A/N: Just wanted to thank all my readers! I know I totally suck lately. There's a lot coming up in the story and it's hard to figure out timing of everything. I appreciate those who diligently review and read!

And Militarywife thank you so much for your review! Long story short, much of what you said helped me to fix some horribly gigantic plot holes I've been noodling with for a very long time. Seriously, thank you for all you said, it helped me out a lot! Let me know how to get in touch if you ever want to chat about the specifics!

"Where's Avery?"

"She was just here."

"Averylin, it's time to go!"

There was no response from upstairs and Lindsay sighed. They were running late for the first day of school and she didn't have time for Avery's antics. A headache pounded behind her eyes and she was already upset that she wasn't going to fully enjoy her daughter's first day of kindergarten.

"I'll go find her. Get the boys into the car," Adam offered, coming back from the kitchen and handing her a Tylenol and coffee. "Then take that."

She thanked him with a smile and herded the boys outside while Adam went in search of Avery. She wasn't in the bathroom or the bedrooms so he started up the next flight of stairs, hearing some kind of clinking. Peeking around the bedroom door he found the little redhead sitting on the floor, using a spoon to scoop change from a coffee can into her purse.

"Hey Tink, what are you doing?"

"Jus' making some money," she answered with a shrug.

"Sweetheart, that money isn't for you."

"And just what is it for then?" she asked, hands on her hips.

"When that can gets full I take it to the bank and we use that money to help people that don't have things they need."

"Poor people? Oh. Well I am poor."

"Averylin."

"Yes?"

"This isn't for you. You need to put it back."

"Then how will I buy myself milk at snack time?"

"You don't need to worry about that sweetie."

She wrinkled her nose but dumped the change back into the can.

"Is it time for school now?"

"Yes it is."

"You like mine dressy? It was what mama weared when she first went to kindergarten too. It has a capatiller on it."

"Caterpillar."

"Castapiller?"

"Caterpillar."

"Oh whatever, it has one of those," she said, slinging her backpack over her shoulder before raising her arms so he would pick her up. "I cannot wait to see my buddy Nicholas. I have not seen him in most, most long."

"I'm sorry that play-date didn't work out."

"Oh, it is okay. That just means when we hug today it will be much bigger."

"Sounds good. You want to lock the front door for me?"

She nodded and reached down to twist the key in the lock.

"You are such a big girl," she whispered to herself. "You are ready, Avery."

Adam chuckled and kissed her cheek before settling her in the car.

"Okay kids, ready to go?"

He was answered with three enthusiastic voices and he reached over for Lindsay's hand, trying to read her expression.

"Babe?"

"Sorry, my head hurts. I didn't sleep well last night."

"I know. Were you nervous about today?"

"Maybe. I might be coming down with something, we'll see."

"What do you say to a nap once we drop them off?"

"I think that would cure everything."

They shared a smile and listened to the chatter of their kids in the back of the car, looking forward to the freedom they were going to have now that they were all in school.

"Yes! We're here!" Ben hollered. "C'mon sissy, I'll hold your hand."

"I'm not ready yet," she whispered, shrinking back into her seat. "I don't want to go."

"Sure ya do! Kindergarten is so great! And you get the teacher that I had, and Nicholas will be there and there's snack time too! Right Cole?"

"Yeah, kindergarten is the best. Don't forget you'll have recess too."

"My tummy feels funny. What if I throw up?"

"You won't Aves. It's just nervous. Come on, Ben will hold one hand and I'll hold the other and we won't leave you until we have to okay?"

"You swear?"

"I swear."

"Well okay then."

They all got out of the car and the boys took Avery's hands, walking with her up to the front door.

"Look Aves, it's the Messers too! See, you won't be alone at all with all us kids in the same school."

"Are you nervous Averylin?" Sarah asked as she approached.

"Yes but the boys say it will be fun."

"It will. Remember during the summer when we went on those rides at Coney Island? And while we waited in line you were so excited to go but you were scared too? Well that's what this is like. Once you get to do it, you'll find out it's not so scary, just mostly fun."

"Okay. Grown-ups, let's go in!"

Ten-strong, they trooped inside, stopping in the hallway by Avery's classroom.

"I want to wait for Nicholas," she said after a moment. "You big kids can go to class."

"No way," Isa assured, kneeling down in front of her. "We're staying here until you're ready. Why don't you just go in and say hi to your teacher?"

"Mama, come with me inside please."

Lindsay nodded and took her hand, leading her into the classroom while Ben and Junior followed, curious to see how the room had changed in the last three years.

"Good morning Averylin," the teacher greeted with a smile. "How are you doing today?"

"Well I'm just nervous."

"That's normal. I'm really glad you're here, I've been waiting a long time to have Ben's little sister in my class."

"I am glad for it too. Ben an' Daniel telled me that you was the best."

