Well, it took me a year, but I did it! I finished this chapter. I can't even begin to explain how sorry I am, but writer's block is a bitch. I have written and rewritten this chapter about five times and got half a page before I deleted it. I lost all inspiration for it and for that I apologize. But, a few days ago out of nowhere I just started typing and I just couldn't stop.
I know how I want this story to end, I am just really struggling to get there. I apologize again for this long ass wait and if anyone is still reading this, well then here is chapter eight.
Disclaimer: I own nothing obviously because there ain't no way in hell I would have written season seven like they. (I am not bitter.)
(I am a little bitter.)
(Only good thing was Nora and Mary Louise.)
(And they killed them )
Chapter 8: Find My Way Back
On my way now
Don't give up on me
And no one knows what
What tomorrow brings
These weary eyes will never rest
Until they look in yours again
I'm on my way now
I still believe
A month. That is how long it has been since she learned about Stefan—since she had talked to him. Since Rebekah came back and began to help Bonnie and the Saltzmans. Now that they all had been introduced, Bonnie had explained to them Jeremy and his want to be out too. Of course, that changed their feelings on trying to keep Kai in and Kol with him. With Jeremy and Lexi over there and a chance for them to all be reunited, they began to form a plan to kill Kai.
Caroline still didn't agree with it. Of course, it would be great for everyone that had died at the hands of something terrible to come back, but when you die that's it. You aren't supposed to come back.
Isn't there a natural order?
But isn't she technically dead and ruining that natural order?
It all confused her so much.
She was still trying to understand Rebekah's family.
After Rebekah had come back to Caroline's, Hope had given Rebekah a crash course on everything she had missed though knowing her mother tried to keep tabs on most of the things that went on. For Caroline, her eyes were being open to the world around her.
It turned out Hope is a hybrid like Klaus. Born as a werewolf because of her parents, she gained the vampirism of her father effectively becoming the first hybrid of her kind—vampire-witch-werewolf. Her magic she keeps dormant mostly. Though she uses it in life or death situations, she doesn't practice it regularly. She aged normally up until she was about twenty years old which was ten years ago before her body became frozen in time.
She was married to another hybrid, Tyler, who is Matt's best friend. Of course, when Hope met Tyler she had no idea he was the same Tyler that her dad told stories to her about growing up. They had met away at college and Tyler had said he was from up North. It wasn't until they were already dating and Hope brought him home to see her home town—Mystic Falls—did they put it together. They had bonded over both being hybrids, but never discussed how they became it. Tyler never thought she could be related to an Original. That was five years ago. At first, Matt tried his hardest for them to see how absolutely weird it was for them to be together and when he used the age card Hope scoffed and muttered her mother was over a thousand years old which was how Tyler learned he was in love with an Original's child.
(He then fainted.)
After that, Matt learned to come to terms with it. Tyler struggled to see Matt age without him and Matt had to explain that he in fact was a vampire and once he appeared to be seventy, he would revert back.
Tyler is also in his late sixties like Matt should be and apparently Elena.
They all went to high school together back in the sixties.
Hope then gave her mom a very strong pep talk before sending her off to see Matt. Though Rebekah didn't want to derail his life, Hope said it was nearly impossible for her to be in town and them not to speak.
And so Rebekah took a deep breath and left Caroline's. A day later, a twenty-five year old Matt walked in holding hands with a very pleased Rebekah. They covered it up around town by saying Matt was his own son and that sixty-eight year old Matt had gone on a very long vacation.
Of course, Rebekah was very careful knowing her brother had been in town not long before, but they hadn't heard a peep from him since his outburst on Caroline's doorstep and Elijah had assured them he was in New Orleans dealing with his own problems. So they had some wiggle room before he came huffing back.
It was awkward for Caroline and Elena for all about five minutes before they each apologized. Elena said she should have noticed Caroline was a vampire and Caroline said the same. After that, they told each other of how they turned, Elena explained how long Damon and she actually had been together and what it was like to be a teenager during the Woodstock era.
With the everyone being supernatural out in the open, it was much easier for Caroline to explain her feelings for Stefan to Elena and the day before when Elena had asked when had her feelings began to change, Caroline stuttered an I don't know.
She couldn't tell you when it happened. When his thoughts and his feelings began to mean something to her other than what different way he could make her forget about a long day. She would scoff if you said it was in between bouts of sex when he'd ask her where she was from.
She'd shake her head if you said it was during class when she'd smile at him knowing an answer before sometimes even the professor.
Learning Stefan was a vampire isn't what made her care about him—just when she realized she did.
Months of her telling herself she didn't know anything about him became falsehoods that she held on to so she wouldn't be broken. Cause she had been broken before. Her heart shattered by a boy she was sure she loved looked at her in complete terror after she had saved him from a vampire with a bad attitude.
Her heart broken by Klaus being evil and his lust for power was greater than his love for her. She saw how love tore families and broke people. It made Enzo turn his humanity off after losing Maggie, Bonnie almost go insane from the grief of losing Kol—a man who had grown on Caroline more than she'd ever admit to him. Rebekah had to stand beside her brother—who she had every reason to kill if need be—just to make sure the man she loved and her daughter stayed safe.
So why would she ever subject herself to that pain?
