Author's Note:

Did someone say they wanted to know how Cas functions? Anyone looking for a Cas POV chapter? Well too bad because I wrote it anyway.

Earlier that evening…

Castiel recognized the lab after a few moments of being there. He remembered it was when Dean led him out of his old home, that glass circle with a dirt floor and his burrow. Cas looked up at the same thing Dean was staring at, there were squares with moving things inside of them like that the thing Sam had shown him earlier. He felt anxious and moved along the floor, he could still smell something familiar there, something that upset him.

He needed some kind of reassurance and signalled it, a light sound escaping him that caught Dean's attention.

"It's okay, Cas," Dean had said and smiled. Cas had heard him say that many times, the same sounding words mixing. He understood them clearer now; like it was a real language but he couldn't speak it. Cas felt relaxed when he heard Dean say that because nothing bad ever seemed to happen around those words. It was always okay in the end, Cas found that he usually got out of the situation without harm. So his rule was if Dean says 'it's okay Cas' then he would trust it.

With that in mind he wandered more freely, the space was a safe one. He didn't like its smell but it wasn't too bad, it was a faint and faded scent that only bugged him a little. It reminded him of before the time Dean came, his old master.

Wait…

Was master the word he wanted to describe him with?

Castiel felt more confused lately than ever. He could sometimes understand Dean's language though most of the time it was all just a blur. At that moment Sam and Jet were talking to one another but Cas couldn't understand a word. It was mumbled and fuzzy in his ears, like his mind just shut down and stopped attempting to translate. He wondered if he was supposed to know those words. He wondered if he was supposed to be able to hear them.

Different things around were clearer than the time before Dean as well; he couldn't remember having thoughts like he had now. He didn't ever get confused before, he didn't have to be, he never questioned anything and he didn't know if he even could. He felt like his brain was waking up, like there was something else in him.

The word human came to his mind many times. He questioned that word and what it meant; did it apply to him? Did he qualify as a human? Had he ever been? Dean seemed to think he was. Dean and the others were the first ones he ever heard say it, or at least the only ones who somehow got him to remember it.

"Castiel Nov….." Sam's voice rang and faded in his ears and Cas looked up.

That was familiar. He was Castiel, wasn't he? What was that last part was it important or something else? They often said his name, but it sounded different that time. Whatever it was it had Dean excited, Dean moved so quickly to Sam's side. They talked some more but Cas couldn't understand them, it was all muffled nonsense and his brain just wouldn't connect the dots. He was used to that but it was starting to frustrate him. He sighed to himself and moved on to look at different things, he didn't know what any of them were but at least it'd keep him busy.

As the others chatted he moved around the same level and peered at the equipment. Part of him felt like it was scary but Dean said it was okay. He stared hard at a stick that was jutting out of something else, he didn't want to be afraid of it if Dean said it was okay. Dean said 'it's okay, Cas' so it must've been alright. Cas felt a little bad for doubting, he wanted to prove to himself that Dean was right and he had no reason to worry about it. He reached for it and heard Dean's voice almost immediately;

"Cas, …..okay?"

Dean took his hand and Castiel followed his lead.

"Stay here with me."

He understood those words and it made him feel incredibly happy to hear them. Dean wanted him around; Dean didn't think he was a burden or too much trouble. Castiel felt a leap in his chest and he followed it right onto Dean, wrapping himself around and promising he'd never let go. He didn't care that they hit the floor, he didn't care that it hurt his hands a little. He knew something was wrong with him, he knew something wasn't right and he felt that maybe it was too big of a thing. Maybe he was too much to handle, too hard to stay with for long.

But Dean said it anyway. "Stay here with me." Castiel promised he would. He would stay forever if he was able to, as long as Dean wanted him there.

Dean sat up and touched his head, saying something else but Cas couldn't understand it. The tone of his voice was friendly though, so Cas didn't worry and kept pushing his face against Dean's. It was a little scratchy but he liked that. He liked everything about Dean's face.

