Avery coughed again and rolled over in her bed, rubbing her nose with the back of her hand. Her eyes watered and she whimpered, reaching out for the small bell next to her bed, shaking it furiously. Lindsay appeared in the doorway in record time and Avery sighed to herself, as much as she could with a plugged nose and sore throat.

"Mama."

"Hey sweetie. What do you need?"

"Snuggles."

"I can do that. Anything else?"

"I want to go to school."

"I know you do, but it's not fair to spread the germs."

"When you gotta go to work?"

"As soon as daddy gets home."

"An' he will take care of me?"

"Of course. I already left him a list of when you had your medicine and how much so he'll know."

"Hurry up an' snuggle me before you gotta leave your only little girl what's real sick."

"Aw, don't make me feel guilty," Lindsay smiled, laying down on the bed and brushing Avery's hair back.

"Tell me a story, mama. A happy one."

"Like what?"

"Oh, 'bout you an' daddy! Yeah, tell me a story 'bout you an' daddy in love!"

Her enthusiasm was punctuated by a cough and Lindsay handed her a Kleenex.

"Thank you mama. Tell the story please?"

"I'm trying to think of one."

"You cannot remember when you was in love with daddy?" Avery asked, horrified.

"What? Baby, of course I can remember. I'm still in love with daddy, what makes you think I'm not?"

Avery sneezed and wiped her nose again before answering.

"Because you seem sad. Daddy too."

"We're just dealing with a lot of stuff. Daddy and I are still very much in love."

"Oh. I just thought… well I thought being in love means being happy always. You always was before."

"Love is a lot of hard work," Lindsay conceded after a moment. "Sometimes it's hard to do it the right way. Trust me kiddo, daddy and I still love each other."

"I guess so. You do hug an' kiss lots."

"Yeah, that's pretty fun."

"An' gross. So tell me a story."

"Did I tell you about the time daddy thought there was a ghost in our apartment?"

"Nope! Was it a bad ghost or a good one?"

"It wasn't a ghost at all. See, one night when I came home from work, all the power was out in the building. There was a storm outside and daddy thought it would be funny to try and scare me. He made up this story about the power going out and hearing a mysterious noise. He was so convincing that I almost started to believe it. There was thunder and lightning outside and daddy had his video camera running so he could catch the ghost on tape."

Avery giggled as she imagined the scene, her parents creeping around, looking for a ghost.

"Daddy kept telling me that he thought the ghost was behind a chair in the corner of the room and he wanted me to go check."

"Did you check?"

"At first I didn't. At first I told him he was being silly and he had no reason to be scared. Then he started asking me if I'd ever heard funny creaks in there before that and I started to remember that I had. Sometimes it sounded like a radio tuning or water dripping. I just chalked it up to the neighbors, but the more he talked about it, the more goosebumps I got. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and I had to go look behind the chair where he said the noise was coming from. Very, very slowly I crept over and peeked behind the chair."

"What did you find mama? What did you find?!"

"I found out that your daddy is a stinker. He had a remote controlled noise maker that he hid in the chair and he'd been setting it on a timer for weeks! When I looked behind the chair he had a stuffed gorilla sitting there with a handful of flowers for me."

"Oh that daddy," Avery chuckled. "He is so cute."

"Yes he is," Lindsay agreed, reaching over to check for fever. "Okay, it's time for you to settle down and get some rest."

"Mama?"

"Hmm?"

"I hope I don't get no one else sick."

"It'll be okay sweetie. Go to sleep."

Colton stretched and turned over in bed, trying to figure out what had woken him. It was late, his clock told him it was getting close to the wee hours of the morning and he yawned before listening for the sound again. It was Avery, coughing in her sleep. He knew it wasn't loud enough to wake his parents and he couldn't very well lie there and listen to her like this.

Being as quiet as possible, he threw his blankets off and padded out of the room, finding Avery half asleep, laying on her stomach and whimpering.

"My bubbles goed away," she said, pointing at the light up humidifier that had run out of water. "Daddy needs to fix it."

"It's okay Aves, I can fill it," he assured, unplugging it from the wall and taking the top off. He went into the bathroom and filled it up in the bathtub, then brought it back into her room, setting it on the stand next to her bed and turning it on.

"Thanks Coley. I hurt."

"I know. From coughing, huh?"

