A/N: Sorry for the delayed update. Life has been busy but I'm back. Hope you enjoy and if you do, drop a review and let me know! :D Love to all *mwah* xo
Chapter 7
Emma found herself once again standing on the front door step of Regina's manor. With a bit more confidence and bravado than last time, she reached up and knocked on the door then stepped back adjusting the overnight bag that was hanging from her shoulder. She had had to convince Mary Margaret over and over before she left that she was fine and just needed some space away from people while she sorted everything out and got her magic under control. As far as Emma was concerned, the woman didn't need to know her magic was just fine, sort of; it was the perfect excuse while she did truly try and sort things out… with Regina. When the front door finally opened, she perked up expecting to find the brunette woman on the other side but found her son beaming back at her instead.
"Mom!" The boy exclaimed as he opened the door a little wider, stepping out of the way to let her come in.
"Hey kiddo." Emma smiled as she walked inside, stopping a moment to give him a hug. Seeing movement from the corner of her eye, she looked over to see Regina wiping her hands on the apron she was wearing as she sauntered in from the kitchen. All the bravado the blonde had been feeling a moment before had evaporated as she felt her heart begin to race. How does she always get to me like this? "Uh...Hi." She stated softly with a hint of a smile as she stepped back from their son to turn her attention to the brunette.
Regina took in the demeanor of the other woman and couldn't help but be reminded of the first time they met, when the blonde had that same shy awkwardness. "Hello, Emma. I see you know how to be on time, at least when it comes to food." Regina teased and gave the woman a faint smirk. "Henry, why don't you take Emma's bag and put it in the guest room." She suggested while never taking her eyes off the other woman.
The boy looked to Regina and then to his blonde mother. "You're staying with us again?" He questioned in surprise as he reached for the bag.
Emma finally pulled her gaze away from the brunette and turned to their son. "Uh, yeah. I guess so. She insisted." She answered with a shrug, feigning innocence.
"I most certainly did not." Regina interjected, folding her arms in front of her.
Emma gave Henry a conspiring wink before turning to focus on the other woman. "Actually, I'm pretty sure that was desperation I heard when you left the station today." She gave her a playful smile, folding her own arms in mocking fashion.
Regina narrowed her eyes at her as she dropped her own arms to her side. "I said you could stay if you'd like. I honestly don't really care what you do." She scoffed and threw her one hand in the air in dismissal as she turned to head back into the kitchen, fussing with her apron on the way.
Henry rolled his eyes as he placed his hand on Emma's shoulder causing her to break her gaze on the departing woman. "She totally cares what you do." He said low and patted her shoulder before taking off to jog up the stairs and put Emma's bag away. The blonde watched the boy until he disappeared around the corner upon reaching the top of the stairs, she then sighed and made her way into the kitchen after Regina.
As she entered the kitchen, she saw the brunette standing at the counter with her back toward her. Musing to herself, and having a bit more confidence again, she walked over and pressed up against Regina's back as she wrapped her arms around the woman's waist; she fit perfectly in her arms and Emma relished it as she nuzzled into the dark, silky locks.
Regina tensed when she felt the blonde's arms snake around her. "Miss Swan, what do you think you're doing?" She asked shakily as she stopped chopping the vegetables in front of her and set the knife down on the counter.
Emma rested her chin on the woman's shoulder and held her a little tighter. "I thought it was kind of obvious." She stated, turning her head slightly to kiss the brunette's cheek.
Regaining her composure, Regina cleared her throat as she quickly picked up the knife again and began cutting the vegetables. "Henry will be back down in a moment."
"Soooo?" Emma drew out, not getting the point in the woman's obvious statement.
Regina reached down to grab one of the blonde's hands to pull free of Emma's embrace. "So, I'm trying to finish making dinner. Perhaps you could make yourself useful and set the table."
The blonde sighed and brought her hand up, running it down over her face in slight frustration as she stepped back to lean against the island, one foot crossing over the other casually. "So is this how it is going to be?" She wasn't willing to let the woman get away with her usual standoffish nature where emotions are concerned. The brunette was stubborn, but so was she and she was calling her out.
Regina set the knife down once more and turned around. "How what is going to be?" She asked with an arch of her brow.
