The incessant buzzing of the alarm wakes me with a start. Tobias once again must have carried me to bed last night. I shut off the alarm and wonder briefly what it would be like to wake up with Tobias next to me instead of having him across the room and realize I've made my decision. I roll over and look at the couch and disappointment courses through me. He isn't there. I look toward the bathroom but the door is standing wide open and the room is dark. I get up and notice a sheet of paper on the nightstand.
VI
I woke up early and went for a run. I'll be back soon.
I love you.
IV
His note makes me smile. I know he'll be back soon and need a shower so I hurry through my morning routine. Just as I come out of the bathroom the apartment door opens.
"Good morning," he says.
"Good morning. Did you have a nice run?" I ask.
"I did. I really need to get back to my usual workout routine. It makes me feel better." He grabs an outfit from his dresser and goes into the bathroom leaving the door ajar like he always does. When he's done he comes straight to me and lifts me off my feet and places his lips on mine. I lose all sense of time when he kisses me like this. He finally pulls back.
"I made a decision, Tobias," I say, looking directly in his sparkling eyes. "Yes."
"Yeah!" he says, excitement in his voice.
"Yeah!"
With a smile he says, "I'm going to like having you around every morning."
"Me too," I pull his mouth back to mine. I wasn't finished kissing him yet. But once again he pulls away too soon for me and sits me back on my feet. I make an exaggerated pouty face at him, so he leans down and lightly kisses me again.
"I love you, Tobias."
"I love you, too. How about breakfast or do you want to stay here and make out until we have to meet Tori?" he asks with a smirk.
"Don't tempt me mister," I say moving to pull his mouth back to mine when my stomach growls. I look at him bashfully and he grins. "Stupid stomach. I guess it's going to get what it wants." He just laughs, takes me by the hand, and leads me to the cafeteria.
After breakfast, Tobias and I meet Tori in his office. We discuss adding more leaders or leaders-in-training but decide it isn't necessary at this time, and we decide to make the list of available jobs later. Tori and I divide up the remaining paper files and sort through them as Tobias starts sifting through the digital files.
After lunch, Christina and I head to my office. After making all the initial decisions for the party including music, refreshments, and attire, I decide to tell her I'm moving in with Tobias.
"I have some news." She raises her eyes to mine, expectation on her face. "Four and I are moving in together."
"Wow! That's a big step. Are you really ready for that?" I know what she's thinking about, my fear landscape. "Have you two..." She lets the question dwindle, hanging in the air.
"No we haven't slept together, and yes I'm ready to live with him. I thought a lot about it last night and what helps is we'll have separate bedrooms until we're ready to share one. We're getting closer but I'm still not ready to have sex with him quite yet. I honestly don't think he's ready either."
"Will and I are getting closer too but it's hard when there are other people sleeping in the same room," she says matter-of-factly.
"I'm really sorry for the apartment assignment delay. We're still trying to wrap our heads around everything. We finally found the apartment assignment log book, and I'm working on it. You can't imagine how much paperwork there is." I say.
"It's okay, Tris. It isn't your fault our former leaders are criminals," she says to me with a chuckle. "I'm starting to tune Peter out." I groan at the mention of his name.
"That bad?" I ask.
"He's just being his asinine self. I think he'd still complain even if he got everything he wanted."
"I know one more thing he's going to complain about then," I tell her.
"No leadership training position this year?" she asks.
"Technically, it went to me, and Four, Tori, and I decided not to add any other leaders at this time. We're going to see how it works with just the three of us. I hope he doesn't complain too much."
"I'm sure Peter will be fine. Do you know the available jobs yet?"
"Not all of them. There's a control room position available. Will would be ideal for that job. It makes me wish all positions could be assigned instead of chosen based on ranking. Peter may have ranked above you and Will but you two are much more responsible than he ever will be," I say matter-of-factly.
"Will would love working in the control room. Hopefully, no one else will pick that if he's interested."
"My advice is not to talk to him about it around any other initiates. I don't think anyone would take a spot just to spite someone else but you never know." Peter's face flashes in my mind as I say this. I'm sure she's thinking the same thing. "Maybe Peter would. He's as vindictive as they come. Once I know what the available jobs are, I'll let you know." A knock echoes throughout the glass-walled room as Tori and Tobias walk in.
"Ready to go?" Tobias asks. Christina and I get up and walk to the door.
"Let's finalize the plans for the party Wednesday after lunch, Christina," I say. "See you at supper."
"See you later, Tris," she says to me, then she looks at Tobias and Tori, "Four, Tori."
