Chapter Sixteen: Memphis, meet your kitties

~Ninja's POV~

"I still think I should check to see if Sasori is alive." Analia grinned. Deidera snickered silently as his Danna twitched slightly. Analia was a bit too suspicious but she was good at making Sasori-danna uncomfortable. Amaya smacked her head.

"Down girl. You're supposed to be setting a good example for Keira."

"I am setting an example for her. I'm showing her the proper way to get a-" Ariel slapped a hand over her mouth. Kakashi was grateful to see that Ariel was still able to function next to their, in their words, 'hotness'.

"So where will we be sleeping? I'm not sure if you made it so we could change back into a human Amaya-san." Sakura asked respectfully repeating Yahiko's earlier question.

"It's just Amaya Sakura, either that or Maya. I'm not one for formalities." Amaya said waving it off. "As for your sleeping arrangements…" Amaya sighed thinking about it.

"They could sleep at my house." Ariel suggested.

"If you don't mind we'd rather stick together." Nagato said politely.

"With how often you're home I don't think that it would be a good idea." Amaya chimed. Ariel shrugged.

"It was just a suggestion." Sasuke noticed that Amaya only had to look at Analia out of the corner of her eye for a brief second before dismissing her as an idea. He unconsciously relaxed at the thought of not being anywhere near the 'fangirl'. (He wouldn't say that out loud in case something bad happened.)

"Well… Team 7 can have the living room to themselves." Amaya said. "The couches should be enough for Sakura and Naruto and Kakashi and Sasuke can have the air bed."

If you don't mind I'd rather sleep in the kid's room." Kisame said.

"I agree with him." Kakuzu grunted staring at Keira who was peeking out from behind Amaya's waist and curiously staring at Kakuzu's stitches before moving behind Amaya again once she saw Kakuzu was staring at her.

"That's up to Keira and Memphis." Amaya said sounding amused. She looked down at Keira barely hiding a smile.

"Memphis will probably allow it." Analia said dismissively. "The little brat is part animal himself. Kisame and Kakuzu should be no problem."

"Hidan, Deidera, Sasori, and Itachi can sleep in the guest bedroom. Nagato, Konan and Yahiko can have my room."

"It wouldn't be right for us to take your room after everything you have done for us, Amaya." Konan interjected softly.

"Seriously, we'll be fine in the library." Yahiko agreed before Amaya could protest. "It's… quieter."

"I have a feeling I'm going to regret not choosing the library sooner." Amaya sighed but let them win this argument.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Hidan protested when he finally thought their sleeping arrangements through. "We have to share a room with the Uchiha fu-" The glares that Analia, Ariel and Amaya sent him made him shiver in fear; he quickly back-tracked seeing Keira's eyes on him. "Uchiha?" He finished lamely.

"They are going to kill him." Sasori stated matter-of-factly. Itachi wondered if Amaya knew that Sasori was speaking a half-truth since he could plainly see the glint in the puppet user's eyes. One he did not like, but since he was an Uchiha he kept silent.

"He can stay in Amaya's room then." Analia said quickly. Amaya glared at her.

"It wouldn't seem right since Amaya doesn't have to share with anyone. She can spare half her bed." Ariel agreed smirking at the glare Amaya gave her. She just stuck out her tongue like a child. The ninja watched as Amaya had an internal war with herself over that.

"It would also make sure that should Hidan and Deidera get too out of hand he can intervene before they destroy that part of the house." Nagato said, not looking at Itachi as he stared at him. Was everyone aware of his… 'fascination' with the witch? At least he knew Sasuke-

"Itachi doesn't snore, nor will he hog any blankets." Never mind.

"Fine." Amaya sighed giving up. Kakashi noted with amusement as Amaya glared at everyone who had spoken. "But I hate all of you."

"Tell us something we don't know dear." Analia said lightly. Itachi couldn't help the slight feeling of betrayal he was feeling, but that was over shadowed by the tingles that Amaya caused when she looked at him.

"The kids have school tomorrow. So I hope you either find some earplugs or are a very heavy sleeper." Itachi nodded remembering Amaya's futile attempts to sleep in. Not that she complained all that much about it. "It's been a long weekend."

"And it'll only get longer once your aunt comes." Ana snickered as Amaya stiffened.

"Mommy's coming home?" Keira asked coming out from behind Amaya for the first time to stare up at her.

"Yes she is baby. But I don't know when she'll be back." Kakuzu had a feeling that Keira would be jumping around with Memphis if he was awake.

"Speaking of which, we should get moving before Auntie comes and finds more ninja than necessary." Ariel said. "Unless you want to host a sleepover."

"The last time we had a sleepover none of us slept all night." Amaya said. Sasori really hoped that they didn't have a sleepover in case they ended up being raped. From the looks Analia was giving them, it was a very real possibility.

"Yes we were busy doing other things." Analia grinned. "Like trying to beat each other at Naruto Ninja Storm 3."

