Thank you for the reviews/faves/follows!

18. Home

The week was almost over. I had waited days for the boys to come and apologise for their callous response but to no avail. Lee had come to visit me several times, claiming to know nothing for the reason of my not being present with them during meals or in the common room anymore, and that the twins were not telling him anything. I had to explain everything to him over a cup of tea, and I was surprised to see him almost cringe when I told him of Darren. His reaction was not as explosive as the twins', but he certainly was not happy.

"He's my – well, sort of my cousin, I guess. Never really got on with him; the whole pureblood mind-set pushed our families apart. Actually, I think he's my second cousin on my mum's uncle's nieces…"

You could imagine my shock upon hearing that.

"He seems nice. He thought I was a Gryffindor and still asked me to the ball. That doesn't seem much of pureblood-Slytherin mentality," I replied, sure that Lee had been informed of something by the twins and was now aiding them in presenting Darren in a bad light.

"Well, I guess not…" Lee trailed off. "But he's still bad news. My parents wouldn't keep me away from him if he wasn't."

"Your parents kept you away because of his parents, not him," I reasoned.

"Ella, just…you're still going to go with him, aren't you?"

I nodded.

Lee heaved a great sigh and pushed his dreadlocks back from his face. "Just be careful then."

His voice was ominous and worrying. But he was still with me.

The girls didn't come either, although Lee had mentioned that Angelina was curious as to my sudden disappearance and was hounding on the twins viciously, knowing that whatever had happened was down to them. But why she didn't visit, I hadn't a clue.

The corridors were dark and dreary, the wind howling against the castle walls chilling me through all my layers. It was the first time I had gone on one of my midnight walks on my own in a long time, and a feeling of suspicion and apprehension overcame me. I put it down to the shadows flickering in all corners and the winter darkness, something I had always feared, but now coming back in full force. I wrapped by arms around my chest during a particularly powerful gust of wind and almost toppled over, leaning up against a cold stone wall to stay upright. Even my thick and heavy clothes weren't strong enough to combat the chill.

My bags were all packed. It was definite: I would be leaving for Ottery St. Catchpole tomorrow. Dumbledore told me to go to his office at any time during the day and I would Floo to my home. I had hoped that the boys would have apologised to me by now so that I could say my goodbyes. Maybe I was being a bit too harsh on them. After all, they were just looking out for me. Perhaps I should go and see them…

No. They were the ones being stereotypical and rude, completely ignoring me until the last minute. I had every right to be the one waiting for them.

Before I knew it, it was Friday.

I had decided to wait all morning to see if the boys would come, spending my entire day in the kitchen, but they never did. I stood in Dumbledore's office with only two bags full of clothes I'd need. I had a spare packed away for presents – if I'd decided to buy them any.

"Will you be returning in time for the ball, Ella?" Dumbledore asked.

I nodded my head at him and smiled. "Yes, I will be. The day before I'll be back."

Dumbledore nodded and passed me the bowl with Floo powder. "I assure you, everything will be fine. You have fine friends back home who will most certainly look after you and will be most pleased to see you again," Dumbledore reassured me, noticing my hesitance to move.

I nodded again and tightened the straps of my bags around my shoulders, and with a shaky hand, grabbed the powder and dropped it. I swirled away in green flames, grinning back at Dumbledore's smile and Fawkes's cry.

I tumbled out of the fireplace into the dark dusty living room. I looked around, noticing the exact familiarity of the building with everything in its place. A sad smile grew on my lips, seeing the empty armchairs side by side. Slowly, I observed the little house, every little corner and cobweb, before throwing my bags on my old bed, watching it sink under the weight. I was desperate to go over to Mrs Brimble's, to see Philip and Zoe and all her other brothers, to see Imogen and her baby.

But first, I needed to assess the shop.

The streets were full of bustling people shopping for presents. The market had a radio blasting out Christmas songs at full volume, but it still didn't cover the joyful conversing and laughter of the shoppers. Standing on the pavement, my hat and scarf covering most of my face, I noticed Mrs Pike across the road, reading the description of phones through a shop window. I saw Mr Dicks and Mr Babbington at their stall, rushing to get everyone their orders with grins. Imogen's husband was dancing with a lumpy bundle in his arms by the sweet shop, twirling and sashaying in circles.

