Part Five

énouement: the bittersweetness of having arrived in the future and seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell your past self.

L.

and I try to refrain
but you're stuck in my brain
and all I do is cry and complain
because second's not the same

"Quil's truck gives me the creeps," Emily said as Kim handed her a heavy cardboard box labeled Workout shorts. "I still can't believe you guys really did that last summer."

"Don't mention it," Kim replied. Her voice dropped low. "But for real, do not mention it."

"Don't mention what?" Quil asked, approaching the truck with a couple of boxes in his arms. He shoved them in the back.

"The fact that I'm paying you guys in pizza for helping me move In," Kim said.

"Sweet," Seth said, carrying more boxes. "I knew you wouldn't have us doing labor for free."

As a plea for independence and a little bit of space, Kim's parents had helped her buy a cheap condo for her birthday last month, in December. They hadn't wanted her to move out, but she had deemed it as a necessity if she were to grow up. The most responsibility she'd had in the decision was where the home would be, and she had decided to go the cheapest, most convenient route. Now she had a little place in a complex named Shady Pointe Condominiums, just on the outskirts of Forks. It wasn't too far from her parents' big house in the sticks, but it was far enough that they wouldn't make any surprise visits.

Life was moving forward for Kim. Finally. As she continued to go to school and work at the gym (as she was now being moved up to a personal trainer), she realized she was grown. Her life was getting in order. And it was a small life, but it was hers. She hoped her home would be the major thing her parents bought for her. The new year was looking pretty decent.

The extraneous part, though, would be moving in. She hated the meticulousness of packing and unpacking. She just liked things to be done before her since she was used to it. But at least she had three handy guys and a girl with a good eye to help her out.

The boys—Quil, Embry, and Seth—brought the last of the boxes from Kim's parents' house and loaded them into Quil's sketchy truck.

"Is that it?" Kim asked Embry.

"Everything that's packed and says it's yours," he replied.

"Thanks. So I'll meet you at the new place," she told the guys. "You can follow me and Em if you forgot where it is."

"You got it, boss," said Seth. He, Quil, and Embry hopped in the truck, and then Kim and Emily got into the former girl's car.

"I'm surprised Sam didn't show," Kim said as she began to drive to her condo. "Where's he at?"

"I don't know," Emily said. "Out."

"I thought you guys were working things out."

"I thought we were, too, but he seems to only stay mad. That's all he's good for, anyway. It's like I'm being cheated on and I'm second place to his anger."

Kim didn't know what to say to her. Emily didn't have the parents or the monetary luck that she had. She couldn't just drop a bunch of money on a new home and leave. That was the only advice she had to give and it wasn't even applicable. Her own privilege just smacked her in the face and it burned like hell.

Shady Pointe Condominiums, while in an albeit decent location, really lived up to its name and price. The place was as sketchy as a dingy little town like Forks could get. It was the face of the badlands postcard. Wish you weren't here.

Kim pulled her car up to her designated parking spot in front of her building, remembering her home was on the fourth of five stories. It was a good thing she was about to become a personal trainer. She'd need the exercise.

The boys pulled into the spot next to her. "Which floor?" Quil asked after he rolled down his window.

"Fourth floor."

A collective groan came from the truck.

"Y'all are so lazy," Emily said to the boys, getting out of Kim's car. "Bambi needs to move into her new place, and it's not like you're doing it for free."

Kim nodded and grabbed a box from the truck. "So get a move on," she added.

It turned out, the transportation of all the boxes from downstairs to upstairs wasn't even the hardest part. That was left to figuring out where all the boxes went. She only had a kitchen, a living room, a bathroom, and a bedroom. Even though Kim had labeled all the boxes, her handwriting had turned illegible, and all the while, she tried to deep clean the bathroom and kitchen as well as change the locks the entire time. Moving in sounded a lot easier on the internet.

By the end of the day, all of the boxes had gotten into the correct room, and she had gotten her bed, couch, and kitchen table set up. She considered the day a success.

After the boys went home after being paid in free pizza, Kim and Emily finished the leftovers as the day wound down.

