Prank
"Mrs. Watney," Mark said, handing Mindy a flute of champagne.
"Mr. Watney," she said smiling as she took it.
"Cool party," Mark said as they look out across the dance floor of the Hyatt Regency's Imperial Ballroom.
"Yeah," she said. "Wonder who it's for?"
He laughed and kissed her. "Probably somebody cool, way cooler than us."
She nodded and finished her champagne. "Well, we should take the opportunity and dance then, hmm?"
"Absolutely, Mrs. Watney," he said, and swept her out onto the dance floor.
The King and Queen of England smiled at Mark and Mindy as the danced by them. The royals went entirely unnoticed, and they laughed. The bride and groom were completely lost in each other. It didn't matter that there were twelve hundred of the most famous and influential people on the earth in the room, they were just background noise to the man in the tuxedo and the woman in the white lace and satin.
"You are so beautiful," Mark said with an expression of happiness and love on his face as they danced.
"I feel beautiful," Mindy said.
"You are, Min, so much," he said, and kissed her again.
"You know there's a bridal suite with your name on it upstairs, right," Mindy's maid of honor, Clara said as she danced up next to them.
Mindy scowled at her playfully as Mark greeted Clara's dance partner. "How're you doing, Rich?"
Looking slightly amazed at who he was dancing with, Rich Purnell replied, "Really good, Mark."
Mark chuckled as they danced away. "Well, Clara seems to be recovering," he observed.
"She divorced that piece of shit two years ago, it's about time," Mindy said.
"Rich in for a good night?"
Mindy snickered. "Oh yeah." she looked thoughtful for a moment. "Clara has been asking me some pointed questions lately about dating outside her usual sphere of lawyers and doctors."
"She's a district attorney," Mark said. "Sort of corrals her into a certain social group."
"It does," Mindy said. "She hates it. Theo was another lawyer, and the worthless, ungrateful… asshole." She fumed for a moment. "Well, he's gone, and I hope he's enjoying being saddled with that bimbo and their brat. So, yeah Clara talked to me about some prospects that would be here tonight."
Marks eyebrows rose. "And you set her on Rich?"
Mindy's eyes twinkled and Mark laughed at her devious look. "He's so shy. I mean he's fine if there's no possibility of romance, but if there's an unattached woman in the room he turns into a door mouse. I told Clara she might have to work on that wall, but once she gets beyond it she'd find a really cool, if a bit socially inept, guy." She smiled as she watched her best friend dance across the room with the amazed astrodynamicist in tow. "Looks like she's done a good job."
"Um, Min, socially inept is understating it pretty dramatically, and I'm fairly sure Rich is a… inexperienced when it comes to women. If you know what I mean," Mark said.
"Yeah, I figured," Mindy said. "I told Clara I work in a building full of forty year old virgins." She grinned. "Don't worry, she'll help him negotiate the curves."
Mark looked out across the Ballroom. When it became apparent that Mindy's father was unprepared to fund the kind of event that Mindy and Mark's wedding was becoming, Annie sent a quiet call out among their more well-to-do fans. Several of them were more than willing to fund the entire affair, but Annie had talked them into a shared wedding fund that would cover the costs. All five of them were at the ceremony, and now at the reception, Elon Musk, chief among them. Both Mark and Mindy had been surprised when he had offered them high level positions within SpaceX at their first meeting. He had also been gracious and understanding when they told him they were very loyal to NASA.
Annie and Roberta appeared out of the throng on the dance floor and walked up to Mark and Mindy. Annie and her wife were the picture of haute couture. Annie's off the shoulder, knee length, light blue creation from Hong Kong was paired with Roberta's slinky and spangled black form fitting dress from Paris.
Mark took a moment to appreciate Annie's wife.
Roberta was as mixed as it got. Her mother was half African American and half Vietnamese, Her father half British, half Native American. She was also strikingly gorgeous. With wavy raven black hair framing a beautifully exotic face, and her caramel colored skin glowing in in the artificial light, Mark was well aware of what Annie saw in her wife. He smirked at the Media Director. The only time Mark thought he saw the real Annie Montrose was in the company of Roberta. Annie was smiling and laughing in a way she never did in her official capacity, and the gazes that she shared with Roberta were the same as the ones that Mark shared with his wife.
"Having fun, Annie?" he asked.
"I deserve it," she said confidently. "All that work paid off."
Mindy leaned in and hugged her. "Thank you so much," she said. "Clara, Mom, Marks Parents, they were all overwhelmed. Most of the wedding planners we talked to were terrified of taking this part of it on, so thanks, you did awesome."
Annie laughed. "It's amazing what a few well-placed phone calls and liberal use of your names accomplishes," she said. "The people at U.H. were initially not as receptive as they were when you and I met them and toured the chapel." She laid her hand on Mindy's shoulder. "Thanks for letting me have this event," she said as she looked around the Grand Ballroom. "I know doing two hours of handshakes and small talk in the reception line was a pain, but it'll pay off in huge ways."
"Always scheming, that wife o' mine," Roberta said.
