Lights, cameras, and disco balls descended from the upper reaches of Dr. Alphys' smashed laboratory ceiling. Whirring and clicking sounded in its heights from unseen gears and pulleys while ripped wiring drooped down and sparked in despair. Mettaton clapped, meanwhile, as confetti danced from the darkness above and rained on Frisk and the twins. Bowing for his television audience, he said, "Welcome, beauties, to today's quiz show!"
"Uncle Mettaton's a box?!" shrieked Verdana, trying to push Frisk's hand out of his way so he could see better.
Vivaldi pointed at Mettaton and cried, "Where'd all your arms go?!"
"Don't be rude!" Frisk scolded, though they braced themselves to shield the twins from any falling rebar. In the middle of the flashy decorations and broadcast equipment dropped a multicolored, blinking sign that read 'Game Show'.
Frisk had no idea what to do. It was too late for the twins to change to monster form now that cameras were rolling in their faces. The whole Underground might be watching!
Meanwhile, Sans had fallen asleep. Standing up.
"Well, well, well~!" cooed Mettaton, rolling past the flabbergasted Alphys. "Rumor has it that a human has arrived in the Underground, and here they are, but wait—there's more! A trio of humans!" Mettaton swayed toward Frisk and the twins to extend a graceful hand in their direction. At once, the cables in the ceiling lowered a garish podium with large, rectangular buttons until it landed with a thud in front of Frisk. "I can already tell it's gonna be a great show. Everyone give a big hand for our three wonderful contestants!"
Hot spotlights shined on Frisk and the twins in an array of colors among the spinning disco balls, and boisterous music played alongside recorded applause.
"Never played before, lovelies? Let's do a warmup," Mettaton said, rolling dramatically to and fro to spite his robotic voice and block shape. He flipped the microphone in his hand and pointed it at his human contestants. "There's only one rule. Can anyone tell me what it is?"
"Um," said Vivaldi, who raised her hand like she was at school, "no cheating?"
"Cheating would defeat the purpose of our show, but no, darling," said Mettaton, blowing the little girl a kiss.
"Oh, I know!" piped up Verdana, leaping toward the microphone. "Kick ass!"
"Verdana!" cried Frisk, taking both their open hands with palms facing forward and swishing them back and forth in concert. 'Behave!'
The boy had enough sense to blush. "But that's what Daddy says!"
Sans snored. Or was that a snort?
"We do have a strict schedule to keep, so know that our game is simple~" said Mettaton, his display panel flashing yellow.
"Answer correctly..."
His panel blinked and flared red.
"OR YOU DIE."
Viv and Ver shrank behind Frisk as Alphys gulped. They had little doubt Mettaton could make good on his threat. Frisk, however, stood firm. They had not made it this far to quit. Not when they were almost home.
The game show began. Frisk somewhat recalled its questions, since life-or-death situations were powerful memory stimuli, and it helped that Frisk was not blind, numb in each limb due to overgrown flowers, or hobbling around with Sans as their giant crutch. The content was milder, too, like counting flies in a jar instead of bloodied fingernails.
Several turns in, however, the questions turned into trick questions. On the verge of getting zapped, Frisk spied Alphys curving her hands into letters. She was giving them answers!
Soon after, an insanely long word problem made the clock run down while Frisk and Alphys read it, but then, a wisp of blue punched the correct answer as the clock reached "1".
Frisk glanced sidelong at Sans. Was he really sleeping?
The game show continued.
"In the dating simulation, Mew Mew Kissy Cutie, what is Mew Mew's favorite—"
Flush with fangirl joy, Alphys squealed the answer. In detail. And then went on to explain how snail ice cream related to its powerful lesson on friendship.
Cover blown.
"Alphys, Alphys, Alphys. You aren't helping our contestant, are you? Ooooooh! You should have told me!" said Mettaton, bouncing on his wheel merrily. He wagged his finger and tsked. "I'll ask a question you'll be sure to know the answer to!" Spinning in place and turning toward Frisk, he cried, "Who is Dr. Alphys' crush?"
* Undyne
* Asgore
* The human
* Don't know
Frisk dragged their fingertips toward the most obvious answer, feeling badly about it, but—
"UNDYNE!" the twins yelled, poking out their heads from behind Frisk's back and reaching toward the button.
Alphys crumpled into a scarlet, flaming ball of shame. "Aaaah…."
But in that instant, Frisk cringed and instead pressed the button for "Don't know".
"Moooooom!" Viv and Ver groaned.
"Correct," said Mettaton, patting the light panel on his chest.
The twins blinked. "Huh?!"
"Dr. Alphys has a crush on...the unknowable," Mettaton continued, giving Alphys an eyeless, metallic look of disdain. "You see, Alphys believes there is someone out there. Someone watching her. Someone she thinks is 'cute' and 'interesting'." The robot waved to empty air. "Hello, theoretical person. Dr. Alphys likes you. Too bad you're not real."
A derisive laughtrack sounded out of nowhere. Frisk looked around the destroyed ceiling but saw no speakers.
Sans kept snoring.
"H-hey, I've done research about this!" Alphys cried, sweating with embarrassment. She tugged at her collar and mumbled, "There are alternate universes out there! S-someday, maybe, I could meet them..."
"We like you, Dr. Alphys!" the twins cheered, the flashing lights of the game show glinting on their pointy teeth. Smiling, Frisk nodded their agreement. Even after such a brief introduction, to them, Alphys was precious.
Alphys scratched her blushing cheek. "T-thanks."