The festivity of the street made me smile and I strolled over to the shop next door. The light was on inside, filled with decorations and some light music of its own with a few customers gently observing the shelves. I pushed open the door and walked in, the jingle of a bell alerting my presence.

The shop was colourful and bright with tinsel and paper chains and models of miniature reindeers sitting on shelves. I laughed lightly, seeing a gap where the lenticular cards had been. The Christmas song was familiar and old, something by Wham, I believe.

"Good afternoon! Freezing cold out today. Would you care for any assistance, ma'am?"

The voice stopped me in my movements. I pulled my hat off but kept my back to her.

"I don't know, can you help me look for an incredibly pretty girl, overly tall, insanely thin with massive breasts by the name of Zoe?" I asked teasingly, turning around and grinning at the girl in question.

Her sharp blue eyes widened and she squealed.

"ELLA!" Zoe charged forward and grappled me in an exhausting hug, almost pushing me into a customer. "How the hell have you been? I've missed you so much!" She paused her excited ramblings and pulled away from me, punching her fist into my shoulder.

"Ow! Bloody hell, Zo, what was that for? I see you after months only for you to abuse me!"

"Where have you been?!" she asked, hands on hips. "I come home the other day to find out from mum that you disappeared one night. Without even a note! You could have died!" Zoe exclaimed. She pinched her eyes shut and then greeted me with a warm smile. "I'm glad you're back."

I laughed and pulled her into another hug. "I missed you too, Zo."

"Oi! What's going on here?"

I retracted my arms from Zoe and flung myself at Nate.

"Ella! Hi!" he laughed.

"Hello, Nate," I giggled.

"What are you-?"

"I think we should discuss this during our break," Zoe interrupted. "You go off into the back Ella, we'll finish up here."

With a gentle shove, she pushed me behind the counter and into the little back room before leaving. I put on the kettle and unwound my scarf from around my neck, throwing it on a chair as I made three cups of tea.

Zoe and Nate entered the room a few minutes later and settled themselves on the chairs.

"We've closed for the day, now. God, that was tiring," Zoe huffed.

"It wasn't as bad as yesterday," Nate replied, quirking an eyebrow.

"That's because Moira was here yesterday," Zoe said.

"Who's Moira?" I asked.

Zoe grinned and answered while Nate flushed and gulped down his tea. "Nate's girlfriend."

"She is not my girlfriend!"

We giggled. "Well why did she come back to Devon with you all the way from Nottingham?"

"Because she wanted to meet you, duh. And mum; said she wanted to ask her some stuff because she studied French as well."

"Uhuh, sure."

"So, Ella," Nate said, "care to tell us where the hell you've been these past few months?"

They both turned to face me with worried or confused expressions, suddenly serious.

I cleared my throat. "Have you heard about Bill?"

"Yeah, we heard," Nate nodded solemnly.

"Ella, we're so sorry! Mum emailed me during term and broke the news to me. You must have been so lonely," Zoe grabbed my hands across the table.

I lowered my eyes, avoiding their sombre faces. I didn't dwell too much on Bill's death and I wasn't going to return to that misery again. "Yeah, well, a relative of his turned up from Scotland and it turns out he's my guardian. We moved up to Scotland straight away. I guess I was in shock at the time, so when he asked me if I wanted him to tell anyone about us going I didn't say anything."

"You've been in Scotland all this time!" Zoe cried. "God, it must be freezing up there."

Nate and I laughed at where her mind was focused. "Zoe, I'm sure she has a nice warm house to live in."

The two bantered some more and we laughed. "I really missed you guys," I said, breaking the joyful scene.

They both smiled back. "Group hug!" Zoe yelled, and gathered us in her long toned arms over the table. It was an uncomfortable hug, our bellies pushed up against the edge of the table and our arms around each other's necks.

Maybe home is nothing but a pair of arms holding you when your world is falling apart.

After our chat in the back of the paper shop we returned to my house. For once, there was no food in the house, so we travelled to Mrs Brimble's, where I was engulfed in another crushing hug and smacked by several boys, and ate there. We settled on the sofa and caught up on everything we'd missed. My stories were greatly morphed, for I couldn't tell them that I was in a school for wizards and witches, helping house elves and studying about previously thought mythical creatures.

Someone yelled behind us and Nate sighed. "I must bid you good day ladies, for the mighty plonker Matt is in need of my assistance," he said. Nate hugged me and pressed a quick kiss to my cheek, repeating the actions with Zoe.

