Hello everyone. Nekomaru Nidai's hanging towel here

and today I have a brand new theory for you guys, like always.

I'm afraid I'm gonna run out of intros, be boring like "Hey guys. New theory. Let's go."

but I shouldn't be complaining. Anyway today, I'm doing another request

and it's back on the topic of hair, cause everyone loves the hair in danganronpa.

You have gundam loreal hair, the komaeda marshmallow hair and of course the ahoges.

The ones who never die. (except yasuke that loser)

and today we are gonna talk about a special man with a really extraordinary special ahoge today

and that's the ahoge of the ya boi Hajim Hinatatas. (Doesn't really have tatas though.)

and someone asked me why does Hajime's hair has it's own graviational pull, in close proximity to

mikan's booty. Aka, why the fuck is he breaking the laws of psychics.

Well, my dear sir who requested this and people who have the same interests,

I am here to answer that question. Kinda.

So, ya see. When happens to be hajime's ahoge. We all know it's like a wild beast.

A beast even gundhamster couldn't tame.

Or Sonia ever beheld.

Noooooo, Hajime's has problem. And tsumiki proved it.

Hajime didn't know of this problem, until Tsumiki first pointed out to him on that one time

she tried to actually rape him at night in the hospital, because she the desease or whatever,

but fell asleep cause she's clumsy.

Anyway, ever since he woke up, he realized he had a deadly weapon.

A weapon that can poke anyone and kill anyone.

The pointy ahoge.

At first he thought over how he could get rid of it, behind the scenes.

He first thought he should have a haircut.

But then soon realized that there were no barbers (no barbersho, sonia)

then he thought killing himself,

because he then thought someone could use his ahoge to kill someone and pin it on Hajime! himself

but the soon realized that couldn't possibly happen, since he was a strong boy.

Anyway, come second time mikan tried to rape hajime but failed, because she had sleep deprivation

hajime realized that his ahoge wasn't pointy anymore. That was his saving grase.

Tsumiki saved hajime, guys. Tsumiki was able to release the spirit that was inside hajime's

ahoge from being pointy and now it's all limpy and wavy, like all hair should be.

All of others students hair is so right in every way. It's only hajime's hair that was weird.

He was afraid that people would suspect him for it too.

Which was a big no no, like Monomi would say.

Anyway, so tsumiki saved hajime and hajime thanked her,

but tsumiki had no idea what he was talking about. Because she killed someone

she gave zero fucks to the situation anymore.

She just wanted to fly in the wings of that big red arm to the aliens and become the next junko enoshima number 3 I think.

Anyway, hajime continued his life as a normal student (literally) and everyone was not happy.

…

but that's just a theory. An ahoge theory. Thanks for hajimeming.

So who knew that hajime had weird hair, huh?

Next theory, I might do something myself, but still leave suggjestion guys

I really love theorizing this things, as we know little on dr universe. And I know you guys

are just craving for that sweet and in some cases bitter information.

Anyway, leave it in the review and guys

for every review this theory gets, you will get your very own, no joke, no scam, a big, lush

ahoge garden.

Yes guys, the ahoge garden. It's what people want nowadays.

And it will come with an extra Naegi ahoges, the hajime ahoges, the komaru ahoges.

There's plety to go around.

Anyway guys, tune in next time, where I talk about how Ultimate Impostor impersonated me once.