The young girl was crying during recess. She wasn't crying in front of anyone, she had more pride than that. She'd hidden herself around the corner of the school, with her back against the school wall.
The elementary schooler had a head of long, blond hair and clear blue eyes that were just slightly slanted. She hugged her knees against her, as her tiny frame shock occasionally.
"Why are you crying?" Asked a soft voice. The girl's body tensed as she realized she was no longer alone.
"I'm not," the girl said, her voice harsh from crying and embarrassment. "Go away." Silence followed and for a moment the girl thought maybe the other person had listened to her. She peeked over her knees.
She was a girl too, smaller than the blond, maybe younger. She had a brown ponytail and her blue eyes were looking at her with concern.
"I said go away," the blond repeated, her voice filled with venom. It had no effect on the brown-haired girl, who continued to stare at her. "Are you deaf?"
"No," the brunette answered simply.
"Then go away, I want to be alone." The brunette stared at her for a moment and then bit her lip.
"I probably should," she said finally.
"Good, then…"
"But the problem is I don't know what else to do," the brunette continued. The blond scrunched her eyebrows.
"What?"
"I've already messed it all up so…" The brunette shrugged. "Plus, I don't like seeing you cry."
"I wasn't crying," the blond repeated.
"Right," the brunette said before sitting down next to the blond. She was so close their arms brushed and the blond nervously scooted several inches away from her, which the brunette ignored.
"So what were you crying about?" The brunette asked after a moment. The blonde opened her mouth to tell her for the third time that she wasn't crying, but for some reason decided against it.
"Just classmates being stupid," she said instead. The brunette nodded like she understood completely. Now that the blond thought of it, she'd never seen this girl before. It wasn't a terribly huge school either.
"Kids can be fucking pricks," the brunette said, causing the blond girl's eyes to go wide.
"Yeah," she said back, trying to sound unimpressed with the brunette's knowledge of cuss words, images of her dad's curse jar flashing in her mind.
"Did they not like your book bag? I think it's cool," the brunette said. The blond blinked in confusion. How could she know that? The blond had had the same book bag since kindergarten, a pink Jigglypuff one she'd thought was cool but now dreaded putting on every morning. Mom refused to buy her a new one, though, since it was still fully functional.
"How did you know that?" The blond asked.
"I'm in your class," the brunette said, though the blonde knew she definitely wasn't. "My name's Max by the way."
"Chloe," Chloe said, still very confused.
"Chloe, I like that," Max said with a smile. Despite herself, Chloe found herself smiling back. Max had a nice smile.
Chloe stumbled out of the front doors of Blackwell, her eyes desperately scanning the front lawn. At this point she wasn't sure if she was looking for Max or Nathan, but she was pretty sure she didn't want to see either.
Some small, rational part of her brain begged her to go back inside and head to the bathroom, but the rest of her seemed only capable of stumbling around drunkenly.
"Earth to Ms. Price," Ms. Grant said beside her. She glanced over to see the science teacher watching her with a clipboard in hand.
"Oh, sorry Ms. Grant, have a lot on my mind at the moment," Chloe said.
"You ran out of my class like a bat out of hell."
"Sorry, you know, nature called."
"Well, if you have a minute I'd like you to take a look at this petition…" Ms. Grant began, but Chloe waved her away.
"Petition? Not my kind of thing Ms. Grant."
"It's about your…Mr. Madson's plan to put security cameras around campus. Now Blackwell is a…"
"I'll sign," Chloe said immediately, taking the clipboard. Pissing off the step-douche was something she could always get behind, and he'd blow a gasket when he saw her signature on the petition. Just the thought of it brightened up her day a little bit.
"Are you okay Chloe? You seem a little on edge," Ms. Grant asked as she took the clipboard back
"I'm fine, really, catch ya tomorrow," Chloe said as she stepped away and turned towards the lawn. Her heart was starting to calm down which was good, she'd been afraid it was going to pound right out of her chest there for awhile.
"Hey Chloe," Brooke said as she passed her. She was half looking at her, half looking at the tablet in her hand.
"Hey Brooke," Chloe said back. Brooke was as much her friend as Justin was, which meant Brooke was one of the few people that talked with her at school. Brooke seemed to think that, since they were both girls who liked science, they should get along. Chloe didn't really think that made much sense, but she dug the purple streak Brooke had in her hair so she didn't argue.
"You done going to the bathroom, want to give my drone a try?" She asked. Chloe had to admit, flying a drone did seem hella awesome, and she could use a pick-me-up.