Emma rolled her eyes as she shook her head, a light huff of laughter escaping. "I know you're not that oblivious to your own whiplash moods. One minute you're clearly inviting me to stay. Don't you dare deny it. The next minute you act as if you don't even care if I'm here? Really, Regina?" She cocked her head to the side, giving the other woman a knowing look.
The brunette studied her a moment before sighing and lowering her eyes to look at her own hands folded in front of her, her guard falling away as well. Emma always saw through her. "Of course I care." She stated quietly. "I just…"
Emma's lip turned up into a soft smile. "I know." She pushed off the island and came to stand in front of Regina, taking her hands in hers. The other woman's gaze rose to find hazel eyes looking back at her lovingly. "Your charming snark is one of the things I fell in love with, strange as that may be." She tugged on Regina's hands, pulling her towards her into a kiss.
"Please don't use that word 'charming' to describe anything about me." Regina confessed against Emma's lips, causing the blonde to chuckle. Wrapping her arms around her, Regina pulled the blonde into another kiss. But hearing Henry coming back down the stairs they soon parted, Regina turning back to the counter to finish cutting up the tomatoes as Emma wiped her lip with her finger to erase any evidence.
"Would you care for some more wine?" Regina asked while walking over with the bottle in hand.
"Um, yeah sure. Thanks" The blonde answered as Regina began to pour, filling the glass before turning to top off her own. They had moved into the study shortly after dinner, while Henry had excused himself to his room to work on his homework, which he didn't have but wanted to give his moms alone time to hopefully work things out.
Emma picked her glass up and settled back into the corner of the couch, taking a sip of the delicate wine. The brunette took up her own before joining her, placing one leg under herself as she sat down sideways upon the couch to face the other woman. Regina savored her wine as she kept her eyes trained on the blonde. Emma in turn stared back a moment or two before finding the intensity of the woman's gaze too much and looked down at her wine glass, fidgeting with it before whirling the glass around to swirl the liquid inside it.
Regina continued to study the blonde, taking in her faint apprehension that was beginning to show itself. She cautiously reached out with her free hand and moved a wisp of hair behind Emma's ear causing the woman to shift her gaze up to her. "How is your magic?" Regina inquired in a soft tone as she brushed the pad of her thumb over the side of the woman's cheek, afraid any loud noise or quick movement would frighten the blonde away.
Emma closed her eyes at the touch and sighed contently, letting the tension she didn't know was there release from her body. "It's fine. No more outbursts since yesterday." When she no longer felt the brunette's touch she slowly opened her eyes and looked to her, falling into silence once more.
After what seemed like ages of quiet stillness, Emma couldn't take it anymore and downed the rest of her wine before speaking. "Why is this so awkward?"
Regina quirked her brow at the question and thought as she cocked her head to the side. "Perhaps because we're not fighting, as we so often do." The answer brought about a light chuckle from the blonde which made Regina smile softly in turn. "Besides, emotions tend to always make things more… complicated."
"Which neither of us tend to be very good at showing." Emma mumbled as she looked back down at her now empty glass.
The brunette set her own glass down as an idea came upon her, then reached and took Emma's in kind, placing it next to hers. "Give me your hand." She commanded, holding her own out. The blonde scrunched her brow in puzzlement, wondering what the other woman had in mind, but she didn't question her out loud as she placed her hand in hers.
"Now, close your eyes." Regina continued, turning Emma's hand so that the palm was facing up. The blonde quirked her brow at the brunette before deciding to do as she was told and closed her eyes, Regina doing the same. "Concentrate."
"I can't exactly do that with you touching me." The blonde commented, feeling the tingle on the back of her hand where it lay within the other woman's.
Regina opened one eye to look at her. "I'm only holding your hand."
"Still touching me." Emma almost whispered with a shrug and slight twitch of her lip.
The brunette rolled her eyes before closing them again. "Shut up and concentrate, please."
"Well since you said please." Emma smirked before clearing her throat and shifting to settle in, keeping her eyes closed as she tried to truly concentrate.
"Feel your magic flow within." Regina offered, trailing her fingers over the blonde's palm in a feather-light touch, pulling her own magic to the surface in order to help.
