Elaine POV

God why does the Phoenix have to be inside such a well-protected human! I need more time with her without those damn dogs getting in the way. They killed my Jackson. My mate. They will all pay. But first, I need the Phoenix. I can't take them on without it, but that bitch has it wrapped around her finger just about. She's too good with it. Obviously visions of her precious wolf dying aren't going to cut it anymore. Time to step up the game; I will not lose to such an inferior species.

Kim POV

Life has been pretty easygoing since I had my love-affirming epiphany about Jared and me. The pack is like true family now, and they go out of their way to include me in their circle. I've seen enough bonfires to light up New York City, and it's made me feel really special. Things at home are still rough with my mom, but my Daddy recently quit his job and now works with the Forks Police Department doing liaison work. It's much closer to home and he never has to go on trips anymore so I see him every morning and every night and on weekends. We have begun bonding all over again. Talking about what's changed since the last time we were close ten years ago. I've forgiven him completely and I'm working on getting him to forgive himself. That part's still a work in progress. But he doesn't let mom treat me so terribly anymore and I actually got a real room! It on the first floor and it was originally the guest room but I've made it more my style. I have a real bathroom and a real bed and clothes that aren't hand-me-downs from the sixties. I don't think I could be happier if I tried. Well, no that's not true.

I have been searching for the woman I saw in my vision, the one from my past and I am having zero luck. It's literally like she never existed. I've also been looking for whatever "Blackwell" is because I hear d the name in my vision and on that matter I have had a little break: Blackwell is a well-known government corporation whose purpose is kept off public record. I'm still not sure if that was what I was looking for, but I'm keeping an eye on any news surrounding the corporation. The feeling I got about being kidnapped and assaulted when I was younger was really just a suspicion from the way the dream progressed and the way the woman in it spoke to me: like a victim. But I have since found out that it must have happened, because since I started dating Jared, my father has demanded that I get on birth control. To get on it though, I had to go to a gynecologist for the first time in my life. Let's just say it put awkward onto a whole new level. Especially when she told me that I marked the medical record papers incorrectly about not being sexually active.

-FLASHBACK-

"I'm sorry, what did you just say?"

"You didn't know?" The doctor, a kindly older woman with red hair and cold hands, looks baffled.

"Um, there has to be some mistake…I have never had sex. I-I mean there was an incident a few months ago but…he didn't-he didn't go beyond, um, groping."

"I'm sorry, Ms. Connweller, but during my examination I discovered that your hymen was torn some time ago, I'd say at least long enough to have healed so completely by now, and I'd estimate it to be at least over six months ago."

How can this be? I was a virgin, I AM a virgin! I think I would remember having sex!

"I'm telling you that this is impossible, I think I would remember," I protest, pulling my jacket closed tighter.

The doctor frowns and writes something on her clipboard.

"Have you ever been under the influence of drugs or alcohol, perhaps? That can cause memory loss in some cases."

"No, I don't drink, or smoke. Anything. I've always been the quiet girl who does all her homework and her chores and tries her best to blend into the wall when people pass her by. It's only recently that I have realized I don't have to live that way. And it's only recently that I got my first boyfriend, so you see, Doctor, I don't know how any of this can be true. It doesn't make sense."

She puts her clipboard on the counter behind her and then turns to me with a stoic face. But her eyes are kind.

"Ms. Connweller, do you play sports? Or ride horses? Is there any physical activity in your life that could help explain this?"

"No, to all the above."

"Well then, I think that the next best option here is for me to ask you something very personal. I don't meant to be invasive, but it is my duty as a medical official to ask you this."

"Um, sure."

"Do you think there is a possibility that you may have blocked the incident out? Perhaps, there was a…trauma related to the event that caused your brain to feel the need to protect itself and suppress the memories?"

"What are you talking about? Like…rape? Why would you say something like that?" I'm appalled.

"Because Ms. Connweller, you do not partake in sports or strenuous activity, you don't drink or do drugs, and you claim to have no memory of how your hymen was torn. Now, true there is a very slight possibility that you were born with an already malformed or weak hymen that anything could have fully torn, but it's very rare and I don't feel that that is the case here."

My mouth opens but nothing comes out, and I can feel beads of cold sweat beginning to form on the nape of my neck.

Blackwell, get away from her!

"Oh my God," I whisper.

"Ms. Connweller?"

"Huh? Oh, I'm sorry Doctor, I uh…I have to go."

"Ms. Connweller! I really must report this! I am obligated to report any suspicions of abuse to the authorities," She yells as I open the door.

"Oh that's really not necessary! I just, um, remembered when it happened. I just didn't want to say you know, because it's embarrassing and uh, yeah. Please just forward the bill to my address! I'm really sorry but I have to go now. Thank you!" I throw over my shoulder, but keeep walking through the clinic and dodging nurses to get to the exit.

I don't look back to see if she swallowed my lie. I can't believe this. I thought maybe I had the vision wrong, implied something that wasn't there. But, it was. Oh god, oh I can't breathe. I stop by my dad's car and sink to my knees with my back to the bumper.

Deep breaths, Kim. It's gonna be okay. It's in the past. You don't even remember, so it's okay. You're gonna be fine.

