The tension in the air is palpable. Will, Christina, Tobias, and I are standing in my living room staring at one another. They barged in this morning demanding answers for my actions last night, and I really can't blame them. They took me in when I was at my absolute lowest point. I just don't want Tobias to have to share any of his secrets if he's not unequivocally ready to do so. I don't want to hurt him anymore than I already have.
"Fine. Let's hear it, Four," Christina irritably says.
"Everyone sit down, please," I say, trying to ease the tension a little. "Does anyone want some coffee? The pot's still hot." Everyone says no, and we sit around my living room waiting for Tobias to speak.
"The first thing you need to know is I didn't mean to hurt Tris last night. I would rather cut my own heart out than ever hurt her," he says. Shock rockets through my body. He's speaking to Will and Christina as Tobias, not Four. Even they notice the clear difference, and their mouths fall open before they gather their wits and close them. "What I'm about to say doesn't leave this room, you got it?" They nod their heads in unison.
"Four, what are you doing?" I nervously ask, interrupting. I can't believe this. He really plans to go through with this.
"Tris, they deserve to know the entire truth," he says to me. I shake my head at him.
"No. You don't have to do this. They don't need to know anything other than I'm fine, you're fine, and we both did and said some stupid things yesterday."
"Tris," he says moving closer to me on the couch. He pulls me toward him and wraps his arms around me, his hands caressing my hair. I can't believe he's acting this way in front of other people. He's acting like he does when we're alone. He pulls back and looks at me. "We promised to be honest. I want to be honest."
"Honest with each other, Four," I say. "Not our friends." Will and Christina are sitting there staring at us in complete awe. I realize they're finally seeing the man I fell in love with.
"Tris, I want to do this," he says. "I need to do this. They're my friends, too. I trust them."
"Tell me you aren't doing this for me. You're talking about sharing your most personal moments. If you're going to do this it has to be for you, not me," I say, practically begging.
"I want to," he says, kissing me lightly on the mouth. He pulls away quickly then takes a couple deep breaths and reaches for my hand. I lace our fingers together and place my other hand over our clasped hands. He looks at Will and Christina who are sitting side-by-side on the loveseat, expectation plain on their faces.
"Do you two know how many transfers from Abnegation there have been over the years?" They both shake their heads at him, confusion crossing their faces at the direction the conversation has turned. "Less than 10 in our entire history, and exactly two in the past 10 years. Obviously, Tris here is one of them, and ... I'm the other one." Their eyes widen at his admission, and he tenses up beside me. I know he's about to share his story so I squeeze his hand showing him my support. He looks down into my eyes and gives me a slight smile. This is harder on him than he's letting show.
"My name is Tobias Eaton. I'm sure you've heard that name before and read about me in the reports published by Erudite. I'm afraid to say every one of the reports about me is 100% truth. My father is the leader of Abnegation, Marcus Eaton. I transferred from Abnegation to get away from his abuse.
"When I was 9-years-old, my mother got pregnant. I was excited and anxious all at the same time. I couldn't wait to have a little brother or sister but I knew adding another member to our family only meant one more person for Marcus to abuse." He stops for a moment and clears his throat. I get up and go to the kitchen and grab him a bottle of water out of the fridge and bring it to him. He smiles at me and drinks the entire bottle down in no time at all. He sets the empty bottle on the end table next to him then continues with his story.
"Later, my mother died during childbirth, and my baby sister didn't make it either," he says, an edge to his voice. I know its reason, but they don't and confusion once again crosses both their faces. Christina starts to ask a question but Tobias stops her. "Let me get this out, please, Christina, or I might not be able to finish then Tris and I will answer any questions you have." Will and Christina nod in agreement. "From that day forward until my Choosing Ceremony, Marcus beat me or locked me in the closet almost on a daily basis. I couldn't wait to get as far away from him as possible. I hoped the aptitude test would tell me another faction is where I belonged, but it didn't. It told me what I had always known, I was born for Abnegation." This visibly shocks our friends, the great Four thinking he belongs in Abnegation. "It was a long, sleepless night deciding to choose Dauntless. I ruled out the other factions quite easily but part of me was having a hard time letting go of Abnegation's simple life. I swear if it weren't for my father, I would be wearing gray robes right now," he says looking down into my eyes. I smile up at him. He knows I could have chosen Abnegation just as easily.