"I hope I live up to your expectations."

"Yes. Also, Ben said you was good to look at."

Ben groaned and covered his face with his hands while Junior burst into laughter and clapped Avery on the back.

"That was hilarious sissy Aves."

"It was? I wasn't even trying, Daniel."

"I'm gonna go be embarrassed outside," Ben said.

"Well it was good to see you, Ben."

"Yeah, I'm sure. Goodbye."

Junior laughed again, then leaned over to kiss Avery's cheek.

"Have fun. See you at recess or somethin'."

"Thanks Daniel. You have fun in your class too. Win all the sports."

He nodded and galloped off while Avery found her desk.

"Mama lookit! My nametag has a picture of our family! See there is me an' Thomas in your lap and daddy and the boys! This will make me so happy when I look at it. An' I got those pictures in my purse too, of Thomas an' Sarah an' my tea party with Mac an' Jo! I think I will be okay mama, I really do."

"Good. Want daddy to come in and kiss you before we go?"

She nodded and Lindsay got Adam's attention, motioning for him to come in.

"We're really proud of you honey. You're going to have so much fun."

"Yes daddy, you said that a'fore."

"Well I still mean it. Let me give you a kiss."

"How about a big one on my cheek?"

He obliged and held her close for a long moment before letting her go.

"You be good okay?"

"I will. Goodbye mama. Do not miss me."

"I'll do my best."

They ended up saying goodbye a few more times before Avery finally shooed them out of the room in favor of Nicholas, who arrived right before the bell rang. The classroom door closed and all four adults stood there staring at it quietly.

"So that's it huh?" Danny said, clearing his throat. "The last one has left the nest."

"Daniel!" Austin huffed, punching his arm. "She has not left the nest!"

"Then why are you two crying?"

"Because she walked in there like a little adult and yesterday she was a baby, that's why!"

"Aw, don't be so dramatic," Danny said, slinging his arm around her shoulders. "She's still the baby of the family."

"Yeah but she's not an actual baby and we're old," Austin grumped as they headed out of the building. "She's going to learn to use a pencil with her chubby little hands and she's going to write her name and do math and get kissed by boys…"

"How did you go from chubby hands to kissing boys Austin?" Adam demanded. "My baby is not kissing boys."

"Yeah, she's not kissing boys except for my son, that's who she's not kissing right?"

"She only did it that one time and he seemed not to mind if I recall."

"Okay, well your daughter is still way too brazen for her own good."

"Have you ever tried to tame a wild stallion Austin? Because that's Averylin."

"Having a stallion-like child myself, I will let you win that part of the conversation."

"Thank you."

They parted ways in the parking lot and Lindsay was quiet on the other side of the car. She'd been so hard to talk to about anything lately, not because she refused but because she always claimed to not know what she was thinking or feeling. It was possibly more frustrating than her depressive behaviors and all Adam could do was be patient and wait for her to speak. He wasn't sure it was time for tough love, though he kicked himself for not using it much in the past. He reached over and took her hand again and she curled her fingers around his with a gentle sigh.

"I'm okay. Just overwhelmed."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

"Let's go home."

She nodded quietly and stared out the window as he drove. So often her mind was halfway across the world, and on days like today, it was hard to focus on the present. The kids reaching milestones and having new experiences always caused her to reflect on Rebecca and everything she had missed.

While things with the adoption were still in limbo, they had been able to write a letter of intent to a judge, explaining why they wanted to adopt Rebecca and what kind of life they could give her. Normally that didn't happen until they were in country, and it was no guarantee that the adoption would be honored under the new law, but at least it was something.

"You want to stop for brunch? I know you didn't eat this morning."

"No thanks. Can't we just go home and go back to bed? Set an alarm for later?"

"Today we can."

She understood what he was saying and nodded.

"Just for today."

"Oh mama, mama, mama! It was most fun!" Avery squealed, running from the classroom and into Lindsay's arms. "I love kindergarten with all my heart! An' know what is so funny? I meeted a boy named Thomas! Isn't that hilarious?"

"Yeah, that is."

"I cannot wait to go back! Tomorrow?"

"The day after."

"Oh, so tomorrow I get you?"

"Yes, you do."

"Great! I am so very happy!"

"I'm glad, baby."

"Where is daddy?"

"He went to the other side of the building to get the boys from their classes. How was it being at school all day? Was it harder than preschool?"

"Oh no, not at all. Ben an' Daniel was right, that teacher is so great! She is very nice and she let me and Nicholas sit together! Everyone is friends and I love learning a great deal. Teacher was so impressed that I knowed how to spell so much stuff an' I told her that Ben teached me letters and sounds and Coley works on teaching me reading sentences. Also I can do much more math than the rest of the kids. She said kids don't learn fractions until Ben's age, but I told her I learned from cooking with you. And later we will do science and I told her about how daddy likes to teach me experiments and she said to me that I am very smart. Did you know that mama? Did you know I am smart?"