"There's a game about us?" Naruto asked feeling pride well in his chest.

"Better believe it kid." Amaya said. "Don't play with Analia, she cheats."

"Oh come on! Everyone knows that Sasuke may be a dick, no offense intended, but you can't deny he's powerful! He is Indra's incarnation!" Analia cried. Sasuke ignored the jab at him and focused on the compliment.

"The only person who could beat him was Naruto and you made sure that we didn't pick him." Ariel seethed. Naruto smirked at Sasuke's scowl.

"You had Pein, you could've chosen him! Or hell even Kisame would've worked. Sasuke could probably kick their asses but not without a good fight." Nagato and Kisame semi-glared at that comment.

"I don't know how to control Pein or Kisame. I suck with them. The only person I can play well is Kakashi and even then Sasuke copied most of his jutsu's. So relatively speaking without Chidori and its modifications, Sasuke is practically worth nothing without it." Ariel said. Kakashi felt very much vindicated in that moment that someone had the sense to mention that.

"Bullsh*t!" Analia growled. "You're just mad that you suck. And if I remember correctly you said you wanted time to practice with Naruto so you didn't even pick him when you had the chance."

"Besides Naruto there's no one else who could beat that little prick, no offense intended." Ariel said not sounding very apologetic. Naruto was too busy enjoying the look of Sasuke's face to get mad over the fact that he had lost to him in a game. Besides he could kick his ass in real life and would have if they hadn't ended up here.

"Enough!" Amaya ordered. Sasori noted that while Ariel seemed like the leader of their little group, it was Amaya who called the shots when they were together. Amaya grinned. "And if I remember correctly then Itachi was half dead and half blind while also bleeding out when he let Sasuke win."

"Oh yeah…" Ariel nodded as Analia sighed in defeat. "He cornered him…"

"Next time we're playing that game I'm going to prove to you whose stronger." Analia vowed. Amaya nodded before stating,

"Alright, but I call dibs on Itachi and Naruto. And no you cannot use the excuse about Naruto spamming his clones. I didn't start sh*t about you using Sasuke's Sharingan excessively so shut up and man up."

"Dammit." Ariel smirked. Keira chose that moment to ask a question.

"So he's sleeping with you?" Keira asked looking at Itachi. Amaya only nodded as Kakashi noticed with some amusement that Itachi and Amaya had briefly stiffened at the wording and at Hidan and Deidera's snickers.

"He's only sleeping in there." Naruto said, sounding like the careless idiot he usually was. Keira seemed to think about it before nodding her head slowly.

"Jay said you two are compatible."

"Jay?" Sakura asked.

"The baby?" Yahiko questioned. Keira nodded not having a problem with Sakura since she smiled at her.

"Jay said that you and Darknado were a good match too. And that Dark Knight and Maya were-" Amaya covered Keira's mouth.

"Please don't finish that sentence Keira. I'm afraid of what those three are planning." Nagato could clearly see the smirks on Kisame, Konan, and Sasuke's faces at Keira's words. He mentally sighed at their childishness. Why should they concern themselves with Itachi's love life was a mystery to him. It was obvious Amaya was going to be the one dragging her feet. (When did his Akatsuki turn into a matchmaking service?)

"Speaking of planning." Analia said slowly sharing a glance with Ariel. "We should be researching if Team 7 wants to get home in time to save everyone from the Moon's Eye plan."

"Is that still in effect?" Sasuke asked.

"Probably not but we aren't exactly versed in the ways of time-travel." Analia answered, shrugging. "While we have time-traveled it takes a certain amount of magic and a clearance level that only the Elders can give out with permission."

"You've time traveled before?" Kakuzu asked.

"Why not just use that method to get us home?" Sakura asked.

"Whoa, we haven't done this before." Ariel clarified.

"Like she said, only the Elders know that magic." Amaya said. "The last time someone time- traveled… they ended up rewriting World War 2."

"Not to mention creating the Bermuda Triangle." Analia muttered.

"The what?" Hidan asked.

"Nothing you need to concern yourself with." Ariel answered cheerfully.

"You guys should really look up our history since you're going to be here now." Analia commented. "Maya should have some books in the Library." Amaya tensed slightly while looking into space for a second.

"Memphis is waking up." Amaya reported. "I'm going to go tell him his cats are now full grown ninja and want to sleep in his room."

"Good luck with that." Naruto said. Amaya smiled briefly before picking up Keira and walking away. Kakuzu and Kisame didn't hesitate to follow her.

"It's kind of endearing that Keira managed to wrap Kakuzu around her little finger." Analia said.

"You think that's cute? You should've seen him when Keira started crying the other day, un." Deidera snorted. "I've never seen him run that fast, ever."

"The f*cker was practically begging her to stop." Hidan said. Analia and Ariel shared a look before they stood in front of the ninja. The ninja instantly recognized the look of someone in a relaxed defensive stance.

