Hey everyone!
Guess who's in Textiles again?
The winners from the last chapter's contest are:
1st Place- The Beloved Bookworm (Piffle)
2nd Place- Thalia Ginny C (Omnishambles)
3rd Place- Bunnyman4 (Serendipity)
Congratulations to all winners and look out for your words in the next chapter!
Additionally, The Beloved Bookworm will receive Chapter 20 in his/her Inbox (in advance, of course)!
The Adventures of a Lovesick Idiot: Thank Zeus for Llamas!
"Gaia's totally gonna have your head, or whatever's left in there. You do know that right? Remember what happened to the last guy who didn't do what she said?"
"Yeah… He went on vacation with his wife to Hawaii…"
"No! Not Samson, you dolt! Richards! He was drowned in a tub of hot sauce."
"Your point being what exactly?"
A sigh echoed throughout the ship.
"There's a reason everyone calls you an idiot, isn't there?"
Leo sighed heftily. It was frustrating not knowing what Calypso was doing. He slowly reached for the button on the side of the TV. It was so close. So close… His calloused finger was inches away from the big red forbidden button. He snatched his finger back when he heard footsteps thundering down the hallway.
"HAZEL!" the masculine voice bellowed. "I NEED HELP!"
There were shuffling noises that implied that Hazel was getting to the door.
"What is it Coach?" she said sounding half asleep.
"Do you have any spare drachmas on you?" Coach Hedge whispered desperately. "Fifty or so should be enough."
Leo wrinkled his nose. What would Coach need fifty drachmas for? Either he wanted to melt them down to meld a giant statue of Pan, or Hedge was secretly a gryphon. Both sounded equally likely.
Leo walked over to his door and closed it slowly. 'I guess I'm not the only weirdo on the ship then,' he thought happily.
What was this terrible place? Where was she? Why in Tartarus were llamas falling from the sky?!
None of those questions could be answered by Calypso. It seemed very likely that she was somewhere in South America though… If it weren't for the fluffy llamas, Calypso had no idea how long it would take for her to establish her whereabouts. Thank Zeus for llamas!
But now came the hard part, how was she supposed to find her way around?
It wasn't like she had a map… And besides, even if she did, how could she be sure that Leo would find her? Calypso mentally face-palmed. She hadn't thought this out very well, had she?
Right now all she could do was look around.
A while later…
It wasn't like she was part of the Girl Guides. Calypso had no idea how to survive in the world without her wind spirits. Despite the fact that they were invisible, she had grown to love them. You try being exiled to a desert island with wind spirits. Let's see how well you guys get along after four thousand years. Spending four thousand years in another dimension and not getting along with your room mates simply wasn't a valid option.
After four whole hours of frolicking around, all she had managed to gather were a couple of suspicious-looking berries (that may or may not be poisonous), some strange plants (that may or may not be just plain grass), a small pond of murky water (that may or may not be inhabited by frogs and a dead llama (that may or may have not been the one that fell off a mountain-side).
Calypso glanced at the berries and decided not to risk her life. It was only then that she remembered she was immortal and didn't need human food.
"There goes four hours of my precious life I'll never get back," she said out loud.
Seeing as she spent that much time on getting food, she ate it just for the sake of it. Human food was better than no food at all.
She nibbled like a rabbit on the grass. For all those people out there who want to know what grass tastes like, it's terrible. She spat it straight out and proceeded to getting the taste out with llama meat.
Don't worry people. Calypso cooked the meat first. Don't ask me how. She's magical, okay?
'Bleurgh,' Calypso thought, 'You're never catching me near that stuff ever again!'
"It's okay everyone. I have the situation perfectly under control. This ship isn't exploding into flames anytime soon," he reassured.
Leo wasn't sure how long he could keep this up. Was the ship even in that much danger, you ask? Well, yes. Coach Hedge was having his first attempt of cooking… ever.
Yes, I know that the ship supplies magical plates that create any type of food possible (even tin cans!) but Coach insisted. He was a very stubborn man/goat/satyr-thingie. Coach Hedge was in a really good mood for some reason. Although the satyr enjoyed eating silverware and napkins, he wanted to show how much he appreciated the demigods.
He could get a bouquet, teach a free lesson of PE, or even sing a song, but no, he just had to cook.
Leo was having a hard time keeping the other five demigods (Frank, Jason, Hazel, Piper and Nico that is) from prying the Coach away from the stove. Sure, he wanted to stop Coach as well, but he didn't want to be the one kicked all the way to the other side of the world (Jamaica, maybe?).
"Do you guys really want to travel all around the world with a baseball bat?" Leo frantically asked.
The demigods got the message and slumped away to their respective rooms, but not before giving Leo a simultaneous mega-glare.
Leo awkwardly darted his eyes around the kitchen before deciding to turn around and monitor the Coach's cooking.
"No Coach… no… The oil does not go directly on the fire… NO!"
YAY! I managed to update! Don't expect another update for… forever? No, not really. Maybe Saturday (And I'm talking about Eastern Australian time)? Please review! And remember next chapter will have the three winning entries!
BRING ON THE FLAMES, COS UNCLE LEO'S HERE!