That night, I sat by the fire, holding a sleeping Cheyenne. Daryl, T-Dog, Glenn, and Rick took turns keeping watch. Carol offered to stay with Cheyenne so I could get up and stretch my legs. Walking away from the camp site, I walked past the wall toward the woods. Though dark still, the sky was turning from black to dark blue. Morning was coming soon, which meant we'd be on the move again.
Standing by the edge of the woods, I kept my eyes on my surroundings, waiting. For movement. For a sound. Ever since we had stopped on the road, I'd been hoping that Andrea and Shay would come out of the woods, alive. It seemed like wishful thinking. A slim chance of that happening. I felt overcome with dread and sadness.
I'm so sorry. Andrea...Shay. I loved you both, so much. Shay..you've been there for me for so long. Tried so hard to keep you alive. Now you're gone... I dunno if I'll ever see you again, alive anyway. If you're out there, hope you and Andrea found each other. Y'all will survive together...Please find each other. Please be alive. I could feel the tears in my eyes.
"Spencer, you all right?" Daryl's voice made me whirl around to face him.
"Yea." I breathed, my heart racing. "Sneakin' up on folks.."
"And Chy?" Daryl asked. I looked at the ground.
"I don't know, really. Cried herself to sleep. Carol's got her now. Maybe she'll talk when she wakes up." I said quietly.
"Caught some squirrel." Daryl offered. "Least we got us some breakfast."
"Thanks. We're gonna need it... Daryl? What'd we do now?" I asked, looking up at his face.
"Keep goin'." Daryl replied firmly.
"Yea? Where we got to go? No where." Shaking my head, I kicked the ground. "We left 'em."
"Couldn't go back. Stop, Spencer." Daryl grabbed my shoulders. "Don't do that to yourself. Won't do nothin' good for ya."
"Cheyenne. She's first." I said numbly. "Chy comes first."
"Right." Daryl nodded.
"Can't keep her safe forever." I looked out toward the woods. "Never gonna stop, is it? They're just gonna keep comin' and comin' for us."
"Need'a teach her to shoot." Daryl said gruffly. "Know she's young. Still."
"We ain't got no place to teach her." I looked around at the camp site. "We ain't got nothin'."
"Yea, well. We're gonna find somethin'." Daryl assured me. He took my hand in his and looked into my eyes. Looking into his eyes, I could see something of assurance. Something that told me everything was going to be okay. I squeezed his hand and we walked back toward camp. Rick walked toward us from the wall, his face looking empty.
"We need gas. Supplies. The others are scared outta their minds. We aren't separating, it's not an option. I checked the map, and there's a small town a few miles south of here. We're goin'." Rick instructed. I looked at Daryl, who shook his head in agreement. The three of us walked over to the others and I walked to Cheyenne.
"Chy?" I said gently, shaking her. "Wake up, hun."
"What?" Cheyenne croaked groggily, opening her eyes.
"Gotta get up." I said quietly.
"Did they find us?" Cheyenne jumped up in panic.
"No, no. Nothin' like that. Just time to move on." I explained, wishing I could take away the fear in her eyes. She relaxed and stood up, stretching.
"Listen up, everyone. There's a town a few miles south of here. We're goin'. Gonna go see how bad it is there, and if we can find a safe place to hole up for bit. At least until we can find somewhere stable. Daryl," Rick looked over at Daryl, "can you go back to the main road and siphon some gas?"
"You got it." Daryl began walking toward his motorcycle.
"Hey, need some help?" I asked, but Rick stopped me.
"Daryl's fine on his own. I need a good shooter here, just in case." Rick said firmly. I looked over at Daryl.
"He's right. Stay." Daryl agreed. I nodded and grabbed Cheyenne, pulling her close. I watched as Daryl started the motorcycle and took off toward the direction we had come from. Sighing, I looked at Carol.
"Daryl caught some squirrel." I mentioned.
"Yes, I'm gonna start on that right now." Carol began buzzing around, grabbing up sticks to cook the meat with. I sat down near the fire, Cheyenne in my lap.
"You all right?" I asked, looking at her.
"Shay's dead, ain't she." Cheyenne didn't ask, but more stated. "Jus' like Rick said. Her and Andrea, they're dead or they ain't at the farm anymore."
"Knowin' Shay and Andrea, maybe they made it off the farm together." I tried to sound hopeful.
"Dunno. We can barely save ourselves. Doubt the two of them made it. And if they did get off the farm, they won't make it long alone... That's what it is. Them 'gainst us. And there's way more of them. Rick was right. We're all gonna die 'ventually. Jus' try to survive as long as we can." Cheyenne looked up at me, and I realized the sad truth.
Her eyes were no longer bright blue and full of excitement. Cheyenne's little blue eyes were dull and tired. She had dark circles underneath her eyes. Of course, she had already been small. I mean, she was only five, but she had gotten smaller. Skinnier. And she had grown wise beyond her years. The words she had spoken were words that should have come from a grown person.