"'Ey, how long are back for Ella?" He yelled, walking backwards away from us.

"I'm leaving Friday afternoon."

"Cool! I'll see you guys tomorrow then!" And with that, he turned on his heel and slapped his hand against another boys, walking in the opposite direction from us.

The wind blew harshly and we decided to go to Mrs Brimble's for the night.

The days passed on like this, and soon enough it was like I had never left. Zoe's younger brother Philip was always clinging on to me, crying at the thought of me having to leave at the end of the week. Zoe always grumbled at him, moaning about how he never showed his sister any of the compassion he showed me. He always blew a raspberry at her in response.

Strolling through the town brought unbidden memories to surface. Memories of Nanny Anne, Bill, Jimmy, Zoe and Nate, and George. Every little corner I could link to someone. But the person that most often came into mind was George. He was everywhere. He was on the tree, our little playground of adventures; he was at Imogen's Bakery with me, stealing my cupcake and then demolishing his own; he was at the fruit stall with me, one day finally coming to his senses and trying a red apple. Wherever I went in Ottery St. Catchpole George was there.

I always mentally scolded myself for thinking of him. I had thought that this trip would give me an escape from that world, from them. And then I realised, one day at home when I was dusting the rooms, George was a part of my life. He was always there for me, with whatever I was going through. Even Zoe and Nate couldn't always be there to rely on; they were muggles with no knowledge of the magical world but in fantasy.

And with thoughts of George, came thoughts of Fred. And my body couldn't deal with all the emotions from the memories of a few meetings with him over the past few months. It was shocking, the influence he had on my traitorous body.

It was Wednesday when I informed Zoe of a Christmas Ball over breakfast, saying how I would need a dress to wear. In typical Zoe fashion, she squealed and shrieked and dragged me out to the stores almost instantly. I never did get to finish that sausage.

Ottery wasn't known for its retail. In fact, there were hardly any clothes stores, let alone ones for fancy occasions. But Zoe managed to find them easily and we spent hours upon hours searching. I wasn't very fussy when it came to choosing a suitable dress. All I really wanted was something modest and comfortable. Dresses weren't my thing. But Zoe wouldn't have this. No, the dresses I tried on were either a shade too dark, or too light, too puffy or a smidge too tight. She kept muttering about glitter and jewels and high heels! It was madness. I was close to calling it quits.

We walked outside another store and shivered.

"I can't believe you didn't choose to buy the green one! It was gorgeous," Zoe gushed, her hands flying around her.

"Zoe it was far too short," I laughed, knowing there was no such thing as too short to Zoe.

"We could have asked the guy to adjust it. They do that, you know."

I rolled my eyes at her smugness. "Yes, Zoe, I am very much aware of that. I just…didn't like it," I said. The dress had been a gorgeous forest green with few diamantes dotted around it. The sleeves weren't so bad, reaching just above my elbows and not puffy at all. If it had been a floor length gown, or even reached my knees I would have bought it in a second, but it hardly covered my butt and the back was itchy. The green reminded me of Slytherin, and I didn't think it would be wise to wear a colour like that if the twins were to make an apology. In fact, they'd probably take one look at me and turn away, accuse me of being a traitor and have it in their minds that I agreed to sell my life and soul to Darren.

"At least I'm sorted for until the next holidays," Zoe grinned. She had brought herself a few dresses for the parties to come at her university in London. She had masses already but she couldn't resist herself when she saw the new dresses on sale.

"I think you're sorted for the rest of your life," I muttered.

"Bloody hell, why's it so cold? I'm going to head back home. You comin'?" she asked, emphasising her mood by rubbing her arms with great force.

I shook my head. "Nah, I think I'll stay out for a bit longer."

"Alrighty then, I'll tell mum. Don't stay out too late young lady!"

I exhaled a deep breath when she was out of sight, glad to finally have a moment to myself. I decided to visit the old charity shop across the paper shop. It was surprisingly large for a charity store and many of Ottery's residents didn't even go there but we always donated towards it, enabling it to extend.

There were mainly books in the shop, but the further in you delved the more magical mysteries you would uncover. One time I had discovered an old letter that had been forgotten at the bottom of a tin box. The ink was pale and neat, and I could just make out the outline of a love note from someone in the war. I wasn't sure which war, but it was one of the big world wars. It was a deeply touching letter, so much so that I never got rid of it; I used it as a book mark, seeing as it was already heavily folded over and over again into a thin strip.

