AN: Hi, guys! Okay I swear I haven't died or anything haha. Life has just been really busy for me, and I haven't gotten the time to update. Hopefully it won't be so long the next time, but no promises. I hope you're all still enjoying this story, I'd love to hear what you're thinking of it! Have a great day :) Oh and I really love this part - the beginning's my favorite!
I chuckle softly when I accidentally let the door of the cupboard bang loudly and I hear him turn around in his socks.
"Don't you know the meaning of a top secret mission? The keys to it are silence, invisibility and swiftness. If you were in the military doing some secret operation you'd probably be taken out by the enemy forces by now." Paul remarks after turning to face me and I muffle my laugh with my hand and I see him shake his head as he reaches up to a cupboard door.
"I never want to be in the army, so it's okay."
"Well women can't exactly be in the armed forces anyways." he remarks as he pulls down a tin can and I lift myself up onto the clean counter as he brings forth two tall glasses and finds a spoon in the drawer where a tray of silverware is, banged up and in different styles.
"Yeah for now, but we are in the future."
"Ah really? You know, I think that's great and that women should get more opportunities since they aren't treated all that nicely now." he speaks as he takes off the plastic top with his fingernails and spoons two scoops of the brown powder into the glasses as the light above the oven is the only light showing in the quiet kitchen this late night at eleven o'clock.
"You really mean that? I've never heard a man say something like that, and I didn't think I ever would. Most guys just come off that they think either way, but they never say it."
He looks up as he closes the door to the refrigerator with the milk jug in his hand that has three fourths of the way left of milk and he looks at me with a funny expression, "Why are you so surprised, though?"
"Because don't men see themselves as being better than women at this time and that women are less capable?" I ask with a furrowed expression and he pads over to take the red lid off and pour milk up to nearly the top of the two glasses designated for us.
"I don't think that, really. Yeah we're different, but I don't think they're worthless or not worthy, you know? Women do a lot and I've kind of realized that since my mum passed with how things in the household changed. They carry the babies, give 'em life and get left to take care of them at home. I've certainly never done it, but I'm sure it's not an easy task by any means."
"Neither have I, but it isn't," I pause to watch him stir the powdered mix into the milk to turn it the color chocolate milk, but this isn't just any old chocolate milk. "What? Do I have something on me face?" he questions self consciously after looking up to see my eyes already on him and he blushes.
"No, no, you don't. I just-. I don't know, you're just not like other guys."
"I dunno whether to see that as a good thing or a bad thing, to tell you the truth." he notes as he sips from his glass and then hands it to me.
"Your Ovaltine, milady."
"But you drank from it!" I exclaim as I take the cool to my touch glass from him and he snickers as he twists the top back onto the can.
"But I had to try it to see if it's good and boy is it. Actually you should be thanking me, really."
"Your spit better not be all over the rim. That's always gross." I comment with a look saying 'yuck'.
"Well you've kissed me a dozen times already, so what would be the difference?" he asks cheekily and I scoff at him with my mouth hanging open and he turns to drop the spoon in the empty sink that we did the dishes in earlier while a laugh comes from his joking lips.
I roll my eyes and take a long drink from it as he does the same with his own and then puts the mix back and slides up onto the counter to sit beside me. I set my glass aside and yawn as I cross my ankles and look down at the floor I volunteered to sweep earlier and I did just that since I feel as if I don't do much around here, other than sit around with Paul.
"How's that ankle of yours? It isn't bothering you anymore, is it?"
"No, not really, but only if I step on it wrong. Thanks for asking, though, and don't worry. I'm fine." I assure him and he nods and picks up his glass to take a gulp from as I look around the clean kitchen we spent some time cleaning before we headed up to bed an hour ago after the show ended and we all had dinner here; one that Paul and I made together.
I remember the gross dishes we had to do and how it took us much longer than it honestly should of because Paul got sidetracked so often due to his boredom and then we had to change out of our clothes that were damp with dirty dish water into clean ones and since I didn't have any clean ones I'm now sitting in much too large for me clothes of Paul's.
"I reckon you don't like goodbyes either, huh?" Paul asks out of nowhere and in a way continues this small talk consisting of a few sentences that we had before we ventured downstairs not even five minutes ago.
"No, I hate them, to be honest. What will happen if-."
"Lets not worry about it, yeah? We can sort all of that out if and when we come to that." he steps in to comment in a tone that sounds balanced, but when you think about it a second more you hear something like fear in his voice, the same thing I'm feeling.
I look away as I can feel it in my bones, this suspicion that I have that feels so much like a knowing and nothing like a suspicion. That goodbye seems unavoidable to me; one that we'll both have to say even if it's the last thing we want our lips to utter.
