Disclaimer: I do not own Persona 3—or any version of the Persona series, really. I just own this rather shameless piece of work.

Other Notes: Fun Fact! During the initial planning stages, "Other" was supposed to name herself Shion, derived from one of my favorite flowers, asters, or Aster tataricus, to be exact. It suited the narrative in terms of meaning as well, as in the Japanese language of flowers, or hanakotoba, this flower symbolizes remembrance or, specifically, it means something along the lines of "I won't forget you." The name was supposed to symbolize her guilt over Minato's fate and keeping him in the dark for so long, as well as her vow to stay with him however she could—even in memory. However, I eventually decided that was a little too sad (and too messed up), so I fell back to a mythology name instead.

(Fun Fact 2: she had been extremely close to being named Kaguya for the sake of moon symbolism, but then I felt that was going too far.)

(Fun Fact 3: Despite ultimately being named Tamamo, it was honestly incidental that she has some similar physical traits to the Tamamo-no-mae of Fate/Extra (/Grand Order) fame. Total truth: I'm a sucker for blue-pink contrast, so Minato being blue-haired had me disappointed that FeMC didn't have pink hair when I first played Portable. And, as an early chapter was meant to hint, Tamamo's meant to basically take her appearance (FeMC, that is), albeit maybe not as pale-skinned since I am personally fond of my brown skin tone, haha. That said, this Tamamo also having long hair is just my preference for having long hair.)

Symbiosis

Chapter Forty-One

For all that they had all been bound together for ten years, their presences mingling and taking on traits of one another, it was relatively easy to find Death's door amidst the sea of trees in Minato's mind. It may have been due to the fact that Tamamo knew the feeling of Minato's mind well enough to be able to locate anything even slightly foreign, but she liked to think that she was acquainted enough with Pharos, too, to differentiate his presence from others.

"Oh…" she uttered when she and Pharos drew near the door. "The chains…"

For so long, Tamamo had known the seal on Death in Minato's mind to be an ominous black door, imposing in its sleek simplicity and the chains that wrapped securely around it. That door, like the Velvet Room door, was now merged with a large tree, black paint staining the bark where the opening cut out of the trunk and labeled with a plain white "XIII". The chains that normally kept the door shut tight, however, were less chains and more like wisps of smoke and light, ready to be snuffed out of existence with the next breeze.

"Soon, the end will come…" Pharos recited, reaching one pale hand to press against the trunk. The chains illuminated briefly, like a pulse, before dimming again. "I… do not know if I am ready for the End."

"I don't think anyone ever is, regardless of what their 'End' entails," said Tamamo, eyeing the door critically before her gaze slanted towards her companion. "So. If this opens, you won't go on that homicidal rampage again, will you?"

The boy Death looked up at her, eyebrows furrowed. Had he been the type to, she suspected he would have fidgeted; as it was, his expression was very nearly a pout. "I had less pieces of myself then…"

Lips quirking up in amusement, she nodded. "True enough. I assume that means you'll have more of a handle on it?" At his nod, she faced forward, shifting her weight to one leg and planting a hand on her hip. "All right then! Time waits for no one—or however you said it—so even though we've got a month ahead of us, since neither of us technically need to sleep we may as well start preparing now. You ready?"

"I believe so."

"Good. Now, hold up your hand."

Expression bemused, Pharos did so.

Making sure to telegraph her movements, Tamamo reached out to grasp his wrist with one hand while holding up her free hand. Lightly, she guided his palm to slap against her palm. When she let go, she smiled as he stared at his palm like he didn't recognize it before peering up at her.

"That was a high-five," she informed him helpfully. "People use it for things like greetings, congratulations, or, like now, encouragement and psyching up. So basically, a nonverbal way of saying 'Let's do this!'"

"I see." His tone said otherwise, but she let him be. "…Are you ready?"

"I'm terrified," she admitted almost casually. "But I trust you."

"…I see," Pharos repeated softly. This time, though, she thought he really did. "Thank you."