"As much as this is a dream come true for us we'd like you to just know one thing." Analia said in a tone laced with steel. "If you hurt Amaya or the kids, nothing in this universe or yours will keep us from ripping you to shreds."

"Bear in mind that we aren't Animorphi like Amaya." Ariel said. "And we don't take kindly to people taking advantage of our family. If you should do a 'Sasuke' then I will show you what Hell looks like." Nagato and Kakashi didn't need to use their respective 'kekkei genkai' to see the literal flames that seemed to lick at Ariel's bared skin.

"We understand." Yahiko stated, for once completely serious.

"Yeah what soulless person would hurt kids like Keira and Memphis?" Naruto asked feeling outraged that they would say that.

"'Sasuke'?" Sasuke asked.

"We can't exactly pack all of the things you did into one word so we just use your name." Ariel actually sounded apologetic at using his name like a curse. Bear in mind that he understood but it still stung. He'd been 'clean' for almost a month now. (That was progress in his book).

"You don't have to worry about us doing anything to hurt Amaya." Konan said. "We may be ninja but we do have some honor. Amaya has taken care of us when she could have just given us away. To repay that with back-stabbing is not something I can tolerate."

"Us too." Yahiko and Nagato chimed seeing her glare. Konan may seem like the quiet one but she wasn't an idiot. She was the only person who could keep Nagato and Yahiko in line after dealing with them for years.

"Naruto wouldn't let us." Sasuke said as an explanation. Sakura and Kakashi nodded while Naruto looked pleased that Sasuke was taking him seriously after all these years.

"Why the f*ck would we attack someone like Amaya?" Hidan asked. "I may like killing but that doesn't mean I'll kill an unarmed child. Besides, Kakuzu would rip me to shreds." He muttered the last part but it didn't escape the ninja's notice.

"I like those brats, un." Deidera said. "And Sasori-danna may not say it but he likes them too, yeah." Sasori just nodded once. No one even had to get Kisame and Kakuzu's answer since those two had taken to staying near the kids since the Disturi attacked.

"So I guess that leaves Ita-" In the place that Itachi had once stood was now only open air.

"Where'd Itachi go?" Naruto asked looking around wildly.

"Itachi left after Konan gave her speech." Kakashi drawled already reading Fifty Shades of Grey a third time.

"Oh. Well alright then." Analia said waving him off.

"Aren't you going to hunt him down to give him the same f*cking speech?" Hidan asked.

"Meh, Itachi is too nice to kill some random child." Ariel said dismissively.

"So how do you intend to research on getting us home?" Sasuke asked already moving past his brother's absence.

"I need to go look into some files at HQ first. They should all be in the Back Room." Analia said.

"You know only the Heads of Divisions can go in there." Ariel said.

"Not just them." Analia smirked tapping her chin. "How do you think I found out where the last colony of Phoenixes is?"

"Don't they have top of the line security?" Ariel asked as they walked out of the living room already intent on helping Team 7.

"… Did she say Phoenix?" Naruto asked dumbly when the rest of the ninja found themselves alone.

"Yes dobe, she did." Sasuke sighed. Some things never changed.

"Oh." Naruto nodded before announcing, "I'm going to read that Encyclopedia!" With a quick shunshin he was gone.

"In that case I want to ask Amaya about the second book to this." Kakashi did his version of a shunshin.

"He's the weirdest ninja I've ever met." Yahiko said. "An orange ninja I can understand but a lazy, perverted ninja? Even Jiraiya-sensei was a bit more enthusiastic." Sakura looked at Yahiko in surprise.

"You were trained by Jiraiya-sama?" Yahiko looked surprised before he grinned.

"Oh yeah. And let me tell you, I cannot believe that Naruto was the first person to nickname him Ero-sennin. That takes genius thinking right there." He laughed.

"Hn." Sasuke highly doubted that Naruto had been a genius when he'd been twelve. He could barely beat him in a fight at that age.

"I wish it wouldn't sound like another Itachi,un." Deidera sighed plopping down on the couch beside Hidan. Nagato and Konan had returned to watching Scream when Analia and Ariel had left the room. Sasori had chosen that moment to go look around in the kitchen at the different kinds of potions that Amaya brewed on occasion.

"He's a f*cking Uchiha. What do you expect?" Hidan asked, before yelling at Ghost Face about what a pansy-assed momma's boy he was for not being able to catch a single female.

When Kakashi arrived in the children's bedroom Amaya and Keira were telling Memphis about his 'cats'. Since he hadn't seen Kakuzu, Kisame or Itachi in the room her figured that Amaya hadn't gone into details yet.

"Come here baby boy." Amaya said. Memphis' hair was sticking up at odd angles making him look slightly deranged. Memphis only nodded before plopping himself on Amaya's lap and allowing her to gently comb his hair.

