Here is the Chapter 3 :) Happy reading!

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Instantly, I feel my body turn to ice. The ice is present inside me, until the temperature of my blood. Everything in me becomes cold. The beats of my heart skips a frenetic pace. They beats fast enough to let me dizziness and nausea. Jeanine don't seems surprised to see me standing. She just closes the door behind her and stares at me.

I need to move my mouth a few times before I get the words.

- What you ...?

Jeanine stares at me, and her silvery eyes are piercing me from the inside out.

- If you think you are dead, - she says, her voice cold as ice - I assure you: you are not. And do not ask any more questions.

- Then the serum not worked. - I feel a delicious inner satisfaction to utter those words. I almost smile at the idea of Jeanine's hatred speech when she saw her plan fails - I told you to desist. It would be less painful to accept yourself you will never control me. None of the serums you created works in me.

Jeanine smiles, but her smile don't contain happiness.

- Do not say what you do not know, Beatrice. You just woke up the effect of paralysis serum. This is enough to prove you wrong.

- Paralysis Serum?

What are she talking about?

- Do you think you would be alive if I had given you the Death Serum? Although you are divergent, I think it would be too optimistic that you believe that.

A discharge of anger through my veins.

In the next second, I have Jeanine's neck blouse in my fists, and approach her body. Even so the woman reacted somehow.

- What is it that you injected me?

- Something much better than the Death Serum. You are alive, right?

- Answer me!

I beat her head against the wall. The corner of her lip curls a little, the only sign of pain on her face.

- You left me alive to try more of your crap on me? You wanted to torture me a bit before you kill me? Why did not you killed me?

- If I knew you'd react like this ...

- Answer me!

And then she starts laughing. It's a strange laugh, without any hint of humor or happiness. It's a tired laugh. The laughter that takes the place of frustration.

- Beatrice Prior, to be so smart you are still naive...

My hands clenches over her blouse.

- What do you think I am? Hm? A sadistic? Some kind of villain in those awful books that teenagers read? Tell me honestly, why I bother to hurt you for personal reasons? I did what I had to do to develop a serum that affects divergents. I wasn't successful. I no longer need you. I will find another way in someone less useless.

- You are a ...

- Crazy? Maybe, maybe. A bitch? Also. But without me the damn who living outside the fence would take us years ago. The fear they have me kept them away. And you, my little "Tris" are stupid enough to believe that I enjoy doing your life miserable - Jeanine violently shakes my hands. - And take your hands off me!

I release her immediately.

The scene before me is too surreal to believe. And I just look at her, mesmerized. For the first time, looking at her face, I don't see the cold emptiness that had become her trademark. No. Looking at her now, I see many emotions. Too many emotions, all confused and mixed, threatening to explode inside her like an erupting volcano. Jeanine is about to start crying.

- Is that what you think, no? You think you know everything. You think you know all my feelings and intentions just by looking at my face. But the truth is that you know nothing. You have no idea what is the real despair. You do not know what is hiding something your entire life, to be a prisoner of your own truth and feel threatened by it every second of your life.

- What are you talking about?

- You have no idea of suffocating feeling of must doing something at any price. One thing that will cost a lot more than you are willing to give ... Damn it! I should have killed you!

She is panting, breathless. I can feel her breath on my face.

- Want to know the truth, Beatrice? You wonders why I did not kill you?

I don't answer. I just stay still, waiting her to speak.

- I do not inject you the Death Serum because I was a coward.

- Coward?

- You made me insane, Beatrice. You made me do things I would never do under normal conditions. You ruined everything. Everything I have built in all my life. I hate you for it. Thanks to you, I do not know who I am.

At that moment, I feel everything change. Absolutely everything. I feel my hate dissipate in the air like smoke. Suddenly, I want to touch her. I don't understand absolutely even a word of what she is talking about, but I hate anything that makes her suffer. And I want to hug her. I want to wrap her in my arms and comfort her, hide her under my own skin if necessary. Everything for don't see the pain on her face.

My life has been crazy since I saw her for the first time. I don't think it matters now, not with Jeanine looking at me that way. It is as if we were seeing for the first time. She are panting, her heart in her throat. I do not know what I'm doing. Maybe I'm really mad. I want to immerse myself in this madness and never leave.

For the first time I see traces of fatigue and worry on her face. Then I realize that I'm at her home. In her room. I even had slept in her bed. I want to say something about it, but I can not speak. And she can not even catch her breath. And I can not stop looking at her. In the end, she found a way to control me. And without meaning to.

Suddenly the distance bothers me.

