The fire went on burning until slowly it started fading away. First from my toes and fingers then my arms and legs. As the fire started to slowly extinguish I was able to pick up bits of conversation. Nothing made sense to me. "As rightful chief he gave his permission…" "They told him she died…" "What if she is too broken like he said?"

When the last of the fire burned away inside my heart, I felt a heavy thud as it beat its final time. I slowly opened my eyes and cautiously took in my surroundings. I didn't recognize where I was. I was laying on some sort of hospital bed in a room that looked like an office more than a hospital room.

"Bella?"

In the millisecond it took me to freak out at the sound of another voice I launched myself off the bed and stood facing the direction the voice had come from. I was prepared to defend myself from whatever danger I found. Standing several feet away from me was Alice. She was watching me curiously. Then she smiled and I couldn't help but smile back. I had missed her so much. I took a step towards her. "Alice." I whispered unsure of my voice. She stepped towards me and held out her arms. I launched myself into her and wrapped my arms tightly around her.

"It's okay Bella. You are safe. I wont let anyone hurt you again."

"What happened? Where am I? The last thing I remember was Victoria and then falling."

"We got there too late to stop her from pushing you. I saw you just as you hit the rocks and we got you onto the beach right after. Your injuries were not survivable for a human." She paused to wait for me to come to the right conclusion.

"I'm like you now?"

"Yes. It was the only way we could save you."

"But the treaty with the wolves. You will be in danger now because of this."

"Jacob Black gave… us permission to help you. In fact he pretty much demanded."

I looked at her in astonishment. "Why would he do that? After everything it would be so much easier if he had just let me go."

"He cares about you Bella. I know what you and he have been through and you may not believe it right now but he cares a great deal about you."

I shook my head. "It doesn't matter now any ways. He needs to go on with his life and forget about me. Im too broken to be good for anyone."

"Bella, there is someone who would like to talk with you. He wont force himself on you but he would really like to speak with you."

"Who is it?"

"Edward."

I stood deathly still for a moment. He was here somewhere in this house. How much did he know. How did he feel now that I was a vampire too? He always denied me when I asked him to turn me.

As if she could read my thoughts Alice began answering some of my questions. "Edward knows everything and he was the one who turned you Bella. He was the one that got Jacob's permission to do it. He pulled you off the rocks, I was on top of the cliff helping the wolves finally kill Victoria."

I stared at her in shock.

"Can he come in?"

I turned away from her and faced the window. I looked out at the forest. I nodded my head slowly. I heard her heels clicking on the floor and the door being opened. Her foot steps faded as another pair of foot steps came into the room and stood behind me.

I kept my back to him as he started to speak. He kept apologizing for leaving me. When he explained how he had lied about not wanting me anymore because he felt he was protecting me. I turned to face him, my red eyes flashing dangerously.

"You. broke. me! You ripped my heart apart so badly it wouldn't heal. There was never any chance of me moving on with Jacob or anyone! I tried so hard to let you go. I fought through the nightmares and the panic attacks. I nearly ripped myself apart trying so hard to love Jacob, to be what he needed me to be, to not think of you when I made love with him. And for what? For a lie you told in some stupid attempt to protect me? "

His head hung down in guilt. "If I had known. If I hadn't been so focused on protecting you from what I thought were the real dangers I would have seen what my leaving would do to you."

"How could you not know the devastation you would leave behind? You knew how I felt about you. I loved you so much that I begged you time and again to change me so we would never be separated. It wasn't some teenage crush, Edward." I flinched at the sound of his name coming from my lips.

"Bella I never doubted that you loved me. But I thought with time you would move on and have a happy life safe from me and any influence from vampires."

I growled at him. "I wish I could show you what you left behind. I have never healed, I did the best I could to move on. But obviously I failed miserably. Not only did you damage me because of how you left me but Charlie was hurt seeing me like that. And… Jacob. He was the one piece of happiness I had for so long. But even he wasn't enough and I ended up hurting him. He gave me everything and I just couldn't let go of you. I couldn't let him behind the wall I had built around that part of my heart. Then we had our daughter and you would think that would be enough to heal me and make me happy. But of course it wasn't. I am ashamed to say how much I used to wish she was yours. And now here you stand telling me it was all a lie to protect me and you're sorry. Are you expecting me to just run into your arms and everything will go back to how it was?"

"I will spend the rest of eternity trying to make up for what I did Bella. I don't expect you to forgive me that easily. I have had glimpses of how you were. And I don't know if I will ever be able to forgive myself for what I did."

"You were at my graduation weren't you? I didn't just imagine it?"

"Yes I was there. I was also at the graduation party afterwards and I followed you home."

"Do you come in to my room that night?"

He nodded "I waited until you were asleep and then I climbed in the window. I watched you leave the party with Angela and I wanted to see why you were so upset. You had your arms wrapped around your chest much like they are now and then I listened as you cried yourself to sleep. I saw your journal…"

"You read my journal?"

Frowning Edward nodded. "Yes."

My body started to shake all over. It reminded me of Jacob when he first started transforming into a wolf. "You read it and knew what I was going through and chose to walk away again?"

"I thought Jacob would make you happy. As far as I knew he was a safe human and could give you everything I couldn't. Your last entry even said you were going to move on and let your self love him. I couldn't take that possibility away from you. It killed me to leave you that night. "

"Jacob and I never stood a chance because no matter how hard I tried I couldn't let you go. No matter how hard he begged me to. I could see how much I was hurting him but I couldn't stop wishing for you."

Edward took a step towards me and my hands balled into fists. "I am here now Bella. I wont ever leave your side again." He tried to come closer but I was instantly on the other side of the room.

"Stop!" I ran through the open door and instantly recognized where I was. It was the Cullen's house just outside of Forks. I took off out of the house with no real idea where I was going. I let instinct take over and guide my feet. When I finally stopped I was on top of the cliff staring down at the rocks that should have taken my life.