All I want is peace of mind...

Seven

Orithyea

Chapter 14: The Interlude

"So?"

Tsuna bit his lower lip. They were already in front of his house and all he wanted to do was scream at his stupidity in his pillow. He didn't mean to bring Reborn into this mess nor did he even plan to be in this mess. "I'm sorry. Please forget about that. It's just a mistake," said Tsuna, looking down at the floor. He bitterly laughed at his predicament. This was probably the worst case of déjà vu he has ever had.

"It's okay." That made Tsuna look up again. He didn't expect him to be accommodating. "Just like Hibari, I am a man of my word, Sawada Tsunayoshi." Reborn smugly grinned.

Tsuna froze, completely shocked and then embarrassed. Did Hibari tell Reborn about everything that has happened? About him? He suddenly became self-conscious and mortified, thinking that he was being made fun of. How much did he tell him? Even more than that, what about him did he say? "Hi...Hibari-san was telling you everything?" Tsuna felt his throat parch.

Much to his surprise, the older teen ruffled his hair. "He didn't. I have my own way of knowing." He let his hand fall back to his side. "I'll pick you up tomorrow at noon. Don't eat lunch—"

"Tsu-kun, is that you? Oh! Hello." Nana came out of the house, surprised at Reborn's presence.

"Good evening. I'm Reborn. I'm currently dating your son." Reborn held his hand out. The brunet no longer had the energy to protest, and he knew better than to do so.

Nana subtly glanced towards Tsuna in confusion, but nonetheless shook Reborn's hand. "Hello. I'm Nana, Tsu-kun's mother. Would you like to come in for tea and snacks?"

"I would love to, but it's getting late." He redirected his attention back to Tsuna. "I'll be going now. Thanks for tonight, Tsunayoshi-kun." Reborn began leaning down towards Tsuna, which made him worry. Hie! I-is he going to kiss me? Tsuna was preparing to push him away until he felt himself being hugged. "Your mind sure moves fast, Dame-Tsuna," whispered Reborn teasingly. "Good night to you both."

The mother and son only watched his retreating back. Once out of their sight, Tsuna nervously looked at Nana, wondering what she was thinking of him now. It wasn't his fault that he was getting into all of these unnecessary situations. Well, maybe it is, but it wasn't like he wanted it. He just wanted his peaceful and normal life to come back, to laugh and smile with Kyoko again. On the other hand, could he really go back to his life of being alone? Of being bullied again and again and again?

"It's getting cold. Let's go inside."

Once inside, Nana simply went to the living room and opened the television while Tsuna only stood dumbfounded by the door sill. It didn't comfort the brunet that she wasn't saying anything, so, this time, he took the initiative. "Reborn's just a friend." I guess?

"That's nice, Tsu-kun. You should bring your friends here."

"S-sure."

Silence drifted between the two, and the sole noise was the sound coming from the television. Tsuna shifted his feet to and fro, not knowing what to say. Finally, Nana stood up and smiled softly. "Tsu-kun, I trust you. If you say he's just a friend, then he's just a friend. If you say he's your boyfriend, then he's your boyfriend. I want you to be happy, but I'll admit that I was surprised. Is he from that group, too? The Vo...vo..." Nana furrowed her eyebrows, not knowing what to say.

Tsuna looked down to his feet. "Vongola. Yes, he's also from that group."

"He seems nice, but what of Hibari-kun?" Nana's face showed that she didn't want to ask. Tsuna couldn't blame her. If he was his own son, then he would be worried, too. Not to mention that his mother seemed to like the prefect and him together.

"He's dating Kyoko-chan."

"Kyoko-chan?" Nana paused as realisation finally dawned. "Kyoko-chan likes Hibari-kun? Oh, Tsu-kun! Do you want to talk about it?" Hours and hours, he could go on how grateful he was to have Nana as his mother. There was no pity in her eyes nor in her voice, only the genuine effort of reaching out and letting him know that he wasn't alone.

He was loved.

Sometimes, Tsuna just wanted to cry.

So many years have passed that he was made fun of and isolated. No one would have thought that his life would change, that he would remain as nothing more than Dame-Tsuna, always useless, incompetent by birth, and a permanent fool. Even he had already accepted his life as is. He had long given up on changing it. Because no matter how much he tried, both in physical activities or in studying, there was no change.

Then again, that was his mindset more than a week ago. Ask him now if his status quo had changed and he would immediately nod. Little by little, he could feel his only best friend slip away from him. But, Tsuna was sure that was a good thing. He had been holding Kyoko back for too long now – always depending on her, always having her support. Tsuna didn't know how to make it up for her. Somehow, in a way, he knew that at the very least, he could help bring Hibari and Kyoko together, whatever his genuine feelings about it would be.

On the other hand, sometimes Tsuna just wanted to be selfish. What has he done to deserve being hurt over and over again? He'd look at Mochida or his other bullies and scowl, wondering and wondering why it wasn't them that was experiencing what he was experiencing every day: pain, fear, and anxiety. Several times he imagined them as the victims and him the bully, and that very thought scared him. Has he become a monster brought out by fear and hate? Tsuna didn't hate them nor did he want to hate them. He had tried, and continuously does so, to understand why this was happening. At the end of his thoughts, he could only come to one conclusion:

He was weak.

Recently, though, his line of thought has changed. He gained new friends, a couple of acquaintances—or as he dared described Mukuro and Reborn, and a person whose relationship he found indescribable. Perhaps this was a sign for him to change for the better, a second chance, if he must say so. His status quo had already changed, and if he managed to keep the pace, then the dream of achieving a new life would no longer be considered an impossibility. He closed his eyes and imagined him, Gokudera, and Yamamoto hanging out together and laughing, a scene he then was absolutely sure would never happen. But it was possible now, and he didn't want to waste it anymore.

There was still the Vongola problem, though. After his week with Reborn, a week that would surely be nerve-wrecking, he would strive to strengthen his friendship with Gokudera and Yamamoto. Admittedly, at the back of his mind, he knew he simply wanted to avoid Kyoko and Hibari. On the brighter side, he could still feel the giddiness and warmth of the thought of change.

"Tsu-kun?"

He had to blink multiple times before his train of thought returned to the present. Nana was looking at him concernedly, and he wanted nothing more than to not make his mother worry over him. He smiled. "Thanks, Mom, but I'll tell you after everything's done. It's all right."

It's all right. This time, I'll make it work. This time, I'll make myself happy while still thinking of those precious to me. I have to fight for myself. I have to stand up for myself.

I won't be alone anymore. I don't want to be alone anymore. I never even wanted to be.