"Yes, I knew you were smart."

"Good. Being smart is useful. Would you please carry me? I've had a long day."

"Sure sweetie. I'm glad you're growing up but I like that you still want me to hold you."

"You look most gladder than when I leaved you this mornin'."

"Yeah, daddy and I had a long talk. That always helps me to feel better."

"Oh good! I've been a little worried 'bout you today," she confessed as they headed outside to the car to wait for the boys.

"Baby, it's not your responsibility to make me happy okay?"

"Oh. Okay."

"But just so you don't worry, I feel much, much better."

"Nicholas told me something very sad. He told me that his mom lives in one home and his dad lives in another now. It is a new thing. Sometimes he sleeps at his dad's home and other times, with his mom. They do not have an all-together family like what we got. He is so sad about it, mama. So very sad. I hugged and hugged him all recess. And then we comed up with a plan to see if his mom and dad would find love for each other again. It makes my heart cry."

"Oh Averylin, I'm so sorry. That's really tough on kids."

"Yes. Nicholas said that his mom and dad still love him very much, but they do not seem happy, just sad."

"Hopefully things will get better for all of them."

"Yes. Could we have Nicholas over soon? We can play and he will feel happier."

"Nicholas can come over anytime, we like having him around."

"Okay then I will let him know and his people will call my people."

Lindsay giggled and kissed her daughter's cheek, wondering how in the world such an amazing child had been entrusted to her.

"Boys! Hey brothers! Hurry up over here!" she hollered, jumping up and down and waving. They both rushed to her, Colton lifting her up in a hug.

"Did you have a good day?" Ben asked, once she was settled on the ground again.

"It was great! Did you boys have a good day too?"

Ben nodded enthusiastically.

"I love the first day of school."

"Yeah, it was good. Me and Isa are in the same class but we already got moved apart because our teacher knew we would talk too much."

"Well it's better that it happened before you got into trouble."

"In theory," Colton said, clearing his throat. "But remember that day a long time ago when you taught me and Isa to make paper airplanes?"

"I can see where this is going," Adam chuckled. "School is for learning, recess is for shenanigans."

"Don't worry, I'll tell Isa."

"You kids want to head out for some playtime at the park?"

"Whoo-hoo!" Avery shouted, jumping into the car. "I love this day!"

As ridiculous as it was to have a fire in the fireplace and be using the air conditioner at the same time, a sudden rain shower had forced their S'More making party indoors. It was easier to wrangle the kids this way and keep an eye on their smoldering treats. Adam was a little more worried about them being so close to the fire but Lindsay waved her hand off, trusting that the kids knew their limits.

"Ben if you burn it, you eat it," Adam said, settling into the couch.

"I won't gotta," Ben shrugged. "I'm gonna burn it until it is gone, gone, gone."

"And we have a pyro," Lindsay chuckled.

"Guess we'll keep an eye on him," Adam agreed as Ben watched his disintegrating marshmallow with fascination. "Hey, are we okay?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't we be okay?"

"Because I wasn't exactly nice to you…"

Lindsay shook her head and smirked.

"Adam, you're never not nice. You were right and I may not have loved it at first, but you were right. I'd be irritated with myself too."

"It's not that I'm irritated."

"Yes you were. And that's okay. I haven't been where I needed to be lately."

"I know you get lost in your head sometimes."

"I do, but that's no excuse for checking out and not being in the moment. You're right, I'm going to miss things with the kids if I don't start paying attention."

"I don't want to have to say those things to you again."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"Answer me one thing?"

"Of course."

"Are you sure you don't need to… you know, maybe have a session or two?"

"Maybe," she answered quickly with a shrug. "But I can't keep using that as a crutch every time things get a little difficult. I can't keep falling back on old behaviors. It's not good."

"No, it's not."

"I'm really sorry. I didn't realize how upset I was all the time."

"I forgive you. You're just going to have to start being a little more self-aware, that's all."

"I know. Thank you for telling me."

"You're welcome. I love you."

"I love you too. You are most wonderful."

He laughed and shook his head.

"You're most fabulous yourself."

She smiled and rested her head on his shoulder, her soul a little scuffed up from what he'd said, but no worse for the wear. Sometimes she couldn't see what she was doing until someone called her out on it. Usually Austin was the only one brave enough to do that, but she was glad Adam had beat her to it this time. As hard as it was to hear, she knew that he only said it because he loved her and that set things off on the right foot. A few years ago, the conversation probably could have gone a lot worse.

"Okay, I'm going to have to have one of these things," Adam said after a moment. "I thought I could resist, but I can't."

"Have fun, Averylin's been licking the marshmallows before she roasts them."

"Why… never mind."