"Yeah. An' my throat."

"You want some honey, honey?"

They smiled at each other in the semi-darkness and she nodded.

"Please."

He scooted downstairs to get the honey, carefully returning with a spoonful for her. She put it in her mouth and let the honey coat her throat while Colton sat next to her and pushed her hair back from her forehead.

"Coley," she started after a moment. "Will you tuck me back in?"

Her request was ended with a cough, one that shook her body and didn't seem to end. Colton rubbed her back until it was finally over, then settled her blankets over her.

"Did you get medicine before bed?"

"Before my bath," she nodded.

Colton rubbed his eyes and took the medicine bottle into the bathroom, where Avery's dosage schedule was hanging on the mirror. He checked three times then filled the dosing cup up to the proper place.

"Here sweetie, you take this."

Avery nodded and took the cup, tossing it back then lurching forward as her gag reflex got the best of her. She immediately burst into tears and Colton reached for a Kleenex to wipe her face.

"Aves, it's alright," he assured, gingerly lifting the quilt off of the bed. "Just stay there a minute, okay?"

She nodded and sniffled while he took the quilt into the bathroom, running some water in the tub and tossing it in. He wasn't sure exactly what to do about it, but he knew that if he at least rinsed it off, it would be less work in the morning. Washing off as much as he could, he left it where it was and went back to Avery's room, pulling another warm blanket from her closet and settling it over the bed.

"There, snuggle back down. Let's not worry about the medicine for now. You can have a cough drop instead."

She took the wrapped drop from him and put it in her mouth, clacking it against her teeth.

"Coley?"

"Yeah Aves?"

"Could you stay with me in here? In case my bubbles go away again?"

"Sure."

"An' could you rub my back in circles how mama an' Jo do?"

"Okay."

"Thanks Coley. Ben would not have cleaned up my spit out medicine. He would have throwed up hisself."

"Yeah, that's why I am going to be the doctor and he's not."

"You can practice on me. Being a doctor an' all. You can get a tetherscope and listen to me breathe."

"Stethoscope," he corrected with a grin.

"Yes, that."

"I'll stay with you, Aves. Go back to sleep."

She sighed and snuggled into the mattress while he lay down next to her, deep in thought. He really did like taking care of his sister, or anyone else for that matter. It made him feel good, important, grown up. It made him feel strong, like he could solve any problem thrown at him. Nothing else made him feel quite like that. It was a help, especially now, when everything in life seemed to be whirling out of control.

He rolled onto his side and pressed his hand to Avery's forehead, feeling for a fever. She seemed fine for now and he pushed her hair back from her face, over and over again until he started to yawn, feeling the effects of the long day. It had been hard to get back into the swing of school after winter break and he wished that he'd done some more of the extra credit work his teacher had given them beforehand. He needed to get good grades this year so next year when he went to Junior High he could take more advanced classes. Everything counted now. He knew that college was expensive and he'd researched enough about med school to know that there was no way the family could just pay for it out of pocket. He needed to get scholarships, grants, and anything else possible to make his way through school. A lot of that started now. He had to start doing better. He had to become a doctor, the best one the world had ever seen. He needed to become a doctor so he could help kids like Rebecca, who were dealt a difficult hand in life and needed a little break. If he couldn't do that, then how else was he supposed to ever make any of this better?

"So which one?"

"Huh?"

"Which one is better?" Isa restated, turning the stereo down. "Nirvana or Black Sabbath?"

"What? Oh, sorry. Um, Nirvana I guess."

Isa frowned at her best friend and rolled off of her bed, flopping onto the floor next to him.

"I'm over here having an existential crisis and all you can say is "I guess?" Geez Colt."

"Sorry, I'm having a little crisis of my own, but I guess that takes a backseat to the musical ramblings of Isa Messer."

"Whoa, uncalled for!"

"Sorry."

"I'll forgive you because you brought gummy worms. What's up?"

Colton sat up, leaning against the chest of drawers, closing the top one with his head.

"I'm tired, Isa."

"Tired of what?"

"Not of anything. I mean just for real tired. I feel like my eyeballs are going to pop out of my head."

"That's gross Colt."

"I slept in Avery's room last night. I figured my parents needed their sleep and she's pretty high maintenance when she's sick so I just stayed in her room with her. She snores really loud and moves a lot in her sleep. And as cute as she is and as much as I like taking care of her, she really deprived me of sleep."

