Warm morning light came in through the large windows, the shadows of the boys sleeping on the floor or the couches projected on to the brightly painted walls around them. There was no sound except for the occasional deep breath from one of the boys as they shifted in their sleep or rolled over to get more comfortable. The higher the sun rose, the louder the outside world seemed to be become, the sound of cars and a police siren waking Evan from his deep slumber.
He thought for a moment that he had woken up in his own bed and the nightmare was behind him until he sat up and took in the room around him. He didn't understand how he could have fall asleep in a dream and not wake up in reality.
Unless...this was real.
Evan shook his head as he laid back down, pulling the blanket over himself as he curled into a ball on the soft red couch. He remembered what Jonathan had said how he was still their Evan but he didn't know who that Evan was. He knew who he was to his friends as he knew them, voices over Skype with the occasional visit. Maybe he was supposed to act how he was when playing those games with his friends; aggressive, and loud. He couldn't do that to anyone real though. He cared to much to find joy in hurting them like in video games. This world and his own have consequences for such actions.
As his mind drifted through his fuzzy memories of what had happened since he woke up in that puddle of blood, he realised that Jonathan and the others didn't understand what death was. They had no concept of it because whatever fatal wounds they had would heal and they would come back. A Glitch must be the only form of death in this world.
Evan felt disturbed, trying to think of something else but the idea of death only existing in the form of becoming a monster kept coming back to mind. They thought he was becoming one, thought he was dying, because he couldn't remember what they wanted him to remember after hitting that pavement.
He rolled over, pressing his hand against the back of his head, feeling no wound, no scar, nothing but his head as it always was. He stared at the large windows, watching the city wake up around their quiet apartment building. The noise of the city got louder, almost uncomfortably loud to Evan but he did his best to block it out. Instead of listening to the harsh noise of the city, he listened to his friend's breath deeply, safe in their slumber. He had always wished to have a moment like this, to know that they were all there with him, happy and alive, not far away and only visible through a computer screen.
Feeling so comforted, even with the though of this being a terrifying nightmarish wasteland, Evan found himself falling asleep again, snuggling into the warm blanket that was over him.
"Do you believe him?"
"Of course I do."
"Loss of memory has never been a part of the Come Back before."
"He hit his head. Hard. Of course his head is going to be fuzzy."
"You've seen it, Brock. You've seen the Glitches get smarter. They mess with our heads now. They fuck with us like we're helpless prey. What if that's what is happening to Evan?"
"Shut up! Evan is Evan. It scares me too, Craig but I believe him. Don't bring it up again. Please. It's just easier to not think about that."
Evan listened to the voices of his friend's that had woken him. He wished he hadn't heard them. His hands curled into fists around his blanket, his eyes closed tightly as he tried to block out the harsh voices and instead now tried to listen to the sounds of the city instead but it was no use.
"What if I'm right, Brock?"
"We all become Glitches eventually, Craig. When Evan becomes one, or when you or anyone else becomes a Glitch, we'll deal with it. Right now, Evan is Evan and you are you. That's all that matters."
A gentle hand landed on Evan's shoulder, shaking him in a soft attempt to wake him. He opened his eyes, looking up at Brock who smiled at him.
"M-Morning…" Evan stammered, pretending to yawn. He didn't want them to know he had been listening.
"More like afternoon." Craig sighed, nudging Tyler awake with his foot. Tyler groaned angrily, grabbing Craig's ankles and pulled his feet out out from under him, sending him crashing to the hardwood floor. Around them, the others swore at Craig, his fall having woken them from their deep sleep. After getting over the pain of waking up suddenly, they decided they didn't want to spend the day inside.
Those who had masks pulled them over their faces, their animal faces blank unlike the smiles under them.
"It makes us feel more like a family. We're all the same but unique." Marcel had explained when Evan asked why they wore them, his voice muffled under his own monkey mask. As they headed towards the door, Tyler stopped Evan, holding something out to him.
"You forgot it." Tyler handed Evan his red and white leather jacket, seeing his eyes widen at the sight of it. Along with the mask, he had never believed that it to be real or that he could actually wear such a thing.
"T-Thank you…" Evan said as he pulled the jacket on. Tyler gave him a smile as he walked past him into the hallway. Evan stared down at the jacket and decided that maybe if this was real, it might not be so bad after all.
"Don't be such a little bitch and jump!"
The wind whipped around Evan, his cheeks feeling numb. They stood on the roof of a parking garage, their sports cars still hot from their drive that almost made Evan throw up on the fine leather of Tyler's interior. Now they were gathered in a group by the ledge of the roof, looking at the building that was across the alley way from them. It was Daithi's idea to have a contest to see who could make it across, his taller legs giving him a better advantage.
