A/N: I own no part of Twilight. So here is chapter 44 of Static. We're already halfway there.

Enjoy.

XLIV.

i can just hear them now
'how could you let us down?'
but they don't know what i found
or see it from this way round

By late-October, Leah had decided that her world had gone into retrograde again, all because of Paul. She couldn't take it back or deny it anymore; as much as she hated him, he had a lot of power over her.

After Paul's departure, Leah had moved back home with her mother and Seth. Sue had soon been diagnosed with stage IIB breast cancer, so Leah was running around between work and school and doctor visits. She was driving Sue's car around more than ever now even though Seth was the one with the license. Leah just found herself taking more chances because she had more time and, therefore, more responsibilities. She kept forgetting Seth was still in high school; somehow she always felt that he was more mature. She still needed to get her damn license, though. Charlie seemed like the only cop around, but he wasn't, and Leah would hate to go to jail again. She could swear she was starting to lose her hair over all of this and she wasn't even the one who was sick.

On her way to the hospital one night, Leah realized she was a shitty person. Seth's eighteenth birthday had been three weeks ago and she hadn't done a thing for him. He'd gotten his license by himself that day. All she had done was make him tag along with her to pick up Sue from her appointments. When Leah couldn't drop Sue off, Charlie Swan always came through to do it for her. Leah still didn't understand why.

But even though Charlie was a very helpful part of all this care giving, Leah still felt like shit about missing Seth's birthday. That part wasn't Paul's fault, at least.

On the way to the hospital in Forks, Leah pulled into the parking lot of a sketchy-looking roadside convenience store.

"Lee, what are you doing?" Seth asked in his deep voice. Whenever he spoke, Leah remembered that he was eighteen now, not fourteen or thirteen or twelve. That was why she was driving even though he had his license; she had to remember her age.

"You have your ID on you, right?"

"Yeah, why?"

She started to get out. Then she nodded her head toward the outside lights of the store. "C'mon."

He followed her into the store, and she went right to the front counter.

"What, you want cigarettes?" he asked.

"Get outta here," she told him. Then she turned to the cashier. "One ticket for the CashBall, please."

The cashier, an older Quileute, asked for an ID.

Leah turned to Seth. He showed the cashier his license, and then Leah fished two crumpled up dollar bills out of the pocket of her jeans and put them down in the palm of Seth's hand. He handed the cashier the money and in return, got a little piece of paper that said he had a chance of winning a million dollars.

"Wow, Lee," he said as they walked back to the car. "A piece of paper."

"Happy birthday," she said. "Now let's go see Mom."

The hospital was such a familiar place to them now, and Leah and Seth had only been at this for a little over a month, but the Clearwaters were comfortable people. They could fall into the habit of anything. That was probably why it was so easy for life to pass them by.

Leah and Seth always waited for Sue's appointments to be over so she wouldn't have to wait on them. They still had plenty of time before the appointment was supposed to end, so they waited in their familiar blue plastic chairs. Leah sank deep into hers and shut her eyes for a moment—she was exhausted.

"Lee," Seth said quietly.

"What?"

"Why'd you come back home?"

She opened her eyes and looked over to him. He was balancing a textbook on his left knee and a notebook on the other, scribbling in notes.

"What class is all that for?" she asked.

He didn't look up. "AP Stats," he said. "I have a test tomorrow morning. But you didn't answer my question. Why'd you come back home?"

"What do you mean? I live here."

"You moved in with Paul."

"No, I didn't," she said. If I did, then he wouldn't be gone—again.

"Okay, but you were straight-up living with him. You only visited me and Mom to get some more of your stuff."

"I was just down the street."

"Yeah, but why did you move back home at all?"

"'Cause… well, 'cause Paul left."

"No offense, but he's a dumb-ass."

"Well, yeah, Seth."

"You act like you know all this now, but if you knew the whole time then you wouldn't be in this situation again."

Leah sighed. "You don't even know the guy."

"I don't even need to."

"Okay, Mom."

Seth grew quiet. "Lee, Mom got diagnosed with cancer two days after you moved back in."

"What does that have anything to do with me, though?"

"You're a jinx."

Leah paused for a beat. Then her voice went up an octave. "Are you kidding me? Did you really just say that to me?"

"You came too late," he continued. "You wouldn't have even come home if Paul hadn't left, probably."

"Seth, what the hell are you—? Are you okay?"

"Are you?" he asked simply.

"Everything that's been going on with Mom has nothing to do with me or me being with Paul. The fact that you would even think that about me is so fucking dis—"

"Hey there, kiddos," a somewhat voice said. Leah turned around to see her three favorite people in the world: Charlie, Bella, and Jacob.