Isa smiled slowly and nodded.

"There's something else, isn't there? You can tell me if you want."

"You'll tell me I'm stupid."

"I tell you that anyway Colt," she smiled, reaching over to touch his arm. "What is it?"

"It's just… I don't know. I guess I'm still sad about Rebecca."

"We all are, Colt. It's okay."

"I know. And I don't think I'm not supposed to be sad, I just wish it would get easier. I wish that it wasn't on my mind all the time. I really just wish that she was here, or that we knew she was okay."

Isa was quiet for a while; it was so hard to think of anything reassuring to say. She had enough conflicting emotions of her own and she wasn't sure what she could do for Colton. It was the first time she could remember not knowing what to say. Even when the kidnapping had happened, she could always think of something that might help. But this time, it was too big for her mind to wrap around.

"I love you, Colt."

"I love you too."

"I wish I could make it better."

"I know. And I know there's nothing we can do now and nothing we could have done differently before to adopt her."

"But it sucks that you can't change it anyway huh?"

"Yeah. I get so mad, Isa. I hate the whole world sometimes. I don't care that Rebecca was different than other kids. What I hate is that because she's different her birth parents couldn't take care of her. Because she's different, no one wanted her. Because she's different she doesn't get to be loved. And it's because people thought different was wrong. That makes me mad. Because you know what? It's because of people being scared of different that she'll never come home. It's not because she's different it's because people don't like that. And I just wonder, how could anyone not love that little girl?"

"Oh Colt," Isa sighed, sitting up and pulling him into a hug. "I don't know."

"I always talk about being a doctor because I want to fix people, especially kids. But I don't think it will make much difference. I can't fix everyone. And you know what Isa, it's not about being sick or healthy, or being typical or not. What is the real disease that no doctor can fix is the disease in people's hearts."

"Hate," Isa agreed with a nod.

"Yeah. Hate. Even our parents can't fix it. They spend their whole lives trying to catch criminals who do things because of hate. They put them in jail and try to fix things but they can't. There's too much hate and nothing can fix it, Isa. Nothing."

"I know," Isa replied softly. "But that doesn't mean we give up. Who knows what kind of miracle could happen in our lives Colt?"

"That's true. There's just some days that I feel like giving up. I'm twelve years old and I already want to give up on the world."

"Sometimes I do too. I understand the angry."

"I knew you would."

She dropped her head to his shoulder and took his hand, lacing their fingers together.

"I don't know what else to say Colt, except that I'll always be here for you and you'll always be here for me and there's no hate involved in that. You're my best friend in the world, you always will be."

"You'll always be mine."

They fell into silence, one that was familiar, having been the third entity in their friendship since the beginning. Before they could talk their communication was through babbles and hand movements, silence had been a vessel to carry meaning. Now silence meant "I'm here. I see you."

"Colton and Isabeth, dinner's ready!"

"We'd better go out there, my ma only starts yellin' louder if we don't hop-to."

"I wonder if she learned that from my mama or the other way around."

"Oh boy," Isa chuckled as they stood up and made their way to the kitchen. "They're exhausting."

"Who is?" Lindsay asked as they came around the corner.

"You and ma."

"Cheeky. C'mere you."

Isa wrinkled her nose as she was pulled into Lindsay's arms, her face sprinkled with kisses.

"Aw geez Indy!"

"What, I haven't seen my girl in two weeks!"

"But-"

"Sorry I need to kiss you again."

"Do you do this to Sarah and Daniel?"

"Sarah doesn't fight it so it's not as much fun and Daniel fights it harder than you do and he's getting strong."

"There's me, average again."

"I love you."

"Yeah I know."

"Hey wait a minute!"

"I love you too Indy."

"Good, now let's eat. Adam made brownies for dessert."

"Oh great."

"Hey!" Adam defended, coming out of the kitchen. "I slaved away on these and you'd better appreciate them."

"I'll try it first, Is," Colton promised. "Make sure he didn't use too much salt this time."

"Takin' one for the team."

He smiled as they sat down together at the table. Their talk hadn't fixed anything but it had helped him to sort things out. A little bit of weight was lifted off of his shoulders but he knew, there was so much more work left to do.