Gloom and Chansey

Professor Oak loved Pokemon. Everyone knew that. As he'd spent his entire life studying them, he could understand many based on their tone and body language. He had created new technologies and an entire database, just to share his knowledge and help others fully appreciate these wonderful creatures. But there was a little secret that he kept, which very few people knew.

Professor Oak could not stand Glooms.

Not that he didn't appreciate them, in their own special fashion. A Gloom was a Pokemon like any other, with its own thoughts, emotions, and quirks. They filled their own little niche and presented him a nice mystery on how some Pokemon could have two potential evolutions instead of one. However, that didn't get past the fact that their smell was obnoxious. Oak hated that smell and could never acquire a nose for it.

The smell did have a purpose. It originated from the honey that the Glooms produced in their saliva. They drooled it constantly and smelling it often made them drool more. Somehow, Oak had no idea how, but that odorous honey attracted all sorts of microbugs which a Gloom loved to eat. Perhaps because it smelled like garbage, the garbage-eating insects were drawn to a Gloom's honey. But that smell, and that drooling habit, Oak had always had a disgust for it.

Most of the time, he simply avoided Glooms. There were over a hundred Pokemon in the Kanto region alone, he figured, so he didn't really have to study each and every one of them. However, a problem had come up around the Gloom's information in the Pokedex database. The information seemed to conflict with itself. And since it had been his assistants who had gotten the conflicting information, it fell to him to go find out the truth. As much as he didn't want to.

The fastest way, he figured, would be to go speak to an expert, someone who could give the information on a personal level. That was why he was here in Celadon City, so he could speak to Erika. Not only did she run the Grass Gym of Kanto, but he was known to be an avid fan of Glooms and Vileplumes. That always struck Oak as a little odd, since she also taught formal flower arrangements that focused on beauty.

Well beauty was in the eye of the beholder. Aside from his usual dislike of Glooms, Oak also had the problem of Erika being picky about when men could enter her Gym. The League had talked her into setting aside hours when the Gym was fully open. They hadn't forced her to make a solid schedule, so he'd called ahead to make sure it was open to him. But he hadn't expected to be faced with a Chansey at the front door.

The large pink Pokemon seemed to be very wound up, even for her species. She bopped back and forth from one foot to the other, swinging her paws. Every three or so 'rounds', she twirled around. And she sang all the time, some happy sugar-inspired song that she danced to. Whatever she was doing, she was delighted to be doing it.

Unfortunately, she was right in front of the Gym door. "Chansey?" Oak asked.

"Dana, dana, dana, chansey!" the Chansey sang, oblivious to him.

"Good afternoon, Chansey," he stated.

"Dana, dana… hooo!" Her eyes went wide and she stopped dancing. "Cha?"

"I came here to speak to Erika," Oak told her. "I've called ahead."

Looking thoughtful, the Chansey turned and went inside. He followed inside the Gym, which seemed to be eternally in spring. Small trees were everywhere, along with soft light green grass and colorful wildflowers. Ahead of him, the Chansey chattered at some of the Gym Trainers. "Cha cha cha ni cha!"

One of them, an older teen, gave him a suspicious look. "And what are you doing in here?"

A preteen girl widened her eyes, tugging at her elder's arm. "Hey, it's Professor Oak! It's okay for him to be here, right? And it is the right hours."

"That's right," Oak said with a nod. "So why's the Chansey in front of the door?"

"She's our new bouncer," the older teen said. "She makes sure there's no peeping toms around. We'd have the Grass Pokemon out doing that, but they tend to nap when left alone out in the sun."

"Actually, some of them are more energetic in the sun." He tapped his side, reminding himself to stay on subject. "I came to talk to Erika. Is she around?"

The younger girl nodded. "Yeah, she's up on the roof. She said you can go meet her up there; the entrance is at the end of those stairs." Behind some particularly tall trees, there seemed to be a hidden staircase.

On the roof? Oak wondered. "All right. Thank you."

"Chana!" the Chansey cheered, then hopped back to her duties outside.

