As far as captors went, Marni supposed Captain Delgado and his crew weren't so terrible. Certainly they were a step up from Idesta. When they took her back to their ship, the Espuma de los Amantes, they did not bind or shove her roughly forward. Delgado simply guided her with a hand rested gently on her shoulder. The two times she attempted to break away between the Wooden Wench and the ship, Delgado only laughed and pulled her back. Despite his playful demeanor, he was too alert and quick for Marni to slip away from, which was likely why he saw no need to bind her. Her escape attempts were only half-hearted anyway. While it would be a simple enough matter to follow the coast back to Kirkwall, without coin, food, or weapon, Marni wasn't confident that she would survive the trip by herself. After all, she had spent her life in the tunnels beneath the city, and knew nothing of surviving in the wild beyond recognizing and preparing the medicinal herbs Anders used in the clinic. But knowing which berries were poisonous and which were edible or snaring anything other than the rats she'd catch in Darktown were completely outside of her skillset. So staying with the pirates was her best chance of survival for the time being. And if these Crows would train her as Delgado said, it could be worth remaining with the Espuma's crew until they reached Antiva.
The thought of going to Antiva made Marni's stomach feel stone-heavy. She would not see Anders or her sister for a long time. Maybe never again. Roe who had been with her through every terrible thing in her life, who had skipped meals countless times so Marni could eat, who'd snuggled close to her on cold nights to keep her warm; Anders who'd taught her to read and make medicine, who had come for her and fought for her, who'd wept when he'd thought she was dead; they were maybe lost to her forever. As they neared the dock, Marni's nose started to run and her eyes clouded as she considered the possibility that no one would ever care about her again. In all her life, she could count only three people who had really loved her. One was dead and two were out of reach. And now she was being passed between people who saw her only as someone they could use to make coin. Would the Crows be any different?
Delgado must have noticed the slight trembling of Marni's shoulder beneath his hand; he abruptly stopped their leisurely pace and knelt to the ground, turning Marni to face him. He searched her face, his brow knit and lips slightly puckered. "What is this?" he said. "This little killer of men is crying? How can this be?"
Marni's face twisted angrily at his teasing, but still the tears came. "What's it to you?" she snapped.
His eyes widened and his mouth twitched. He placed a forefinger beneath her chin and gently turned her face from side to side. "Besides the water damage you are doing to the very face I am depending on being able to sell in Antiva?"
Marni pulled her face from him and growled.
Delgado smiled with surprising patience. "This is a difficult thing, little bird. Being handed off to strangers, traveling to strange new lands, heading toward an uncertain fate. If you were wholly brave in the face of it all, I would think you a golem rather than a child. But one with your fire will not be subject to the will of others for long."
Marni frowned, not trusting gentleness from one who owned her. The magnetism of his charm made her all the more panicked.
"Endure what comes, as you must, for your survival," he continued. "And take what you can from every day. Every hand that strikes you imparts a lesson." He brushed a tear from her cheek with his thumb, and Marni didn't pull away. "Try not to miss those lessons by focusing on the pain of the blow."
Marni nodded and sniffed back the stream of her running nose. She supposed Delgado's words were meant to be wise, and there was something to them. She'd learned a lot about people by watching who they hurt, why, and how. But she wondered, did Delgado's words come from his being forced to endure his own abuse at the hands of others or from being a man who forced others to endure, thinking it a valuable lesson every time he let his hand strike? She'd encountered many human men who fell into the latter group, especially those with the trappings of power like the guards, Templars, and carta. And surely a man who commanded a ship and readily bought and sold little girls was a person with power. But he had not struck her when she'd attempted to escape as Idesta would have, which at the very least made Marni feel easy that at least Delgado did not possess a quick temper.
Apparently satisfied with their conversation, Delgado's smile broadened and he tousled her hair playfully. "Alright, little bird?" he asked brightly.
Marni nodded, a little embarrassed that she had shown herself to be such a child in front of Delgado and his men.
"Excellent!" Delgado said, hopping to his feet and turning Marni back toward the docks. He patted her on the shoulder. "To the ship, then!"