I don't know how long I kneeled sat there, but it felt like hours before I could force myself to drive home. And when I did it was like I was on autopilot. All I could think about was how to tell Jared, or how to ask my Dad if HE knew about it and didn't tell me.

-END FLASHBACK-

As it turns out, I never could do either of those things. I never told Jared and I never asked my father. But I know I have to. It's looming over my head like an anvil and sooner or later I know it's going to come down on me. Secrets have a way of coming out.

Speaking of secrets, ever since I met Embry, my brother, and remembered our past, I haven't been able to confront him on that either. I do remember that one day when I was five years old and he was seven, a man and a woman in court suits with briefcases came and spoke to my parents and after that I never saw him again. I can't figure out what went down without asking and like everything else I am a bit of a coward. What if he rejects me? What if he doesn't remember me?

Reasonable doubts sure, but if the way Embry hangs around when he's with me I kind of have a feeling that he knows, and maybe he's having the same doubts. So I have resolved to speak with him about it at this weekend's bonfire, when we have a moment alone. I can't believe it. I have a brother! How could I have forgotten him for so long? He's definitely changed from the skinny, hair-pulling little brat that I idolized so much as a little kid, I laugh under my breath.

"Something funny?"

"Gah! Damn it, Jared! How many times do I have to say: stop doing that?" I smack him lightly on the arm that he's wrapping around my waist.

"Sorry babe," he chuckles warmly, nuzzling his face into my neck.

The smile that spreads across my lips is automatic when hearing him say 'babe.'

"Seriously though, what were you laughing about all by yourself like a loon, hmm?"

"Oh hush. I was just remembering the look on your face when my dad gave you 'the talk' on our first official date and you looked like you were gonna faint," I shoot back.

"Hey, he was cleaning his shot gun! Cliché much? And besides I was still a little queasy from having your mom give me a pinch on the ass as I walked in the door."

"Yeah, clichés are clichés for a reason, Jay. And I told you not to wear those jeans, they make your butt hard not to pinch," I laugh.

"Yeah, whatever. I still don't think it's my fault your mom's a gross cougar."

"You have the audacity to walk around looking like you do, but not the hubris to believe when women twice your age want to pinch your butt? Well, just take it for what it is: a compliment!" I smile cheekily up at him.

He playfully spanks my butt, causing me to squeak and blush red.

"Well, then I guess you will have to get used to me wanting to pinch your butt too, looking like YOU do," he barks out a laugh at the look on my face.

"Who said I minded?" I turn my blush into a leer.

His eyes grow hooded very quickly, and the hand that smacked my ass is now palming it gently, but firmly. His other hand unwraps from my waist and slides up my side to land under my breast, thumb making swiping motions slowly, just brushing my bra. My breath is coming in heavy enough to hear, and I can see Jared's face flushing with heat at my reaction. We are pressed up tight from the bellybutton down, so I swivel my hips experimentally and am startled when Jared emits a low growl that I can feel vibrate against my belly.

"There's my purring puppy," I gasp out playfully.

"Puppy? Do I feel like a puppy to you, baby?"

The hand on my ass stops massaging and lifts me onto my tiptoes, leveling our groins and putting pressure on them. I can feel him hard against my woman's place. The heat of him practically burning through my shorts and panties. And Wow he is…big. I moan lowly and reach up both hands to wrap them around his neck as an anchor while he carefully undulates against me. I try to reciprocate the movements but the pulses of pleasure sparking from my core are leaving me stunned save for my nails scratching at his neck desperately.

"Oh, Jay, what-what are you doing?" I gasp out between hip thrusts.

He doesn't answer only lifts me up completely and sets me on the kitchen counter behind him. The height is perfect and when he pushes back up against me, I groan out happily.

"Yes, Jay, fuck!" My breath is coming faster and there's a strange pit building in my stomach.

The pulses at my core are getting stronger and more pleasurable, the harder he rubs up against me. He seems out of breath as well, and he's lightly sweating, placing kisses up and down my neck between gasps.

"Jared, maybe we should slow down, I-I've never," I don't finish that thought as his trail of kisses brings his lips over my t-shirt covered nipple and sucks strongly.

"Aah! Jay!" I clutch the back of his head to my breast and suddenly I wish there were less clothes between us.

When I try to take off my shirt though his hands stop me, and he ceases those glorious thrusts against my core. I moan in protest when he steps back very slightly.

"Sorry, I'm sorry I got carried away, Kim. I know you told me you weren't ready," he apologizes looking into my eyes sincerely.

"It's okay, Jay. I wanted it, you. But yeah, maybe we should stop now," I agree reluctantly.

As much as I'd like very much to continue, I can already feel my senses returning to me and with them a tiny hint of relief that I didn't go further. I'm really not ready after everything that has happened (Jackson, or JackAss as I call him), and the whole doctor thing. But it's still great to know I can turn him on like that. And he is definitely up for it. His pupils are blown wide, and his smile is loopy, not to mention the very large tent in his cut off shorts.

"Thanks, baby," I swoon a little.

He just smiles back and places a chaste, but sweet kiss on my lips.

"Oh, believe me. It was my pleasure."