"That's not exactly what I'm feeling." Emma murmured as she felt her cheeks heating up and squirmed a little from other sensations from her body.
Regina abruptly dropped the blonde's hand and opened her eyes to glare at the other woman. With the loss of the touch Emma quickly opened her own to find an angry brunette staring back at her. "Can you not take things seriously?!"
Emma was taken aback for a moment at the woman's reaction then took a deep breath to calm her own self. "I can. I just… I told you I can't concentrate when you touch me." She held the older woman's gaze but continued to feel the heat rise in her cheeks.
Regina rolled her eyes. "Just hold your hand out. I won't touch you this time." The blonde licked her dry lips then cautiously held out her hand, closing her eyes once more. Regina waited a moment before trying again. "Your magic is attached to your emotions. The more heightened your emotions are, the more likely your magic is to flare, causing you to have those outbursts unless you have control over it."
"Maybe you should touch me then." Emma whispered to herself while trying to hid her slight grin.
The blonde apparently didn't say it quiet enough however as Regina growled when she spoke. "Would you behave?"
Feeling like a child being reprimanded, Emma feigned a cough to control the giggle wanting to bubble up to the surface. "Sorry." She straightened her shoulders and took a shaky breath.
"I'm sure you are." Regina commented back, a hint of amusement filtering through with that. "Now, think of something that makes you extremely angry. Perhaps whatever was said to you to make it happen the first time?" She finished and waited for the blonde, to see if there were any sign of a flare up, but there wasn't even a taste of magic within the air. "Are you even trying?" That question just earned a scowl from the blonde. "Fine. What about Robin… kissing me."
At that thought, things around the room began to shake until the empty wine glass on the table shattered, spraying the floor with tiny shards. Emma's eyes flew open at the noise and looked over to it with wide eyes before turning her attention back to the other woman. "Shit. Sorry."
Regina gave a casual glance to the mess. "Well seems we found your trigger, at the cost of my glassware." Her lip twitched in a smirk. She then reached out and took the blonde's hand again and without being asked Emma closed her eyes and fell into the calming feeling of Regina's hand as the brunette's fingers drew a faint trail across her palm. "Now, I want you to think about it again."
Emma knitted her brow together and squeezed her eyes shut tighter. Why? "I don't want to."
"You wanted to make sure you had your magic under control, did you not?" The brunette questioned and received an irritated huff in return. Realizing she was going to have to push a little harder, Regina leaned forward and whispered against the blonde's ear. "You know, his hands were all over me." She instantly felt Emma's hand tense in her own at that admission and things began to shake around them once more. Regina gently placed her free hand back over Emma's and caressed it over and over. "That's it. Try to focus that energy now. You are the one in control, not it." She repeated several times until the tremors around the room gradually began to calm down to eventual stillness.
"That was mean, Regina." Emma stated as she looked to the other woman with a touch of hurt lurking in her eyes.
"It worked didn't it?" The woman retorted back and arched her brow in challenge to her truth. "I could always drop you off a bridge again, if you'd prefer."
"Why don't you teach me how to make one of those fireballs, so I can throw it at you." The blonde sparred back, narrowing her eyes but that only made Regina chuckle. Emma huffed and folded her arms, turning her head away.
Regina smirked as she watched the stubborn blonde. "Since it seems that our magic lesson is over for the evening, I would offer you more wine but you apparently didn't want anymore." She looked to the state of the shattered glass.
Emma's brow flicked up at the accusation as she turned to look at the mess she had briefly forgotten about. Part of her wanted to apologize again, but her headstrong nature refused and wished to annoy the brunette instead for payback. "Who says I need a glass? I'll just take the bottle." She stated with a shrug and went to reach for it but Regina snatched it away before she could.
"You most certainly will not. I swear you have no manners what-so-ever." It was so easy to fall back into their snapping nature.
Refusing to let the brunette get her way, Emma immediately drew a plan within her mind and slowly began to lean into the other woman's personal space, her eyes darting down to the woman's lips catching Regina off guard at the sudden change in tactic. Smirking Emma leaned the rest of the way in and captured the woman's lips in a kiss. A soft moan came from the brunette as she gave in and kissed back.
