Notes:

This chapter might be a little shorter because I'm preparing for a temporary move. I hope you enjoy and I'll update once I'm arrived and settled in my summer location. Hope you enjoy!

Eren sat overlooking campus. He was alone. He watched students zigzagging along garden paths, cutting across parking lots, and hurrying into revolving doors, no doubt envisioning the condemning stare of the professor they were about to offend with their tardiness. Eren saw them all, but nobody saw him. The reason was he was perched in his favourite place: atop the art complex, who's uppermost floor poured out onto an expansive concrete balcony that encircled the entire building. Eren had discovered the spot in his first year while wandering around on break. Those were the days, when he was still naive enough to spend his breaks adventuring rather than studying.

Ignorance was bliss.

Eren still wandered, and he still came to the top of the art building, but when he did it these days it was for entirely different reasons. He wasn't strolling due to an excess of free time; he was strolling in order to relax. His hours were limited but he knew he would waste them unless he found a way to unwind. He had completed almost all of his exams, but the pop-up essay still hung over his head like the rippling flag of a cruel autocrat.

At least he felt okay about Levi. Ever since the artist had barged over to Eren's parents' house in the middle of the night—a hint of a smile lit upon Eren's mouth at the thought—Eren's stomach had calmed down a little. He still had some trouble digesting anything other than plain rice and vegetables, but at least he was digesting something. Levi assured him that there was no rush. The only thing that mattered was Eren's peace of mind. Eren needed to focus on his studies. Eren could do whatever he needed in order to feel at ease.

Unlike Levi, Eren didn't have quite as difficult of a time trusting people. He got jealous like anybody else, but it was possible for him to wrap his mind around the idea that somebody actually cared for him. Plenty of people had, and did—his parents, his relatives, and his friends, to name a few.

Now that Levi had assured Eren that things were okay, Eren had set his worrying about that aside for the most part. It definitely helped that Levi had become a bit of a protective hen ever since learning of Eren's health problems. Even though Eren maintained that he was fine, Levi insisted on coming over every night after work to cook the boy dinner. Levi proclaimed that he would continue to do so until Eren's parents returned from the Bahamas. After the state he'd found Eren in, sleeping in the front room and practically starved to death, Levi stated that he would be incapable of sleeping soundly unless he knew that the boy's self-care was tended to. It was all excruciatingly lovely.

No, things with Levi were fine, and really, school was almost over, so Eren wasn't as worried about it anywhere near as much as before.

The thing that really stuck in his side was injustice. Eren had many friends and treated them as well as he could. Sometimes he even felt a little stretched thin, but in the end, it was worth it just to know that he hadn't let anybody down. He had a big heart and he gave as much of himself as he could. So, when somebody he had listened to and supported for years just turned on him for no fucking reason, hell yeah Eren got worried. More than that, Eren got mad.

It had been almost a year since he and Jean had fought at Eren's parents' estate. Ever since, Eren hadn't spoken to Jean except in passing at the odd show. Eren found it agonizingly difficult not to punch the fucker in the face every single time he saw him, but for the sake of those around him, he suppressed the urge with a clenched jaw.

On the surface, Eren was angry. If he really stopped to think about it, he was hurt. Seeing Jean reminded him of all the times they'd shared before Jean decided to become a raging dipshit about Eren's love life. No matter how many times Mikasa and Armin tried to explain it to him, Eren couldn't wrap his mind around it. Why? Why did Jean have to suck so much? How could the asshole be so single-minded? Was the fact that Eren's romantic tastes differed from Jean's truly enough to make Jean forget all the wild times they had together over the years, partying like buffoons, recuperating with boxes of pizza, and wasting entire days in Jean's basement playing video games?

Mikasa talked about values. Armin elaborated on upbringing. Their explanations made sense, much like the theories Eren learned about in his classes, but in his heart, he could view Jean's behaviour as nothing but scathing betrayal. It was stupid. It was painful. It was unfair.

Eren was the type to anger quickly, but he seldom held onto things longer than necessary. This was why, as the months passed, Eren began to forget about it. He spent most of his time with people who hardly ever brought attention to his and Levi's relationship, unless of course it was Erwin teasing them in one form or another for being so shamelessly adorable. Eren was consumed by other worries and Jean passed into the farthest reaches of the his mind. In fact, he probably hadn't thought about his old friend for an entire month before the nimrod had to go and pull a final trick.