"Mars colonization is going to have to be a planetary effort," Annie said. "With all these people on our side it'll be a lot easier to get the governments on board."
Roberta smiled at Annie lovingly. "She's telling all of them 'more money for space, less for guns and bombs'. Changin' the world, my Annie."
Mark smiled at Annie. "You see Teddy holding court with the President, the Chinese Premier, and the Russian President?"
Annie nodded. "I assigned them to him," she said. "He's getting them up to speed on the latest proposal for Ares Five."
"Two years," Mark said, looking into infinity. "Two years on the surface."
Mindy laid her hand on his arm. "You did it with no planning, no resources, and solo," she said with pride gleaming in her eyes.
"We're going back, Mark," Annie said fiercely. "We're going back to stay."
(*)
"Now 'Annah?"
"Yeah, I'll get them."
(*)
Sitting on Mark's lap as he nuzzled her neck Mindy was contemplating making their escape when she saw a woman wave at her from a curtained alcove down the wall from where they sat. She waved back and then froze. It was Hannah, her savior. Hannah winked and nodded her head toward the inside of the alcove, then she disappeared behind the curtain.
"Mark, wait!" she whispered.
He stopped kissing her neck and looked up. "Thought you liked where this was going."
She smiled coyly. "I do, but there's a friend I haven't introduced you too yet. Come on," she said, and pulled him to his feet as she stood.
She led him toward the alcove and when the band broke between songs and the crowd in the ballroom applauded she took her opportunity and slid behind the curtain, dragging Mark along.
"Don't look behind you," a voice whispered in their ears.
They heard a click and a few beeps. A hand appeared from behind them with an open makeup compact held in it. Hannah waved it up Marks body and it chimed and a green light shown in the mirror when she got to his cufflink on his right hand. Snickering, Hannah pulled it from his wrist and dropped it in a black bag. She finished scanning Mark and started on Mindy. A pin, two small fuzzy white patches of fluff, and a small white lace rose that was stuck to her dress went in the bag.
"I think that's all of them," Hannah said as she stepped around to face Mark and Mindy.
Mindy smiled and hugged her. "Mark, this is Hannah, the woman I told you about."
Mark smiled up at the tall, very pretty, powerfully built woman, and he shook her hand. "Good to meet you. What was all that about?"
Hannah chuckled. "Come on up and I'll show you." She said, and led them up a small service stair behind the hall to a darkened lighting booth that mirrored the one in use at the opposite end of the hall for the band. Janice sat on a stool waiting for them. She rose and shook their hands.
"Bonsoir, Mark, Mindy," she said. "Congratulations."
"A pleasure to officially meet you, Janice. You guys look great by the way. " Mindy said as she took her hand. "Thank you, you saved my life."
"Non, she would 'ave missed."
"And you were only twelve feet away," Hannah said. "She wouldn't have got a second shot off."
"You're more confident than I am about that," Mindy said skeptically.
"Our analysts reviewed the scene," Janice said. "Zey are confident you would 'ave prevailed."
Mark hugged Mindy to him. "Well thanks for not putting that to the test," he said. "And thanks for saving her."
"We were not saving Mindy," Janice said. "We were saving number seven."
Hannah laughed at their expressions. "We didn't want Mindy having blood on her hands," she said. "I was fairly convinced she'd kill the stupid numpty. Besides, we like seven as a living example of why not to fuck with the two of you."
Mark cocked his head to the side. "Who are you guys?" he asked, mystified.
Janice laughed. "As 'Annah told Mindy, we are your protection, provided by some very generous and wealtzy benefactors."
"They hired us while you were still in space," Hannah told Mark. "They knew some crazy person would wind up stalking you, so they formed a small enterprise to protect you. When Mindy entered the picture our mission expanded to encompass her."
"A small enterprise?" Mark asked.
""Our employers set up an endowment to fund us. Zat allows us to 'ave an office with some very talented people zat watch people watching you." Janice said. "When zey reach a certain level of obsession we monitor zem with personal surveillance. If zey present a direct threat we… intervene."
"Seven got by us," Hannah said. "She went from four to ten on our threat scale overnight." Hannah clenched her teeth. "You did very well, Mindy. We messed up, and you never should have had to take her on." She smiled. "That said, I'd like to spar with you some time, see what you've got."
Mark shook his head in amazement. "What was with all the stuff you pulled off us?" he asked.
Both women giggled. "Listening devices and trackers." Hannah said, looking at the packed hall below them. "There may be a who's who of celebrities and politicians in that room, but that's nothing compared to the cream of international espionage that are down there." She pointed to a man in a dark blue suit that was talking with the Dutch ambassador. "That is Jason Hempworth. He's the current version of James Bond in real life. Most accomplished agent MI5 has." She drew their attention to another man in a server's uniform. "That is Stanislav Itam, He's the Russian version. Over there is Ethan Thomas, the CIA's best man. It's amazing they haven't had a brawl yet. There's at least two more, I'm certain."
"Are we in any danger?" Mindy asked.