"Well, well, well," Mettaton said, his electronic voice chiding them all. "With Dr. Alphys helping you, the show has no dramatic tension. But this was just the pilot episode! Next up, more drama! More romance! More bloodshed! Until next time, darlings~" he said, retracting his wheel, converting it into a rocket, and blasting out of sight.
Once all the cameras and other tech slipped out of view, silence fell except for the crackle of distant, sparking wires. A slip of paper fluttered from above toward Alphys, who flailed wildly and just managed to grab it. Then, the scientist groaned. It was an IOU from MTT.
"Now that everyone knows we're hiding humans," Sans said, deciding his nap was done, blinking his eye sockets open, and peering at Alphys, "got any idea how to send 'em home? 'Cause I got a theory. Our Underground's got a barrier, but they," he said, jerking his thumb in Frisk's direction, "already broke theirs. If their human's missing, so's ours."
"Oh no," Alphys said, clasping her face in both hands. "You don't mean—?"
Frisk sat on Alphys' bed once more between the twins, who flopped sideways onto their lap. In all Frisk's desperation, in all their eagerness to bring their children home, it had not occurred to them that they had replaced someone, a human like them who had fallen into this Underground.
The human of this world.
"What about us?" murmured Vivaldi, snuggling against her mother. This was too confusing for one day, let alone several. It was hard to keep up.
"You and Ver were born on the surface. You're special," Frisk said, stroking her hair. Then, realization dawned on Frisk, and they gasped. "That means the other me is—!"
"Yup," Sans said. A styrofoam cup of cooked, instant noodles appeared in his hands, fetched directly from Alphys' stash. "With the other me."
Alphys furrowed her eyebrows at Sans. "Why the other you?"
"That's his wife. Those are his kids. That's why they're skeletons," Sans said, producing a pair of plastic forks before handing the steaming cup to Frisk for the grateful, smiling twins. "Might wanna blow on it first."
"Can't believe you said that with a straight face," said Alphys, a fine blush spreading on her nose.
"I'm a chill skell. Other me? Not so chill right now," said Sans as he shrugged. A bag of popato chisps appeared in his hands next, and he pulled it open. "If anything, he's chomping at the bit hard enough to break his sharp teeth."
Frisk bit their lip, their red eyes brimming with worry as they gathered in the twins and held the noodle cup for them. They knew better than anyone what happened when their husband lost control.
"So we want to create conditions where our worlds can intersect again," Alphys said, guilt sagging her shoulders. Pulling the barrettes out of her lab coat pocket, she sighed. "Viv and Ver can try, but..."
"We don't even know what we did!" Verdana said. Woefully, he blew on the drooping noodles that Frisk offered.
"Wait!" Vivaldi shook her head, reached over, and took her brother's hand. "It's because we did this, right?"
With sudden understanding, they both closed their eyes and, before long, the light around them tinted red, blending into the stripes of their sweaters.
"We wanted to see the Underground," said Vivaldi.
Verdana mumbled, "We were bored, so..."
"...we wanted to go right away," Vivaldi finished, beginning to sniffle.
"You didn't mean to come here. Your magic was too big, remember?" Frisk said, softly. The twins nodded, but held their mother's legs tight. "Please don't blame yourselves." Then, Frisk smiled, realizing just how much Viv and Ver's unconscious intent to travel Underground resembled their very conception. They set down the Instant Noodles and rubbed the twins' trembling backs. "Can you think of Daddy?"
The twins nodded again. At the same moment, the barrettes flashed white in Alphys' hand, and she flinched. Perhaps their proximity to the twins activated them? But Alphys' thoughts were cut off when voices sounded from the crystals.
'They're contacting us—'
'VIV! VER! SWEETHEART!'
"Sans?" Frisk whispered. At the sound of their husband, their heart jumped and a pair of tears slipped down their cheeks. His voice. His name for them.
"Daddy!" shouted the twins, opening their eyes but keeping their hands firmly clasped.
Frisk cleared their throat and called out, "We're here! We're safe!"
'Heard that?! Now bring them home, you scaly piece of shit! NOW!'
'Ugh, I already told you I can't. The twins did it, not me. Wait—my readings say I deactivated the crystals. How in the hell—?'
"Of course I deactivated them!" Alphys' grunted, her snout flaring with anger. "Now shut up so the twins can focus on teleporting!"
'They can't teleport across dimensions without the crystals attached, you fool! They're hybrids! Why do you think I augmented their magic in the first place? Their only magic source is their father!'
"Heya, Sans here," said the squat skeleton from his spot beside Alphys' busted workbench, his eyes drawn closed while he gave the bloom of fragmented light in Alphys' hand a friendly wave. "Other-Sans, got a human with ya?"
'Sans?! What the f—'
"Kids present, Other-Me," said Sans, his grin fixed. "Got a human?"
'...Yeah. A human kid named Frisk.'
"Good," said Alphys, breathless. "Please keep them close, Sans. We're sending your family home."
'No, you're not, idiot. The Sans with you can't help because he isn't their father.'
"But he helped us before when our magic went crazy," said Vivaldi. "Right, Ver?"
"Uh huh!" nodded Verdana, excited.
"My children do have a version of your magic," said Frisk, motioning to the Sans in front of them. "Please, try to help us."
"Can't promise nothing." Though groggy enough to fall back asleep, Sans stepped closer and joined his hands with the twins. "But here goes."
As soon as he did so, Frisk pressed their forehead to their children, who tuned out all the arguments surrounding them and focused solely on the father they loved.
A brilliant, scarlet light, bolstered by Sans' blue, shot from between the twins and swallowed the room. It grew and grew until everything else faded. The red light shifted to gold, and then gained dark outlines which sprang up into a wide room of columns and stained glass.
The judgement hall.