"Hand it over nerd," Chloe said. Brooke took her through a run down of the controls and Chloe was surprised how straight-forward it all was. In no time at all Chloe had the drone flying around campus.
"What kind of drone is this?" Chloe asked, wondering what it'd take to get one herself.
"A HiFly drone, model B400 EVO," Max said. Chloe jerked.
"Fuck!" She continued as she lost her hold on the tablet.
"Chloe!" Brooke yelled as Chloe ungracefully juggled the tablet for a couple seconds before getting hold of it again. "Are you okay?" Brooke asked.
"Y-yeah," Chloe managed to get out as she glanced over and found Max standing right beside her. "Just almost hit a tree," she mumbled as Max looked back at her, an innocent smile on her face. Chloe glared at her, but that only seemed to make Max smile wider.
"Well don't, it's kind of expensive," Brooke said nervously.
"Right, no problem," Chloe said, but she was barely looking at the screen anymore. Her eyes were on Max, all her senses going into overdrive as her brain desperately tried to figure out how it should be responding.
"Chloe?" Brooke asked after a moment, breaking Chloe out of her paralysis.
"Yeah?" She asked as she wrenched her eyes off Max and turned to Brooke.
'You're, uh, flying straight up now," Brooke said, pointing at the tablet. Chloe glanced down and saw only clouds on the screen.
"Shit," Chloe said. "I think you better take this back." She handed the tablet back to Brooke, who took it with a relieved look on her face. "Thanks Brooke."
"Sure," Brooke said, but Chloe couldn't help but notice she didn't offer another drone flying session. She grabbed her bag and walked away, noticing Max following behind her out of the corner of her eye. She walked further down the lawn till she was certain Brooke wasn't paying attention to her anymore. Then she whirled on Max.
"I told you to go away," she spat at the girl.
"I did," Max said. Chloe just gestured at her presence, too dumbfounded and pissed off to form coherent sentences. "Oh, well I came back of course," Max clarified.
"Why?" Chloe pleaded, desperate for this nightmare to end.
"Sorry Chloe, but I still have some things I have to do," Max said, almost sounding sad. Chloe opened her mouth, a thousand questions forming in her mind, but then clamped it shut.
This isn't real. You're better now Chloe. You don't need Max. Chloe reminded herself. She exhaled deeply, turned on her toes, and starting walking towards the parking lot. She didn't turn around to check if Max was following. She was.
"Are you going to your truck? That's a good idea," Max said beside her. She tried to ignore her, she really did, but curiosity finally won out.
"Why is that a good idea?" Chloe asked with a sigh.
"Well, you didn't meet up with Nathan. Thanks for that by the way, you have no idea. But, I don't think Nathan's going to be too fucking happy that you stood him up. Probably best to get off campus and let him cool off." Chloe glanced back at the school doors.
"Fuck, you think so?" Chloe asked. Max shrugged.
"It's possible," she said. Chloe opened her mouth, but then slammed it shut again. No Chloe, this is exactly what you were trying to avoid.
She picked up her pace. She didn't really think she could run away from Max, she existed in her head or something like that, so it was one of those 'you can run but you can't hide' kind of things. That didn't mean she wasn't going to try though.
"I'll see you later Chloe!" She heard Max call out behind her. She stopped dead in her tracks, the simple promise sending waves of panic through her. She turned around and wasn't at all surprised that Max wasn't there anymore.
By the time she made it back to the truck she was dying for a cigarette. Actually she was dying for something a little stronger but tobacco was all she had and she'd settle for it.
Her hands shook slightly as she held the cigarette up to her mouth and lit it. She breathed a small sigh of relief as the smoke smell filled her truck. Now, next stop on the Chloe sanity train.
She picked up her phone and dialed Rachel.
"Wondered when I'd be hearing from you," Rachel said when the call picked up.
"I'm ready for girlfriend time," Chloe said as she sunk into the seat of her truck.
"Bad day?" Rachel asked. Chloe silently weighed the pros and cons of telling Rachel everything and then decided telling your girlfriend you might be going insane again probably wasn't a great choice.
"No worse than normal," Chloe said.
"Well, I'm at the junkyard waiting on your ass, get over here."
"Yes ma'am!" Chloe said with a smile and hung the phone up. She put it down, buckled on her seatbelt and started her truck. When she looked up she noticed Nathan coming down the parking lot steps, his eyes scanning the cars. When he saw her truck he started heading right towards her.
No big deal Chloe, you wanted to talk to him anyway. This works out.