"I don't want to say it or have to do it, but what if there's not a choice?" I turn to him and mumble and he wraps his arm around me to pull me in tight and I let my head fall to him and my ears can't deny the heavy sigh his lips undoubtedly release.
"There's always a choice, Court. There's a choice to be happy, and one to be mad. You don't have to go to college and then you don't have to like this thing or that person. You're never left with no choice, never." he mutters almost under his breath that I don't hear him and I squeeze my eyes tight as one tear leaves them to fall onto his worn shirt.
But there isn't a choice in this situation, there just isn't. I'm sure you're thinking that I'm wrong about that, but what about him? Again I don't end up in his future, or at least the one I know before I changed things, and I don't want to stray him from that and those people. I feel like if it came down to it I'd be torn between leaving for his sake, or staying for my happiness. I decide not to think about it all too much since for all I know I might never have to make that decision, or hopefully I won't have to.
"It feels like I don't." I confess into his shirt and I look up to his dimly lit eyes that set themselves on me.
"But you do, and you know what? You don't need to worry about it 'cause if even something comes up you can still stay."
But I feel like I couldn't, the opposite of what he's saying.
"Don't think about it too much, Court. It's nothing." he comments and then pecks my cheek with a small, encouraging smile and he offers me a hand when his feet hit the kitchen floor and we grab our glasses of chocolatey goodness to head upstairs for probably the night as our eyes droop and the yawns are catching up to our nearing exhausted bodies, especially Mr. Musician's over here.
"The sun is already high in the sky and I'm in my work clothes, and on my break. Now I let you sleep in while I went to work for my morning part but now it's time for you to haul your lazy bum out of bed and to spend time with me before I have to go back and bloody record again." Paul's booming voice announces and I open my eyes to slits before I close them when he opens the blinds to reveal the sun that is much too bright for my liking.
"No thanks. I'm going to back to sleep, thank you very much." I grumble into his pillow that smells of his cologne that I love to wake up to and fall asleep to and I turn over to face the wall.
"Oh no you don't. It's one in the dang afternoon and you are getting up, now!" he objects and strips back the warm comforter that is nuzzled around my body and I whine and try to bring them back as he collapses into the bed next to me after fighting over the covers with me.
"Hi, bed head. How was your thirteen hours of sleep?" he questions and I peek open one eye to see him laying on his side with his head supported by his hand while he moves hair out of my eyes as I don't care anymore if he sees me like this. I've seen him with a head full of crazy hair and with rank morning breath too.
"Go away."
"That's not that nice of a thing to say a person who comes over on his break just to see you, and also to make sure that you're still alive." he remarks as my eyes find solace in the dark pillow as his fingers toy with my hair that was curly yesterday from having had it in a braid the day before.
I smile into the pillow and lift my sleepy head to see him peering around the room and he looks to me and a smile appears on those lips of his, "Look who's making an appearance finally!"
I laugh at his comical words and he drags me over to lay closer to him and I moan and move away, "No, I need to go take a shower."
"Then go take one, and try to make it quick so I can see you once more before I leave, yeah?" he speaks as I rise from the bed that I didn't want to leave at all and I nod my head as I touch my tousled hair.
"Yeah, yeah." I grumble as I trudge to the door and down the stairs and into the empty bathroom where I step into the stall after stripping off my wrinkled clothes.
"You know what I think?" Paul comments as I step back into the bedroom with a clean outfit on, my wet hair getting the back of my shirt wet and my eyes still threatening to shut.
"No, because I'm not a mind reader so please tell me." I respond as I comb my hair back and I put it into a messy bun on the top of my head while he lays on the bed just the same with this casualness and effortless handsomeness to him. I wish he didn't try so little to be so cute, because it makes me feel like I have to try so much more to feel pretty sometimes.
"Well I already knew that, but anyways I think you need another nickname just 'cause."
"Do not pen me the monster from the deep, don't you dare." I note while putting lotion on while I face him in a simple outfit I put on in the steamy bathroom and he moves to lay on his back with his hands behind his mop top of a head.
"That one didn't come to me, but I'll leave that one alone though, love. Hmm..." he trails off as he stares up at the ceiling to think and I plop down beside him and his head falls to face me as I rub my eyes only to let my hands drop to see him staring at me.
"Staring isn't polite, don't you know that?"
"Not when I'm looking at a pretty bird." he claims and I shake my head with the smile tugging at my lips and I finally let it loose as he repeats what happened before I let, and I nuzzle my head against his chest while I get the strong smell of cigarettes coming to me which isn't the best memory.
AN: I totally forgot to ask! Who's bought Paul's new album?! Who likes it?! I love it the more and more I listen to it. He's still got it :)