"Tori's going to look at the apartments with us and pick hers also," Tobias says to me. I have no idea where the leaders' private quarters are, so I follow Tobias and Tori. Across the hallway is an unmarked door, and beyond it is a double wide black metal staircase going up a one level. At the head of the stairway is a long hallway with five doors.
"I've been told they're all different but I've never seen them, so shall we take a look?" Tobias says.
Tori takes the first apartment then goes back to the tattoo parlor for the rest of the day. When Tobias opens the third apartment door, I know I'm home. By my sharp intake of breath, he knows I love it. To my left, against the wall, is a bank of glossy white cabinets with black knobs and pulls and full-size glossy white appliances the exact same color as the cabinets. Topping the base cabinets are matte black quartz countertops with little flecks of white glass. In front of the cabinets is a sizable island, big enough to seat approximately eight, made of the same materials and colors as the wall cabinets. The backsplash consists of white, blue, and strategically placed black 1 in x 1 in square glass tiles.
In front of me, across the room, are floor to ceiling windows that stretch from just beyond the cabinets to the wall across the room. Under my feet are the most gorgeous wide plank hand scraped light hardwood floors. The walls are all a pale shade of blue that complement the floors and the backsplash. To my right is a staircase that leads to a second floor and a small basic powder room with a white octagonal tile floor, simple sink and mirror combination, a toilet, and a small linen closet.
"Is this the one?" Tobias quietly asks.
"Can we see upstairs?" I ask, my voice quivering. He takes my hand and leads me up the floating staircase. When I reach the second floor I'm greeted by the same hardwood floors and blue-colored walls. I look around and see four doors. I go to the one directly in front of me and find a small bedroom with a basic closet. I head out of the room and turn down the hallway. I open the next door and find a spacious bathroom. Again it's very basic with octagonal white tile on the floor and subway tile in the walk-in shower, the same blue-painted walls like the rest of the apartment, an old-fashioned claw foot soaker tub next to the shower, toilet, sink and mirror combination, and a large linen closet. Directly across the hall from the bathroom is a bedroom that identically matches the first. I back out of the room and open the final door. In front of me is a spacious master bedroom with large his-and-hers closets. I turn and look up at Tobias with tears overflowing my eyes.
"This can be our home?" I whisper. I notice tears swimming in his eyes also. I run into his arms, and he hold me tightly in silence. Soon he lets me go, takes my face in his hands, and gazes into my eyes.
"I've never had a home before," he says, emotion thick in his voice. "As a child I lived in fear in Marcus' house. The past two years I have lived in doubt in Dauntless' apartment feeling like I didn't fit in. So yes, I would love this to be our home." He gently presses his lips to mine and kisses me.
"I love you," I tell him when we part. "You deserve a home, Tobias. A place to feel safe and loved and to just be yourself."
"My home is where you are, Tris. You make me feel safe. You make me feel loved. I've never been more myself than when I'm with you. I love you … so much." I tilt my head back and his lips land on mine again. Passion bubbles up within me, and I cling to him tighter than I ever have. We break apart and gaze into one another's eyes letting our heart rates return to normal.
After a short silence, Tobias clears his throat and says, "Maybe we should get back to work." I agree with a nod of my head. I'm still a little choked up over his admission. "I have something to show you on the computer." We walk back down to his office, and he locks the door behind us. That seems strange.
"Why'd you lock the door, Tobias?" I ask.
"I found something hidden on the hard drive. For right now I'm only telling you about it. Once we figure out what it means, if it means anything, we'll let Tori know."
"I don't know, Tobias. It doesn't seem right to keep her in the dark immediately. We included her for a reason. I don't think we should be keeping things from her." He flashes a brilliant smile at me.
"Okay. We'll tell Tori about it on Monday. We're all off tomorrow unless there's an emergency. Does that sound reasonable?"
"Look at us compromising. I'm so proud!" He laughs at me and turns the computer on. I stand behind him and peer over his right shoulder. After a few keystrokes a folder appears on the screen. He clicks on it and several other folders appear.
"I haven't been through all these files yet but they were well hidden, even more so than the Erudite war files, which seemed suspicious to me. What I've looked at so far seemed to be generated here at Dauntless and didn't come from Erudite. This file troubles me the most. It was created by Eric." He clicks on the file and up pops two lists of names. I notice his name and mine are on the first list and Peter's names is on the second list. I don't recognize any of the other names. "I'm suspicious the first list of names are suspected Divergents. I think the second list might be names of the people Max warned me about."
"If it's about Divergents, why is your name on the list?" He takes a deep breath and looks over his shoulder at me.
"Because I'm Divergent."