Eren felt a cramp in his abdomen and winced, massaging it with nervous fingers. He knew he shouldn't be fixating on what had happened. It would only wear him down further than he could afford. He had an essay to write and a boyfriend to fuck. He wanted to be healthy for August so that he and Levi could go camping together.

But, GOD DAMN IT if Jean didn't make Eren furious sometimes!

The idiot graduated this summer. There wasn't a convocation until fall, but he had decided to throw a party at their favourite rock bar to celebrate anyway. He reserved the entire basement so, Eren surmised, he could accommodate the ludicrous number of guests he planned on inviting. Mikasa, Armin, Erwin, Hange, and even Eren's band mates were asked to come, but Eren never heard a peep. If that wasn't bad enough, Jean went behind Eren's back and asked Eren's band mates if they would like to play a set. Jean's only condition was that they would have to find a different vocalist to front the band that evening. Eren's band mates ended up turning Jean down, but as a final slap in the face, they also ended up agreeing to attend the party despite Jean's blatant slight to Eren's person. Eren had never felt so wronged.

He clutched the railing and stared daggers at a professor who was getting out of his jeep. I wonder if he's a homophobe? Eren thought to himself. What about her? Or those two? His anger was making him excessively defensive. His stomach threatened to cramp again and he shoved his lunch back in his bag. He'd eat it later once he'd calmed down.

The rest of his day was madness. He confined himself to the computer lab and spent four hours accruing resources for his paper. He worked until he could hear his stomach grumbling over the sound of the keyboard. Several people sagged with relief as he began to pack up. Wherever Eren went, it seemed he had to hold back. He was often too loud or obnoxious. People loved him for it, but they also complained. Eren got used to irritating people. His parents told him it was endearing, but Eren wasn't always sure.

Thankfully, there was one person in the world who never seemed to tire of Eren's noisy ways. Not that Eren was capable of much monkey business right then.

He knocked on the door feebly. He was particularly grateful for the invention of elevators today. He was so tired he didn't know if he could've made it up the five flights of stairs to Levi's apartment in his current state. It was unlike him to be so worn-out.

"Hey, brat."

Eren's troubles were momentarily washed away. Levi leaned against the wall like some sullen movie star. He was dressed in a loose pair of sweatpants and a button-down shirt, which he had left open. The shirt hung to the side, revealing the edge of one of Levi's nipples. Eren had a sudden impulse to bend over and nibble it. He almost did, but Levi was too fast. The older man leaned forwards and caught Eren in a kiss. Levi's tongue remained at bay, but he lingered there for a long moment, breathing softly into Eren's mouth; then, he pulled away and looked Eren into the eyes.

"How are you feeling?"

"G-good."

"Come inside."

Levi helped Eren in with his bag and got him a chair, which Eren collapsed into. Moments later a bowl of rice and broccoli appeared in front of him, along with a fork and a carefully folded napkin.

"Oh my god," Eren breathed, inhaling deeply. "Thank you."

"Have you eaten today?" Levi asked, eying Eren suspiciously. "You look a little pale."

"I ate some breakfast, but I couldn't get my lunch down. I'm pretty hungry."

Levi came and sat down in front of Eren, fixing him with an expression that would've been unreadable to anybody else. Thankfully Eren had spent enough time around the older man to pick up on the subtleties. Eren quickly interpreted Levi's displeasure, and acted accordingly, devouring an enormous chunk of broccoli in one bite.

"What's going on?" Levi asked, once Eren had swallowed five or so more fork-fulls. "I thought you were feeling better."

"I was..."

"So?"

"Agh," Eren groaned, releasing a hiss of air between his teeth. "It's that fucker, Jean. I still can't believe he had the nerve to ask my band to play without me."

Levi raised an eyebrow. "I thought we already talked about this. He's a dumbass. Anyone with sense can see. Erwin, Hange, Armin and Mikasa decided to boycott the party because of it. "

"I know, I know..." Eren sighed. "It just bugs me how my band members are still going to attend. I know it isn't their fault, but I wish they'd have told him to fuck off. It all feels like useless drama anyway. If only Jean could stop being such a useless fucktard—"

"He can't," Levi interjected, "and he won't. At least not for a very long time."

An ember of defiance sparked in Eren's chest, but he was too enervated to bring it to fire. He looked down and dutifully finished his meal, knowing Levi would accept nothing else. Once he was done, Levi cleared the dishes and led Eren to the bedroom. The bed looked outrageously inviting. The sight of it almost made Eren fall asleep on the spot. He let Levi strip him down to his boxers and tuck him in. The older man kissed him twice more, once on the lips, then on the forehead, and the two of them dozed off engulfed in the distant thrum of the city.