With Regina preoccupied with her lips, Emma reached out and caressed the back of the brunette's hand before easing the bottle from it. Once the bottle was secured in her grasp, Emma slowly pulled back from the kiss and with a flick of her brow and a grin, she brought it up to her lips and took a long swig from it.
Regina's eyes fluttered open just in time to see her bring the bottle back down, Emma's tongue flicking out to catch the stray drop of wine at the corner of her mouth. "Now who's playing mean?" The brunette glared. "And so much for that bottle." She added, refusing to lose the battle and let the other woman know she'd gotten to her.
"There wasn't that much left anyway." Emma held up the almost empty bottle and swirled the remaining contents.
"Clearly you hung out with that pirate of yours far too long." Regina commented and tried one last time to snatch the bottle from the other woman.
"He's not my pirate. All I wanted was you!" Emma snapped. But the moment the words left the her lips she froze, her eyes going wide at her own admission. Damn wine, just lost the upper hand. She stared at the bottle before bringing it to her lips and taking a generous swig, trying desperately to hide behind it.
"Would you kindly stop that?" Regina asked, a touch of softness in her tone. While she was still annoyed at the adolescent behavior the younger woman was beginning to show, the blonde's words bore through her and if she was honest with herself, it scared her. She clearly knew Emma's feelings towards her, that wasn't it. She had been so caught up in the bantering they so easily fell into that the true words were like a punch to her stomach, bringing her back to the emotional cliff they had veered from earlier.
Emma knew it was too late to save herself, the wine was taking hold of her and her filter had been left far behind. "You clearly think the wine is soiled since I drank from the bottle. I'd rather not waste it. Didn't have a problem with my lips when they were kissing you." She downed the rest before setting the bottle on the table with a tad more force than necessary, the wine all of a sudden tasting bitter as it washed her words away. Why was she even mad? Her brain was fuzzy as she gave a light shake of her head.
Regina felt the sting and the immediate creeping of the familiar walls wishing to build around her heart. She gave a short huff as she got up, taking the bottle and the glass that remained intact with her to the kitchen. "Don't get up, I don't want you cutting your foot. I'd rather not have blood to clean from my floors."
The blonde let out a strained laugh. "Of course, worried more over your precious carpet getting messed up than me getting hurt."
Regina halted in the doorway at those words. Her jaw clenched as her eyes threatened to water before looking over her shoulder at the blonde. "I do hope that is not what you truly think." Their eyes met and Emma saw the remorse in the brunette's eyes before they lowered and she turned away to continue into the kitchen. It was like a stab to the heart as Emma lowered her own gaze and picked at an invisible piece of lint on her pants. I caused her that pain.
When the brunette returned a few moments later Emma was sitting there wiping her hands on her jeans trying to get her nerves under control, hoping to apologise and make everything okay again. "Regina, I…"
"It's getting late, we should get some sleep." Regina stated, cutting the other woman off as she made quick with cleaning up the shattered glass upon the floor and table.
Emma remained silent as she watched her. She knew the signs in the woman's tone all too well; she had cut herself off from emotions… and her. Way to fuck things up, Em.
"Goodnight, Miss Swan." The brunette stated as she stood up and brushed down her pants with her free hand while she held a small bag in the other with all the broken pieces. She then excused herself to throw the glass away before heading upstairs.
Emma leaned back against the couch, laying her head back while she closed her eyes. She figured it best to give Regina some space instead of going after her at that point or things would most likely only get worse between them. After a few minutes of contemplation, she gave a sigh and pushed herself up off the couch to make her own way upstairs. This is not the way tonight was supposed to go.
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Emma sat at the end of the bed, the still darkness enveloping around her as though it wished to smother her with it's deafening silence. "Way to stick your foot in your mouth." She grumbled to herself before falling back on the bed, staring up at the nothingness. Hit the wrong button with Regina and she shuts down and her walls rise once more; Emma knew that. Sighing, she pulled herself from the bed and went over to turn on the light to find her bag so she could at least change, even if her brain wouldn't shut off to sleep.
When she flicked the light switch, illuminating the room, her eyes searched over and around but no bag was in sight. Furrowing her brow she walked over to the closet and opened it. Perhaps he stored it… nope. She almost thought of just stripping down and going to bed, forgetting it till morning, but she wanted her iPod or she would lose her mind from the overly quiet room. She contemplated while standing in the middle of the room with her hands on her hips before huffing out a breath when she realized where she would have to venture to and turned on her heels to head to the brunette's room.