The two women laughed. "Non," Janice said. "You're as safe 'ere as you could be."
"No," Hannah said and took her hand. "We just wanted to congratulate you and run an idea past you."
"How'd you get a credential?" Mark asked, and then he shook his head. "Never mind, I can guess."
"What idea?" Mindy asked.
"We've never had an operation like this," Hannah said. "Protecting people is the exact opposite of what we usually do. When I had to expose us it was a major cock up, and that was two to many. I explained our plan to our employers, and they agree. We think it's best if we operate with you and Mark in the team. We can let you know if there's a threat, and you can let us know if you suspect anything."
"Sounds like a good idea," Mark said, and Mindy nodded.
"Très chouette, we will come to your 'ome in a few weeks to talk," Janice said, and then laughed. "After you return from Tahiti."
"How? Never mind," Mark said. "No secrets, huh."
"Not from us," Hannah said. "And speaking of that, let's have some fun."
(*)
Ethan Thomas was becoming concerned. He hadn't heard a peep out of Mark's bug in five minutes. The last time he had marked their position they had been sitting against the west wall making out. Mindy had mentioned an introduction and the signal had gone silent. He was nervously scanning the hall for the bride and groom, and he was getting progressively more agitated as continued to not find them.
Stanislav Itam absentmindedly handed a flute of champagne to a guest and wondered at how quickly Mark and Mindy had disappeared. The positioner still had them within the building but that was the limit of its resolution, the audio receiver in his ear hadn't made a sound in a concerning amount of time. He set down his tray and went to find them.
Jason Hempworth saw Ethan and Stan starting to panic. He understood why, they had bugs on the couple too, and silence was never good. Suddenly his earpiece came to life.
(*)
Hannah was having trouble keeping her laughter in as she opened the small black bag. "okay, go" she mouthed silently to Mark and Mindy.
"Mmm, here in the lighting both?" Mindy said in a low husky voice.
Mark growled lustily. "They're not using this one, and…What!"
"Ahh!" they both yelled and Hannah dropped the contents of the bag in her champagne.
Tears of mirth sparkled in Janice's eyes, and she pealed with laughter as she watched the reaction on the ballroom floor.
(*)
Five men nearly ran across the floor of the ballroom to the alcove access for the west end lighting booth. Struggling for position, they charged up the stairs and burst through the door into the booth. Mindy sat on Marks lap at the far end of the booth smiling at them, and they were flanked by two beautiful women.
"Hello boys," Hannah said in a fair imitation of May West. "Come in, come in." she motioned the five men into the small booth. "Mark, Mindy this is Stan Itam in the front here, Jason Hempworth next, Hello, Jason."
"Hannah," he said in an amused and peeved voice.
She snickered. "Ethan Thomas," she continued.
"Hannah, good to see you," Ethan said.
"Is that Pierre DeSaint under that awful fake beard?" Hannah asked.
"'Allo 'Annah," Pierre said. "Janice, c'est bon de te voir, mon petite amour."
"Pierre," Janice said with a blushing smile.
"And you I don't know," Hannah said to the last man.
"Ho Chen," The man said.
"Well, Chen, welcome to our little club," Hannah smiled at them with the same expression a cat would wear after eating a pet shop full of canaries. "This is going to look terrible on your official reports tomorrow morning, good thing you won't be reporting it."
"We won't, eh?" Ethan said with a smirk.
"Non," Janice said. "We will keep zis our little secret. Mark and Mindy are quite well protected, as you can see."
"You were the two in the street," Ethan said, chuckling.
"Jan and I are on a permanent detail," Hannah said. "But from time to time we may need a bit of assistance, and that's where you boys come in."
Stan laughed. "Hannah, you ver alvays such a vorthy adversary. Vat do you vish?"
Hannah chuckled. "Thanks, Stan. Sorry I had to shoot you last time, you okay?"
He smiled and held up his left arm. A healed over bullet wound shown on the underside of his upper arm. "Through and through," he said. "Your aim vas perfect. I am sorry sparing my life cost you two your positions at Interpol."
"'S alright, Stan, we've got a better situation now. As to what we want from you," Hannah continued. "We don't know yet. When we do, we'll come to you for a favor. It may be information on a threat, it may be for help in liquidating one. Whatever we ask, it'll fit inside your skill set."
The men nodded.
"It will be a pleasant relief from trying to kill one and ozer, non?" Janice said with a devious smile.
That struck Chen funny and soon all five men were laughing.
(*)
The familiar giggle from the hallway roused Mindy from the bed, and she crept across the bedroom, through the living room area of the suite, and to the door. Looking through the peep hole she saw Clara tugging a smiling and dazed looking Rich Purnell through her door. Laughing quietly she strolled back to the bedroom and her smiling husband.
"Clara and Rich?" he asked.
"Uh huh," she said with a cheek breaking grin.
"Nice job."
"She needs this." Mindy said, and kissed him as she crawled back onto the bed. "Shall we do the same, Mr. Watney?"
"Definitely, Mrs. Watney, definitely."