"Thanks for helping out," Kim said.

"No problem. I just kind of wish Leah showed up at least once during the day."

Kim shrugged. "I guess she still hates me."

"It doesn't bother you?"

"Yeah," Kim admitted. "When Leah's upset, everybody has to feel it. But at least she's not my cousin. I don't have to go to her wedding."

Emily chuckled. "Yeah. Are you still mad at her?"

"Me? No. I'm over it."

She just wished she could talk to Leah, though. See how she was doing and whatnot. Kim felt like they'd broken up and they hadn't even been together. Kim liked change and all that, but shit just wasn't the same and it was partially her fault, she was willing to admit.

They definitely had pride issues.

Why hadn't Kim detected them earlier?

Within a few days, most of Kim's belongings had found their place, but she realized that she didn't even know her neighbors yet. She'd read on the internet that it was best to get familiar with them in the case of an emergency or something. So after a run one morning, Kim decided to very, very casually say hi to her immediate next door neighbors just to break the existing ice.

Wiping away the cold sweat from her forehead, Kim rang the doorbell.

It was a good thing her heart was already pounding.

The person who opened the door was the single hottest woman Kim had ever seen in her life. She was hotter than Rihanna, hotter than J-Lo when she had played Selena, hotter than God if God was a woman (which Kim thought she had to be). This woman just might be God herself.

The woman had olive skin and long, wavy black hair down to her waist. She was clad in the most expensive, lacy, black bra and panty set that Kim had laid eyes on, and over it, covering one of her breasts, was a satin turquoise robe with a subtle flower print. Her body was incredible, too, with flawless curves and every inch of skin silky smooth—Kim tried to look away, she really did. She brought her gaze upwards and the woman's eyes, a strange golden brown, met hers with an intrigued look. Her pink lips were in a sultry pout, and then one of the corners turned up in a slight smile.

And then another woman appeared behind her. She was just as gorgeous. Actual model material. She wore a similar ensemble to Carmen's, except her lingerie was soft pink and her robe was silver with a white flower print. And she had curly strawberry blonde hair down to her waist. She was paler, but she had the same overall look as the brunette. Her eyes, also golden brown, were interested (Kim didn't know why), and her mouth was in a playful smile.

She tucked a lock of the brunette's hair behind her ear. She kept her eyes on Kim when she purred in a slight Russian accent, "Carmen, come back to bed."

Kim's mouth opened and closed like a goldfish's. "Um—I—sorry," she stammered. "I think I should—"

"No, come in, come in," Carmen insisted, her voice in a soft Spanish accent. She started to close up her robe. "We don't think we've met you before."

Carmen gently tugged on Kim's wrist (God, why are her hands so soft) and led her into the condo. It was huge on the inside, and adorned with Japanese art. Light in its cream, woodsy color scheme, Kim immediately felt relaxed. Then she felt like Odysseus, trapped by the sirens' song.

"Come, sit," Carmen said, and Kim obeyed, sitting down on the leather cream couch. The strawberry blonde retreated to the kitchen.

"Tea?" the blonde asked.

"Um, uh—yeah," Kim said.

"I'm Carmen," the brunette said, sitting down on the opposite couch. Then she nodded her head over to the kitchen. "That's Tanya."

"I'm Kim." Her eyes glanced around the room. "How long have you guys lived here?" she wondered.

"About three years now, but we're frequently in and out. We like to travel. I guess you could say our trip to Japan last month had a bit of an influence." She smiled, clearly proud of her home.

Kim's heart exploded, and then she smiled back. "So what are you guys to each other?" she asked. "I mean—"

Then Tanya approached the living room with a tray of tea cups. She handed one to Kim. "Thank you," Kim said. Then she looked at Carmen. "I'm sorry if that came off weird or anything."

Tanya laughed, and the noise resembled that of a flute. It was the most charming laugh on the planet. "Oh, it's fine," she said, sitting down next to Carmen after she set the tray down on the low, wooden table in the middle of the room.