Giving a light knock to the door to signal her presence, Emma gingerly opened the door and peeked her head inside. "Regina? Look, I know you don't want to be bothered but have you seen my bag? I thought Hen...ry…" She trailed off when her eyes fell upon the bag in question, sitting on the bed.
"It would seem our son had other plans on our sleeping arrangements." Regina commented, standing next to the bed with her arms folded and brow quirked at the blonde. Emma pushed the door open a little more as she came to stand there awkwardly, not knowing what to say or do and decided to shove her hands in her back pockets. Regina took in the other woman's demeanor and part of her wanted nothing more than to go to her and pull her into her arms and kiss her, but instead she scoffed and rolled her eyes as she turned around, focusing her attentions on preparing her bed for sleep.
"Regina…" The blonde started, almost in a whine. She was really hating the cold shoulder she was getting from the other woman, even if she kind of deserved it. Though honestly, the brunette needed to apologize too for what she did but Emma knew that wouldn't be happening. "Regina, I'm sorry about…"
"You may sleep here if you wish." Regina stated flatly, cutting the blonde off as she moved to slid into bed.
Emma watched with furrowed brow until the brunette was settled in before finally moving herself, grabbing her bag from the bed and beginning to change. Well that wasn't what I was expecting.
"What do you think you're doing?" Regina inquired, giving the woman a once over.
Huh? Emma stopped dead in her tracks and looked over at the woman in confusion. "I thought we were… you just said..." She motioned to the bed.
"You are not getting into this bed until you wash that filthy pirate off of you." The brunette folded her arms.
Emma gritted her teeth and clenched her jaw a moment to stop the few choice words wishing to spout forth. She was really trying to be the bigger person here but it was becoming very difficult. "Really, Regina?" She managed to get out before promptly shutting her trap, not trusting herself with anymore than that as she zipped her jeans back up. While the slight effect of the alcohol from earlier was beginning to wear off, her head was still swimming a little which meant her word filter was still less than stable.
"Do I look like I'm joking, Miss Swan?" With that the brunette pointed her finger toward the bathroom. "It's either that or you can go back to the guestroom to sleep." Emma almost growled as she snatched her bag with a glare at the woman and walked out of the room.
Regina watched the doorway closely as the woman retreated before letting out a long sigh and bringing a hand to her her brow, massaging it. Why can't I just... She closed her eyes and wondered if Emma would come back or had she once again pushed someone to the point of leaving her.
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Emma stood there under the hot shower, half fuming at the woman in the other room. She knew deep down the other woman couldn't help her instability when it came to emotions due to what she had been through. She also knew it was partially her own fault for all of this. "I knew she was pushing my buttons on purpose and I still reacted. Open mouth insert foot, Emma. Ugh" She hit the base of her fist on the wall before resting her forehead against the cool surface. They were both like that, pushing each other when it became too much. Emma thought the brunette couldn't get to her, that she knew the games and could read them, but apparently that was being a bit too cocky.
Taking a few long deep breaths she moved from the wall and back under the stream of water, drowning out the world with the sound of the water as it pelted upon her, washing the threatening emotion away. She loved that stubborn brunette woman in the other room, and no matter what… she was going to fight for her. She was going to prove to her that she didn't have to constantly build up those stupid walls with her. That's what it was, wasn't it; the moment Regina felt the least bit of vulnerability or pain, she'd build a wall or slip on a mask to hide behind. While Emma was just used to running. But she wasn't going to run this time.
Feeling more calm and relaxed, her mind feeling more clear as well, Emma shut off the water and reached out for her towel to wrap around herself before stepping out of the shower. Quickly drying off, she applied some lotion before slipping into her pajamas which consisted of a pair of boxers and a tank top. Glamorous, she was not, she thought as she looked in the mirror with a shrug. She grabbed her toothbrush and paste from her bag and went through the task of brushing her teeth. Once she was finished she looked around, stuffing things in her bag that were hers, the last being the pin that had held her hair up while she'd been in the shower as she pulled it from her hair and threw it in before zipping up.