I went passed the store front and up the winding stairs where all the odd knick-knacks were hidden. And that was where I saw it: a beautiful ivory dress. It was modest, just like I had wanted, with the chiffon fabric flowing down to the floor. The neckline was what Zoe had described to me as being an A-line cowl and the back of the dress was open and met again at the middle of my back. The slit on the side was barely noticeable.

It was simple. And perfect. I smiled as I traced the gown with my fingers and fumbled with the tag, turning it over in my fingers. My eyes bulged at the price. It wasn't cheap for a high market store let alone a charity shop! Mentally I calculated all I had saved up from my work at Hogwarts and from working at the paper shop. I sighed, realising I had nowhere near enough. I left the charity shop empty handed and headed to Mrs Brimble's.

I spent my last free day at home, steeling myself to do something I had never dared attempt before. Nanny Anne and Bill's room was neat and coated in layer upon layer of dust. Tears came to my eyes smelling the familiar combination of Nanny Anne's sweet scent and Bill's musky man smell. I brushed my hands against my eyes before rubbing my hands together and opening the drawers.

The house was silent as I sorted through the clothes, organising them in piles of the style and sex. I bagged a few garments for myself: a few cosy jumpers of Bill's and some of Nanny's comfortable socks. I had to force myself to go through their underwear. I didn't keep any of them for myself.

Going through their things felt like something I needed to do myself. Really, it was a way for me to interact with the nostalgia of their lives one last time. Each object and article of clothing had a story which I eagerly reminisced immediately, as if they were there all along, just waiting to be summoned. I felt young again, back as a child, exploring the house and its inhabitants while they were out. Any second they would come back and laugh at the organised mess I had somehow managed to make.

And then I remembered they wouldn't be strolling in now or anytime soon. It was a harsh reality.

The second wardrobe in the room was large and seemed enchanted to fit in mounds of not only clothes, but a whole range of paraphernalia. I stumbled over boxes and shoes as I pushed myself further in to see exactly where the wardrobe ended. My fingers brushed plastic and I frowned as I almost fell in trying to grab it. Eventually I gripped the hanger and seized it out.

The plastic covering was dark, removing whatever was underneath it from sight. I reached into the wardrobe again and shuffled around, looking for something – for what exactly I wasn't sure. When I found nothing of importance I returned back to the sheathed object. There was a note attached to the black plastic, stapled on. I carefully pulled it off and read the messy writing.

It was Bill's writing. And Nanny Anne's. It looked as if they had fought for the pen when scribbling down the note. I could picture them: a muscular hunky Scotsman and a charming blonde woman, young and in love as they laid on a bed, gently savouring the moment of sweetness they shared. It didn't last long, of course, as one of them (I imagined Nanny Anne) removed herself from her husband's arms and pulled a small square of paper out of the bedside drawer, with it a pen. Her writing started off elegant, and then Bill sat behind her, enfolding himself around her as only he knew how. His breath would tickle her neck and ears as he read over her shoulder and she would shuffle away from him, only for him to pull her back. Then he would yank her from her waist and snatch the pen from her grasp, scribbling words himself. They would playfully wrestle for ownership of the pen, each writing ridiculous sentences one after another until they succumbed into deep sensual love once again.

I blinked, and the image changed. It was no longer Nanny Anne and Bill in a loving embrace. It was me who replaced Nanny Anne. And then a flash of red hair and I forced the image out of my mind. My breathing was erratic as I awakened in the real world, the note clasped firmly in my hand. The words were jumbled and chaotic, overlapping each other. But I could identify some of them. This was Nanny Anne's wedding gown.

I placed the note on the bed beside me, and slowly removed the plastic, revealing shimmery pale gold. My fingers shook as I fingered the dress. It was strapless and the top of the bodice was sprinkled with gold and silver sequins which disappeared over the full tulle skirt that flowed to the ground. I was in awe. It was the most beautiful dress I had ever laid eyes on; far better than any I had encountered in the shops.

Wetness marred my cheeks and I laughed breathily at my soppiness. It was only a dress! Yet I felt oddly connected to it. It gave off an ethereal aura, matching the angelic qualities sewn into the gown.

I hastily packed away everything else and rushed to Mrs Brimble's, desperate to show Zoe the dress before I gathered my things to depart back to Hogwarts.

One more night with Nate and Zoe. I had to make the best of it.