"Honey..." I trailed off, unsure of what to say.
"Ain't nothin' you can say." Cheyenne said softly. "Cause I'm right. I'll be six in three days, ya know."
"What?" I looked at her in shock. "How'd you know what day it is?" I asked.
"Back at the farm, there was a calendar on the wall. I looked at it, the day before we got attacked. I had five days 'til my birthday." Cheyenne said simply.
"You're one smart kid, ya know that?" I pulled her close again. "Maybe Daryl and I can find somethin' for you."
"No..." Cheyenne shook her head. "Jus' somewhere safe. That's all I want." She stood up from my lap and walked over to Carl. Sitting down beside him, I watched as she took his hand and whispered something to him. He nodded and whispered something back. It was good to know that the kids had each other.
Breakfast was mostly quiet. Carl and Cheyenne talked quietly in whispers. Maggie and Glenn ate near the wall, watching for any signs of walkers. Rick and Lori hadn't spoken since the episode Daryl and I had witnessed in the woods... I ate less than usual, declining the other portion that Carol tried to shove at me.
"Spencer, you sure?" Carol asked, still holding the squirrel meat toward me.
"I'm full." I held up my hand. "I'm sure." I gave a half ass grin, which made Carol smile and turn to Lori.
"Well, then, you eat up." Carol instructed. Lori took the meat and glared at me. What the hell I do now? I wondered as she began to eat. The sound of an engine roaring towards us made me jump up. I could hear it in the distance.
"What?" Maggie called, looking at me from the wall.
"Daryl." I said surely.
"Good! We can keep moving now!" Glenn chirped. Daryl's motorcycle came into view, and I felt my heart skip a beat. Thank God... I shook my head and walked toward the road. Daryl stopped the motorcycle and began unstrapping the gas cans from the back.
"Everything went good?" I asked, looking him over.
"Yea." He grunted, picking up a gas can and walking over to Rick's vehicle. After filling up both vehicles and Daryl's motorcycle, we all gathered around at the vehicles waiting for Rick's instructions. Rick walked up looking at our patient faces and gave out a small sigh.
"All right. We're gonna try for this small town on the map. Maybe it will be safe enough to board up for the night. If not, we leave immediately. If it's overrun, we won't stay. A few walkers, we'll take them out. Scavenge the area. We need supplies." Rick said, looking off in the distance.
"And if it's not safe? Then what?" Carol asked, her voice full of worry.
"Then we keep moving, try to find somethin' off the map, somewhere like the old camp back near Atlanta." Rick replied.
"We got overrun there." Glenn spoke up.
"We won't stay there long. It will be temporary. Hershel was right. We will not make the same mistake twice." Rick said, and I could hear the annoyance in his voice. "Now let's get goin'."
I watched as everyone began hopping into cars. Riding arrangements remained the same. Katherine gave me a sideways glance before opening the car door and sitting inside, shutting the door behind her. Movement caught my eye, and I saw Sam walking toward me. Daryl was at my side immediately, bristling.
"Spencer... I'm sorry." Sam shook his head as he reached me. I was silent. "I'm sorry about Shay and Andrea. Sorry 'bout the farm... Sorry about Katherine. I just... She was the only thing left, Spence. I know she was bad to us, but she's our mother. Had to try and protect her. Thought she was different... Thought she changed. But I was wrong, and I know it. I'm sorry... If you hate me for defendin' her, I understand. I'd hate me, too."
"Don't hate you, Sam." I sighed. "I love you. And I always will. You're my big brother.. C'mere, stupid." I mumbled, grabbing him in a hug. He hugged me back, squeezing me.
"I love you too, Sis." Sam backed away and gave me a grin. "Be careful, huh?"
"Always am." I flashed a thumbs up and turned toward Rick's vehicle. "Chy!" I called to her, and my little blue eyed blonde came running.
"See you later." Cheyenne said bluntly, hugging me.
"See you later. Love you." I whispered, kissing her head.
"Love you." Cheyenne whispered back. She ran the few steps to Daryl, throwing her arms around his waist. "Bye!"
"Uh.. Bye." Daryl hugged her back with one arm, before she tore away and ran to jump into the vehicle with Carl.
"She's changin', ya know." I stated, watching her go.
"Ain't we all." Daryl mumbled gruffly.
"She said Rick was right. About Andrea and Shay. Either they're dead or they ain't at the farm no more. Said she'd doubted they even made it off the farm, and if they did they won't last long alone. It's them against us. We're all gonna die eventually, just tryin' to survive as long as we can. That's what she said." I looked at Daryl for some kind of comfort.
"She said that?" Daryl looked back at me. "An' she's how old?"
"Six in three days." I murmured.
