you, Anna." Snow laughs with a malicious smirk in her eyes.
"In the morning you'll tell us if you survived in one piece." Ariel says giggling.
"Or if you lost your panties." Cinderella adds.
"We better give them the other room to allow them some privacy." Aurora says and the others burst into even a louder laughter.
"Oh, that reminds me…" Says Snow after most of the giggles have died. "We should get going now to the room." They all nod and stand up to follow, but I know I won't be able to sleep if I'm left with the doubt of why it's so terrible for them to sleep with Meg, and I can't ask her because that would be impolite.
"Wait." I say standing up. "Why is it such a terrible thing to sleep with Meg?"
"Because she's a dyke." Aurora answers as a matter of factly. I stare at her confused. "Lesbian, homosexual, gay, whatever you want to call it." She adds. Those words don't make any sense to me; the only one I've heard before is "gay", but I've always thought it referred to a man who acted like a girl, which in this case makes no sense.
"What do you mean?" I ask, despite the danger of looking stupid.
"She likes women." Ariel interferes. "As in a sexual way." She adds after seeing my confused stare.
"B-but she has a boyfriend!" I protest.
"Fine." She rolls her eyes. "She's bisexual then. She likes both, women and men."
"B-but…" I try to make another question, however, Snow interrupts me.
"I'm tired." She says. "Let's go sleep."
At this, the others walk beside her to the rooms, but I stay behind trying to make sense to what they just told me. Women don't like women, right? They are supposed to like men, but then again, if it was as unheard as I think, there wouldn't be so many words to describe those who have these preferences. Besides, I was only able to leave my house a few months ago, and that's probably the reason of why I never knew anything about this. Also, since all of the TV shows, movies and books I've ever seen, are about couples consisting on a men and a women, I never thought it was even possible… until now.
"Anna?" I hear Ariel's voice calling for me. "Don't worry, if Meg actually rapes you, then Hans would kill her for stealing his chance to take your virginity himself." She reassures me. Her words make my stomach twist uncomfortably, but not because I think Meg is going to rape me, after all she's my friend; she'd never do that, but because they remind me of Hans wanting to bed me.
"Y-yes! You're right." I say, trying to look relieved. "Let's go sleep." And I start following them towards the chambers.
Originally I had planned on eating chocolates with Meg as soon as the other girls turned off the lights, but strangely I don't feel in the mood, and I just lay down in bed looking away from Meg, just thinking and thinking and thinking. After a few minutes, maybe an hour, I can't take it anymore and get out of the room to head towards the bathroom. There, I wash my face hoping it would help me clear my thoughts, but I'm still as haunted by them as before, so I go to the glass doors that lead to the pool and stare at the waters.
If what they say is true, and women can sexually like other women, then that would explain a lot; why, as handsome as Hans is, he never evoked in me the feelings that just touching another female do, or why I usually catch myself staring at other girls in ways only men should… or why it feels so good when I touch Elsa; it would explain my obsession towards the girl, and why it can't go a day without me wanting to at least be near to her, even if it's just to bully her, as insane as it may sound. I like Elsa. I want her, and not precisely like a friend.
I sigh. Yes, it would explain a lot of things, but I guess it will take a little more convincing to get my brain to accept that I, in fact, prefer women. Doubts swirl through my brain as I remember the pleasure that I, nonetheless, felt while kissing Hans, even though the other activities weren't as good for me.
In that moment a voice interrupts my thoughts.
"You can't sleep?" Meg asks from behind me.
"No." I answer shortly, not parting my gaze from the waters.
"They told you, didn't they? About me?"
"Yes." My mind is so confused right now that I can't bring myself to give her better answers.
"Anna… we're friends." She says, clearly sad and hurt. "I'd never even kiss you without your permission. Nothing changed." She pleads desperately.
"That's not… I'm not worried about that." I bring myself to say while turning towards her. "I-it's just… I never even consider the mere possibility before."
"Of a woman liking another woman?" She asks sounding more like her sarcastic self. "What's so shocking about that?"