And before she could think of anything else to say to stall, he reached for the door.

It was two days after the operation when Ken approached Minato with a request to accompany him to the hospital.

Though Minato could easily guess why, he decided not to bring it up, simply agreeing and walking beside the younger boy in silence. He seemed to appreciate it, though his expression became less pensive and more nervous the closer they got to the pristine building.

Eventually, as they neared the front door, their pace slowed to a stop. Minato waited patiently for Ken to gather himself and decide whether he wanted to proceed or fall back.

"…Is it too soon?" the brunet asked.

Minato blinked at him. "Do you think it's too soon?"

"Well… no… but…" Ken frowned. "It's just… I felt like I should go, even though I don't really know what I want to say? Have you ever felt like that before?"

"Yeah. Definitely." Minato thought back, as he often seemed to do when interacting with Ken, to that awful summer week. Mentally, he snorted. He was never very articulate, and that time only further proved it. "If it helps, I doubt he'll mind… I imagine he'll know better than most how difficult it is."

Ken gave him a searching look, as if analyzing the veracity of his statement. But then, he faced forward again, nodding firmly. "…Okay. Let's go."

Following just a little behind the boy as he finally entered the hospital, Minato did his best to hide a smile. That was one of Ken's mission voices, he noted. Which, given their purpose there, wasn't too surprising to hear.

"It's because of little moments like this that I could never fully believe that humanity could so universally wish for the End," Tamamo chimed in from the back of his head, voice thoughtful. "They say that negativity has a louder voice, which is why we hear and remember the bad more than the good, but… the hopes and dreams of people can be such powerful things. Even if their only wish is to take just that one step further when it seems they can't go on or even know what they'll do once they're there… well, couldn't that be 'a miracle to counter the End' in itself?"

Outside of the Dark Hour, Shinjiro's hospital room lacked a guard (though Minato could see that Chidori's room further down the hall had two), though they'd had to check in at the nurse's station before they were allowed to enter. Once done, it had been fairly awkward to shuffle their way in, especially as Shinjiro had only watched quietly as Ken moved closer to his bed while Minato stayed off to the side, giving the younger boy the floor.

For a good few moments, everything was quiet save for the monotonous beeping and whirs of the hospital equipment.

Then, "How—How are you feeling, Shinjiro-san?"

Almost as soon as the question left, Ken winced and Minato hid his sympathetic cringe by looking away. He heard a snicker from his Other before she abruptly silenced it, emitting a sheepish feeling that told him it had been entirely involuntary. He did his best to send her the impression of him rolling his eyes at her without actually doing so.

"Oh hush, you."

I didn't say anything.

"Uh huh…"

Shinjiro snorted. "Bored as hell. Why're you here?"

With his customary bluntness and brusque behavior, the question sounded accusatory. Had he been in his usual getup, it would have been intimidating. As it was, dressed in a plain hospital gown and sitting on a hospital bed, hooked up to various machines, the upperclassman looked strangely smaller. Sallower, against the dull colors of the room, with the beginnings of deep, dark circles forming under his eyes.

"I wanted to visit," Ken said, as if deciding to match truth for truth. "I haven't made up my mind yet—about anything—but… I wanted to…"

Shinjiro looked at him calmly, expression betraying nothing. "Well, you're here."

"I'm here," Ken agreed. He frowned down at his shoes. "Actually, I… I want to ask you something."

Briefly, Shinjiro's gaze flicked to Minato. When he looked back to Ken, however, he merely nodded for him to continue.

"I wanted to know what you were thinking," the boy admitted, head still hanging low. "Why did you take those… those drugs? I—I asked Sanada-san and Mitsuru-san about them and… I just don't understand. If you knew what they would do to your body, then why would you take them?"

At this, Shinjiro let out a long breath, tilting his head back. "To be honest? I don't really know." He huffed before adding in a low murmur, "…Maybe I just wanted it to stop."