They continued their path through the market, and Marni craned her neck to try to guess which ship in the docks ahead was the Espuma. The grandest ship was manned by people with elaborate twisting metal hats, masks, and bright armor of glistening scales and dyed leather. Each person looked mostly like the others, with only the size of their hats and pauldrons setting them apart. The uniformity of their attire and the straight-backed stick-up-their-arse way they walked reminded Marni of the guards and Templars of Kirkwall, though their armor was much different. A smaller ship next to the first was manned by rough looking humans, with unkempt beards and worn leathers. They stomped on and off the ship carrying crates to a woman who was marking things on a paper she carried and pointing at various crates. The ship itself looked as brow beaten as the sailors who manned it: greyed and weather-worn, patched in places with black tar.
Another ship, smaller than each, but better cared for than the second, was peopled by men and women in light tunics and dresses, belted or sashed with silk scarves. A few wore polished leathers over their garments, and most sported thigh-high boots and daggers at their hips. The people working that ship seemed neither as serious as the first or as surly as the second. Marni knew without a doubt that this was the Espuma and its crew.
As they neared, Delgado sighed ecstatically and squeezed Marni's shoulder. "Is she not a beauty? Have you ever beheld her like?"
"Who?" Marni asked squinting her eyes to pick out which of the ship's crew he might be referring to. "The lady in blue with the dark hair?" she said, referring to a woman with a bountiful figure who was perched on the railing of the ship near the masthead, waving cheerily in their direction.
He and the two sailors with them laughed uproariously. "Ah, child!" he said through his guffawing. "I mean the Espuma herself, of course. She is the only lady I will ever have eyes for!"
Marni scrunched up her nose and tilted her head, considering why he'd call his ship a lady. "It's a boat," she said flatly. "Where's the lady come into it?"
"A boat?" Delgado said, with a note of offense in the sudden shrillness of his voice. "She's a ship! And the finest one to sail the Waking Sea."
"How's it fine? That one's bigger and the wood is shinier."
"Brasca!" Delgado exclaimed. "Your Mistress indeed spoke true when she said you knew just how to strike a man to make him bleed! What cruelty from one whose tears I dried mere minutes ago!" Marni did not understand exactly why he was so upset, but she giggled at his dramatic staggering, as he mimed having his men pull an imaginary knife from his back. He gaped at her as she laughed, though his eyes danced with mirth. "And now you take joy in the wound you've dealt me? Ah, you will make a fine Crow indeed." As Marni continued to laugh at his antics, Delgado crouched down behind her and put his chin on her shoulder like a tamed parrot. "A ship's beauty," he whispered, "is not in the polish of her hull or the size of her sails. It is her spirit and love of her captain and crew that make her lovely beyond measure. The Chevaliers who man the Bijou that you were so admiring care nothing for their ship. She is a tool to them, maintained out of duty, not passion!" his tone was thick with disgust as he sneered at the great ship. "Those indentured workers of that ugly pimple of a ship," he said, pointing at the vessel between the Bijou and the Espuma, "they do not love her. How could they? They detest her! She holds their shackles, not their hearts." He moved to kneel at her side and put his arm around her, gesturing grandly at his own ship.
"But the Espuma de los Amantes!" He blew his ship a loud kiss that made Marni giggle again. He fixed her with a stern gaze, his eyes still dancing. "Do not mock love, little bird," he admonished. "I am trying to teach you something here." Marni tried to tame her grin into a serious expression while Delgado cleared his throat. "Even my lady's name speaks to the ecstasy of her devotees as we cleave to her desires and she to ours."
One of his men nudged him and muttered something to him in a language Marni didn't know. But Delgado waved him off. "What she understands, she is old enough for. What she does not, is no matter," Delgado said to the man who shook his head and chuckled.
Delgado turned back to Marni. "You may not recognize her beauty now, but as you come to know her, you too will recognize that she has no equal. And if you come to love her, as I have no doubt you will, you will become a part of her soul. What do you think of that, child?"
Marni snorted. "I think you drank the still!" she said.
Delgado's men laughed and shoved their captain this way and that while he smiled broadly at Marni. "Just you wait, little one! By the time we reach Antiva, you will be as one ripped from her mother's bosom to leave my lady!"
"Huh?" Marni said twisting her face.
The men and Delgado laughed again and spoke to each other brightly in that language they shared. "Come," Delgado said to Marni. "Let us board."