Is what she thought, but instead her foot hit the gas and she sped across the parking lot at record speeds. At least record speeds for a rusted, barely alive truck. As she pulled away, Nathan started screaming, waving angrily at her. When he did, she noticed something metallic glint in his hands. Chloe's eyes went wide when she realized he was holding a gun.
"Holy shit, that was close," Chloe muttered to herself as she pulled out onto the street and sped away.
"Yeah it was," Max said from the passenger seat.
"Son of a bitch!" Chloe cussed, her hands squeezing tightly on the steering wheel as her heart went into overdrive. At this rate she was going to have a heart attack before the day was done and they'd probably blame the cigarettes on it.
"You need to stop doing that," Chloe said, completely pissed off. Was this just going to keep happening?
"I can't help it," Max said unsympathetically.
"Oh, don't act like you didn't enjoy it," Chloe said darkly as she rolled down her window and threw what remained of her cigarette out. Beside her Max giggled. For a moment all of Chloe's irritation and apprehension vanished as a thousand memories flooded into her mind, memories of a time when she would have done anything to hear Max laugh like that.
For a moment, and then it was gone.
"What are you doing in my car, Max?" Chloe asked flatly.
"Are you going home?" Max asked instead, ignoring Chloe's question. Chloe glanced over at her. She was staring out the window, watching the buildings as they flashed by. The smart thing to do would be to ignore her, fake it till she made it, till Max went away again.
"No, I'm meeting up with Rachel in the junkyard," Chloe found herself saying instead.
"Oh," Max said, sounding surprised. She glanced over at Chloe. "Yeah okay. Could I, maybe, ask a favor then?" Max asked. Her face didn't look too optimistic about the idea.
"You can ask, I don't promise to give it," Chloe said back. Max nodded.
"That's, yeah I understand that. Could you meet me by the lighthouse later tonight, a little before the sun sets, when it's really bright?" Max asked. Chloe blinked, completely caught off guard by the question.
"Can't you just appear wherever I am later?" Chloe asked.
"No, it has to be there."
"Alone or can I bring Rachel?" Chloe asked. Like hell she would ever consider bringing Rachel to see her imaginary friend, but she was curious what Max would say.
"Umm, alone would be better. So we can talk about some things."
"So what am I going to tell my girlfriend who just drove from Portland to be with me?" Chloe asked.
"I...don't know," Max admitted. She sounded completely dejected now and some part of Chloe's heart broke a little, but the rest of her ignored it.
"So I'm just supposed to abandon my real life girlfriend to go watch the sunset with my not real, ex best friend? And I thought I liked to get high," Chloe said sarcastically.
"Just...consider it okay? I'd appreciate it."
"You know what I'd appreciate, if you would just fucking…" Chloe paused as she realized Max wasn't there anymore, it was just her in the car. "...leave." Chloe finished, feeling more pissed off now then when Max was there.
Chloe reached down and turned on the radio. She turned to the loudest song she had and cranked up the volume.
Chloe was smoking when she walked into the junkyard. It was her second cigarette since Max vanished again, her third since leaving Blackwell. She needed something stronger. She headed through the tangle of broken metal until she arrived at the her and Rachel's shack. She walked up to the open doorway and knocked on the side of the wall.
From the coach inside the shack, Rachel looked up at her and smiled. She was as gorgeous as ever and just seeing her melted away some of the unease Chloe was feeling.
"So what has Rachel Amber been up to today?" Chloe said as way of greeting.
"Getting supplied for the week," Rachel said with a smirk. She reached down beside her and brought up a plastic baggie that was delightfully full. Chloe took her cigarette out of her mouth and threw it on the ground, stomping on it with her boot.
"I knew I loved you," she said with a smile.
"I do know the way to Chloe's heart."
They moved up to the boat, the highest part of the junkyard. They brought a blanket and pillows and made themselves comfortable on the deck, staring up at the sky.
"What else did you do? See anyone?" Chloe asked as she rolled the first joint.
"Frank, when I got us this," Rachel said.
"No one else?"
"No. I was going to you know? But for some reason I just couldn't get into it," Rachel said. Chloe flicked her lighter and held it up to the joint as she breathed in a couple times. She passed the lit joint to Rachel who accepted it gratefully. "I don't know, it just feels like my life here is just some distant dream, like it happened to someone else. Coming back here, it's so surreal. I feel like if I just pinched myself hard enough I'll wake up in my bed in Portland."
"Well, I'm glad you won't," Chloe said as she started rolling her own.
"It does feel good being with you again Chloe," Rachel said reassuringly. "So what was your day like?"