"Memphis guess what?" Keira asked excitedly.

"What?" Memphis asked catching his sister's excitement. He started to bounce around while Amaya had to grab his hair to make sure he stayed in one place.

"Oreo, Sleepy, Kit, Darknado, Pinky, and the others aren't really cats at all!" Well I guess Keira was better at telling her brother these things since Amaya let her continue. "They're really ninja! And they're really tall! Especially Oreo!"

Kisame suppressed the urge to chuckle as Memphis' eyes widened as Keira demonstrated how tall she thought he looked by standing up and reaching her hand as high as it would go.

"And Sleepy is only this tall." She lowered her hand to her neck. "Everyone else is in between but they're all tall and really nice! But Sparkle cusses a lot." Kakuzu would have to sew Hidan's mouth closed if he couldn't even keep Keira and Memphis from figuring out what he was saying. "But Oreo has really blue skin and he looks like a shark!"

"Really?" Memphis asked looking at Amaya.

"Yes he does. You should see his gills." The look on Memphis' face was of absolute awe.

"And Beauty has a lot of stitches and he looks scary with his green and red eyes but I think he's actually nice." Kisame, Itachi and Kakashi couldn't help the slight twitch of their lips when Keira said that about Kakuzu. Kakuzu on the other hand was wondering what part of him made the brat think he was nice? "Brittany looks like a girl too!"

Amaya started laughing so hard she almost lost her grip on Memphis.

"That- That's not- That's not nice." Amaya gasped in between her laughter.

"But he does! He has longer hair than I do!" Keira stage-whispered to Memphis. Kisame would be telling Deidera about this later. If only to annoy the blond. "Dark Knight has long hair but he doesn't look like a girl. Although he does look pretty." Amaya seemed to laugh harder at that. Itachi didn't know whether he would be thanking Keira for making Amaya laugh so hard tears were coming out of her eyes or if he would be ignoring her for the next few days. "Dark Knight is really silent and so are Sleepy, Scarecrow and Cutie. Oh and Scarecrow reads those adult books that Amaya reads when she's bored too."

"Ew!" Memphis scrunched up his cute face making him look even sillier.

"I know. But I think Scarecrow is Kit, Darknado, and Pinky's father. He certainly looks like it." Kakashi wondered if he was going to have to sit down and talk to Keira about that, just to clear things up to the poor confused child. "Cutie, Rose, and Chucky are best friends too. I think."

"They are." Amaya said, finally done with her laughing fit.

"Are they like Dom?" Memphis asked. The ninja were making a mental list of all the things they would have to ask Amaya not that they could talk. Amaya nodded.

"Yeah, kinda. But I don't think that they're going to want to be cats for a while. I think they missed being human."

"Aw! But I liked sleeping with Oreo. He was warm and he always purrs when I have a bad dream." Memphis cried sounding so sad that Kisame almost considered asking the witches to change him back.

"Well, if you want Oreo can sleep in here." Amaya said hesitantly. Kisame perked up. "Oreo and Beauty want to ask if they can sleep in here with you two."

"To keep us safe from the monsters?" Memphis asked.

"Yeah."

"It'll be like a sleepover." Keira said to reassure her brother.

"You should probably have them ask you first. It's up to you two if you want them to sleep in here with you." Kisame and Kakuzu took that as their cue to come out of the 'shadow'.

When Memphis' eyes landed on Kisame he was half afraid that his little friend would reject him as being too scary and that he wouldn't want him anywhere near him. As it was he did see a hint of fear in Memphis' eyes at the sight of him. But that was only for an instant before Memphis' eyes seemed to shift into an emotion Kisame wasn't all too familiar with.

"Memphis, meet Kisame. And the man beside him is Kakuzu. Kakuzu is Beauty and Kisame is Oreo." Amaya explained patiently. Memphis still didn't move.

"They won't hurt us Memphis." Keira said staring at Kakuzu. Memphis frowned. Before Kisame could wish that he'd never come out Memphis looked at Keira.

"I know that Keira. I'm not stupid." Memphis looked back at Kisame before smiling. "Hello Kisa! My name's Memphis, it's nice to meet you." Then Memphis did something Kisame hadn't been expecting. He got off his bed before running to stand in front of him. "You are tall! But that's okay because that means that you can protect me and we can be best friends!" Memphis then smiled. Kisame had no idea how to take this and the sudden warmth in his chest at the innocent smile.

"You should say something." Amaya's whisper was low enough for only the ninja to hear. Kisame flashed her a smile before getting on one knee in front of Memphis.

"Hello Memphis. It's nice to meet you too." Memphis grinned before launching himself at Kisame and hugging him tightly.

"Hehehe, you look like a shark. But that's okay, sharks are good too." While Kisame and his brat had their moment Kakuzu was still wondering how to broach the subject of Keira and her distance with him.