She rubbed her fingers along the back of Carmen's hand as she took a sip of her tea. "We get that a lot."

"Tanya and I are just friends," Carmen said.

"What's the term they use these days?" Tanya asked. "Gal pals?"

Kim tried not to be surprised—she really did—but then Carmen giggled. It was, of course, charming.

"I'm just kidding," she said. "We're together. Engaged, actually."

"Oh, that's so sweet," Kim said, somewhat relieved to know there were other lesbians (Am I a lesbian? Or am I bi? Shit) around. It made her feel less like an alien. "How long have you two been together?"

Carmen looked to Tanya. "Six years in March, I think?" she asked.

Tanya nodded. "We've been engaged for six months, though."

"That is so sweet," Kim repeated without noticing her repetition.

Tanya giggled. "Are you also gay?" she asked, not at all shameful in her own question.

What? Kim thought. Can she, like, smell it on me or something?

"I—um, I don't think I know," Kim admitted. "I might be. I think I'm just bi."

Tanya raised a blonde eyebrow. "Interesting."

Kim didn't know how to take that. So she just set her tea cup down and stood up. "I'll see you guys around," she said politely. "Hopefully not right after I've gone on a run."

Carmen and Tanya rose to walk her out.

"Let us know if you need anything at all," Carmen said.

"And maybe we could have dinner sometime soon," Tanya added.

"Thank you," Kim said to the both of them. "That sounds great."

Then she left their condo. When she arrived at hers, just a few steps away, she could hardly go in. She could only lean against the door and try to calm her heart.

What the hell just happened?

Emily came home from work one night in February to a surprisingly occupied house. She worked at a record store now, and the job itself had managed to make her a little obsessed with organization. The second she entered the house and turned on the lights, she lined up all the shoes against the wall next to the front door. Then she carefully removed her coat and folded it, placing it against the back of a chair in the kitchen. Her eyesight didn't even graze the living room.

"Much better," she mumbled.

"I didn't know you talked to yourself," Sam said.

"Wow, creeper much?" Emily asked. "Scaring the shit out of me in my own house like that."

She made her way to the living room and lounged on the couch next to him, wrapping her arms around him like a comfort blanket. Except it didn't stop him from stiffening up. He was just like that (or that was just what she liked to tell herself).

"How was your day?" she crooned, her voice private.

"Fine," he said. His voice was short. "Yours?"

"More hipster bullshit, you know," she replied. "The works."

"Can't stand 'em."

"Me neither."

There was a moment of silence, but Emily knew Sam's head was empty.

"So I was thinking," she said, "since our birthdays are less than a month apart, we should just celebrate together, during yours."

Her birthday was February 13th, and his March 8th. They were going to be twenty-one so soon and she refused to believe it. Besides the fact that she'd been drinking forever, she and Sam had actually made it to twenty-one years old. Almost. Through two pregnancies and two miscarriages and two thousand blowups since the age of fourteen, they'd been through it all. Loving Sam was the longest thing she'd done besides exist.

And it was like he didn't even know. He thought of them as two separate entities rather than one unit.

"I don't think I wanna celebrate at all, Em," he said. "I've got a lot going on right now."

"What do you have going on that I don't?" she asked.

"Just… just… a lot, okay?" He shrugged out of her arms. "I don't think going out and getting wasted is gonna be the answer. You know what I mean?"

She couldn't lie. "I don't."

"Sorry 'bout it."

So Emily had been wrong. She wasn't second place to Sam's anger at all—she was second place to his pride. She was second place to his piety, his God complex. She was second place to himself.

The fucking nerve.

A/N: So that was chapter 50. We have about 30-something left, and I'm so excited. Thank you to all that have been here from the start, and even those who haven't. Every reader is important.

Every review is also important, so let me know how you feel. Thoughts on Kim? Tanya and Carmen (a nice little addition I added at the very last minute, but they will have an influence on Kim, I swear)? Sam and Emily? Anything else? Let me know.

Up next: Leah and a new love interest. Any guesses as to who it is? I'm curious.

Love all around,

HS