"I… I think I may be…" I pause, unable to say any of the words.
"Lesbian?" She provides. I nod.
"How… How did you find out?" I ask, hoping that her answer would help me. She sighs while resting her back at the wall by my side.
"It's a long story."
"We have all night." I answer. She chuckles.
"Fine. I'll tell you." Suddenly her giggling stops and she becomes more serious. "It all started about six years ago, when I was twelve. It was my first year of middle school, so I had to make new friends. There was a girl who was beautiful as a flower and strong as thunder, and her name was Helen." Meg sighs. "She was also gentle and had a heart of pure gold, and it didn't take long before we both were the best friends ever. After a couple of years, I started to feel a strange attraction towards her; she was the only person I ever thought about, and I just wanted to hug her and… kiss her all the time. I was no fool. I knew I had fallen in love, but as you, I was confused and didn't think it was right at all. One day, I talked to her about how I felt, and guess what?" She smiled. "She felt the same. That day we kissed and suddenly it all fell into place, and we accepted our sexuality with open arms. "
"What happened then?" I ask, really interested in the story.
"We became official girlfriends and kept dating for over a year, even after entering High School. However, that was when I met Hans, Snow, Aurora and Cinderella. They came and offered us the opportunity to be their friends, to be part of the 'High school royalty'." She sighed. "Of course, to get into the club, we'd have to stop being girlfriends because 'Dykes aren't allowed'." She mocked Snow's voice. "As you may know, Snow is very homophobic, so she asked just because Hans wanted us near him so he could ogle at our bodies."
A dreading sensation starts to rise inside me, anticipating what was going to come next.
"Y-you agreed… Right?" I ask, even though I don't want to hear the cruel truth.
"No, neither of us did. I loved her way more than I wanted social status." I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding at her words, but there was still something that didn't make sense.
"Then how did you end up being their friend?"
"They started bullying us and putting all the school against us." She sighs. "It was not only as some sort of revenge, but also to pressure us into accepting being part of their group. I wasn't that affected from it, but Helen wasn't that strong, and I had to see how she became sadder every day." She took a deep breath. "That's when I made a harsh decision; I joined their group to protect her, but she didn't understand, she told me I was betraying her and, soon after, moved to Greece with her family. I never saw her again." She sighs, lowering her head in shame, her voice heavy with sadness. I know her, though; she won't cry even if her heart is breaking at the memories.
I hug her to comfort her and she hugs me back tightly. After a few moments however, she breaks the embrace.
"Are you alright?" I ask concerned.
"It happened a long time ago. It doesn't matter anymore." She says with a hardened tone, and I know she is trying to hide her true feelings, however I don't pry because I know she'd only become sadder. I decide to change the subject.
"So you discovered your sexuality after a kiss, right?" She nods. "That explains why I'm not entirely sure yet. I haven't kissed a woman."
"Oh. Do you wanna try?" She asks with a suggestive tone and slowly approaching to me. "Hopefully it'd take away any doubts you may have." She takes a strand of my hair and places it being my ear, brushing my cheek in the process making me blush and swallow loudly as butterflies appear on my stomach.
She places her other hand on my other cheek and leans in for a kiss. My heart rate becomes faster, like way faster, as I close my eyes and wait for her lips to touch mine. When it happens, it's like an explosion of emotion running through my body in the most pleasurable way. This is how my first kiss should've been; it's perfect, absolutely perfect, and her lips are so soft and gentle over mine… it feels very different from Hans' kisses, even if it's actually the same action, and for the first time, a hunger surges within me. I want more.
I let out a soft moan as I grab Meg's shoulders and she instantly presses her tongue against my lips, actually asking for permission (something Hans never does), which I gladly grant her, and for once I don't feel repulsion as a foreign saliva mix with mine and a soft tongue explores every corner of my mouth.
Meg pulls away sooner that I'd have liked her to and stares into my eyes, while we both breathe heavily.
"Did you like it?" She asks.