Eren awoke to a late Saturday morning. He looked over and saw that Levi was reading in bed. On the rare occasions that Eren was the first to wake up, he usually shuffled and squirmed until Levi was forced to acknowledge his presence. Levi, however, was far more courteous, especially ever since learning of Eren's health problems. Eren rubbed his eyes and yawned, arching his back like a cat lying with its stomach to the ceiling.

"How are you feeling?"

Eren assessed his body before answering Levi's question. It seemed the long sleep had really paid off. He felt numerous things he hadn't felt in a while: his stomach didn't ache at all, his mind was crystal clear, and he was, realizing with a jolt, cripplingly horny. The moment he realized it, like really realized it within his mind, he blushed a little. Levi's duvet was thick enough to mask Eren's erection, but the boy felt incredibly self-conscious all of a sudden.

"G-good," Eren replied softly. The stutter made him sound far more unsure than he had intended. He was unsure about certain things, but definitely not his current bodily needs.

Why do I even care if he notices? Eren wondered to himself. It isn't like we haven't banged a bazilion times before.

Maybe it had something to do with the fact that, given Eren's health issues, he and Levi hadn't gone much beyond a kiss for almost two weeks. Eren hadn't forgotten how to fuck, but he'd forgotten how to tell Levi he wanted to. It all felt so awkward now. What, was he just supposed to reach out and grab Levi's hand? Kiss him? Crawl on top of him and start grinding against his lap?

"You sure?"

"Yeah," Eren breathed, trying to ignore the way Levi's lips parted ever so slightly, revealing a sliver of his perfect teeth.

"Let me get you some breakfast, then—"

"Wait!" Eren cried, grabbing Levi's arm. Levi looked back at him in surprise. "I-I'm just... um..."

"Is something wrong?"

"N-no!" Eren felt himself getting redder by the minute, and harder. Just touching Levi's skin made him want more. If only he could just muffle Levi's questions with his mouth, strip Levi's clothes off to feel the artist's body pressing him all over—

"If you want breakfast, you're gonna have to let me go," Levi said, raising an eyebrow. His breath smelled faintly of toothpaste and tea.

Eren closed his eyes and breathed in hungrily.

"I just..." he said, losing his train of thought. "I'm not quite hungry yet, I..."

Slowly, tentatively, Eren pressed against Levi's thigh under the covers.

Levi's gaze intensified immensely. Eren couldn't be sure, but he thought he detected a hitch in the older man's breathing. Encouraged, Eren did it again, rubbing his erection up and down Levi's leg. Levi swallowed thickly.

"But your health..."

"I'm fine," Eren whispered, nipping Levi's earlobe.

"Are... you sure...?"

Eren didn't wait for a reply. He shimmied over until he was on top of Levi. Levi stared up at him with the same unreadable expression as always. His mouth was set, his jaw slack; really, the only place he allowed emotion to show through was in his silver-grey eyes. They gazed back into Eren's with what could only be described as pained pleasure. Levi was pained because he still believed he should hold back for Eren's sake. He was worried about Eren's health, but his body was betraying him. Eren, sensing his lover's reticence, began to move his hips to pleasure them both, and to his delight, he watched as Levi's gaze dropped slightly, settling itself on Eren's mouth.

Eren leaned forward, tempting Levi with the object of his interest. Levi never looked away, his eyes becoming slightly crossed as Eren drew near. Eren paused mere centimetres from Levi's mouth. Neither of them moved for almost ten seconds. Eren could feel Levi growing hard beneath him, pressing up against his boxers. Those needed to come off. After a moment Levi moaned under his breath, completing the reach in order to half-suck, half-bite Eren's lower lip. Eren gasped.

Clothes were torn off, underwear thrown on the ground, and sooner than later, Eren was on top of Levi in an entirely different respect. As the boy eased his way into his older counterpart, he had to stop himself from thrusting immediately.

"It's been a while since you've fucked me," Levi groaned, gripping a hand-full of his own hair. "I've... missed it."

His upper lip pulled upwards on one side, resulting in a sneer of sorts. Eren paused, giving Levi a moment to adjust. Levi always took Eren in without complaint, never grabbing the boy's arms as Eren did, never asking Eren to slow down or to go softer. Perhaps it was because he was older, but he seemed inclined to spoil Eren, especially in bed. Even so, the boy did his best to meet Levi's needs, regardless of how difficult it was to intuit what they were at times.