Ken's head lifted then, and his eyebrows furrowed until he had a fairly solid reprimanding look on his face. "That's stupid."

Surprisingly, Shinjiro laughed. It was barely more than a chuckle, but it was a laugh nonetheless, and it lingered in a half-smile as he tilted his head back down.

"Yeah, it probably was," he conceded.

The visit didn't last long, Ken and Shinjiro exchanging stilted small talk while mostly dancing in and around the main topic. Neither seemed fully ready to dive into that particular deep end, but at least the foundations of some sort of conciliatory bridge had been formed.

Just before they left, however, Minato sent Ken on first to wait for him ahead, stating that he had words of his own to exchange with the upperclassman. Though a bit confused and generally curious, Ken agreed and left the room. It was only when his footsteps faded down the hall that Minato turned to fully face Shinjiro and execute a rather formal bow, hands out of their customary spot in his pockets and resting firmly at his sides.

"I apologize," he said, still bowing, "for letting your condition get out like that when you specifically told me not to say anything."

Unlike with Ken, it barely took Shinjiro any time to respond. He clicked his tongue. "Don't. I know you're not all that sorry for it."

Unable to refute without lying, Minato straightened up from his bow, lips pressed into a grim line. It was true, after all. While he was sorry for breaking Shinjiro's trust, in the face of everything else that could have occurred… well. He would have done it again, if necessary.

"…" His Other let out a deep sigh.

What is it?

"It's nothing," she replied. "It's just… I always told my cousin I should never be around children for long."

…Huh?

"Bad influence."

Before Minato could even think to reply to that, Shinjiro let out his own sigh, though his sounded more exasperated than anything. "Look, I don't know why you went and told Ken, but I'm not stupid. I might not know you well, but I know you enough. And you don't do shit without a reason." Gray eyes cut into his. "You've helped Aki and Mitsuru and the others, so while I might not know exactly what the hell you're up to, I'll let it sit for now."

It was a bit scary, Minato couldn't help but realize, to find out how perceptive others could be. While he hadn't been arrogant enough to presume that his actions would be entirely dismissed, it was unnerving to learn how others could be watching and picking up things just as he tried to watch them.

Still, if it had to be anyone to call him out on things, he was actually pretty glad it was Shinjiro. Most of the others wouldn't likely confront him until they were entirely certain they were right, but once they did, they wouldn't let him go without getting answers. Shinjiro had a highly independent mindset, however, and so would let him be unless his actions threatened anything Shinjiro cared about. (Of course, given that Minato had so recently betrayed his trust, it would only be karma for Shinjiro to drag the truth out. But the upperclassman thankfully didn't care to get revenge.)

With all that in mind, Minato could only dip his head in acknowledgment.

Shinjiro nodded back, but as he sagged against his pillows, a smirk tugged at a corner of his lips. "And if you screw up? Well… I know I'm strong, even with my body all fucked up like this from the suppressants. With a little healing and rest like they're forcing on me? I'll just kick your ass. Plain and simple."

As Minato walked out of the hospital, greeting the sunny but cool fall day, he grimly stared up at the sky.

In other words, I'm going to die, he concluded.

"Way to think positive."

Tamamo, he thought despairingly, I'm keeping information on the end of the world away because we need the twelve Arcana Shadows defeated. How is that not screwing up in some way? He's gonna kick my ass!

"…You could probably take him?"

He can headbutt a Shadow and knock it down!

"Right. Well… Don't worry. Worse comes to worst, I'll avenge you."

…Great. Thanks.

His Other snickered, and he ignored it as Ken bounded up to him from where he'd been waiting on a bench off to the side. The younger boy looked a bit confused as he approached, staring up at his face. Minato managed a smile, and though it felt more like a grimace, it seemed to assure Ken and they started back down the path, slowly making their way back to the dorm as they chatted about more inane things.

It said something about his life that despite how school took up a good portion of his days, Minato still managed to completely gloss over anything involving… well, school.

Case in point, midterms.