"You wanted to know about last night," he says, then just sits there.
"There was something Four didn't share with me," I say, trying to encourage him to continue. "Something I found out through the flower deliveries." Christina sits forward a little at the mention of the flowers. She knows this is where the trouble started.
"About a year after I joined Dauntless I got a coded message to meet someone. I honestly thought it was from Marcus, and I went because I was curious as to why he would want to see me after I defected from Abnegation but it wasn't him. It was ... I still can't believe it ... it was my mother." Will and Christina both gasp. "She hadn't died like my father told me. She chose to leave my father and Abnegation and become factionless. The baby I told you about was the result of an affair. The baby didn't die either. Evelyn gave her up for adoption and doesn't know what happened to her. Apparently, it's a rule. You aren't allowed to know anything about your child once you give it up. I was shocked to see her again, and it wasn't a happy reunion. I still can't get over the fact she left me with Marcus. I don't think I will ever be able to forgive her for abandoning me, and that's what I told her.
"Yesterday, Tris signed for a delivery of flowers from Evelyn and read the card. I made the mistake of not telling her about the other deliveries and lying to her about what the first card said. I was stupid," he says gliding his hand down my face, regret in his eyes. "Even though she never came out and said it, I think she thought I was seeing someone else." I nod my head acknowledging that's exactly what I thought. "I wasn't happy with her for opening the card but I understand now why she did it. I lied to her and made her not trust me. I took Tris to meet Evelyn last night and I ... we got a few more surprises."
"Four has a little brother named Tyler," I say continuing for him. "He's almost two years old and so cute. I imagine he looks exactly like Four did at that age except with lighter eyes."
"Your eyes," Tobias whispers. I can't help but smile at him. He noticed that too.
"His mother is also expecting another child, and she wants Four to adopt her." Will and Christina are both sitting mouths agape, staring at us. They no longer try to hide their shock. "Christina, do you remember the factionless woman at the clinic who looked familiar to me?" She slowly nods her head at me. "That was Evelyn."
"Damn," Christina says, unable to contain herself anymore. "Sorry. Continue."
"That's basically everything. We both got upset for different reason. Words were exchanged. I stupidly left instead of staying and trying to work things out. I'll never walk out on you ever again," I quietly say to Tobias. "I love you."
"I love you, too," he says to me. Then he looks at Will and Christina. "There are a couple of things I need from you two. Don't ever call me by my given name. I'm Four now, never Tobias. Also no one else needs to know I'm from Abnegation. If they were to hear that information, it's not hard to figure out who I am and who I'm related to."
"Okay, Four," they say in unison. It's so cute how they do everything together.
"Do you have any questions?" Tobias hesitantly asks. I know he doesn't like talking about himself. It must be the Abnegation in him.
"How did you get the name Four?" Will asks. "I know it's the number of fears you had during initiation but who came up with it?" Tobias smiles then sighs.
"Amar gave me the name Four so I would fit in at Dauntless better," he says. "He was tough on me, but I considered him a friend. He made sure I learned how to hide my divergence, and I believe it cost him his life. He toyed with the idea of calling me either Blade or Killer." He laughs at the memory. "I'm glad he settled on Four instead."
"I didn't know that, Killer," I say, laughing. I may have found a new nickname for him. He just rolls his eyes at me. "Yeah! I'm glad he chose Four also. It sounds ... normal, as normal as a number can." He shakes his head at me but there's a comfortable smile on his lips.
"What are you going to do about the baby?" Christina asks, eying me. Tobias and I just look at each other, fear on my face and expectation on his.
"We haven't decided yet," he says.
"We have to think about it some more," I add. "It's a big decision, having a baby. We're not sure we're ready for that, at least I'm not." Will and Christina both burst out laughing, and Tobias and I look at each other curiously.
"What's so funny?" I slowly ask, unable to hide my agitation. Christina's having a hard time catching her breath because she's laughing so hard.
"Yeah, having a baby is a big decision but sometimes the decision is made for you," she says. Oh, God. She's pregnant and here I am discussing not really wanting to have a child now because I'm not ready. She didn't have a choice, not really. I just stare at her. "Tell me what you would do if you went to the infirmary right now and Dr. Parrish told you you're pregnant. Tris, Four. Don't think, just answer."