I feel a painful pressure in the stomach. An order, I don't care. I move forward, while she takes a step backward, perhaps frightened by something she saw in my eyes. With every step I give, she backs, until she has nowhere to escape and is caught by the wall. Silence doesn't exist, because I still gasped and Jeanine was breathing very loud while shaking.

None dares to look away. The pain in my stomach stops a bit, but still feel a pressure in my bowels.

I'm able to recognize it: desire.

Perhaps she saw it too, because she closes her eyes and puts her hands to her head, trying to control her trembling. Her eyes are dry, there is no danger of crying, but the tremors increases while she does futile efforts to regain her composure.

I break the distance between us and try to hug her. I never thought I would comfort her, but that only made more evident the truth: I can no longer lie to myself. Beyond how I hate her, I desire her. Every little bit of Jeanine. And that truth will not go away.

Without thinking, I take another step forward. Jeanine don't seems able to move a centimeter. Our eyes are together like magnets, I can see every detail of her face. Moved by something like an instinct, I kiss her. At the beginning of a forced way, simply pressing my lips to her's unexpectedly. After a few seconds, she relaxes in my arms and corresponds me. Everything seems wrong there, and good at the same time.

I fit perfectly in the corners of her arms. Her lips seem made for mine's. Our movements are synchronized as if this is the umpteenth time we kissed, not the first. I love the taste of her mouth.

That kiss meant for me, above all, acceptance. I was renouncing to avoid the inevitable.

While I kiss her, I let the thoughts to flow freely in my head. I allow myself to think about the things I've been pushing to the back of my mind all this time.

I was fascinated by her since the first time that we were face to face.

Something in her stern face always made my heart flutter. I felt attracted to her since the first time we had a real conversation, that afternoon in her office, the time I had gone to look for my brother in Erudite.

Although she intimidated me, silently threatening me to confess that I was divergent, even when she stood before me like a snake waiting to strike. However, I could not help but notice how amazing she was. How shiny and smooth her hair looked. How the blue color looked beautiful in her. How her eyes were impressive.

Those damn silvery eyes.

Finally, let me admit that I was in love with her. I wanted to hate her with all my strength, often I wanted to kill her with my own hands, and although she is responsible for all the bad things that were happening to me, I was in love with her.

With all the tranquility and peace in the world, I leave her lips to kiss her nose. On the way, I find her skin mole, and kiss it. Soon I'm kissing all over her face, without any haste or urgency, distributing small kisses. My lips met lumpy skin, and I look strangely the small wounds in her cheek. They are not red, they are a hot pink, almost hidden by the hair. Jeanine sighs in pain as she feels my lips there. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Then I kiss the swollen skin, a kiss longer than others. Then I kiss her forehead. And then I kiss her eyes.

Jeanine sets circles on my back with her thumbs, as if she did not know quite what to do with her hands. Her touch relax me at first, but then, lights a unbearable heat in my belly. I think better and control my hormones. I pull her away from the wall, without receiving much resistance.

- I...

- We'll talk tomorrow - she interrupts.

I agree. Now I'm motivated to the task of embracing her waist and kissing her cheek as we walks to the other end of the bedroom. I sit her on the edge of the bed, and on impulse, I kiss her forehead. She's staring at the floor, not daring to look at me yet. I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable, so I let her look anywhere as I begin my task.

I open the buttons of her white blouse without hesitation. Jeanine stays very still while I undress her, but when I look at her face, she is flushed. Then I take the skirt-pencil blue, trying not to feel too altered to have before me her creamy legs. Her body is very pale, as if she had not taken sunshine in her life. Under the blue bra I can see her pink nipples, without looking too much to not make her feel uncomfortable. I make a mental note to ask later about those scars beneath her breasts.

- Second drawer.

I turn around to open the second drawer of the wardrobe and find a pink nightgown. It's silk, and smells wonderful. I turn around to return to Jeanine. She looks like a little girl.

- Raise your arms.

Reluctantly, Jeanine does what I ask. I put her the nightgown. My hands are kept busy rubbing her shoulders and kissing her on the lips again, deepening the kiss this time. I do everything as slowly as possible. Then I will to bed too, on the left side.

And suddenly I realize that I'm sharing the bed with Jeanine Matthews, and that it's the most relaxing I had felt in my life. Both lie in silence, staring at the dark sky through the glass roof.

- I like the ceiling. - I whisper in comfortable silence.

- It was difficult to find a glass strong enough. - she whispers in response. And suddenly, I feel her hand grabbing mine's. And it feels natural, comfortable. I interlace our fingers.

A while later, Jeanine is sleeping with her head on my shoulder. I have dream, the dream that gives emotional exhaustion, but I don't want to sleep.

I just realize that at last, for the first time, I feel belonging to something. And isn't a faction, is this woman who is breathing quietly in my neck.

But for how long?