They walked down the dock and up the gangway to the deck of the ship. They crew cast curious and bemused glances her way and chatted back and forth with the captain in their language. Marni was not shy, but having so many strangers looking her over and likely speaking about her made her shrink against the attention. The large woman she'd spotted from the distance pouted in Marni's direction before shouting something at the captain and crew. Whatever she had said, most of the crew returned to what they were doing before Marni had arrived, and Marni relaxed some as the stares of the men and women left her, and the chatter quieted. Delgado bowed to the woman, and she rolled her dark eyes at him, waving his show of chivalry off.
"Little bird," Delgado said, "this is Carmina Abrigo, the finest Quarter Master ever to grace land or sea. Carmina this is…" Delgado opened his mouth to say her name before he realized that he didn't know it. He looked at Marni, his thick eyebrows knit in a quizzical expression.
Carmina scolded him in their language and Delgado rubbed the back of his neck and blushed. Carmina turned to Marni and bent over. "Forgive my thoughtless captain," she said in a deep melodious voice. "What is your name, love?"
Marni almost answered, but as her lips touched to form the "Mm" of her name, she found she didn't want these people who had purchased her and would soon sell her to the Crows to know her. Idesta had never asked her name, nor had Delgado. And in Kirkwall, most people called her "cur" or "rat" or "whelp" or, more fondly but no less degrading, "kitten" or "minx." Now Delgado affectionately called her a "little bird." The only people who had ever called her by her name, as far as Marni could remember, were those she loved and who loved her. Giving these pirates and slave traders, however likeable they may be, her name, granted them an intimacy that they had not earned.
Delgado smirked. "Have you forgotten it, little bird?"
"I'm Fennec," Marni said abruptly, recalling the little foxes that she'd seen prancing about the grassy hills on her trek to Cumberland.
Carmina smiled warmly, and Marni blushed at how beautiful she found her. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Fennec, love," Carmina said and held out her hand.
Marni looked at Carmina's outstretched hand, glistening with jeweled rings and golden bangles, nails painted ruby, and dotted with little yellow gems. She knew something was expected of her in response to this outstretched hand, but she didn't know what. She'd seen members of the Carta shake hands after a business deal, and she'd seen men kiss the hands of women they courted. This moment didn't fit into either scenario, so Marni just shrugged and said "Okay."
Carmina's smile didn't fade at Marni's slighting. She simply nodded and withdrew her hand. "You'll be staying in the women's barracks with me, love," she said. "Did these boys fetch your things from your Mistress yet?"
"Things? This is all," Marni said holding out her arms and looking down at the threadbare sack dress she wore. Idesta had made her wash it in the sea twice on their way to Cumberland, complaining of the look and smell of it, but it was due for another scrubbing. Lycus had taken her belt and little knife before they'd even reached the coast, so the dress and her undergarments were really all she had anymore.
Carmina frowned and exchange more foreign words with Delgado before returning her attention to Marni with a sympathetic smile. "It's alright, Fennec. We have all you'll need." Carmina took Marni's hand in her own, and Marni was surprised to find the woman's palm was roughly calloused. With all her carefully manicured beauty and fine clothes, Marni had not expected Carmina's hands to be as rough as her mother's. It was a comfort. "Come on," Carmina said tugging her hand a little. "I'll show you where you'll be staying."
Delgado called after them, saying more things that Marni didn't understand. Carmina snapped back at him with mounting irritation, making Marni resolve to learn their tongue as quickly as possible.
Carmina took Marni below deck and into a room with beds bunked in pair bolted to the ground and several locked trunks at the foot of each. Only one bed wasn't bunked, and that one was richly adorned in a dark purple quilt, embroidered with golden flowers. Carmina gestured toward the bed. "All the beds are occupied, love, so you'll need to share with me or one of the others."
Her eyes widened. The only time Marni had ever slept on a bed was when she was sick in Anders' clinic. In the little corner of Darktown her family had staked out as their own, they had only a mat her mother had woven from old rope and rags. The three (or four of them, when her father was around) had shared that mat huddled together until her mother had died, then it was just boney Roe and Marni trying to keep each other warm at night. The thought of having a real bed with down pillows and a soft quilt sounded like a dream. She winced against the guilt she felt that poor Roe was left to shiver herself to sleep while Marni would be wrapped in soft warmth.
