Author's Note:
Since I'm a butt and missed yesterday's usual update I shall post this one too :D
Castiel was tired, his arms were sore and his side was aching. He could feel the blood had dried and it had become itchy, he did his best not to scratch it. The others didn't speak up much, they all just did their part over and over again. He didn't really complain about that, talking would lead to Dean telling him to take a break again. And while part of him thought that'd be good, he could see an end and wanted it to come faster.
Once all of those clones were dead they'd be safe. Dean would be safe, they could all sleep soundly and Cas wouldn't have to sit up at night worrying about it. He could finally move forward, he could move on with it all and he wouldn't have to worry anymore about where he came from.
The basement could be abandoned once they were finished with it, he could burn it if he wanted to. He could level the walls, destroy everything down there and never think of it again. He had become more himself than he ever thought he could be; sure, he didn't know exactly what he was supposed to be but that didn't matter. Everyone would accept him no matter what he had become, even if that wasn't who Castiel Novak originally was.
Cas was looking forward to that. He felt like he was slowing down, like his energy was running thin. His side didn't hurt as much, a dull sort of ache that pulsed every time he exerted himself. It was alright, at least he wasn't losing blood anymore.
He hadn't expected Dean to suddenly say anything, but it was a warm-hearted apology and all Cas could do was smile about it. He hated fighting with Dean, but sometimes it led to moments like that one; a quiet look that expressed everything. Cas was forgiving and Dean was learning, or vice versa, it always made him feel better.
With just that little boost he felt he could finish the last set of rooms, they were almost done. He broke the door again like all the others, Dean stepped up and Cas started to move toward the next one.
"It's ducked down by the door," Dean said, Cas wasn't concerned though; they'd handled that a few times and a well-placed shot usually did the trick. He heard the gun go off and expected that it was fine, but the strangled sound of an injured clone rang out next. Cas' heart was in his throat and he looked back to see that Dean was stuck with his arm still in the room, a familiar face peering up through the hole.
Cas reeled and ran back, "Dee!" he shouted but it wasn't any help. The clone hissed out what Cas could already smell wasn't regular air. His hands were on Dean to pull him away, Charlie opened fire on the clone and killed it instantly. Dean could be pulled free from the door but it was too late, Cas held him close and tilted his head as he tried to wipe the blood away from his eyes. "Dee! Dee can you hear me?"
Dean wasn't answering, both Charlie and Sam were calling his name too but he didn't respond. Dean coughed and wheezed, like he was trying to regain consciousness but it wasn't doing him much good.
"I need to get him out of here," Cas picked Dean up and looked at the other two, "Please wait with Michael and Desirae."
"Wait," Charlie interrupted his escape, "Where are you taking him?"
"To the hospital."
"Do you know where it is?"
"I have a good idea." He said before taking off, he couldn't waste any more time. Whatever it was that the clone did to Dean, Cas wanted it to be as minimal as it possibly could be. He used his wings to propel him forward, the hall sped by in a blur and every door looked the same. He could feel his heart rate increasing as he dashed through the basement like a rat in a maze it had already memorized. Dean groaned and coughed violently, his fingers dug into Cas' shirt.
"Cas…" he whined and broke Castiel's heart a little more.
"It's okay, Dee." Cas said the only thing that he could think of, "It's okay. It's going to be okay."
Cas burst out of the basement labyrinth again and passed Michael and Desirae again, he didn't bother to listen to anything they said and just kept moving. He didn't have time to stop.
Up the last set of stairs, down the hall and through the front door – Castiel's wings spread and he took off immediately. "I know you don't like to fly, I'm sorry." he told Dean as he felt Dean's fingers loosen on his shirt before his boyfriend's arm fell limp altogether. "It's okay," he said with tears filling his eyes. "It's okay, it's okay."
The countryside flew by and he could see the city laid out ahead, he didn't question how he knew where the hospital was. It snapped to his mind when he needed it and that was all he could ask of his brain. He scanned the buildings as he flew, he knew that there were a few hospitals but he wanted the closest one. Dean needed the closest one.
The second he spotted it he dove down, he knew he'd raise eyebrows and questions more and more as people saw him but he didn't care. He didn't need to care anymore, it didn't matter if Dean didn't make it out alive. He'd deal with it later.
Castiel ran inside the front door, he curled his wings in to make sure he didn't absently knock anyone over. Considering how fast he had flown it must've only been a few minutes but he wasn't sure, his brain was telling him it had been an eternity already so he wasn't the best judge of time.
"Help!" he shouted as he ran in, people looked at him and their eyes either went to the bloody stain on his side, the wings on his back, or the unconscious man in his arms. "He's not breathing, please help!" Cas cried as he watched nurses hurrying around to his side, "Please help him." He didn't know what to do but they were quick to get Dean onto a stretcher. Cas followed, hoping they'd let him.
"What happened?" Someone asked, he didn't know who.
"I think it was some sort of poisonous gas," he really didn't know what it was, it could've been anything knowing those experiments.
They didn't let him go with, he was stopped in a waiting area and told someone would like to speak with him about 'his friend's information.' Cas was nervous but he had nothing else he could do, Dean was out of his hands now. So he sat in the waiting room, trying to catch up with what the hell just happened. It went so fast, his enhanced reflexes didn't help him at all.
"Castiel?" A familiar voice chimed in and caught his attention. At first he was worried but then he spotted Garth standing by a vending machine. "What are you doing- are you bleeding!? Is that your blood? What happened?"
Cas let him run through a bunch of questions as he just half listened tiredly, "Dean got hurt," he said finally and dropped his face into his hands, "He's hurt and he might die." He heard his voice break and felt a tickle run down his forearms as tears fell freely. A sob shook him and tore up his throat, he couldn't speak anymore.