"…Midterms?" he repeated, feeling quite dumb and probably looking it as he peered up at Yukari from a cup of tea.

Yukari's gaze lifted from a paper she'd been diligently scrawling on and, upon seeing the honest confusion on his face, blinked. "Uh, yeah? The ones we have next Tuesday?" When he didn't respond right away, her expression turned flat. "…Oh my god, don't tell me you forgot."

"I didn't forget," he said obediently, but that only brought her palm up to meet her forehead. He winced. It was a loud smack.

For a long while, she devolved to muttering to herself under her breath (something about being surrounded by idiots, which was nothing new, really, she muttered similar things in class all the time). Then, she all but shoved herself up from her seat, determination flaring up in her eyes.

"Okay. I'm going to go get Fuuka and drag Stupei down here, too," she said, a tone of finality ringing through her voice. She glared at him. "Don't move."

Feeling a mild sense of foreboding as she stomped off, Minato called, "What're we going to do?"

"What else?" she snapped back. "We're going to play that studying game!"

(And no one ate dinner that night.)

"Hey, Yuka-tan, has anyone ever told you that you get really competitive?"

"I prefer to think of it as motivated, thank you."

"Tell that to my bruise…"

"Y—You have a bruise, Minato-kun?"

"Oh, stop lying! He's fine, Fuuka. Honestly."

"I'm honestly terrified for finals now."

"You said it, man."

"Shut up!"

On the twelfth, the day off from school more or less convinced his teammates to take their own day off to relax a bit before midterms actually began… or, at least, that was how Junpei put it. With Minato staying neutral and Fuuka gently agreeing that too much studying and stress would work against them, Yukari was effectively outvoted for last-minute cramming.

Which turned out to be a good thing, as Tamamo requested his attention almost as soon as his day was freed. Though she'd told him he could go out and have the conversation later, it really wasn't often that Tamamo actively asked anything of him. And when she did, it was usually important. So, really, without anything important to do, he retreated to his room and promptly sank into his mindscape.

Upon arrival, he immediately took note of Pharos's presence at his Other's side and felt a more worrying flash of foreboding.

Tamamo, most likely feeling that spike of anxiety, made a complicated expression before visibly drawing herself up. Minato reflexively steeled himself in response as she blurted out, "He knows."

Despite having (barely) prepared himself, Minato still felt blindsided. He knows? He, as in—?

Without really meaning to, he looked to Pharos. Pharos, who was the boy Death, who was the incomplete Arcana Death Shadow sealed in his head and so sealed his fate as some sort of messed up martyr. Pharos, who nodded back at Minato as if to answer his unvoiced question.

"I know," Pharos confirmed guilelessly. "I remembered."

"But it's okay!" Tamamo rushed in, hands shooting up, placating. "He wants to help!"

"Help?" Minato parroted. "How? By not calling down the end of the world?"

She winced. "Well—"

Pharos shook his head. "It's uncertain I would be able to resist the call as the promised day approaches. However, we believe I can at least aid you and your friends until I can be absolutely sure of my control—or lack thereof."

"…And you think he'll actually stick around to do this once he's completely whole?" Minato asked his Other, voice low. It still made him uncomfortable to be in Pharos's presence with full knowledge of who and what he was, especially to talk about such important things when he could obviously hear them. But if he already knew, enough for Tamamo to already be making plans involving him, then there was little point to ask to talk in private.

Tamamo looked between him and Pharos, who blinked back up at her with a placid smile. She sighed. "Originally, Pharos left your mind after the final operation. He took the form of a human, though his memories of his time as a Shadow and as a part of you were temporarily sealed again. It was… He'd wanted to experience being human, I think. At least for a short amount of time. He'd learned it from you and so wanted to be a part of that world, a part of humanity, however briefly."

Mismatched eyes met his, so full of understanding even as they pleaded with him. "He wants to help us. Help humans. His role might've been to initiate the Fall, but right now? He really wants to be on our side."

And then, Pharos stepped forward.