Turns out he needn't have worried. As soon as her brother was showing that he was comfortable with the shark man Keira got off the bed to stand in front of him. She still looked shy but at least she wasn't running away terrified.

"Yes brat?" Kakuzu barked. Her eyes widened. Kakuzu mentally berated himself for that and was just about to return to the shadows when a warmth in his hand made him look down. Keira had put her small hand in his but didn't look up at him. Kakuzu looked at Amaya only to see that she was just looking at the wall. Kakuzu looked down when Keira tugged his hand. He reluctantly got on his knee to stare at her. Keira met his eyes shyly.

"I'm sorry I'm shy... But… I really like your stitches…" She mumbled.

Well these brats seemed to be good at making the two of the most cold-hearted Akatsuki member's hearts melt. Kakashi mused as Kakuzu and Keira held hands. He might have imagined the small sqeeze Kakuzu gave Keira's hand but then again he never missed much with his lone eye. Memphis on the other hand seemed to be chattering away like Naruto when he was younger.

"You can sleep right here okay?" Memphis was telling Kisame when he and Itachi came out of the shadows.

"Those two are special." Itachi murmured.

"Hmm." Kakashi agreed.

"What do you expect?" Amaya asked. "Their mother taught them to have an open mind. And I taught them to give people a chance before they judge them. I'd say they learned that lesson very well."

"I suppose I don't need to tell them to 'look underneath the underneath'." Kakashi said.

"You can. But they probably won't get it until a few years down the road." Amaya said. "Which reminds me." Amaya looked at them. "Since you two aren't doing anything and the kids seem to be playing with their newfound 'pets' you two get to help me get everyone settled in their rooms."

"I would love to but I do believe that someone needs to make sure Sasuke-" Kakashi didn't even have time to finish his excuse to get out of work when Amaya's sharp voice cut him off.

"If you don't help then you don't get the second book." Kakashi eye smiled.

"-doesn't interfere while Itachi and I help you. Let's get to work then shall we?" He snapped the book closed and practically dragged Amaya and Itachi out of the kid's room. Not that they were paying them any attention since Memphis and Kisame were playing cars and Keira had talked Kakuzu into playing with her on the tablet.

"You do realize the mess you've created?" Itachi asked. "He'll only help until he can find the hiding place for the second and third book."

"I know. But I know that he also doesn't have the magic to unlock their hiding places." Amaya smirked. "Kakashi stop. The blankets are in the hall closet."

When Itachi's eyes opened to feel arms wrapped around him his first instinct was to tense up. At least until his consciousness reminded him exactly who he was sharing a bed with and under what circumstances. That was when he looked down to see Amaya's smooth face on his chest and her arm around his waist.

It was ironic that someone so uncomfortable with the opposite sex had no problem cuddling up with said opposite sex at night. He'd learned that while Amaya did have walls she was a cuddler in her sleep. She instantly latched onto the nearest object she could; which had been her pillow until Itachi had come. Not that he was protesting much.

He glanced up at the ceiling wondering when the last time he'd reveled in human contact this close was. (The last time had been when Sasuke was still a child and his innocence was still intact.) He'd had no idea how much he'd missed having someone close in the morning until now. It was… nice.

His eyes darted to the clock beside the bed.

4:55 am.

The children would be waking up at 5:00. Amaya would need to wake up soon and cook them breakfast before taking them to school. Their weekend was over which meant that things would hopefully settle down. Having two Disturi in the house was exciting enough.

But Itachi could revel in this warmth for a while longer. He had five minutes, and Amaya didn't like waking up early anyway. He closed his eyes intent on making this last for as long as he could.

"YOU F*CKING ASSHOLE!" His eyes snapped open revealing his Mangekyo Sharingan. (Why did he think that he would have any peace with Hidan and Deidera only one room away?)

"ME?! YOU'RE THE ONE COOZYING UP TO ME YOU STUPID RELIGIOUS BASTARD, UN!" Itachi felt Amaya tense up. She was awake.

"I WOULDN'T BE IF YOU HADN'T TAKEN THE F*CKING BLANKETS YOU F*CKING SHE-MALE!"

Amaya was out the door in seconds leaving Itachi planning the painful things he would do to them both once he was alone with them. Tsukuyomi was good for one thing.

"WILL YOU TWO F*CKING SHUT THE HELL UP!" Amaya yelled before the screams sounded.

"OW!"

"SH*T, UN!"

On the other hand maybe Amaya would hurt them enough that he wouldn't have to risk blinding himself again. With that Itachi rolled over and went back to sleep relishing the sounds of the two idiots who had dared to wake Amaya.

"Well at least we know this certainly won't be boring." Kakashi drawled when everyone was downstairs after having been awoken by the screams of Hidan and Deidera being flayed alive. The two in question were now in the living room being tended to by Sakura and Kakuzu.

