Dunsparce and Qwilfish

At a secretive-business-like-location-but-most-likely-Japan, there was a building that served as the development lab for Game Freak. It is a unique place in this world, where ultra-hidden gateway portals allowed Pokemon to cross into reality in order to help programmers develop their games. Any who would dare to take a peek at a real live Pokemon would be in for a nasty shock, though. The development lab had defense systems that made military bases green with envy and background checks that would make the FBI blush. And with oaths that made the workers swear lifelong loyalty to the company or else be damned to designing and playing party games for the rest of eternity, the portals were kept under utmost secrecy.

It was a bustling time for the lab and the Pokemon who visited. Work on the fourth generation of games was in full swing. Some didn't need to worry; Pikachu could rest on his laurels, knowing full well that he would get some nice place within the games. Others weren't too sure about development on 'new mechanics'; it looked to shift how nearly everyone was used or not used. New Pokemon were always a worry, as it made unknown rivals and adversaries.

But the biggest announcement had to be that many older Pokemon were getting the chance to gain new evolutions and abilities. This caused some to worry and hope a great deal. Many of them were virtually ignored as they couldn't handle the top tier battlers. They didn't stand a chance against such Pokemon as Skarmory, Blissey, and Milotic. But new forms and new powers could even the odds, perhaps even giving a forgotten member a chance to shine.

One of those hopefuls was finding the biggest obstacle to be the stairs. He had an awkward shape: rounded body with poisonous quills and an oval tail fin that flopped uselessly as he forced himself up the stairs. In order to do so, he rocked himself a bit backwards, then pushed forwards and up with all his might. This was his fourth attempt at climbing the stairs. The previous three times, he would miss a jump and bounce all the way back down the stairs.

He cussed on his trips down and grumbled on his trips up. "Darn stupid rules saying that all Pokemon must use the stairs instead of the elevator. Sure, it's no problem if you've got feet, but what about us fish? Not to mention how chapped my gills are getting from being out of water. Man, I ought to go to school and study law. Then I'll sue for unnecessary hardships and unfair employment."

"Wouldn't that be eating the hand that feeds you?" a female voice said from behind him.

"What would you know..?" he started to snap, but then saw the speaker. "Oh, sorry Dunsparce. Didn't hear you come up."

"It's no problem, Qwilfish," she replied. She was designed as oddly as he was. She was too fat to be a snake, but had no legs. She had a head like a spearhead, but a tail with a conical drill so she could slither forwards or drill backwards. And she had two tiny white wings that were almost like a cherub's, except that nobody could mistake Dunsparce for a chubby baby.

"And I think that it's 'biting the hand that feeds you', not eating it. I know it'd be a pointless suit to make, but I just get frustrated. Still, it might be neat to become a lawyer. I'd get more attention by doing that then continuing on with these games. We've never played an important role."

Dunsparce had some problems with the stairs too, but she managed to slither up them easier then he was hopping. She slowed so they could keep talking. "We did in that Coliseum game."

Qwilfish snorted. "We were cast as Shadow Pokemon, remember? And we still didn't get much attention. All the players were like 'let's get these two purified in a hurry so we can use the better ones'. Bah. Kids ain't got no respect for the trouble we go through for their entertainment."

"At least they had to pay attention to us. I heard that in Gale of Darkness, some Pokemon just got stuck in the Purifying Machine, not even to be considered again. They had to experiment with us manually in order to figure out how to turn us back to normal."

"I still don't like it."

The door up ahead burst open as a dark blue Pokemon entered the stairway. Sneasel jumped onto the railing and slid down past his two peers. "Haha, I got it! Later, losers!" At the bottom, he bounded away towards the main portal.

Qwilfish snarled. "Jerk. Just because he's based on a weasel doesn't mean he has to be one."

Dunsparce raised her head, looking over the last few steps. "Want me to carry you up the rest of the way?"

"Can you manage without poisoning yourself again?"

"I'll be careful."

Beating her small wings into a blur, she lifted herself into the air. Delicately, she took hold of his tail fin and carried him up to the next floor. She put him down, then landed with as much grace as she could manage with her awkward body. Which is to say, not much grace at all, just plopping down onto the concrete surface.

