"Bella?"

Jacob walked up behind me cautiously. I kept my back to him as I stared down at the jagged rocks.

I spoke quietly. "I was ready to die. I welcomed it. When Victoria pushed me over the edge I reveled in the feeling of release. All the hurt and pain fell away for just a moment and I could breath again. I could almost feel Emmie in my arms. And I knew that as soon as I took my last breath I would be with her again. You would be free of the burden of guilt and Charlie wouldn't have to worry about me anymore. I was ready."

"You wanted to die?" Jacob's voice trembled.

I nodded silently.

"Did Victoria really push you Bella? Or did you jump?"

"She pushed me." I turned and looked at him in confusion.

"What? It's not like you haven't tried it before."

I heard a sharp intake of breathe from behind Jacob. Edward was standing there looking at me with an expression so filled with pain and guilt I had to look away.

"She jumped off a cliff?"

"Not just any cliff, this exact one. She jumped off the other side where there are fewer rocks. She did a lot of things back then because of you." Jacob spat at Edward.

I watched as his face scrunched up as he stared angrily at Edward. I heard Edward moan in pain.

"Jacob what are you doing to him?"

"I am showing him what he left behind."

I watched Edward's face contort in pain and his body bent over from the weight of it all. My heart throbbed agonizingly at the pain he was experiencing through Jacob's memories of me.

And then I could see it all too. I saw the day in the forest when he told me I wasn't good enough and he didn't want me. I remembered the months of constant nightmares and Charlie trying to coax me out of extreme depression. I saw myself when I came to Jacob's for the first time. I was pale and so thin. My arms never unwrapping from around my chest. I saw myself jumping off the cliff. I saw it all. My body started trembling and my legs gave out. I fell to the ground my hands gripping the grass and dirt underneath them. I closed my eyes trying to stop the memories but it was no use.

"Jake…" I whimpered quietly. He turned his attention from Edward and was instantly by my side. He had seen enough of my panic attacks to recognize the signs. He had always been the only one who could get me through them.

"Deep breaths Bella. Open your eyes and look at me, that's right. See I am right here with you." He put my hand over his heart. I concentrated on his steady heartbeat. The rest of the world disappeared and it was just Jacob and I. I felt a wave of calm slowly wash over me. I moved my hand away from Jacob's chest and stood up. When I pulled my eyes away from Jacob's I saw we weren't alone. Edward was still there but now Alice and Jasper were standing beside him. I stared at Jasper for a minute. He had a strange expression I couldn't interpret. Alice was holding his hand tightly. Edward kept looking at Jasper out of the corner of his eye.

"Bells, I brought you some stuff I thought you might want." Jacob handed me my old duffle bag.

Curiously I took it and looked inside. There were a few pictures of Charlie, Emma and I, some of my books, Emmie's stuffed wolf and her baby blanket. My hand closed tightly around the blanket and I closed my eyes against the tears I would never be able to shed again. I felt another wave of calm wash her me. "Thank you, Jacob."

"You're welcome Bells."

"Watch over Charlie for me."

"You know I will."

I gave him a small smile. "Goodbye Jacob…" I started to walk away but he reached out and grabbed my arm. I looked up at him.

"Bella… I don't regret a moment of our life together. I need you to know that. I know you think you broke me, like he broke you. But I knew what I was getting when we started dating. I wasn't some dumb kid. I loved you and I still do. That wont ever change. I think I understand your feelings for him now though. Im not sure what the vampire equivalent to imprinting is called but whatever they call it, thats the bond you share with him. I never understood that until now, watching him feel your pain as intensely as you feel it and then watching you collapse knowing the pain he was feeling from the memories I was showing him.

For werewolves imprinting is a complete bonding. And to try and separate the two who have imprinted would be devastating to both people. It's not something that can be healed and neither person would be able to truly move on. As much as it pisses me off to say this… Try to forgive him Bella. You will be happier if you do." He pulled me into a hug. "I will miss you Bells." he whispered in my ear before releasing me.

I gently caressed the side of his face. "Be happy Jake." With a sigh I turned and walked away. Alice took my arm and I leaned on her. Jasper walked beside Alice and Edward walked slowly behind us. I could feel a constant wave of calm floating around me. I looked at Jasper out of the corner of my eye. He still had the same strange expression on his face that I saw on the cliff.

"Are you ready to leave Forks?" Alice asked me cautiously.

"I need to make one more stop."

"We need to take you hunting first."

I nodded.

"Do you want us all to take you hunting?"

Without looking at the others. "Can it just be you and I?"

"Sure! Edward and Jasper can take your bag back to the house and get ready for our trip."

Jasper offered to take my bag and I handed it over to him. Edward kept his distance from me. Then Alice and I took off running into the forest. She gave me a quick hunting lesson, although she said most of our hunting is instinctual. I managed to take down a couple of deer and to my surprise a rather large mountain lion. He tasted better and filled me more than the deer. As we walked back to the Cullen house I asked Alice about Jasper's expression back on the cliff. She hesitated for a minute before responding.

"You know that Jasper can control the emotions of people around him. But did you ever think how he is affected by the emotions he feels coming from them?"

"I never thought about that actually."

"He can sense what people are feeling which is how he knows how to calm them. The emotions that were coming from you were almost more than he could handle. He hadn't felt anything that all consuming in is entire life. It took all his effort to create the calm for you. He doesn't know how you have coped so long with all those feelings."

"I haven't coped. That was always part of the problem."

"But you tried. That is more than a lot of people are able to do."

"I had to, first for Charlie, then Jacob and then for Emmie. It got a little easier after she was born. But after she was gone there was just nothing left. I couldn't see an end to the pain."

"I am so sorry Bella. I was on my way to you when I saw Victoria's plan and knew you wouldn't put up a fight. I called Edward and we got there as fast as we could."

"Will I ever be happy again Alice?"

She stared off into the distance. I recognized the look she always got when she was looking into the future. I waited quietly while she looked into mine.

"Yes. You need time to heal and this time you will heal. You will always miss your daughter but you will be happy again. I promise."

"Thanks Alice."

She hugged me quickly and then we stepped out of the trees into the clearing around the Cullen house. Jasper and Edward were waiting by the car for us.

By the time I got to Charlie's house it was late at night and he was asleep. I stood by his bedside and watched him sleep for a while. His eyes were puffy and red, he had been crying. Jacob would have already told him I was gone. I felt a pang of regret and sadness. I would miss Charlie the most out of the people that were left. I hoped with my whole heart that he would be able to pick up the pieces and go on. Maybe find a nice woman to spend the rest of his life with.

"I love you dad." I whispered and then quietly slipped out of the house and into the backseat of Edward's car beside Alice.

I watched until the house disappeared and then I laid my head on Alice's shoulder and stayed silent for the rest of the car ride.