Castiel stayed at Dean's side as the three continued to talk, every once in a while he heard his name and understood a random word but nothing was stringing together. He tried to focus on their conversation but his brain just wouldn't cooperate. It was still too overloaded and heavy, that weird clouded feeling always there to stop him from pushing forward.

The word animal came to mind many times. He remembered being called a beast a few times, that he was more animal than human. He remembered those words and he remembered the man that said it. He hated that man. Master he used to call him. But the old master was gone; Castiel hadn't seen him in a long time – he made sure of that.

He wondered what it meant to be more animal than human, to have the mind of a beast instead of a man. He understood better after he'd met Dean. His old master was a monster, had the mind of a monster and never seemed to be like Dean, Sam, or Jet. Those three were what Castiel understood as human. His own mind was more like an animal, he couldn't think like they did, he couldn't use language like them, and sometimes his brain would disconnect from human thinking entirely.

He wondered about his old master and what happened. He was pretty sure that Dean and the others talked about it. MacLeod was a commonly mentioned name; it was probably his old master's. Cas was certain he'd never be able to say it, he could barely say Dean, and even that didn't come out right.

Castiel decided that he wouldn't call MacLeod anything but that; master wasn't a word he needed to use anymore. Maybe for Dean…

"Cas, ….." Dean sounded so happy and Cas looked at him curiously, what had he said? Cas wished he knew. He also wondered what that little box was, they all seemed to have one.

Dean looked worried as he leaned in closer with the box, it made Cas worry too but he tried to stay calm. Maybe it was nothing, maybe he was supposed to do something that Dean said but didn't understand.

As he questioned the situation he saw a familiar face. It was him. It wasn't him, it was one of them. It was one of them.

It wasn't his reflection.

His heart rate sped up instantly and he reacted. It wasn't going to hurt him. It was a copy, it wasn't real. He was the real one. He wouldn't let it kill him.

It wasn't going to kill him.

It broke.

Shattered in his mouth leaving trails of pain where it had been.

Cas relaxed, it was gone. It wasn't going to kill him, it wasn't going to hurt Dean or Sam or Jet. It was dead. He shattered it.

The last two were weaker than all the others he remembered. He was happy MacLeod was dead, there were no more fights with copies.

Dean and the others kept talking and Cas didn't understand them but Dean moved closer to him to pick at his mouth. Cas held still and waited, happy that Dean would care enough to get anything out. It felt better when Dean was done. He pushed his cheek against Dean's hand as it ended and received another hair ruffle and something that sounded kind from Dean.

Then he heard MacLeod's voice. It was muffled and confusing but it was definitely him. Cas shrunk down and inched closer to Dean's side, completely pressed against Dean's leg. MacLeod was dead, he knew that, he made sure of it and felt it several days before. He didn't know where the voice was coming from; he couldn't see what they were all looking at.

His name was mentioned a few times and then MacLeod stopped talking. Cas remained very still and listened, he couldn't smell anyone new and the sound was a little different than normal. It was like if MacLeod spoke through to him in the white room, it came from somewhere above but he could always smell the man through his reflection. Cas sometimes wondered if that was his own smell, but he knew better when he was alone.

MacLeod talked again, this time it led to a familiar screeching sound. Cas bristled and looked around the room, no doors had opened and he couldn't smell anything. It was weird but he stayed close to Dean, not freaking out just yet.

It reminded him of when Sam showed him the tiny Dean in his box, Sam seemed really happy and Cas remembered feeling better when he saw it. The sound was kind of similar, something electronic to it. That didn't stop it from making him feel worried. The audio cut abruptly and Dean looked down at him and Cas looked up, unsure of what either was feeling he just blinked.

The sound came back again moments later right from where it had stopped. It wasn't real. Cas let out a small puff of air and tried to relax again. Nothing was happening, it wasn't real.

But it was still familiar. He recognized it somehow, like he'd been there before.

Dean and the others talked for a little bit again and soon Cas heard MacLeod talking more, just like the other one. He knew that it wasn't really happening but he didn't understand why he was hearing it. They were hearing it too; they were watching something that Cas couldn't see. He didn't want to see, though. Hearing it was enough already.