"Maya? Did you have to hurt Dei and Hidan so badly?" Keira asked while eating her pancakes. Sasuke could clearly see the twitch Amaya had when she turned around, fully dressed and in a bad mood. (Mentally he applauded her on a good job. He had no doubt that those two idiots wouldn't wake the whole house by screaming at each other like that again.)

"Yes I did honey. Now eat your food or you'll be late. Don't forget to get your jacket and backpack." Naruto shivered slightly at the sweet tone in which she said that. It seemed Sakura wasn't the only female he'd have to worry about.

"When are you going to leave?" Sasori asked.

"In about five minutes." Amaya answered. "Keira stop messing with Sasori's strings and eat your food. Memphis get your backpack."

"I don't know where my backpack is!" Memphis cried getting up and running out of the kitchen.

"It's under your bed." Kisame said following after his little buddy. Before Keira could run and get her bag Deidera came in with her jacket and bag.

"Here Keira, yeah." Sasori noted that the brat didn't look at Amaya when she glared at him. It amused him that the brat was going to have to play 'nice' for a while.

"Thanks Dei!" Keira said before looking at Amaya. "I'm done!"

"Memphis is coming," Kakashi said aloud. He knew he didn't have to say anything but he figured Amaya would give him the third book if he was a good boy. (Never thought I'd be repeating that phrase, Kakashi thought idly.)

"Do you mind if I come with you?" Naruto asked Amaya pleadingly. Amaya blinked in surprise at the sudden request.

"Uh… You know it would probably be best if you didn't-" Naruto waved her excuse off. If he didn't go with her then he would surely die by Sakura's punch and Sasuke's Amaterasu.

"You can put a genjutsu on me. Or better yet, I'll do one." Naruto said quickly.

Naruto, what did you do now?" Kakashi asked not putting his book down. He was pretty sure that he was going to need some copies of this book. Naruto gulped and scratched the back of his head nervously.

"Well… let's just say Sakura isn't going to like it. And neither will Sasuke." Itachi noted that Amaya's face changed slightly as Naruto did that. A slight smile came to her before she rolled her eyes.

"Fine, you can come."

"YES!" Naruto yelled before picking up Keira and Memphis, who had come in right on cue, and rushing out the garage door. "We'll be in the car."

"That brat is loud but he sure is amusing, un." Deidera snickered as a vast amount of KI rose.

"You know it'll be better if you stay clear of them." Kakashi said looking up. Amaya waved over her head already opening the door.

"Naruto is cute. There is no way in hell I'm going to let Sasuke and Sakura kill him before I get a chance to spend one day with the man. It's bad enough he's already taken but at least I can be friends with him." The door closed.

"I think someone has some competition." Hidan grinned. Itachi turned to him and Deidera.

"You woke me up." He stated simply. Before either could run they were instantly caught in his Mangekyo Sharingan. In the real world they collapsed after a second.

"Was that wise Itachi?" Nagato sighed finally deigning to speak. Itachi only shrugged as Sasuke and Sakura came in leaking KI.

"Where's Naruto?" Sakura growled.

"He went with Amaya to drop the kids off." Yahiko stated happily.

"That moron is dead the second he walks in." Sasuke stated.

Kakashi sighed. "What have we told you about revenge Sasuke?" Sasuke's eye twitched.

"-so I took a picture and put it in the bathroom on the mirror." Naruto was explaining his prank to Amaya as they pulled up to the very large and dark castle.

"You should have made copies and put them around the whole house." Amaya laughed. Naruto grinned liking her sense of mischief.

"Maybe next time."

"Alright kids, it's time." Amaya said as they unbuckled themselves. Naruto helped Keira out of her 'car seat' and made sure that she looked presentable. Not that he was one to judge. His attention kept getting caught by the large, heavily decorated castle and the ominous feeling he kept getting. The castle spooked him the hell out.

'You survived Madara and the Juubi but you still get scared by a haunted castle?' Kurama growled. 'What did I do to have you as my Jinchuuriki?'

'It's ghosts Kurama! Ghosts haunt you for life and there's nothing you can do to fight them!'

'You're an idiot. Ghosts aren't real.'

'You also said dragons, witches, and magic wasn't real.' Naruto shrieked.

'Hmph... So I was wrong once...'

"A-Are you sure i-it's safe?" Naruto asked seeing a light wave back and forth in front of the giant double doors.

"Don't be scared." Keira said holding his hand. "The ghosts and zombies can't come out here to hurt you." Yeah there was no way in hell Naruto was ever coming back here again.

'ZOMBIES!'

"The school's been here for centuries Naruto. If it wasn't safe we would have closed it down a long time ago." Amaya said. "Good luck!" Keira and Memphis waved good-bye before running off to their respective groups of friends.

Now that he wasn't looking at the school anymore, Naruto could see the groups of adults that were staring at him and Amaya. Thank God he was under a Henge.

"Uh, what's with the staring?" Naruto asked not seeing any signs of hate or fear. It was more like awe, confusion, and surprise. Amaya sighed.