"I'd have the baby," I say, surprising myself a little. Tobias can't say anything. He seems a little tongue-tied at the moment.
"There's your answer, Tris. Give that baby a home. You're the most selfless person I know. You'll be a wonderful mother."
"But I have so many doubts," I say. "I just don't think now is the right time."
"I can answer that for you," Will says. "It's never the right time to have a baby, Tris, and if you wait until the time is right, you'll never have one." Seriously, did Tobias sneak into their bedroom last night and tell them what to say to me about adopting this little girl.
"I can't fight all three of you," I say, mostly to myself.
"Does that mean you've reconsidered?" Tobias asks.
"No, not really, but I promised I would listen to your side fully, and I will take what Will and Christina have said into account."
"Did you two know each other in Abnegation?" Will asks, abruptly changing the subject.
"As amazing as it seems, no, we didn't, and we grew up just down the street from one another," I say. "We both had to leave our faction to find each other." We smile brightly looking into each other's eyes.
"So you two are okay now?" Christina says. "No more knocking on my door in tears. You know I should be the one who's having emotional outbursts people. I'm the pregnant one. And speaking of that, William, if you don't get me some food pretty soon, I'm going to pass out." I laugh at that and spring up off the couch and give her a big hug.
"Thank you for being there for me last night," I whisper in her ear. "You don't know how much you mean to me."
"Are you really alright?" she asks.
"Yes, for the most part." I pull back from her, and she stands up. We continue our conversation in hushed tones. "It's going to take a bit of time to get things back to how they were but we're actually in a better place now because of what happened last night. We promised no more secrets and no more running away from our problems. We'll be fine."
"You're right, Tris. He is totally different with you, and he is totally in love with you. I saw that with my own two eyes this morning. I'm so happy for you, and I'm no longer concerned he will hurt you, if you know what I mean." I forgot she thought of him as abusive.
"You understand why I couldn't say anything about his past when you shared those fears with me, right? I knew he would never physically hurt me after being hurt himself by his father. Now go and get breakfast before you starve." She hugs me again and then hugs Tobias, startling him. Will hugs me and shakes Tobias' hand then they leave to go to the cafeteria. Tobias pulls me into his arms and kisses me passionately then reluctantly lets me go.
"I have to take a shower and get ready for work. I think we can make it on time. Why don't you make breakfast," he says heading towards the stairs. He lets out a laugh then bends down and picks up my bra. "Here. You might want this." He throws it at me with amazing accuracy, and I just shake my head at him and laugh. That's the second time we've been interrupted by Christina. Instead of making breakfast, I take a couple of chocolate chip muffins out of a sack in the cupboard and take them upstairs so we can eat while getting ready for work.
Tobias comes into the bedroom with nothing but a towel slung low around his lean hips, and desire spears straight through me. He's standing in front of his closet rooting around for something to wear when I go up behind him and gently slide his towel off, letting it fall to the floor. He looks down over his shoulder at me, and I just smile coyly up at him.
"You dropped your towel," I innocently say. I take a step closer and press myself against his strong, naked back and slide my delicate hands up and down his hard, hairless chest, feeling every defined muscle beneath my roaming fingertips. I hear his breath increase, and he gasps as I move my right hand down and wrap it around his stirring manhood. I gently glide my snug fist up and down his length, feeling him harden and grow. It's the most amazing thing I've ever felt. I move my other hand up and play with his rigid little nipple, rolling it between my fingertips while I kiss his tattoo. He lets out a long guttural moan and his head falls backward.
"What are you doing, Tris?" he asks roughly.
"I'm making us late for work," I say between kisses. I release him and he turns quickly, lifting me by the waist until we are the same height. I wrap my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist as his hungry mouth lands on mine. We kiss each other greedily. He hurries across the room and lies me down on the bed then covers me with his naked body, not once breaking our kiss. He slowly slides his hand down my body and moves it up under my sweater and covers my bare aching breast with his hand. We finally break apart gasping for air. He leans back, and I whip my sweater off over my head and toss it aside. He lightly presses his lips to mine then kisses his way down to my left breast, licking around the taut bud before taking it in his mouth. I lie there enjoying the feel of his hot, wet mouth on me. I run my fingers through his damp curls as he teases me with his talented tongue, circling, lapping, sucking, then biting. I wrap my legs around him again and pull his head closer to my chest. My breath is coming hard and fast as he continues the sweet torment. I hear him chuckle against my breast causing a ripple of desire to jolt straight between my thighs. He switches breasts and repeats the worship until I pull him up, and his mouth lands on mine again. He breaks away after a moment and leans back and together we get my yoga pants and boy shorts off.