Chloe didn't have much to say about her day, at least not when she cut out all the parts that involved Max. Talking to Rachel about school made her feel like a child. Who wanted to hear about high school when you were out in the real world?
Instead, Chloe changed the subject to what Rachel was up to in Portland, a subject that Rachel quickly latched on to. She talked about her small apartment that cost way too much, her crappy job working at the salon, learning how to cook because she couldn't live off takeout forever, and her modeling gigs.
The last subject was easily her favorite. Chloe had heard most of this, but talking about it in person beat the shit out of talking about it on the phone. Rachel hadn't gotten anything big, just a couple magazine ads, but her whole face lit up as she talked about it. Chloe marveled as she watched Rachel, mesmerized by the passion in the girl. There wasn't a single thing in her life Chloe cared about as much as Rachel cared about modeling.
As the conversation continued, however, Chloe couldn't quiet a growing sense of unease. Rachel had a whole life in Portland already and it was only October. It would be months before Chloe could join her. What was she even supposed to do when she got there? She could go to college, maybe get into some kind of science program, but four more years of school seemed pretty lame compared to Rachel's life. What else could she do? She was so desperate to get out of Arcadia, but she was starting to realize she had no idea what she wanted to do once she did. Eventually she fell completely silent, just listening to Rachel talk and watching the sun slowly make it's way further and further through the sky.
"So what was Max like?" Rachel asked suddenly. Chloe glanced nervously around, almost afraid talking about her might summon her. She breathed a sigh of relief when she didn't see even one strand of brown hair.
"What are you asking that for?" Chloe asked.
"Well she was your ideal friend, you said so. Makes me a little curious. What does Chloe's ideal friend look like?" Rachel asked with a slight giggle. Chloe was still on her first joint, not finding it as appealing as she thought she would. Rachel, however, was well into her second and was starting to act like it.
"I don't know, the opposite of me," Chloe said, irritated at the conversation.
"Opposites attract, kinky," Rachel said with a wide smile.
"Dr. Strong thinks Max represents everything I wish I could be. Like I'm always upsetting people, can't keep my mouth shut, but Max was always real reserved and quiet and would try to get me to see the best in people."
"Mhmm, what else?" Rachel asked.
"She was artistic. Like, I'd walk out back and I'd just see the backyard, barely even notice it. But Max would stop me and tell me to bend this certain way and look right at this angle and suddenly I'd see this blade of grass or some shit with a drop of dew on it that was reflecting the both of us with the sun behind us and it would just be like fuck, that's beautiful. Like, that just made my whole fucking day and not in a million years would I have noticed it."
"She sounds pretty awesome," Rachel said.
"She was," Chloe said quietly. The sun, she noticed, was getting pretty low. Another hour and the sun would start setting. "Have you seen your parents?" Chloe asked. Beside her, Rachel's smile faltered.
"No," Rachel said, sounding a little annoyed.
"They're going to find out you're in town if they haven't already. You should probably stop by before they get pissed," Chloe said.
"Is Chloe Price giving me parent advice?" Rachel said, getting closer to angry than irritated now.
"I'm just saying, you could get it out of the way. I'll get all my homework for the week squared away, then we can spend the rest of the week just doing shit like this," Chloe said. It wasn't a lie, she really would do all her homework tonight even if she had to go without sleep. It felt like a lie though and part of her hated it the moment it left her lips.
Rachel glanced over at her and then got up to her feet. "If that's what you want to do," Rachel said coldly as she flicked what was left of her joint out and over the boat.
"Rachel…" Chloe said, getting up on her feet as well.
"I'll see you tomorrow Chloe," Rachel said. Chloe went in for a kiss, but Rachel shook her head and walked across the plank and off the boat.
"You're a fucking idiot Price," Chloe said to herself as Rachel walked down the hill and out towards the exit. "Big surprise."
"There's a sunrise and a sunset every day Caulfield. They aren't that special," Chloe said as she reached the top of the lighthouse trail. Max was seated at the lighthouse bench, her eyes glued to the horizon.
"Some are, because the day they rise and set on are special," Max said as she turned to look at Chloe, her face lit up with a smile as radiant as the sun behind her. It was almost enough to make Chloe not feel like a pile of worthless shit. Almost.
"What? You think today is one of those special days?" Chloe asked as she walked around and sat down on the bench beside Max.
"Of course, today I got to be with my best friend again," Max said, turning back towards the sea. Chloe glanced over at her, a thousand thoughts running through her mind.
"If you were a real friend, and not…whatever you are, I'd be pissed at you right now," Chloe said. Max looked over at her.
"Well…don't give me a free pass just because I'm imaginary," Max said.
