How could she?
Killian Jones thought he knew pain. Thought he understood all of its corners and edges. He'd spent decades saturated in it. Thought it had no more surprises to offer him.
He was wrong.
Becoming a Dark One was agony; both of body and spirit.
How could she?
Becoming a Dark One caused an incomparable agony of the heart because the one he loved above and beyond all else, did so over all of his desperate begging not to become the thing he hated.
How could she?
Becoming a Dark One was pain, unparalleled.
How could she?
The transfer from the idyllic field of flowers to the vault of the Dark One had been accompanied by the heart rending sobs of his love. They echoed around the rock walls; the only noise to be heard there in the shadows.
Oh, yes. I was dying and she loves me. She was selfish. That's why.
The sound of her breaking heart was amplified by his guilt at leaving her, when he had promised he would not. So distracted by the echo of his love's cries was he, that he actually forgot for a moment to be disoriented at where he had appeared.
She couldn't let me go.
The oily black ribbons locked on to his feet and wended their way up to engulf him. Helpless in the maelstrom, the Darkness dug deep into his mind, searching for all the shadows and the memories of dark acts in which it could thrive. As it made a home for itself in his psyche, it tore into his body, cutting away his human flesh and remaking it anew. He emerged with his new form, enmeshed with the ages old evil that he abhorred.
He could smell the forest. There was no bird song, no animal stirred, no buzzing insects, not even a breeze to whisper in the leaves. It was as though the world was holding its breath, because a new Dark One was being forged and it didn't do to attract the attention of Darkness personified.
In the moments it took for his vision to focus; before he fully understood that there was no need for a Dark One to feel fear, he panicked. His thoughts were a roiling sea. There was no rest, no calm centre, no place to rally his defences and fight the Darkness already embedded deep inside. A war was fought within the space between heartbeats. A war that he was sure he would lose before Emma had actually tethered him to Excalibur. He was in the dark, in the shadows, then his sight cleared and before him stood his salvation.
Emma, now clothed in black, all the gold leeched from her hair, her lips a crimson streak and her creamy skin turned alabaster. There she was, waiting for him and in her hands the broken blade. Her pale fingers were clasped around the blunted tip as she extended the handle to him. Offering to him as much freedom as a Dark One can own.
He looked from the blade to his love's eyes which were bright with freely falling tears.
"It worked! It worked!" Her voice trembled, as did the sword he had not yet taken from her. "Killian, I . . .I love . . . ," The words caught in her throat. There he was. Alive. A Dark One, but alive. She shook her head as if to shake the words loose. "Please don't hate me. Please, please don't hate me."
Killian's visage appeared carved from stone, but his expression was neutral.
Emma pushed the sword towards him.
"Please take it. It's yours. I know you said you wouldn't be able to resist the Darkness but you're wrong, You can, I know you can," Emma said, voice trembling not with fear, but with conviction.
That got his attention.
There was only a measure of 6 inches between Killian's hand and the sword, but he moved so slowly that it seemed to take millennia before it passed into his possession. When the metal touched his skin the Darkness began to sing, crooning to him of betrayal and revenge and a rage that burned so bright that not even decades could diminish its flame.
"You think so, Swan? Or are you trying to justify your betrayal?"
There was so much noise in his head. So much anger at what his love had done.
"I BEGGED you! Begged you to let me go. To not do this," he gestured to himself, "to me. How could you?"
For a heartbeat, Emma foundered, then her eyes locked onto his and what she found there galvanised her. She stepped forward so her face was inches from his.
"Six weeks." Emma said and then waited for him to catch on, but his wrinkled brow indicated he hadn't got it at all. "Six weeks, Killian. I watched you die only six weeks ago. I know you came back, I know it tuned out not to be real, but it was real for me. You DIED! You died and I had to watch and I couldn't stop it, I couldn't reach you, I couldn't hold you . . ." She paused, her chest heaving with the effort to get the words out. "I already know what it's like to lose you and I couldn't. . . I can't. . . " She took a deep breath before continuing. "Then there you were again, dying right in front of me, only this time I could do something. I could save you."
He hadn't thought of that. Killian blinked and, in the face of the raw and desperate emotions that a fully vulnerable Emma was offering, the anger in him began to sag around the edges. She reached a hand to palm his cheek.
"I love you, Killian. I couldn't lose you. I know this isn't what you wanted." His eyes flashed, dangerously, but Emma would not be put off. "But I know, with everything I am, that you can fight the Darkness. Because you already have."
"No, Swan . . . " Killian began to protest, but much of the anger had drained from his tone.
"YES, Killian. Look at everything you've done to turn your life around. You did that. You made the choice, good choices, to move out of the darkness and become a hero. That takes a huge amount of inner strength. Killian Jones, you are the strongest man I have ever met." She kissed him then. A quick press of lips before she drew back to see if her words were having any impact.
"Emma, this is different. This Darkness is . . . ," He didn't get to finish as Emma put a finger over his lips to shush him.
"This Darkness is different, yes, but you know how to fight it and you won't be doing it alone. You have me and I won't ever leave you," Emma said, smiling through her tears. "We're a team, now and always." Not giving him another chance to protest, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him with all the conviction she held in her heart. It was only after they drew back to rest their foreheads against each other that Killian heard sounds of movement around him. He jerked his head away to look around when he heard the sound of a throat clearing.
"Just so you know, you don't just have, Emma, to help you fight this battle," David said, as he stepped into the clearing.
"That's right. You're family," Snow said and she walked over and first kissed her daughter's cheek and then Killian's. "We asked Merlin to send us here, so we could be here for you. Henry wanted to come, too, but Merlin could only muster the strength to send two."
"We're all here for you, Hook," David assured him. "But, yeah, I'm not kissing you," He finished with a smirk.
Killian tried to swallow the lump that had popped up in his throat. The Darkness tried to seduce him, to cut through the warm aura of love and strength of belief that was being wrapped around him by the woman he loved and the family that held him close. The song of the Darkness was hollow compared to the faith Emma had shown him by offering him his tether without compulsion or reluctance. Yes, they were Dark Ones, but the path they walked together could only lead to the Light.
A/N: This is an idea that wouldn't go away. I always thought that Emma would have transferred herself to the vault immediately and been waiting for Killian with the sword in her hands. I also think it was wrong to straight out accuse Emma of selfishness when saving Killian, because so many ignored her mental state at seeing Killian die in front her again so soon after seeing him die in the Author's AU. She's one poor soul who'd been through hell and then some . . .I wanted to give her a break