Carmina sat down on the bed and pulled a trunk from the foot of the bed to the side. She reached her hand between her breast and pulled out a brass key which she used to unlock the trunk. She began pulling clothing from the trunk and spreading it around her on the bed. Occasionally, she'd hold a piece up to Marni and tilted her head thoughtfully. "Tell me, Fennec, love, what colors do you like?"
"Colors?" Marni asked. What difference did it make what colors she liked?
"Yes, sweetheart! If I'm going to give you some of my clothing, I'd prefer it be something you'll actually like!"
Marni looked doubtfully at the clothing made to fit Carmina's substantial figure and imagined herself positively swimming in the excess fabric. Even hemmed and belted, Marni could not hope to ever fit in Carmina's flowing clothing. "You'd have better luck fitting me for the pillowcase," Marni muttered. And having said it, she wondered if that was exactly what her current dress was made from: a pillow case with some scraps stitched to the bottom to extend the length. She fidgeted a little, thinking herself suddenly very homely in Carmina's eyes.
Carmina laughed. "Oh, silly! I'll cut up a dress or two and stitch them up to fit you as you like." She patted the place beside her and waved for Marni to come over and take a seat. Marni did so with a suspicious glare, not entirely sure what to make of Carmina's generosity. "Before I was a pirate," Carmina said in a conspiratorial tone, "I was a fantastic seamstress. The best in Antiva City! Every noble woman, every princess and queen wanted a gown made by my hands! Oh, how it chaffed me to make fine gowns for all the fine ladies all while wearing clothing not much nicer than those rags of yours."
"Why didn't you make something nicer for yourself?" Marni asked.
"I could not afford the fabric. I would collect scraps from the beautiful gowns I made, but I am not some waif of a thing to be able to clothe myself in scraps! I needed yards and yards, but all I could afford for myself was rough and plain fabric." Carmina smiled wickedly. "One day I was sitting in my little hovel, staring at a beautiful brocade, a lovely crimson embossed with gold. I was to use it to make a Queen's gown for her son's upcoming wedding. I kept staring at that fabric thinking of how the Queen would only wear it once before it would be put in storage until moths ate it into rags. I thought about how the Queen and all those admiring the gown would think nothing of the person who owned the hands that had made it. I thought of how this gown would never be precious to her. And I could not force myself to cut it for her. Instead, I made it to my own sizing, I altered the design to suit my own whims and features. And when it was done, I put it on, packed my bags with what little I had of personal value, walked down to the docks, and made myself a pirate!"
Marni's eyes widened. "How do you make yourself a pirate?"
Carmina laughed. "With a lot of nerve and the good will of a captain who maybe saw a little of herself in me and decided to take a chance hiring me on. I've served on a few ships since then, working my way up to first-mate! Now, what fabric I can't steal from shipments we raid, I can buy. And while I don't look quite like those fine ladies of Antiva," she said with a wink, "I look exactly as I wish in the finest fabrics of Thedas!"
Marni looked around at the many garments spread out on the bed, and cautiously touched a few. They seemed fine indeed! "What did the Queen do when you stole her fabric?" Marni asked, tracing the delicate cream embroidery on a leather vest.
Carmina shrugged. "Not much, I suppose. It would have irritated her to be defied, I'm sure, but the loss of some fabric would not have so much as dented her coffers. I doubt she lost a night's sleep over it, and probably had something almost as fine made by another willing seamstress."
Marni kicked the frame of the bed with her heel. "Should've put pepper in her panties or something," she grumbled, bothered that the ungrateful Queen had not been made to feel Carmina's anger.
Carmina laughed and gave Marni a little sideways hug. "I should have at that, love!"
Marni blushed at Carmina's hug, enjoying the warmth and spiced scent of her. She knew she shouldn't trust her. While Carmina hadn't been the one to arrange her purchase, she was still counted among her captors. Just the same, Marni felt more at ease in Carmina's company than she had felt since leaving Kirkwall. She liked the way she smiled and laughed, the way she took up space without shame, and how the crew and even the Captain shrank when she scolded them. Marni had never known a person like her.
The boat let out a low groan as the space around them shifted, making Marni jump and give Carmina a worried expression. Carmina tousled her hair and patted her cheek. "You're fine, Fennec! It's just the ship being prepared to leave dock. We'll be on our way soon, love. Now tell me what kinds of clothes you like! I can't wait to dress you up like a dashing little doll!"
Marni grinned sheepishly and secretly wished that she had given Carmina her real name.