I prefer let the actions speak themselves, so as I spot a couch near us, I kiss her, this time more fervently, while I push her towards it. My plan was to lay on top of her in there and make out, but when her legs hit the edge of the couch, she ends the kiss and pushes me to down into the couch as she straddles me and resumes our passionate intercourse.
For some blissful minutes, the world stops its course as we kiss and touch and bite. The pleasure that runs through my body is the most wonderful think I've ever experienced (yes, it's even better than eating chocolate), and when I touch her delicate curves, it just feels so right, like it was meant to be. There's also a burning feeling within my legs that begs me to continue, to go further, and I really want to comply. However, when she starts kissing my neck, my brain stops functioning correctly, and the image of a certain blonde appears on my mind just as Meg bites me, making all my inhibitions disappear in the blink of an eye.
"Oh Els…" I moan. I try to stop myself before it is too late, but Meg has already heard me. She freezes for a few moments and then rises her head to look directly at my eyes, which are currently fill with remorse and anger towards myself.
"Good way to kill the mood, feisty pants." She says sighing and getting off of me. I sit on the couch feeling utterly frustrated and she sits at my side, with a defeated pose and looking at the floor.
"Sorry." I softly apologize. "I didn't mean to."
"I know." She sighs again. "It just came naturally because you have a crush on the girl. I didn't want to accept it, but… now I see the truth." Her voice turns sad and disappointed, and I think I know why.
"You didn't just kiss me because you wanted me to realize my true sexuality, did you?" I ask, but she stays quiet. "You have a crush on me." She just nods. I place a hand on her shoulder to comfort her. "I'm sorry… but I-I didn't choose who to fall for. I-I mean, you're a wonderful person, and I love you… as friend, alright, but if I could choose someone to fall in love with, that would be you." I reassure her, I don't want her to feel bad, just as I don't want this to separate us.
"I-I know." She says softly. "The way you devoured my lips proves it." She turns to me and smirks mischievously, but her smile instantly falls. "I know it didn't mean anything for you, though." She adds. "I don't blame you for that. Don't worry about me."
"But…" I try to protest.
"Anna, I must be honest with you. I don't really like Elsa and I'd prefer it if you didn't even go near her." The sincerity and harshness of her words surprise me and I'm left without words. "But… that's not my decision to make." She admits. "I would like to be enough for you, but if you're happy with Elsa, then, as your friend, I will be by your side." She casts a sad smile to me.
"Thanks, Meg." I say as I hug her. "That means a lot to me."
We keep hugging for a while as we both comfort each other, and in her embrace I find hope and love. Finally, she breaks the hug.
"Well, I think this has been too much for one night." She says. "Wanna go back to sleep?"
"I'm not tired yet." I protest, but a yawn contradicts me. I rub my eyes trying to push away the slumber, but no use.
"Come on, let's go." She says as she helps me stand up. Then we both walk to the room and I instantly fall on the bed like a sack of rocks. I hear Meg giggling, but she jumps at my side anyways. "Can I cuddle you or would that be too much?" She asks.
"Go ahead, I don't mind." I say yawning again. In that moment, I feel slim arms surrounding my waist. "Just don't touch anything you shouldn't." I joke.
"I can't promise anything." She answers and the smile can be heard in her voice. I giggle softly.
"Goodnight." I say.
"Before you fall asleep completely…" She starts. "Let me tell you something: If you really want that girl, go for it. Don't let anyone stop you, not even me… or Hans." I tense at this last statement. I know she's right; he won't just accept one 'I'm lesbian, sorry' and let me go. "However. "She continues, sensing my stress. "If you want her as your girlfriend, I have to give her my consent; get to know her to make sure she's good enough for you. "
"She is, don't worry." I answer.
"Well, but if she breaks your heart, I will beat the shit out of her." We both giggle at her statement.
"That won't be necessary." I assure her.
"Fine. Goodnight."
"'night." I say before drifting into a land of beautiful dreams, all bout a certain blonde with the kindest heart in the world.