"Oh, hey," Leah replied, surprised. "Is there a party going on or something?"

"Nah, we just wanted to see Auntie Sue," Jacob said, plopping down in the seat next to Leah's. Bella sat down between Charlie and Jacob. Leah actually wanted to throw up, but she wanted to see her mom more, and she especially wanted Seth out of her face.

Leah tossed the car keys to her brother. "Go home," she told him. "You have a test tomorrow morning, remember?"

"How are you and Mom gonna get home, then?" Seth asked in a pissy tone.

She nodded her head over to her three favorite people in the world.

"Whatever," Seth said, getting up. He stormed past them so fast that he didn't even hear Bella's comment on how impressive it was that he was taking AP Stats.

Jacob looked to Leah and he just mouthed, Wow.

Leave me the fuck alone, Leah thought. You're not even my friend.

"How are you, Leah?" Bella asked, leaning forward to look at her.

The girls hadn't talked since the dinner the Swans had thrown last summer in order to apologize for Bella's attempted homicide.

"I'm fine," Leah replied. "How's the daycare?"

"It's good," Bella replied.

"So what brings you here?" Leah asked, expecting a truthful answer this time.

"The old man really wants to see your mom, I guess," Bella replied with a sad smile.

Leah looked to Charlie. He was hunched over, his nose in a pamphlet about breast cancer.

"All he reads now is stuff about breast cancer," Bella said.

"God, that is so sad," Leah said.

"I think it's sweet."

That was where they were completely different people.

Leah awkwardly leaned back into her chair, and then Sue finally emerged from a door, being walked out by her designated oncology nurse, Linda. Linda looked like a younger version of Sue, with straight brown hair and a genuine smile. Seeing her just made Leah sadder and sadder.

Sue waved goodbye to Linda, and then she approached Charlie. They gently hugged, and it made Leah wildly uncomfortable.

"How'd it go?" he asked her.

"Better," she replied. "At least, it hasn't spread to my lymph nodes. A lumpectomy is the next step."

"We'll get to that next step, then," Charlie replied.

Leah loudly cleared her throat.

Sue turned to her. "Where's your brother?"

"He went home," Leah replied. "He's got a big test tomorrow."

"That boy's always got a big test in Stats. He stays on top of his work, though. He always does so good in class."

This night honestly just gets worse and worse, Leah decided.

"Yeah, well, I'm gonna get a ride with Jacob and Bella," Leah said. "So I'll see you when I get home."

Sue looked at Charlie, and then back to Leah. "I'll see you."

Leah began to walk out to the parking lot, and Jacob and Bella trailed behind. Sue and Charlie trailed far, far behind, murmuring among themselves.

Leah ended up sitting in the backseat of Jacob's Rabbit even though Bella was getting dropped off first, and she honestly felt like an asshole. Leah was the asshole of the year. Asshole of the century. She was probably a jinx, too.

She also turned out to be invisible because once Jacob pulled up to Bella's house, he got out of the car and walked her to her front door. They stood on that porch for what felt like hours, and Leah didn't want to look but she knew they were making out. Bella was probably sucking his dick on the porch, since she was like that, and Leah felt like catching the bus or even walking back to La Push.

It was freezing tonight, and it felt like the night she had lost her virginity to Tom Anderson. A lot had changed since then, but she would still sucker punch any white person who tried to call her Pocahontas again. She wondered if Bella was a freak like that. Maybe she liked to refer to Jacob as Squanto in bed. Or Crazy Horse. That would be kind of kinky.

It was late. It was time for Leah to go home.

So she made a scene—of course she did—and she loudly got out of the backseat of the Rabbit and moved to the front seat. The noise startled Jacob and Bella and they quickly broke apart. Jacob walked back to the car, embarrassed, and drove back to La Push in near silence.

They had just pulled up to Leah's house when Jacob spoke. She didn't know it, but he didn't hate her that much. He just thought she was mostly unpleasant, which was true.

"Hey," he said, "I'm here for ya. I know how it feels."

Leah didn't want to ask what it was. It could be a lot of things. Being accused of jinxing her mom's cancer, being a third and a fifth wheel in the same night, being the dumb sibling, and being dumped like shit once again by the same fucking person were all perfect candidates.

"No, you don't," she replied bleakly.

"Who else but me would know about having one dead parent while the other one's suffering?"

Leah didn't say anything. She just got out of the car and went inside her house.

Jacob wasn't allowed to be right.

A/N: Thanks as always,

HS