"I understand now that I have caused you great pain and trouble and grief… I didn't before, but I learned and now I… regret… And I know that I will never truly be able to make up for everything you've suffered," he said, his words weighed down with a painful sort of wisdom that didn't match his youthful face. "But if you will permit me, I will do anything that is within my power to help you and her, and all the rest of your friends, through the obstacles to come."

Against the darkness of Minato's forest, Pharos's small shape fairly glowed, from the paleness of his skin to the unnaturally vivid color of his eyes. Even compared to Tamamo, whose presence had always stood out to Minato like beacon, it was a stark reminder of Pharos's otherness—something that never fit quite right despite having all the necessary features to blend in. And although Pharos did not bow his head in supplication, the fact that he had vocalized his desire at all rather than let Tamamo speak it for him was a humbling experience in itself.

Unbidden, Minato found himself remembering the sparse interactions he'd had with Pharos, before he'd known the truth of his identity. Back when Pharos had been just a somewhat creepy child that appeared with the Dark Hour and for whom Tamamo held an odd, if wary, fondness for. Back when he was a child that joined Tamamo and Minato around a conjured campfire and listened to Tamamo tell stories, soaking up information like a sponge and then rewarding the tales by firing out philosophical and existential questions. Back when he was a child that Minato taught how to properly swing on a playground swing set, and who giggled at Minato when he went flying off his Other's deathtrap of a merry-go-round.

He sighed and dragged a hand through his hair, wondering just when it was, exactly, that he'd lost his mind. "…Okay."

Tamamo beamed.

With Minato's permission granted, Tamamo proceeded to lay out the basics of the plans for the next operation. Or, at least, that was what she'd told him she would do. What he actually got were more like detailed blueprints that only just stopped short of annotating the finest details of every last marbled corner.

"Strega, huh…" It figured that they would strike eventually, though Minato would have thought they'd try before the very last operation. Then again, without Chidori, even with their further experience with the Dark Hour, gaining the advantage over a much larger group like SEES would be difficult. Especially since (with only a little bias on Minato's part) the members of SEES were all more than competent to hold their own in battle.

"They don't know the truth either, so by that point they'll be desperate to stop you in order to keep their power and the Dark Hour," Tamamo confirmed. "I'm pretty sure Ikutsuki is aware of them, though I'm not sure about any meetings between them. If they do meet, I'm not sure why Ikutsuki hasn't told them about the truth of the Fall since it seems like something Takaya would be on board with…" She shook her head. "Either way, while they never posed too much trouble on top of everything else, reality has proven to be more unpredictable and dangerous than fiction, so every advantage we can get would be best."

"And there's no better advantage than having Death itself on your side," Minato concluded wryly.

"Just so," she agreed.

After a momentary silence and a brief hesitation, she reached up, cradling his face between her hands and guiding him until his forehead rested against hers.

"I know you're worried," she murmured. "Anxious. And I know it must be a little scary to think about relying on Pharos, knowing what he is and what he can do. But hey." Her hands fell from his face to find his hands, squeezing briefly. "I've been his neighbor for about ten years or so now, and while he might've been sleeping most of that time, he's been pretty pleasant for the time he's been awake."

"I know," Minato muttered. "It's just, now that I know… it's difficult to forget."

Tamamo hummed and squeezed his hands once more. "Not asking you to forget. Not even asking you to trust him. But… trust me?"

It scared him. Because while he trusted Tamamo, trusted her with his life, she would be vulnerable.

If anything went wrong with this plan, with Pharos, she would be the first in the line of fire. The last time that something similar had happened only proved that. She had been torn apart.

Minato had already given the okay, but that didn't mean that he wasn't still terrified of the consequences that could occur. And he would never forgive himself if something worse happened.

(I don't want to lose you, some desperate, ever-grieving part of his mind whispered on and on and on. Please don't leave me.)

He couldn't bring himself to say any of this aloud and so settled for squeezing her hands back. It would have to be enough.

It had to be enough.