(1.5) Opening up
-x-o- Callie -x-o

I gave Mum a hug and whispered my apology for worrying her. She held me tightly and sighed. "Darling girl, you have to stop this." I nodded into curly hair and knew everybody else was staring at us. "We will figure this out and things will get better soon."

"I know, Mum." I sighed as we pulled apart and saw that her brown eyes were watery. I felt so bad and I didn't know how much it would hurt her. I wanted to hurt Stefanie. "I wasn't thinking."

"You are very right with that one, bug." Mum laughed as she put her hand softly on my cheek to stroke it. "You are very intelligent and sensible so please use it." I nodded again and turned my attention to my siblings.

"I would like to talk to you three." I said softly as I pointed to Mariana, Jesus and Jude as Brandon sat there drinking his orange juice with a shock face. "Later on about why you shouldn't drink underage and should never drink then drive." They nodded and I looked over at Stefanie who finally looked a little more relaxed as she grabbed herself a coffee. "I am going to lay down for a bit." I whispered and went upstairs fast as I could. I took off my clothes and put on some comfy clothes then laid down on to the bed.

We were sitting in the therapist's office for the first time and I couldn't resist but hold Miss Lena's hand. "Aw bug." She cooed softly as she wrapped her arm around my tiny body as I leaned into her.

"Miss Lena.." I whispered as I looked up at her concern frown and she waited for me to say something. "I don't want to.. I want to go back home." She sighed as a lady came out of the doors with a smile on her face.

"Callie Foster?" She looked over at me and walked over slowly as my grip on Miss Lena got tighter as the lady knelled down to match my height and over her hand to me. "I am Ayda, it is nice to meet you." I hid my face into Miss Lena's jacket as I heard Lena sigh.

"I am Lena Adams, I have been taking care of Callie." I heard Miss Lena introduced herself and she tried to stand us up but I refused.

"Yes, I believe we spoke over the phone a few days ago."

"That's right.. Come bug." Miss Lena offered her hand to me as Miss Ayda stood up and took a few steps back to seem less threatening. I slowly took her hand and we slowly walked into the room Miss Ayda walked in. It looked colorful and not what I expected. My attention turned to the big bear in the corner and I looked up at Miss Lena.

"Bear!" I whispered softly and Miss Lena smiled down at me as she let my hand go and I ran towards it. I sat on it and looked over at the two adults who took seats on the big seats. I slowly gazed my eyes to Miss Ayda who looked like any other person in the room. She had jeans on and a white plain shirt on with relaxed long brown hair.

"Callie." Miss Ayda whispered as she smiled at me as she knew I was watching her. "Would you like a drink?" I slowly shook my head as she poured a tea for Miss Lena and herself. "You are very pretty, sweetie."

"Am I here to talk about Stefanie?" I whispered softly and Miss Lena looked shocked but Miss Ayda didn't seem too fazed.

"If you aren't ready, we can talk about something else. And we can get to know each other today." Miss Ayda answered softly with a smile as she took a sip of her tea then placed it down onto the table. "Cookie?" She pointed to the bowl that had choc chip cookies but I shook my head. Miss Lena looked worried because I wasn't eating much or drinking much, I was worried too because I knew I had to eat but I just couldn't because I knew I wouldn't keep it down for long. I felt so uneasy, scared, sad and anxious.

"Miss Lena?" I walked over to her and she sat me on her lap as she faced me towards Miss Ayda. "I want to go home." I kept my eye contact to my run down pair of converse and Miss Ayda sighed.

"You don't have to eat the cookie, I won't make you." Miss Ayda whispered as she got my eyes to look at hers with her index finger gently. "Like I won't make you talk about stuff that you don't want to talk about. I am here to help you."

"I want to go now." I hopped off Miss Lena and ran to the door.

"It's okay." I heard Miss Ayda whisper to Miss Lena. "She feels confronted and just needs to get to know me. I am a new person in her life." I felt Miss Lena touch my shoulder and we walked out to the car. She quietly help me to put me in the booster seat and strapped me in.

"I am sorry."

"Why, bug?" Miss Lena whispered as she stroked my cheek with a smile on her face and I shrugged my shoulders not knowing how to answer her. She sighed and kissed my cheek. "I just wish you weren't in this situation and that's why we are here. So you can learn to cope and to live your life like a normal child can."

"Normal.." I whispered and she looked at me as she took my hand into hers.

"I meant like a child who hasn't been through something as rough as this." I nodded to that and she smiled at me as she closed the car door to get the drivers seat to drive us back home.

"Callie?" I heard a knock at the door and saw Stefanie standing there. "Can we talk?" I sat up with a sigh and pointed to the desk chair next to Mariana's bed. "I want to hear you."

"You want to hear me?" I questioned slowly as I pointed to my chest with confusion and she nodded. "What do you want to know.."

"I want to know how much this has effected you and to know if there is any little bit of room in your heart for me eventually." I sighed as she took a seat on Mariana's desk chair. "Please open up just a little.. It will make you feel a whole lot better to know that I know how much this has effected you."

"I was just a child." I whispered under my breath as I looked into her big blue eyes for the first time. "I needed my daddy as much as I needed a mama. I needed you both and for you to take him like that.. I don't know if I ever will give you what you are asking of me. You are so selfish, so incredibly selfish." Her eyes widen and I looked away to wipe my eyes from the tears that have formed

"I wish this never happened, Cal." I heard her sigh softly and I looked back at her as I saw tears had rolled down her eyes too. "I miss him too."

"How you could you miss someone you murdered." I whispered and saw her flinched like that word stabbed her. She shook her head slightly and I looked away from her. "I was just a child."

"I know, baby." She croaked out as I could hear the tears in her voice. "You were only a child.. You didn't asked for anything bad to happen to anyone. You are still such a beautiful, mature person."

"I want my daddy back." I looked at her with eyes that were filled with tears and she looked hurt by it. "I want.. I want the last ten years of my life back to be a kid."

"Oh baby-"

"You took my daddy and you made me fearful." I yelled as I stood up and pointed towards her. "For years, I couldn't sleep. I couldn't eat. I couldn't drink. For years, I could not be a child because I lived protecting myself from everybody who I thought were bad." She started to cry and I cried too. "Hours of therapy. Years of never having a good enough sleep. Multiple unexplained fits of anger outbursts and never being able to go to school again until I could feel emotionally strong enough to complete high school."

"Callie-"

"And you want to know if I have any room in my heart for you?" I whispered as I wiped my eyes and looked at her tearful blue eyes. I stood there as my body weakened as I waited for her to say something but I guess she was waiting for the answer. "You took an invisible knife to my heart when I was child and took that piece of me away when you did what you did. So no. You cut that piece of my heart out yourself and lost it." I sat down on my bed and put my head into my hands.

"I still have it." She finally whispered after a long silence of us crying softly. "And I will mend it no matter how long it will take."