"They're probably whispering about you. Or more specifically, what the hell I'm doing with you."

"Eh?" Naruto asked getting back into the car.

"I'm not exactly a big fan of being around guys. People, especially the older generations, all know my aversion to guys my age. They're probably wondering if we're together or if you're gay." Kurama started roaring with laughter.

'That would make sense since you've never really kissed anyone but the Uchiha!'

"I'm not gay!" Naruto yelled outloud. Amaya laughed as they started driving back to the two story white country house Naruto had seen as they had left.

"I know that. But they don't."

'Not cool Kurama.'

Amaya sighed. "People are going to be coming around a lot in the next few days." Naruto guessed that Amaya really didn't like her family for their prying ways. Not that he did either, but to actually have family that gossiped was, strange. And involuntary.

"So what's with the school being a freaking castle?" Naruto asked instead.

"Well after the Witch Trials in the 1600's, after peace was finally settled and everything was on track, the Elders decided that the younger generation should learn with other family witches so they built Magic School. Every year generations of kids attend the school to learn everything they can. The school actually has 12 levels inside the whole castle."

"Seriously!" Naruto asked thinking of the dark castle. "It didn't seem that big!" Amaya smiled.

"It's enchanted Naruto. There's a level on every floor and on every floor is everything that the level would and could ever need. They usually take an elevator to whatever level they're currently on."

"Oh. But why have 12 levels?"

"For each grade. The Elders decided to go with 12 levels for every year starting at six years old. Every witch graduates once they reach seventeen. Once they graduate they're put into a team of three for a year or longer. Most of us go solo, but a few occasionally stick together if they want to. But the castle has been there for all of us. It's the safest place on earth and also the most powerful."

"The castle is powerful?" Naruto asked trying to think of the castle using a Rasengan. Amaya seemed to guess his thinking as she chuckled.

"Not the way you're thinking. But the school is so full of magic that if any demon or bad spirit tried to attack they would instantly be purified and die. Demons can't breathe inside the pure magic of the School. There's a story about why that is but no one knows if it's actually true of not." Naruto was instantly enchanted about the fact that there was a story in this. The only reason he could stand to hear about his childhood was because Amaya was a good story teller. Magic seemed to exude from her voice and make him attentive and feel everything she was describing. (Hell his life story had even gotten Sasuke to treat him a little friendlier.)

"What's the story?" He asked eagerly.

"Well, supposedly a girl named Catherine Harmon fell in love with a demon a few centuries back. Catherine showed him all about her world and just what magic was to her. In return the demon stopped killing innocents and stopped being evil in apparently loved each other, but when the other demons found out that one demon was making it with a witch, they whispered a bunch of lies to him. Demons aren't exactly known for being loving creatures, they prefer lust. But Catherine's demon, she insisted, was different. He loved her and nothing would ever change the way she felt. Not even her parents warnings could dissuade 's demon was swayed by the doubt, fear and anger that Catherine was only using him and that she was unfaithful to him. No matter how many times Catherine said that she loved him, the other demons told him that she was only lying to weaken him. I guess over time Catherine grew tired of telling him that she loved him and only him and that she would rather die than be without him. One day, he finally snapped." Amaya's voice lowered making chills go down Naruto's spine. "He said that Catherine was only a little harlot and that she didn't care about anyone but herself. Catherine told him that he was weak for believing what the other demons had told him was true and that if he couldn't see what was right in front of him then he was only another shallow demon. His first attack was on the School and the next generation of witches. Catherine was so enraged that she ended up fighting with him for a whole week, never stopping to think through her grief. They pretty much destroyed the whole landscape and half of the sea. But Catherine's demon managed to get in one good shot before she was able to eventually stop him. She put a spell on the School so that no demon, half-demon, or evil spirit would ever be able to enter the holy grounds and sway another witch with his or her charms. She used every ounce of her magic to make sure that her mistake was never repeated by the generations following her. And to this day no other witch has ever fallen for a demon." Amaya shrugged. "But since we don't exactly have a record of it no one's really sure if it's true of not. Not even the Harmon family is sure."

"But if it's not true than how else could the shield around the School be proven?" Naruto asked.

"In the beginning the School's Headmasters put every powerful protection spell on it in case any demons tried to get in. A few have tried but none have succeeded. The story, I think, was made to frighten the younger ones into never falling for a demon."

"So it's possible?" Naruto asked.

"I guess. But no one's ever fallen for a demon. They always end up killing us before we even say one word to each other." Naruto thought about that. Mentally he couldn't help but wonder if that applied to him and Kurama as well. He did love Kurama but more as a friend. Kurama had certainly pulled his weight, but Naruto was guessing that not all demons were like that; especially since he had no clue about the demons in this world, other than the Disturi. This witch business sure was a pain.

'Don't even compare me with this world.' Kurama growled. 'Especially to those... things.' Naruto mentally nodded.