As Oak walked up the wooden stairs, he considered how things were. So Erika was making her open hours erratic and had a Chansey as a door guard. The Gyms were supposed to be a challenge, but not based on a Trainer's gender. True, there had been a time when women had not even been allowed to be Pokemon Trainers. But there was no reason anymore for the large anti-male bias. There wasn't any anti-female Gym, after all.

There was a door in the ceiling with a small set of steps heading out. Oak opened it up and walked out onto the roof. Thankfully, it wasn't a steep grade and he could manage unassisted. That was countered by the scent of Glooms, though. He wrinkled his nose at first, but managed to restrain his distaste by the time he located Erika.

She was sitting on the roof by one Gloom; a second was walking around the roof's edge. Oak shut the trap door and walked over to the Leader. "Good afternoon, Erika!"

Looking his way, she smiled and waved. "Good afternoon, Professor. I hope you didn't have much trouble getting up here."

"The main obstacle was the dancing Chansey in front of the door," he told her. "But she did let me in once I got her attention."

"Ah." Erika laughed lightly. "She is excited to have the job, I believe."

"Seems that way. What are you doing up here?"

She gestured to the two Glooms. "I hope to have these two evolved into Bellossoms before winter comes. That requires them to be in the sun, and to be happy with me. So I am accompanying them, looking over the autumn trees. And you needed to ask me about them, correct?"

"Correct," he replied. Then he brought out his clipboard, glad he had put the questions there instead of a computer. Of course, he hadn't expected this interview to be on the roof. "One issue is the spotting patterns of the petals. Is it consistent, or varying among individuals, or something else?"

"It varies by gender," she said, patting the pink-purple petals of the one beside her. "This male has more white spots, of a smaller size. The female have fewer but larger spots. That's the main method of telling the difference at this stage, as they look nearly identical."

Ah, that makes sense." He made a few notes, then came over to her side. "I've also had some conflict in moves it can learn. Petal Dance, Teeter Dance, Tickle, and a few others." He handed her the clipboard.

"I see. Those three can be learned by all stages. Tickle's a breed move, Petal Dance if you train it long enough… Teeter Dance takes a lot of effort, but it can be done… oh, no I've never had a Gloom learn that move. Might want to test it out…" she made a note, but fumbled with the pen and dropped it. "Oh, sorry."

"That's fine," Oak said, moving down the roof after the pen. It fell into the gutter, where it should have been easy to pluck out.

Then there was a rustle that distracted him. The female Gloom was face to face with him, with a trail of sticky drool on its chin. "Phe?"

Good lord, that stench… for a moment, it was all that Oak could think of. It attacked his senses with such strength that he passed out.

Several minutes later, he woke up on the lawn of the Grass Gym. There was a woman beside him. "Lie still," she said in a gentle voice. "I'm so sorry, Professor. The Gloom didn't mean to startle you."

"Huh, what?" Oak asked. His head hurt terribly and there was an awful sickeningly sweet smell that seemed to fill his head. "What happened… who're you?"

"Oh dear," Erika said, looking up to her bouncer Chansey. "I think falling off the roof gave him a concussion."

"Se cha," the Chansey said in a sad tone. "Tah!" Then she snatched the white egg that was in her pouch, shook it up, cracked the top a bit, then helped Oak to drink the contents. "Chansa."

"Go on and drink it, it should help you." She got up at the sound of sirens. "Looks like the ambulance is here."

After finishing the egg, oak felt a little better. The scent wasn't overcoming him anymore. "What smells so horrid? It's gotten into my head."

"Many people do say a Gloom's scent is horrid," Erika said, in a slightly sad tone. "I don't agree, though. I think they smell so invigorating."

Invigorating in the sense that you couldn't be sleepy around that stench, Oak thought.

...

Gloom Emerald entry: A horribly noxious honey drools from its mouth. One whiff of the honey can result in memory loss. Some fans are said to enjoy the overwhelming stench, however.

Chansey Platinum entry: A kindly Pokemon that lays highly nutritious eggs and shares them with injured Pokemon or people.

Written for the start of Autumn, 2010. And Gloom would be the 100th first gen Pokemon that I've covered here!