Dean. Dean was all he could think about. He needed to see Dean, needed to know that Dean was okay.
Garth didn't say anything, or if he had Cas wasn't listening. He couldn't do anything. He hadn't even checked if Dean was still alive when they arrived, he just handed his body off to strangers. But if Dean was alive they'd save him, right?
"Cas," Bobby was there now, a firm hand resting on Castiel's shoulder. "Whatever it was, it wasn't your fault."
Cas didn't look up, instead he just turned and dropped his head against Bobby's shoulder. He couldn't answer, had no words to speak with. His chest felt like it was being dragged underwater, deeper and deeper until the pressure was too much. His stomach was tied in knots and he felt like he might throw up. The pounding in his head hadn't slowed down either, it just continued on a rhythm that gave him a headache and made his face feel like it was burning.
It hurt. The idea that he might have just lost Dean hurt more than anything else he'd been through. A scar on his skin was nothing, he'd take a thousand more if he could just keep Dean with him.
"I need him!" Cas blurted out in a wail and pressed his face down harder, Bobby didn't flinch and just held onto him firmly. "I need him, I can't lose him," he looked up at Bobby with frantic eyes, "Is he going to be okay?"
"I don't know," Bobby was honest but it didn't comfort him.
Cas just stared at Bobby for a few seconds as he realized that there was no way to tell if Dean would be okay. Not yet. He'd have to wait. He'd just sit there and rot until Dean came back to him alive.
Dean would come back to him. Dean wouldn't die.
Cas took a shaky breath and tried to understand.
Dean would come back. Dean wouldn't die.
Cas took another breath, trying to breathe deeper, trying to calm down.
Dean wouldn't die, he would come back.
Bobby sighed lightly and gave Cas a comforting squeeze.
Dean would come back.
Cas could tell Bobby wasn't calm either, Bobby's hand was shaking.
Dean wouldn't die.
Bobby was scared too, neither of them had any answers.
Dean wouldn't come back.
Castiel tried to breathe but it shuddered in his throat and stopped.
Dean would die.
He swallowed but his throat felt like it had closed up and he coughed, coughing turned to sobbing.
"Dee…" he whimpered and collapsed against Bobby anyway, "I'm so scared, Dee…"
It was nothing but silence for a while, just a few minutes had passed but Castiel was already living in a void. Time didn't mean anything to him, it was all forever until Dean came back. A nurse approached and tried to ask Cas some questions when she noticed that he was covered in dried blood and that wasn't just the colour of his clothing.
Cas didn't pay attention anymore, he felt numb as he was led to a room to be analyzed. He didn't care that everyone was staring at him, he hardly noticed. Bobby probably ended up answering every question, questions about Cas and Dean. Castiel stared at the floor with half-lidded eyes as a nurse inspected his injuries, he felt some pain but it didn't register like it had before. He couldn't even tell what pain was coming from where, it was all just hurting.
He said nothing, he couldn't bring himself to speak up when asked anything. He was grateful for Bobby and Garth being there, Bobby could tell them about who Dean was and Garth could at least direct their contact information to Michael or Charlie. Cas just let them fix him up, he let time slip by and it was a lot of waiting around. He did end up getting stitches, it was a surprise to him but he didn't complain about it.
Cas expected that the hospital would be scary, that it'd feel too much like an experiment table. But it wasn't like that at all, people were bustling around everywhere – some well and some not. The staff were relatively friendly despite his disposition, though maybe that was why. He was aware that there was a relatively steady stream of tears on his face throughout most of the experience.
Bobby tried to tell him to cheer up, that Dean had a good chance but he couldn't drag his hopes up to let them break again. He needed to save that for the end, whatever that outcome might be.
With his stitches in and some attempt at comforting words from a doctor, Cas moved back to the waiting room where Bobby and Garth were sitting. As the clock ticked away he felt the initial wave of despair lighten up on him, leaving only a fissure to ache in its path. Cas swallowed, his mouth was dry now. He looked at Bobby with tired eyes, "So… have they said anything?"
"Not yet," Bobby looked apologetic, Cas felt like he should be apologizing to Bobby and not the other way around. He should've kept Dean safe, Bobby trusted him to do it.
"What about Jet?" he needed to get some good news. Something. Anything.
"He's stable now, they said they would have to remove more of his arm to make sure it was clean and manageable." Garth answered, he sounded upbeat though it was a softened version of his usual demeanour. "It was a bit touch and go at first, but he pulled through and now they said he just needs to be monitored for a while. Should be fine."
Castiel managed to smile a little, "That… that's good news." He exhaled a bit easier and tried to feel relaxed. "Thank you."
Bobby pat Cas' arm, seeming like he was about to say something but he ended up frowning and looking at other people in the waiting area. "You mind not takin' pictures?"
They didn't say anything, just put their phones down.
"It's okay," Cas looked at Bobby, trying his best not to look as exhausted as he felt. Judging by Bobby's expression it wasn't working too well. "I don't really care if they do, it doesn't matter."
"Considering we've had a few bloody people come in here from the same household, I imagine we'll be talking to the cops soon." Garth scratched the back of his head, "I mean I hope not, I don't know how to explain the basement stuff…"
"You won't have to," Cas assured him, "You're barely involved."
"Hey, I'm here aren't I? I'm as involved as any of you." Garth smiled at him, "I ain't no fair-weather friend."
"I appreciate it," Cas felt like his attempt at being more energetic was backfiring and he felt even more tired. How long would he have to wait to hear about Dean? The longer he waited the more it scared him. Was it good to wait that long? Were they making sure Dean was stable before telling anyone anything?
"Hey," Bobby said and scared him a little, "It's okay if you need to take a nap, I'll wake you up if anything happens."
Cas wanted to deny the offer but he needed the energy. "Okay…"