Moving from the bathroom, she stepped out into the hall and stood there darting her attention between the guest room and Regina's. Decision time, to go to the guest room and to hell with everything or, go to Regina and show her she refuses to give up on her no matter how stubborn she wished to be. Quickly making up her mind, she padded down to the brunette's room and slowly opened the door again, placing the bag right inside on the floor as she walked in. "Better?" She asked, standing for inevitable judgement.
Regina was laying there fussing with her phone when she stopped to look over at the blonde. She took in the woman's attire and fresh from shower look. "It'll do." She stated emotionless, though her insides were saying something completely different, and quickly turned her attention back to her phone to hide her heated thoughts.
Emma rolled her eyes and walked around to the empty side of the bed. "Have I mentioned how infuriating you are?" She questioned, but with no malice in tone as she slipped into bed and, without warning, nestled against the brunette woman.
Regina was caught off guard at the sudden action of the other woman and her body went rigid. "What exactly do you think you are doing, Miss Swan?" She looked down at the blonde who had her head nestled on her chest.
"I figured if I'm going to end up like this anyway, might as well start here so you can get used to it. Me being clingy and all." Emma stated with a slight yawn at the end. She dared a quick glance up at the other woman with a small smile before settling back in. She was done fighting and being angry but she still refused to let Regina win this one.
"Your incessant need to cling is irksome." Regina half mumbled, trying to sound annoyed but failing miserably as her body began to meld into the blonde's embrace, only causing Emma to cuddle that much closer.
"Too bad, you offered your bed so now you're stuck with me. And you make a good pillow." Emma commented, glowing with the fact that the brunette had not decided to push her out of bed. That was a good sign right?
"Yes, well… clearly I drank more than I should have to make proper decisions, and I don't remember offering you my bed. I believe our son was the decision maker on that which left me no choice but to be inclined to give you the option of such." Regina explained, trying to keep a straight face but was quickly being betrayed by the slightest curl of her lip.
Emma heard the amusement in the woman's tone and it made her smile grow. She found her Regina again. Wall demolished. "Mmmhmm, keep telling yourself that."
The brunette could no longer hold back the small smile that had been forming upon her lips as her resolve softened and she placed a kiss on the blonde's head. Taking her finger, she placed it under the blonde's chin and tilted her head back so she could capture her lips in a kiss. "I'm not quite accustomed to this. I'm used to ravishing people in my bed, not cuddling."
Emma looked at her sincerely. "Well, as much as I would love to do so… I think that's jumping the gun a bit. While my body may want that, my heart wants… I want our relationship to be more than that."
There was a glint of wickedness within Regina's eyes at the mention of Emma's body wanting the same as her own, but it was quickly replaced with warmth and love as she brushed her thumb along the other woman's cheek. "As do I." She bent her head down to claim the woman's lips again.
The kiss lasted longer than the first, soft and tender but full of so much hope. When they finally released, Emma just stared into the brunette's chocolate, satin eyes. She didn't think she would ever tire of gazing into the depths of them, into the soul of the woman she… "Regina, I…" She wanted to confess her love but feared scaring the other woman off and instead went mute.
"You what?"
Emma searched Regina's eyes, wondering if she could bring herself to say the three little words that were in her heart. But she didn't want to take the chance and ruin the contentment they had managed to find after what had happened that evening. While they were three simple words, they held much power and it scared her. So instead she merely sighed and rested her head back on the woman's chest. "Nothing."
Regina had a feeling she knew what the blonde wanted to say and though part of her was scared of such a confession, another part of her wished she had said it. Perhaps it would have given her the ability to confess as much herself. She was quiet a moment, in case the other woman changed her mind, before she softly spoke. "I 'nothing' you too." Emma looked up through her lashes to the other woman in that moment, realizing what had just been confessed. The words were safer, but both women knew the impact they had just implied. "Goodnight, Emma." Regina gave her a faint smile and a kiss to her forehead.
Emma returned the smile with a small one of her own before nuzzling into the other woman's neck feeling safe and loved back. "Goodnight, Regina." With that, the brunette adjusted slightly to rest her head against Emma's as her arms wrapped around the blonde, holding her to her as they fell asleep.