"You got it, Lui but if you don't, you'll have to scrape yourself off the pavement." Tyler joked. Lui took a deep breath, backing up to the cars and sprinted towards the edge, jumping with as much force as he had in his small body. Evan looked away, not wanting to see the result. He heard a crack and a small cry but the others cheered around them. Lui had missed the ledge with his feet but managed to grab onto the edge, his face hitting the hard cement. Daithi pulled him up, using his sleeve to wipe the blood off his face.
"W-Who is next?" Lui laughed, his voice sounding shaky with pain.
"I'll go." Jonathan said when no one else said anything. "What do we get if we make it across?"
"Just jump!" Daithi laughed.
"He's gonna fall like a rock." Marcel said quietly to Evan who felt sick with fear for his friends, more than he did in the car.
Just as Lui had, Jonathan backed up, his hands checking the straps of his mask to make sure they were tight enough. He glanced at Evan who had gone visibly pale and gave him a wink. He started to sprint, his legs carrying him closer to the edge where he jumped, his arms propelling through the air to make it to the next ledge. Evan turned away, resisting the urge to put his hands over his ears as he closed his eyes tightly. But once more, he heard his friends cheer when Jonathan made it across, having to roll once he hit the cement.
"Come on, Ev! You're turn!" Jonathan called once he was on his feet. Evan shook his head, backing away from the group.
"W-Why don't you make Craig or Brock go next? I don't-"
"Oh come on, Ev!" Tyler laughed, giving him a playful shove towards the edge that sent a jolt of panic through him. "Or are you suddenly scared of heights because of what happened last night?" He taunted, a smirk on his face. Evan glared at him, his hands curling into fists. He didn't want to let Tyler win this challenge but he knew he couldn't make that jump. He had never done something like that in his life, at least not the life that he remembered that they didn't. Maybe in this world he had before but all he could think was how he couldn't do it now.
"Go on, Evan." Craig said, his eyes staring intently at Evan's as if waiting for them to glitch. Evan clenched his jaw as he backed up to the cars, pressing his palms against the warm black matte metal of the sports car. He had to jump, had to prove to them that he was the Evan that they expected him to be. Or else he would be dealt with like Brock said. He took a deep breath, telling himself that it couldn't be that far of a jump and that he could make it easily.
He pushed himself away from the car, sprinting as hard as he could. His lungs heaved for air, the fear tightening his chest as he pumped his arms, his eyes on the ledge across from him where Jonathan stood. Then he was in the air, having propelled himself off the edge. It felt like time slowed, the ledge looking farther and farther away with every painful second that passed. His arms flailed, reached desperately for the ledge. He breathed heavily through his owl mask, the smell of rubber strong to his senses.
As he seemed to fly through the air, the thought occurred to him that if this was a dream, he could will himself to have great wings like an owl that would save him and take him far away from this constant near death experience. He spread his arms wide like they were wings, the sun glinting off the red and white leather of his jacket.
"Evan!" His foot missed the ledge, and he began to plummet towards the hard pavement several floors below. Flailing his arms out he grabbed onto the ledge just in time, the force of his jump making him hit his chin hard on the pavement. He hung from the ledge, pain shooting through him that made his muscles tense. He struggled to hold onto the ledge, struggling to pull himself over it. He glanced back over his shoulder at the others, his eyes begging them to help. He looked up at Daithi, Lui and Jonathan who also stood and watched him, waiting for him to pull himself up.
"H-Help me!" Evan cried, fighting the urge to look down. "I'm gonna fall! Please!"
"There isn't anything to fear, Ev!" Craig called out. his voice carrying over the alley.
Hands were suddenly on his wrists, pulling him up and over the ledge. Evan looked up at Jonathan with a look of gratitude, his body shaking with fear and adrenaline. He sat on the cement, looking across at the others who hadn't seemed to care at all when he had almost fallen to his death. He knew that was only right though that they didn't care, death doesn't exist in this world.
"It's okay, Ev. You're fine." Jonathan looked down at him, his eyes soft under his blood splattered mask. "Craig is right. You don't have anything to fear."
The bright yellow, pink and blue neon lights buzzed, a constant sound like the police sirens in the distance. The group of boys sat on the hoods of their sports cars or leaned against the sides, burgers and milkshakes in their hands. They were outside a diner, the neon lights bright in the dim evening light.
Evan stared down at his milkshake, still feeling too sick from the fear of earlier to want to eat. He sat on the hood of Tyler's sports car, slowly stirring his strawberry shake with his straw. The others were talking among themselves, joking around and stealing fries from each other. Their loud voices rang in Evan's ears, his grip tightening on his cup.