After a moment Levi grabbed Eren's ass and dragged him deeper, rewarding the boy's patience with an exceptionally lewd moan.

"Fuck, you feel good," he gasped into Eren's collar, pulling until Eren was fully inside. They were both panting already.

As Eren made love to Levi he hardly believed anybody could see it as a sin. The way Eren's body met with Levi's, over and over again, falling into a dangerously ecstatic rhythm; the manner in which Levi's eyelids fluttered as he struggled to hold Eren's gaze; the small whimper Eren heard himself release as Levi leaned up and sucked one of his nipples; there was nothing that could compare. It was unbelievably hot. It drove Eren crazy with how erotic it was. Beneath every moment coursed an undercurrent of immaculate beauty. What could be purer than an outpouring of desire as raw as theirs?

Eren increased his pace and felt a bead of sweat trickle down his back. His heart hammered in his chest, over and over and over again, and his breath came in deeper gasps. Looking down at Levi touching himself, the other hand still tangled in his jet-black hair, Eren felt fucking alive. He came loudly, shouting Levi's name and various other curses and indecipherable sounds. Afterwards he crawled down and sucked Levi's cock, working it with his hand until the older man exploded in his mouth, just as helplessly and vulnerably as the night they first met. Eren rolled onto his back and the two of them stared at the ceiling, their chests rising and falling in the wake of their passions.

"That was fucking amazing," Eren said at last.

Levi seemed lost for words.

"I..." Eren laughed, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. "I couldn't help thinking about Jean while we were fucking."

"Excuse me?"

"Not like that!" Eren cried, making a gagging sound. "Fuck! Just that he was an idiot for ever thinking what we do is wrong."

"It's true."

Levi reached out and took Eren's hand, lacing their fingers together. Eren thought for a while, enjoying the warm breeze trickling through the open window, spiralling through Levi's curtains and tickling their naked bodies.

"You know, I don't really care about Jean, though," Eren reflected. "It's been so long, it doesn't really matter. Sometimes I wonder if what I'm concerned about is something else. Jean's graduation sorta reminded me of how much of a mess I am. Soon Mikasa will graduate too, and all of them will get grown-up jobs, and I'll be stuck here with half a degree wondering where the hell everyone went..."

"I highly doubt Mikasa will ever disappear from your life."

"Yeah," Eren conceded. "But it isn't just about my friends. There's no way for me to get a proper job while I'm at school. It'll take forever to get my degree at the rate I'm going, but I don't have the energy to work at the same time." He sighed. "What if I never grow up?"

"Trust me," Levi intoned. "Growing up is extremely over-rated." He squeezed Eren's hand. "Besides, things always work out in one way or another. Degrees can be over-rated. I have one and look at what I'm doing for a living."

Eren frowned. "I don't know if I could handle it. The service industry sounds stressful."

"Thankfully you may never have to find out. With your wealth, it's unlikely you'll ever have to work as much as I do."

"That seems unfair," Eren protested. "Why should I have it easy while you don't?"

"Tch." Levi ruffled the boy's hair. "You're so worked up today. Don't worry about what you can't control."

"Who will I hang out with on campus once everyone is gone?"

"Erwin will never leave the university."

"I guess." Eren made a face. "But if I ask him to chill he'll probably invite me over to organize his bookcases or something."

"Probably."

Levi gazed out the window, running a hand over his stomach. "You know, though... you never have to worry about being left behind."

Eren looked over. Levi kept his eyes fixed on the pale blue sky.

"I'll always be here for you."

Levi's voice was the barest Eren had ever heard it. There was nothing to embellish his sentiment—no sarcasm, self-deprecation, or humour. Eren stared at Levi's unmoving expression. After a moment, he bent over nuzzled the older man's chest.

"Promise?"

Levi began to play with Eren's hair.

"I promise."

Eren was still young, but he believed he was learning. Most of the time he was loud and argumentative, mostly because he felt he had to defend himself to others. He was good at making people feel comfortable, but he often walked away feeling he'd played the fool. He was so hot-headed, people almost never took him seriously. Eren didn't really mind. All he wanted was to make his friends happy, even if it sometimes meant degrading parts of his personality.

But with Levi it was different.

Levi didn't ask Eren for the same things other people did. All Levi required was that Eren be himself. Maybe the next step was for Eren to learn how to accept himself too—anxiety, illness, temper and all. To love himself completely.

The same way that Levi did.

And the same way he loved Levi; more than anything in the world.

END CHAPTER 9