"..wonder if Cas… control…we see?" Dean said and Cas heard some of it, he sort of understood it but he didn't have context, he had no idea what Dean meant.

That was more trouble, Cas could hear sometimes but it didn't always make sense. When part of his brain would connect it wouldn't give him enough information. He wished he could speak like they did. They sometimes understood him when he tried but it didn't always work, most of the time he just felt like he was flailing around at a wall.

Cas waited until they finished, each sound picking at his brain more than the last. MacLeod was talking, he could hear the sounds of copies, it all made him feel very unwell. It all ended very fast but it left him wondering. Wondering if he should've watched, if maybe he'd understand better. Wondering if it was actually real somewhere, if maybe Dean and the others were just there for a short time. Castiel knew he wouldn't know if he never saw it, maybe time would tell but seeing what they saw could give him some answers.

The three were leaving but Cas leaned up toward the box, it smelled like MacLeod a little like everything down there. He wanted to see but didn't know how. He tried to call for Dean. "Deeeeeeee…"

It only got him a single sentence, "Come on, Cas." He was happy to understand it but he didn't want to hear it.

Maybe Dean was right, though. Dean usually knew best and if Dean thought he shouldn't see then maybe he wouldn't. Cas trotted up to Dean's side and did his best to show his appreciation for Dean looking out for him. He purred softly and brushed a wing over Dean, it created a smile and Cas felt like he'd done well.

He reached over for Dean's hand but wasn't sure if he should take it. Dean seemed uneasy about him before, hearing the copies and Cas didn't know what MacLeod had said. What if maybe Dean didn't want him to be so close?

But then Dean took his hand and Cas remembered his words "Stay here with me."

Castiel sighed lightly and held on tight, he trusted everything Dean said was truthful. He trusted Dean. He trusted he shouldn't watch what Dean had watched. He trusted that he was safe. But what if, just this time, Dean didn't understand? What if Dean didn't know that those copies weren't real? What if Dean thought the copies were as safe as Castiel was?

"Dee?" he wanted to ask, he wanted to tell Dean that the copies weren't safe. He wanted to make sure Dean knew. But he didn't know how to do that.

Dean was talking and Cas couldn't understand him until the final part "…I won't let anyone hurt you again, okay?"

Castiel stared and felt his chest get heavier and the space behind his eyes filled with pressure. He was barely able to comprehend what that could mean in its entirety before Dean was holding him. Castiel didn't have to do anything; Dean's protection was already there, his words, though difficult to hear, were strong for him. Cas let himself feel that safety for once, he'd never believed he was safe or free before Dean came. He never knew if he could trust the secluded safety of his old home, it was controlled by MacLeod so anything could happen in there.

But Dean was different. Dean made him smile, made him feel joy and excitement, and now Dean let him feel safe. Castiel cried for the first time since he promised himself he never would again.

"You recognized all those sounds from the videos, didn't you?" Dean whispered softly to him and Castiel nodded. He understood that sentence, he understood Dean's sorrow and he knew that it was for him. "I'm so sorry….." Dean's words melted away but Cas heard everything he needed to. He dug his fingers into Dean's shirt and clung there. He never wanted to move. He never wanted to step away from that safety net, but he knew he couldn't stay there forever.

But that was alright, because Dean would still be with him, and he would stay there with Dean.

He stepped back and Dean looked at him earnestly, "You okay?" it was concern for him and Castiel nodded, he really was. He held Dean's hand again and walked up the stairs the rest of the way.

Cas loved the hall after the basement, he loved the floor and how different the world above was from his old home. He felt overjoyed, like the world was lifted off of him and he was given something much more beautiful. Cas tried to tell Dean but Dean said something about bed. Cas knew what that word meant so he declined. He didn't want to sleep yet. He loved sleeping with Dean but he didn't want the day to end yet.