He once again covers my body with his and looks down at me with lust-filled eyes. He moves his hand between us and methodically starts to circles my nubbin with his thumb, never taking his eyes off mine. He watches as my eyes glaze over with lust at the constant stimulation. My breath is coming in agonized gasps as he moves me closer to the edge. He gently inserts his middle finger into me, bending it slightly, and sinks it deep within me. He immediately pulls it out then joins another finger with it and sinks back into me. He then sets a steady pace with his fingers, never letting his thumb stop moving over my hard, aching nubbin. I moan between gasps and start rocking my hips in time with his movements. His eyes are penetrating me to my very depths.
"Keep looking at me, Tris," he roughly says. "I want you to look at me when you come." Almost on command, at the word, I plummet over the edge and shudder uncontrollably around his probing fingers but don't take my eyes off of his. He keeps up the movements with his hand until I can't take anymore. I grab him roughly and pull his mouth to mine, and I let my tongue mate with his. He removes his hand and in one fluid movement wraps his arms tightly around me and rolls us so I'm on top of him. I break the steamy kiss and look inquisitively into his eyes.
"Just like on the couch," is all he says. Just like on the couch, I think. Okay. I let my legs fall to either side of his hips and sit up. He lets his eyes and hands roam up and down my small body. I relax and lift myself with my legs. I reach down and take his hard length in my hand and place him at my entrance then I ease myself down onto him inch by hard inch until he's fully embedded within me. I don't move for a full minute, panting at the fullness, getting used to the feeling. I swear he's deeper than he ever has been before. I finally raise myself with my legs until he almost slips out then let gravity slide me back down, and do it again watching Tobias' face the entire time. The look of pure pleasure tells me what I'm doing is right. I lean forward until my hands are on either side of his head and find I'm more comfortable this way. I set a nice rhythm for the both of us and start to feel the sweet pressure build again. I close my eyes and quicken the pace, pushing myself down harder and faster on his hard length as he thrusts up to meet my hips. He leans up, kisses my breast, and draws my hard, aching nipple into his mouth. A mini explosion courses through me as he works on the hard bud with his hot, wet mouth, circling and biting repeatedly.
Soon he sits us both up so we're face to face, and I stop momentarily, startled by his sudden movement. I wrap my arms around his neck, pull him close to me, and he places his hands on my hips. I bring his mouth to mine and leisurely kiss him as he helps raise and lower me on his hard, pulsating manhood. We once again pick up the pace as he delves deeper still into me with each frenzied thrust. We move closer to the edge of some unknown cliff; him thrusting into me incredibly deep as I crash down on him allowing him entrance into my very soul.
Our mouths never part as a wave of pleasure crashes over me just as I feel Tobias shudder and empty himself into me. We both ride the surge of ecstasy that's washing through us until we're sapped of all strength. He falls backward, and I follow him down, collapsing on top of him, lying there panting. Once my breathing returns to normal I slide myself up, and he slips out of me. I kiss his lips then roll off of him and lie down beside him. I rest my head in the crook of his arm, and we don't say anything for a long while.
"I need another shower," he says, finally breaking the comfortable silence.
"I do too," I say. Then an idea hits me. "Let's take one together, Tobias." That's something we've never done before. He groans at the suggestion and shakes his head.
"I'm not sure that's a good idea, Tris. We've really got to get to work. If we take a shower together ... no, it's too tempting." I move my head to look into his eyes. "I think it would just lead to more of this, and we don't have time now. Maybe we can take a shower tonight."
"Promise?" I ask, turning to lightly run my fingertips over his rock hard abs. They contract under my fingers and desire surges through me once again.
"Yes," he says.
"Until tonight then," I say as I roll back on top of him and give him a long, slow kiss.