"So if the school is a castle, does that mean what Keira said was true. There are ghosts in it?" Naruto asked trying to distract his mind from any more thoughts of demons. Amaya's evil smile was enough to distract Naruto.

"Oh yes. You should see the Ghost of Holly. She was killed by a banshee and so she never stops wailing. Especially when she sees a boyfriend being unfaithful. Then there's Bloody Mary. Oh you don't want to get her mad, she'll end up dragging you into her mirror world and killing you." Naruto paled.

"B-But… there are friendly ghosts right?" Naruto squeaked. Maya looked like she was thinking it over.

"I suppose there's Jasper. He's the friendliest. But even he won't stop to help if you get caught in his trap. The goriest one I've ever seen was him chopping off the head of a kid who was walking down the stairs. Now the kid wanders the halls with a broken neck and scaring the crap out of anyone stupid enough to ask him anything. And don't even get me started on the Bloody Count of Aramid. He usually comes over every Halloween... Oh, Halloween is in a week, times gone by fast." Through all that Naruto was only get more and more scared and pale.

'Huh... I guess I was wrong about ghosts existing. With your luck they'll end up coming to see us on Halloween.'

When the car came to a stop in front of the house Naruto practically ran out of the car and into the house.

KAKASHI-SENSEI!" Naruto yelled. "WE NEED TO GET HOME RIGHT NOW! I DON'T WANT TO MEET THE BLOODY COUNT!"

"What?" Kakashi asked looking up from his book. But Naruto was already jumping onto Nagato.

"SAVE ME NII-SAN! DON'T LET THE GHOST GET ME!" Naruto wailed. Everyone turned to Amaya seeing her walk in. She raised an eyebrow.

"What? Someone had to tell him about the ghosts that come over on Halloween. And don't even get me started on the Pumpkin King. He tends to lose his head when the Headless Horseman comes around with his pumpkin head." Naruto 'eeped' and hugged onto Nagato tighter.

"Stop being a dobe. She's just joking." Sasuke said. Sakura would have hit Naruto earlier but seeing what Amaya did to Naruto while they were gone, was actually much more satisfying.

"Y-yeah…" Naruto stuttered still not letting go of Nagato.

"Come on otouto, let's go get you some ramen." Nagato sighed as he took Naruto into the kitchen. Hidan and Deidera started laughing as well as Kisame, Yahiko and Sakura.

"Nice one!" Hidan laughed feeling tears in his eyes.

"I almost fell for that, un!"

"I can't believe Naruto was that gullible!" Sakura giggled.

"What are you talking about?" Amaya asked sitting next to Itachi looking confused.

"You lied to him." Kisame grinned. "Don't be so modest, you got the blond idiot to look like a freaking child!" Amaya blinked.

"I wasn't lying Kisame." Amaya stated seriously. "The Headless Horseman comes back from Hell every Halloween to find his head; he chops the heads off anyone who's too slow to run from him and his demon horse, which would be everyone now that I think about it. The Pumpkin King comes around to check on the Halloween spirit and if you don't participate he kills you in the bloodiest way he can(1). Last year he fed a human teacher to a pack of young werewolves, a woman who was too ashamed of Halloween ended up being put through the shredder, and a little boy's parents ended up having their tongues ripped out because they told him Halloween was a stupid holiday." The laughs died into awkward silence. "Which reminds me, I'd better find me and kid's costumes." Amaya winced. "I don't want to end up losing my head again." She got up and walked to her library.

"... Someone f*cking tell me she was lying." Hidan said in the silence that followed.

"I'm not sure if she was or not." Kakashi said slowly as they all looked at each other. In a flash everyone was running for the Encyclopedia.

GM NASAI: Mwahahahahaha. Halloween is the craziest time of year and what better way to have the witches celebrate it in the most... unorthodox way possible? And I can't wait to have the ninja participate. I know in real life we're a couple weeks away from Christmas but I was feeling a little 'Nightmare Before Christmas' on this chapter. I even managed to get in a little ItachiXAmaya in there. ^.^

I was going to add more but after seeing that this is my longest chapter so far. I figured why not end it here. If I go any further everyone will be expecting me to write more than 5,000 words in every chapter. Plus I didn't really do a Ninja POV for a while so this is me making it up to you all. I hope.

(1) I just know that this is in a movie but I can't remember which movie it was in! It had a little 'kid' with a pumpkin mask over his head following a bunch of different people and killing them in crazy ways. Or maybe I've just watched too many Supernatural shows? O.O

**You know I am getting kind of worried. I've put up 16 chapters and only 23 reviews for this... Maybe I should set you guys with a challenge? If you give me ten reviews then I promise that the next chapter will have the Halloween bit in it. Give me fifteen and I can have the Pumpkin King and the Headless Horseman have a duel which could be joined by Hidan since he is immortal. Ja'ne!