Then he heard something outside, it sounded like other mechanical things out there and he knew that sound meant someone new was there. Cas ran down the hall, he knew that they would try to move him if they'd heard what he did. He knew they would hide him, so he didn't tell them someone was there. Instead he opened the door to the new face of an older man who looked surprised to see him.

Cas didn't recognize the guy but there was something about his scent that just seemed friendly. He didn't get much chance to inspect the new guy before Dean rushed up and jumped on him. Cas wasn't sure how it made him feel, it was a different hug than what Dean gave Cas. What was this new person to Dean?

They were all very friendly with this man and almost seemed to forget that Cas was there at all. He followed them to the sitting room and inched closer to this 'Bobby' person. He leaned in and sniffed, he was pretty sure that it reminded him of Dean a little. There was something similar but he couldn't place it.

Bobby sounded a little irritated at him but more confused than anything. Cas moved away from that spot and went to Bobby's other side to see if maybe he could suss out what was so special about this old man. As the group talked Cas picked up on a few things, mostly that it was about him and MacLeod.

Cas decided Bobby was not a threat and he moved over to Dean's side, nestling in close and happily remaining at Dean's side throughout the night. It was interesting to catch different parts of the conversation, though mostly he listened to the tone of their voices. Dean was so happy that Bobby was there and knowing that made Cas feel much better about it. Dean trusted this Bobby, Dean felt very close to him. So did Sam, Jet was harder to read but Cas was sure he was happy too.

Dean, Sam, and Bobby all drank the same liquid, Jet had a glass but he didn't drink from it the way the others did. Cas wanted some but Dean wouldn't let him have it. He wondered more about what it was, he got to sniff it at one point and he was even less sure. It made Dean's breath smell funny too.

The night ended with everyone yawning and Cas happily followed Dean to their room. The only question he had on his mind was whether or not he'd dream that night.

The first time he'd ever done it he remembered he entered MacLeod's sleep. It was vivid and he felt so much control. His anger lashed out and he let his beast run wild. Cas learned about himself in there, learned the strength he could wield. It was scary the first time; he would stare at MacLeod and wonder if the man was real or not. Each dream he'd go closer. He could feel MacLeod's fear the longer it went on and he knew that something in those dreams was different. Castiel felt like he could fight MacLeod, like he could win something. Some like his freedom.

With Dean and the others he wanted to know them. He wanted to know what they were like, he had no ill intent, he wanted to know if he was truly safer around them than in his old home. He couldn't see what they had seen; he could only feel their presence. It was a much different dream than what he'd given MacLeod. He didn't want to hurt them so he touched their minds as little as he could when they slept.

Dean was his favourite when everyone was awake, but Cas was pretty sure that Sam was his favourite when they were asleep. Sam was so pure and it made Cas feel something new about himself. Like he was worth something, truly and honestly worth something more than he could ever imagine. It made him feel beautiful.

Dean gave him love. Cas could feel it unconditionally when Dean was asleep, but he could also kinda see it when Dean was awake too. It was tough to pick who his favourite was.

Jet's mind was weird to him, Cas' overall feeling from it was that Jet was protective of him but it came out more in a revenge sort of way. But there was something far more fearful in Jet than the other two, like he'd felt the same fear that Cas once felt, that powerlessness. Cas felt bad for putting Jet in the dream sometimes, Jet didn't wake up as easily as the other two did.

He knew that they were seeing his past. He wasn't sure how he knew, maybe it was when they woke up it became more clear, maybe he'd heard them say it. He didn't know, but he knew what it was and he wanted them to see it more. He hoped they'd be able to tell him what happened to him someday. He didn't know what happened, it was so distant and felt unreachable. A big mess of memories that weren't his but were at the same time.

Castiel decided he'd try to go easier on them, that maybe that night was good to let them be a little. Of course, Cas didn't always have control over it. He hoped that he wouldn't have nightmares too, that he'd be able to go easy on himself as well as them.

Regardless of how it would go, he was ready for sleep. Cas cuddled up close to Dean and happily dozed off, not caring what might happen because Dean was with him. They were safe.