"Huh." Daryl grunted. "Maybe we'll find somethin' for her."
"That's what I said. She told me she didn't want nothin'. Just somewhere safe." I said, walking over to Daryl. "Maybe we'll get there some day." Daryl nodded and straddled his motorcycle. I climbed on after him, and waited for Rick's signal. Looking back, I saw Rick stick his hand out the window and give a wave. Vehicles came to life, but were drowned out by Daryl's motorcycle cranking up.
Holding on tight, we rode away from our empty camp. I felt Daryl tense up at my touch, and I loosened my grip some. My thoughts were swirling as we rode along. What's up with him? He's actin' all..weird. Quiet and stand offish... Not now. Please, Daryl don't do this now. I need you. I need you more than you'll ever know.
Keeping my eyes on the road, I tried to tune out my thoughts, make them go away. The sun was shining bright, but the air was freezing as we rode along the empty highway. Snuggling closer to Daryl, I ignored it when he tensed up again. I rested my head on his back and watched as the world passed by.
I don't think I ever had quite gotten used to it. The emptiness. No cars, no people. The roads were bare, maybe a broken down car every great once in a while. Other than that, there was nothing. We saw a couple of walkers out in a field, but nothing more. I lifted my head to see a sign coming up. Squinting, I could barely make out the faded words.
'Feed and Seed. 1 Mile' is what it said. That meant we were close to the town. Looking around, I saw nothing threatening, but that didn't mean a thing. There were a few houses, I assumed they were probably empty, along the road. I glanced ahead to see a building coming up.
Rick gave a small honk of his horn, and Daryl pulled off the road into the 'Feed and Seed' parking lot. Glancing around, I kept my eyes on the area, watching for any movement. Rick stepped out of his vehicle and walked over to us. I climbed off the bike, Daryl doing the same. We turned to face Rick who looked tired.
"Well, we're basically here. We take that road," Rick pointed to the left of the 'Feed and Seed', "then take the first right and we'll be in town. Hopefully we'll find somethin' of use. Maybe a night we can spend here."
"Want us to go inside this store and see if there's anything to eat? Or anything of use?" I asked, looking from Rick to Daryl.
"Yea, go ahead. Just make it a quick as possible." Rick nodded.
"All right." I turned to Daryl, pulling out my hunting knife. The two of us walked quietly to the building. Daryl opened the door with complete silence, and we crept inside.
The building wasn't huge, but it was small either. Daryl and I stayed close, checking behind any doors. We found no walkers, and once Daryl was sure the store was safe, we split up. Walking around, I quickly realized that this place wasn't going to be much help. I walked down an isle to find a few canned goods. I snatched them up and kept looking around.
Stepping around a corner, I came face to face with Daryl. He had four water bottles in his arms, and gave me a smirk. I grinned, showing him the canned goods I had found. A can of corn, two cans of spaghetti o's with meatballs, and three cans of creamed corn. It wasn't much, but it was something.
"Daryl? You...okay?" I asked quietly as we walked toward the door.
"Fine." Daryl said, his voice actually soft.
"You're just... Actin' weird." I slipped. I squinched up my face, regretting my words.
"I..." Daryl trailed off, suddenly turning towards me. "Dunno how to handle this. You. Dunno how to even begin to understand how I feel the way I do about you. All I know, s'that when the farm got overrun, I was goin' crazy, Spence. Crazy thinkin' 'bout where you were. You jumped off my motorcycle and took off into the dark. Thought I'd never see you again..." Daryl was quiet. I wasn't sure what to say, so I didn't say anything. We walked out of the store and toward Rick. Maggie and Glenn had gotten out, stretching their legs.
"Found some canned goods, ain't much..." I handed them to Rick.
"And water." Daryl added, as we helped Rick put the supplies in his vehicle.
"Thanks, that will be dinner tonight." Rick gave us a thankful smile. "Remember the directions?"
"Got it!" Daryl called, and we walked back over to the motorcycle. I climbed on after him, leaning against him.
"I'm here, Daryl." I whispered into his ear before he started the engine. The motorcycle came to life, and I thought maybe he didn't hear me. But as soon as we turned right, his hand left the motorcycle handle. Reaching back, he touched the side of my face briefly before he returned his hand back to the handle. So, he heard me after all.
Hey guys sorry for the longggg wait ! This chapter had a lot of meaning to me cause you get to see changes in Cheyenne and in Daryl. He actually opens up a tad bit to Spencer and lets her know that there's something big there. Of course he still hasn't busted out the "I love you" yet, but maybe he will one day ! I'm excited to do all the running around they went through, cause I get to just make it up ! I HATED THE WAY SEASON 3 ENDED. I cried like a little baby. UGHHHH I wanted her to make it back to the group and get with Rick :( She fought so hard... I hated it that she died. I will update as soon as I can.
~Kaila