"You sure you want to get into this, didn't you have something you wanted to talk about?"
"This is what I wanted to talk about. Us. I think...it might get busy after this."
"Okay," Chloe said, nodding her head rapidly like an engine revving for a big race. "Okay, fine." Chloe slammed her hands on her legs and then stood up. She pointed a finger at Max. "Fuck you Max," she said. Max stared back at her impassive, as if expecting it. It just pissed Chloe off even more.
"No, seriously, fuck you. You were there, for every shitty thing that ever happened to me, you were there, and you always knew exactly what to say." Chloe turned away from her and walked out towards the cliff. "I mean, of course you did, because you have access to my brain. But still, you helped me through everything. But then when Dad…" Chloe paused, the rest of the sentence sticking in her throat. She whirled around.
"I needed you Max! If there was a time I needed someone, that was it. I was lost, and all of a sudden I was completely alone. You can't...you can't make somebody need you and then...fucking walk out of their life like it's nothing."
"It wasn't nothing Chloe, I…" Max began.
"You don't understand!" Chloe screamed. She turned and kicked a rock, sending it flying out into the ocean below. She advanced on Max, getting right in her face.
"You don't understand what that did to me. If you could walk out on me, if my own imaginary friend thought I was worth so little, then how could a real person ever want…" Max reached out and took hold of Chloe's wrist, the small warmth of her hands radiating through her. It took her breath away. When was the last time Max had touched her? She didn't even realize how much she missed it.
Chloe's anger drained away, consumed by the hole inside her that never seemed to go away. She sat down on the grass, her legs suddenly not strong enough to support her anymore. She looked over at Max as her vision blurred. Max carefully got off the bench and sat down beside her. She didn't met Chloe's eyes, but her hand didn't leave her arm.
"Chloe, I was a shitty friend. That's on me. Me leaving, that says how worthless I am. You are amazing Chloe Price. I don't deserve…I don't deserve to be here talking to you. You're worth the world Chloe. And this week, I'm going to prove it to you okay? I don't want you Chloe, I need you too," she said. She raised her face to look at Chloe, her eyes filled with tears.
"If that, if you needed me, then why did you leave Max? How was I supposed to make friends after I had you? How could anyone understand me the way you did? You...ruined me Max. Why couldn't you stay?"
"I won't make excuses Chloe. I've made mistakes, so many mistakes. I don't get the luxury of choices anymore. I need you to understand that. But I never, ever, mean to hurt you."
"Max, what are…" Chloe stopped as something cold tickled her nose. Her eyes scrunched in confusion as she looked up at the sky. "What the hell?" She said as she watched the snowflakes lazily falling down. She stood up and held out both her hands, catching flakes in her palms. "Its like 80 degrees out here, how is it snowing?" She asked. Max stayed seated on the ground, her eyes watching Chloe's face with a sad smile on her lips.
"Max, are you seeing this?" Chloe asked, eyes turned upward towards the heavens. Max watched as the snowflakes peppered Chloe's face, melting into droplets that reflected the bright orange of the setting sun.
"Yeah, it's beautiful," Max said softly. Chloe paused and then looked down at Max, their eyes meeting. A small blush formed on Chloe's cheeks as they stared at one another, the snow falling between them.
Chloe's pants buzzed and she cussed quietly as dug her phone out of her pants, the moment, whatever it was, passing.
"Its Rachel," Chloe said as she looked at her phone.
"Better answer it, she's probably freaked out about the snow," Max said.
"Max?" Chloe asked, not even sure what her question was.
"Go ahead, tomorrow morning at the Two Whales before classes, I'll be there if you want to talk."
They stood there for awhile, Chloe, not knowing what to say, Max, patiently waiting, Rachel, buzzing in Chloe's hand.
"Okay," Chloe said. Max nodded, a small smile on her face. Then Chloe answered the phone and turned away.
"Rachel? Yeah. I know!" Chloe said as she started walking down the path. "It's snowing here too. It's completely batshit, it's hot as balls outside. Yeah."
Chloe paused as she reached the map of the town, their pirate fort crudely drawn in permanent marker catching her eye. She turned back towards the lighthouse, expecting Max to already be gone.
She wasn't. She was standing now, right next to the cliff edge with her back to Chloe, staring out at the bay before her. Against the sun she looked like nothing more than a pale, thin shadow, as if the breeze could dissolve her into mist.
"Huh? Yeah, where are you?" Chloe asked as she watched. "Okay, stay there, I'm on my way." She hung the phone up.
She watched a moment more.
Then she turned and walked back down the path.
