Eek… I haven't updated in a while have I? Hope you enjoy this chapter despite it being a bit short. I didn't mention this last time but I would like to thank guest reviewer 'uhh im artemis' because he/she me to start writing fanfic again. If it wasn't for her/him, I probably wouldn't have posted Chapter 32 or this one for a matter of facts.

School starts tomorrow... :'(

Enjoy the chapter~

The Adventures of a Lovesick Idiot: Dryad Urine

Calypso had finished three continuous hours of training with her new dagger.

At the end of that training, Chiron presented Calypso with a fashionable belt.
"It's for the dagger," he explained. Chiron put his finger through a loop attached to the strip of leather. "I messaged a couple of Hephaestus demigods to fashion a sheath for your dagger. It should be done by dinner, but for now, you'll just have to tie to your belt with some string or something."

The goddess graciously thanked the centaur and headed back to the Dining Pavilion where she had been in the morning only this time for lunch. Her eyes scanned at the options available. The lunch special decided by the harpies was to be wraps.

Calypso grabbed a plate from the stack and lined up in the queue for wrap fillings. She chose turkey, lettuce, cheese, tomato and mayonnaise. The newcomer wasn't sure were to sit so she went to go ask Chiron for help.

"Normally, I'd ask you to sit at the Cabin 11 table (Hermes), but… They're really full and you are a goddess so sit wherever you want.

"Thanks Chiron!" she said before going to look for Leo's relatives. It was a lot harder than she thought it would be. "I'm looking for short Latino boys with crazy hair and elfish qualities," she told herself. Kids of Hephaestus…"

It took her a while but Calypso spotted a table filled with burly boys. Their biceps, triceps, quadriceps and any other –ceps bulged from under their clothes. She held her breath and walked towards them, clutching her plate tightly.

"Hi~" she greeted them.

Every single one of their ugly heads turned around to look at her and it wasn't until then that Calypso realised that half of them were actually girls.

She helped herself to a seat but a boy slammed the bench with enough power for the table to vibrate as if there was an earthquake.

"This seat's for Chuck," he grunted incoherently in a caveman voice.

Calypso gulped as he stood up to reveal his full height.

"Mess with us again and you'll have to endure the wrath of the Ares Cabin," the caveman proclaimed.

'The children of Ares?!' Calypso screamed inside.
"He-he… Forget I was ever here…" she trailed, darting out of sight.

Calypso smacked herself in the head for being so stupid and mistaking children of Ares, for those of Hephaestus. If only she had asked a nicer bunch of fellows for guidance to the Hephaestus table instead…

But it was too late for all that now so the goddess decided to suck it up and go sit with Chiron or something.

When Calypso said that she was going to sit with Chiron at lunch, she didn't expect to have to put up with Mr D as well. It was bad enough not getting to know Leo's relatives, but she had to deal with an ill-tempered god of all alcoholics too?!

She watched as chunks of shredded chicken flew out of the mouth that he didn't shut when he ate. It was like a cement mixer in there! Microscopic specks of sweet chilli sauce landed in Calypso's hair but she had far too much etiquette to wipe it off.

Calypso sighed in relief when Mr D finished his meal only to see him create an elaborate goblet out of thin air.

"Dionysus," Chiron warned, "No alcohol, remember?"

"It's not alcohol. Definitely not wine," he said nonchalantly.

The centaur raised a sceptical eyebrow.
"In an 18 carat gold goblet? Have you ever heard of anyone drinking Diet Coke from such an ornate cup?"

Dionysus continued to feign his innocence.
"I just wanted to know what it'd feel like to drink diet soda from an overpriced container."

Chiron snorted,
"Is that so?" He detached his bow from his back straps and reached for one of his many arrows.

Mr D widened his eyes in shock and transformed his goblet of wine into a can of Diet Coke. He pulled open the top with a satisfying 'pop' and took a sip.
"It tastes like dryad urine," he complained.

"Wait, so it tastes like tree sap?" Calypso asked, confused.

This caused every single face on the table to give her a disapproving look. She didn't get how Dionysus was allowed to say that Diet Coke tasted like dryad urine but she wasn't allowed to say that dryad urine was basically tree sap. Personally, Calypso thought that her observation was a very logical and relevant.

The goddess soon decided to give up on good manners and gobbled her food as fast as humanly possible before hurriedly excusing herself from the table.

"Don't forget Calypso," Chiron told her, "The natural magic session will be at the Lake."

Calypso was extremely proud of herself for finding the Lake all by herself. 'But then again,' she thought, 'The Lake is the only prominent water feature of Camp Half Blood.' She giggled a bit. Somehow, she had managed to make the demigod camp sound like a tourist attraction.

She cautiously dipped her hand in the Lake just for fun. It was cool and relaxing down there and Calypso found poking the water surface rather amusing.

Before she knew it, both Mr D and Chiron turned up at the Lake doubting the sanity of the girl who was poking the water.

Calypso sprang up from her crouched position and straightened her dress to conceal all its messy creases and wiped her wet hand in the folds of the flowing skirt.
"I was just… Testing for any living creatures down in the Lake," she said slowing, continuing on with her fabrication."

"What an idiotic girl!" Dionysus taunted, "Fish don't swim that close to the surface. Besides, most of the animals down in that big puddle aren't even known to mortals."

Calypso looked into the water and made out two girls giggling at her. They poked their tongues out and pulled funny faces before laughing hysterically.

"They're making fun of your stupidity," Mr D told her.

Sorry it's so late. For some reason, my chapter didn't save so I had to rewrite it. But that's okay, because I made it even better than before! :D

BRING ON THE FLAMES, COS UNCLE LEO'S HERE!

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