Qwilfish hopped around to face her. "Thanks. And you're getting better with the hovering bit."

Pleased, she shook her drill tail. "I've been working on it; thanks for noticing."

One of the human employees opened the door. "Qwilfish and Dunsparce. Here for your review?"

"No, Mr. Rocket Scientist, we're here for the free donuts," Qwilfish retorted. "Duh, of course we're here for that."

He smiled slightly. "Okay, then wait outside the interview room. They're interviewing Sudowoodo right now." The worker went back to his work area.

They were now in a large room with many drafting table, cabinets, markerboards, and other tools of the design trade. An automated water fountain was over their heads and next to the closed door to the interview room. Dunsparce looked around. "Do they have donuts? I like the jelly filled ones."

Qwilfish shook himself. "Hah, Sudowoodo. What're they going to do with him? He's a fake tree, for goodness sakes."

"Well, they have to give everyone the chance to make a case for themselves."

He replied sarcastically, "Yeah, I know, and we ought to be grateful. What kind of evolution are you looking for?"

She perked her head up. "Me? Well I'm not sure how, but... I thought it would be neat if I could evolve into a kind of holy Godzilla."

"Holy Godzilla?"

"Well, I'm a reptile, for one, and I'm an angel, for another." She twitched her white wings. "Look at these wings and deny that I should be an angel."

He had to give her that one. "I wouldn't deny that you're an angel. A kind of unrealized case that needs something more to prove to disbelievers."

"So what're you thinking about suggesting?"

"I've been thinking about that a lot. The thing is, I'm already based on the most poisonous fish in the sea." He rolled his eyes. "And the deadliest delicacy, for that matter. But they did call me a balloon Pokemon. They ought to make a blimp out of me. A big spiky blimp."

"Spiky blimp, huh?"

"Hey, I think there needs to be more balloons like me. And what better way to do that then to make me an even bigger balloon?" He smacked his lips. "Man, I'm thirsty." He found a nearby chair and jumped onto that, then jumped onto the automatic fountain.

Dunsparce turned her body around so that she could look up at him. "Be careful up there."

"I'm fine. I've survived bigger falls." He hopped into the sensor's range, setting off the water spout. Letting it run over his gills, he sighed in contentment. "Ah, that's the ticket. Now if only it went a little faster." He opened his mouth and let the spout hit him.

The snake giggled. "You're silly."

Once he had enough water to satisfy his thirst, he jumped back onto the ground. His weight had increased enough so that he hit harder, but his quills were tough. "Hey, a fish has got to do what a fish has got to do."

She tilted her head, examining the way his quills were fully extended from his internal water pressure. "You sure it was a smart idea to drink until you were armed?"

He turned to the door to see if there was any indication of how long they had to wait. "Hey, it's no big deal. It'll soak into my dry parts before long and everything will be..."

The door slammed open, letting out a brown rock Pokemon that looked like a small tree and a tall human in a black suit. "All right then, we'll..."

Startled by the door, Qwilfish shot out all of his quills and the water he was storing. Sudowoodo yelped and bolted back into the interview room. Also panicking, Dunsparce stuck her tail to the floor and quickly drilled away from the Poison Pokemon. She crashed right underneath of a row of drafting tables and cabinets, wrecking them all and frightening the employees. Anyone struck by the flying quills was poisoned so badly that they had to be rushed to the hospital.

That included the man who was interviewing the Pokemon. "What was that for?" he snapped. "Why did you do that?"

Letting his cheekiness get the better of him, Qwilfish retorted, "We're doing exactly what you designed us to do, no more, no less."

And that is why neither Qwilfish nor Dunsparce received new evolutions in the fourth generation Pokemon games.

"But I want to be a holy Godzilla..."

…

Dunsparce Emerald entry: If spotted, it escapes by burrowing with its tail. It can hover just slightly using its wings.

Emerald entry: A Qwilfish uses the pressure of water it swallows to shoot toxic quills all at once from all over its body. It finds swimming to be somewhat challenging.

I want a holy Godzilla too. Palkia sort of fits the image, I guess, but not enough. Maybe that new white-colored legend...