"What's wrong with you?" Izzy asked me as we waited for our choir teacher to get to class.
"Nothing." I snapped at her. "Where is this teacher?" I asked.
"She's always late." Stella answered.
I let out a loud sigh. I just wanted this day to be over.
"Now don't hurt me for asking, but what's wrong?" Allen asked holding up his hands in front of him in surrender.
"Lydia just said something in gym class that pissed me off." I told the three of them.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Izzy asked me.
"Not at all." I told her. "Finally." I said as I saw a the teacher run into class.
I took a second to look at her. Her hair was messy, her clothes not quite fitting her. Her glasses sat crooked on her face and she had her hands filled with what looked like sheet music. I could not help but laugh at her.
"What's so funny?" Stella asked.
"She looks like that teacher from Harry Potter. The one who can see things." I told them.
"You mean that crazy lady." Allen.
"Yes." I answered.
"Oh my god she does." Stella added in.
We all started laughing but quickly stopped when the teacher's eyes landed on the four of us.
"Every one settle down. Settle down everyone." She repeated. "I have got the sheet music for our next concert. I will need a few volunteers to help past them out." She told the class then posed.
"First we have a new student. Thana. Thana Tomes. Where are you?" She asked.
I raised my arm so she could see where I was.
"Why don't you stand up so the class can get a look at you?" She said.
I felt instantly uncomfortable by the way she just worded that. So they could take a look at me.
I slowly stood up and took a look around. Everyone in the class was staring at her. Expecting her to say something.
"Hi, I'm Thana." She said and then quickly sat back down.
"Thana why don't you come up to the stage?" The teacher asked the second I sat back down.
"Why?" I asked completely confused.
"So you can audition." She told me with a smile.
"But I got placed her. No one told me I would have to audition." I told her.
"Don't worry hun. It's just a formality. Everyone has to sing there first class so I can figure out where to place them." She told me.
I got up and walked to the stage. I got up there and looked around at all of the faces who were staring at me. They were all waiting for me to sing. I felt like I was going to throw up my stomach. All of my confidence had left me. Never in my life have I ever sung in front of any one.
"What am I supposed to sing?" I asked.
"Anything you want." She told me.
I stood there thinking about a song I knew well enough for me to sing in front of class. I looked around the stage and saw a little boy with glasses sitting behind a black piano. I walked over to him and whispered to him.
He shook his head letting me know he knew the song. I walked back into the middle of the stage and waited for him to start playing. A few seconds later I herd the familiar sound of Christina Perris "Human". I took a deep breath and started to sing along.
I can hold my breath.
I can bit my tongue.
I can stay awake for days if that's what you want.
Be your number one.
I sung, so low I could barely hear it myself. I looked out and saw that everyone else was also struggling to hear me. So I started to sing a little louder.
I can fake a smile.
I can force a laugh.
I can dance and play the part if that's what you ask.
Give you all I am.
I looked back out at the crowed. My eyes found the three of my friends who were all watching me. My eyes steeled on Izzy who was staring at me and smiling. She gave me a quick thumbs up letting me know I was doing a good job. Giving me a little more confidence. I decided if I was going to do this I would give it my all. Even if I sucked at least I would try.
I can do it.
I can do it.
I can do it.
I sang raising my voice as each line went on.
But I'm only human and I bleed when I fall down.
I'm only human and I crash and I break down.
Your words in my head, knives in my heart.
You build me up and then I fall apart.
'cause I'm only human.
I can turn it on.
Be a good machine.
I can hold the weight of worlds if that's what you need.
Be your everything.
I can do it.
I can do it.
I'll get through it.
I posed for a second before starting to sing the next verse.
But I'm only human.
And I bleed when I fall down.
I'm only human and I crash and I break down.
Your words in my head, knives in my heart.
You build me up and then I fall apart.
'Cause I'm only human.
By the end of this verse I was practically belting out the song. My arms out next to me moving with the beat.
I'm only human.
I'm only human.
Just a little human…..
I managed to sing even loud then I just was. My arms were out above my head and by the last line they were balled and fist up near my chest. I held the last note until I felt out of breath.
I can take so much.
'Til I've had enough.
I sang in a soft voice that was almost not able to be herd. My arms went back out above my head as I again belted out the last part of the song.
'Couse I'm only human and I bleed when I fall down.
I'm only human and I crash and I break down.
Your words in my head, knives in my heart.
You build me up and then I fall apart.
'Cause I'm only human.
I held out the last note out for a second.
At this point my eyes where closed so I could not see the reactions of the people in the class room. But there was no sound only silence.
I slowly opened my eyes to see everyone staring at me.
I guess I was worse than I thought.
I was just about to walk off stage when the room was filled with the sounds of clapping. I looked around and everyone was clapping and standing up. Smiling at me. The teacher quickly scurried over to me. Once she reached me she shushed the class. I just stood there not shore what I should do.
"Everyone meet our newest lead female vocalist." She told the class.
"Wait what?" I asked.
But she just started shoving me off the class.
I took my seat back next to my friends.
"What just happened?" I asked them.
"You killed it." Stella said.
"Why did you not tell us you could sing?" Izzy asked.
"I did not know I could." I told them.
"So raw talent. Cool." Allen said.
"So new vocalist meet the other two lead vocalist." Izzy said as she and Stella smiled at me.
"You guys?" I asked.
"Yep." They said.
"Hey me to." Allen said.
I just looked at him and smiled.
"Your one of the lead female vocalist?" I asked him.
"No. You know what I mean." He said.
"Cool." I said.
I took all of this in for a minute.
"What is with me getting on teams I don't even know I'm trying out for?" I asked.
"Well I would not really call choir a team." Allen replied.
I looked at him and smiled.
"You know what I mean." I responded using the same line he just gave me.