"You still owe me from the last bet! Give that back!"
"What bet?"
"The one from the maze! I axed you down first so you fucking owe me, Jonathan!"
"No you got Lui first! Come on, Daithi! Fuck off!"
"No I got you! Right, Lui?"
"He's right, Jon."
"Fuck you! I don't owe you shit!"
"Are you feeling okay?" Evan's head snapped up to look at Brock who smiled at him reassuringly as he sat down beside him. "You seem quiet."
"Just a little...sick is all." Evan said, looking back down at his red straw. He tried to block out the voices of his friends that were slowly getting louder the more they continued on the topic of owing each other. "Is it okay to feel that way after a Come Back?" He asked, after a few moments. He was still unsure of what was the right thing to say around them. They all seemed like they could snap at any moment at something that rubbed them the wrong way. They scared Evan despite how much he loved them. This dream could be a perfect world if it wasn't so bloody.
"It's okay...At least I think so though none of us have ever felt sick after a Come Back before. Maybe because you hit your head, it snapped something in you. You lost some memories that had made you who you were and now they are gone and you are kinda like someone else." Brock suggested. "You are reacting to things differently."
"That sounds complicated." Evan laughed but he felt uneasy. If there was anyone that he thought he could tell the truth to, it's be Brock or Jonathan but fear held his tongue.
"Guys calm down! You are fighting over fries!"
"Tyler, this fool owes me more than just meal! All those bets where I've wounded him to the point of a Come Back and he owes me!"
"Daithi chill the fuck out. Honestly."
"Don't tell me to chill! I want my money! You would too!"
"Not when we're trying to relax!"
"Just tell Jon to give me what he owes me! He owes Ev too!"
"Leave Evan out of this!"
"Why is everyone so aggressive?" Evan asked, moving closer to Brock and away from the tension coming from the others. Brock glanced at them, thinking for a moment he was just talking about what was happening till he saw the sad expression on Evan's face and realized that he meant all the time.
"Maybe because...We know we can hurt each other and we'll Come Back. We can't lose each other. We have no one else. People we knew before have Glitched. One day we will too but for now, we have each other as our family. And family members fight sometimes." Brock smiled.
A sudden loud bang echoed in Evan's ears, making him jump. His shake slipped from his hand as he stood slowly and shaking. It fell to the pavement, the styrofoam cup splitting as it hit the sun warmed pavement and spilled.
Evan could only stare, his friends backing away from Daithi and the still smoking gun in his hand. His wide eyes followed Daithi's angry stare to Jonathan who's mask was a bit crooked, his hands shaking as they slowly reached for his chest. A deep red stain began to blossom on his blue hoodie, blood dripping to the pavement and though the holes of his mask as he began to cough it up.
Jonathan fell to his knees, the only sound echoing through the parking lot was his wet, bloody coughs and the buzz of neon lights. Evan took a step forward, feeling Brock reach towards him and curl his hand around Evan's wrist in an attempt to pull him back. He got himself free from his grasp as Tyler stepped forward, giving Daithi a hard shove against Jonathan's shiny blue sports car. A hard punch to his nose sent blood splattering across the blue metal. With his bloody pig mask, Tyler looked like a type of demon in the neon light, the holes were his eyes should be were all black, filled with shadows. Evan watched as Tyler pulled out his own gun from his jacket, fear paralysing him in place.
"You want him to Come Back slow? You are making him suffer." Tyler yelled, giving Daithi another hard shove against the car."We never make each other suffer before a Come Back. That's how Glitches are created! If you make us suffer, I'll make you suffer!" Tyler's angry voice echoed throughout the parking lot. Evan watched with wide eyes, wanting to pull Jonathan into his arms and protect him from all this pain. Before he could move, Tyler turned, raising his gun to point it at Jonathan.
"Wait! What are yo-" Brock's hand clamped over Evan's mouth as he pulled him back. Everyone's questioning eyes were on Evan.
"M-Make...M-Make it quick…" Jonathan coughed, taking the attention away from Evan.
The next gunshot echoed through the parking lot, ringing painfully in Evan's ears as Jonathan fell forward onto the pavement, blood pooling around him. He became aware of someone screaming as he struggled against Brock who had no choice but to let him fall. The hard pavement cut open his hands and knees, blood and gravel smeared against his palms. Evan realised it was himself screaming, wailing and sobbing as if Tyler had really killed Jonathan.
"Why?" Evan screamed, tears streaming down his face. No one moved. No one said anything. They didn't understand Evan's pain. On the hood of the black car, the golden eyes of his owl mask seemed to watch everything, taking in the scene of the boys tensing with the feeling of being in presence of what they thought was a monster. "Why would you kill him?"