Because this pain—the pain of sitting so close to him and not speaking to him was just as bad. Because she sat in the library and could see him studying with that sweet girlfriend of his and she literally thought she was going to go out of her mind.
Because there are so many other things she should be worried about.
Like how quiet Mystic Falls was a lot spookier than she ever believed.
And how Bonnie was sending herself on a suicide mission to save the man she loved and two people she didn't even know.
Or what about the fact just because Klaus had made himself known doesn't mean his threat to hurt Stefan was just as real.
And don't even get her started on Kai.
So she should be worried about the supernatural wreckage being caused all around her and not about the fact to boy she loves—
Loves? No—that wasn't what she meant. Cares greatly. Wants to be around him always and seeing him smile at someone other than her was causing her to want to throw her pencil at him—isn't like it would cause any damage.
But didn't she admit she loved him weeks ago?
It was a moment of weakness. She didn't love him. This was easier if she didn't.
But still, she shouldn't be thinking these things. But she was having a bad day and no she didn't mean she just wanted to have sex with him to forget that today was her mom's birthday—but she just craved him holding her as she cried to him.
And to top it all off, she has an exam tomorrow for her marketing class that she knows she is going to fail because she has read the same damn sentence five times and yet she still finds the need to read it once more.
Or twice more because now Stefan is leaning over to whisper something to his girlfriend.
She needs to learn her name so she doesn't have to keep referring to her as Stefan's girlfriend because that just adds to her utter emotional break down and makes her forget the sentence again.
And she definitely should have picked a better table to study at instead of the one that gives her a clear view of where she wished she was.
Oh who she was kidding? She picked it on purpose because let's be honest, she hasn't been to library in months.
So when said girlfriend reaches over to grasp Stefan's hand and stroke it lovingly Caroline slams her book shut and practically vamp speeds to the bathroom.
Stefan can literally feel her eyes on him and it is taking everything in him not to run over and tell her everything was going to be okay.
"Why don't you just tell her the truth?" Nora doesn't even look up from her notebook knowing Stefan's stilled movements are coming from blonde behind him.
"Cause that would go over well. Oh yeah, I said I had a girlfriend, but I don't."
"You only did it for my sake."
"Nora, I really don't think Caroline is going to care that the only reason I said it was because you just woke up from a century long coma."
Nora had spiraled into his life only a month ago when she awoke from a coma like state. Her, along with her long-time girlfriend, both witches and vampires. What at first, Stefan was afraid would cause an issue with town, Nora wanted to get a hold on her bloodlust. Mary Louise had run off after assuming Nora wanted time away from her when in reality she just didn't want to hurt people. Nora had begun going to class with Stefan as a shadow student to help her get used to the new century and to make things easier, they decided to say they were dating.
"Or it will make perfect sense to her. I needed someone to be with me at all times to make sure I didn't kill someone with my powers and it was easier to tell people were dating then to try to saw we were cousins or something where I had to change my name. But even if she doesn't understand, it will be a lot easier for you to be around her if she doesn't think you are cheating on me." Nora explained.
Stefan leans in close, "You realize she could be listening to every word we are saying right?"
"She's not because you told me that she respects people's privacy too much to even look through a friend's purse. She definitely isn't going to listen in on our conversation. And you know that." She stated matter-of-factly.
Stefan grumbled at her.
Nora reached over to grab his hand. Stefan winced at the sound of Caroline slamming her book shut before noticing her speed past them to the bathroom. "You have been a great friend to me and I wouldn't trade you for the world. But a war is brewing and I might be new to this whole good guy thing, but I know that if it was up to me, I would want the girl I love by my side."
"I don't love her."
"Okay. The girl you like a lot." She teased though even Nora could see through his denial.
"What about the girl you love?" Stefan shot back not wanting to deal with his own issues.
"We aren't discussing me and Mary Lou. We are discussing you and Caroline." Nora glared at him.
"Well, I am just saying if you are giving me end of the world advice, maybe you should take it."
"Fine. I will think about it, but she is obviously upset Stefan, so I am breaking up with you." Nora smiled.
Stefan sighed knowing it is what he wanted, but still hesitating.
"If you don't go cheer her up, I will, and with my accent I can't promise she will still want you."
Stefan gave a slight laugh standing up. He kissed the top of Nora's head. "You're a better person than you give yourself credit."
"Thank you."
Stefan wasn't sure why he felt nervous as he walked towards the bathroom. She probably assumed he wouldn't follow her and if by some chance she did, he would find the girl's bathroom a reason for him to stop.
Something about him being a gentleman.
Of course the time they ran into each other her months ago after they had gotten into a fight didn't stop her from dragging him into the bathroom and locking the door before anyone else could get in.
He pushed the door already hearing her sniffle and he felt his chest seize. Elena had told him today was her mom's birthday. He should have been here sooner. He should have done this a month ago.
"Caroline." He said locking the door behind him—not sure why she hadn't done that when she came in.
Her sniffling stopped abruptly from behind a stall and part of wondered if she thought if she stayed quiet long enough he'd leave.
"I am not leaving."
"I am fine. Please just go." She whimpered even though all she wanted was to run into his arms.
"No."
He heard her huff and unlock the stall to come face to face with him leaning against the sink counter.
"You really don't need to be here." She whispered.
"I should have been here sooner." He shrugged wanting to step closer to her, but not wanting to make her run away again.
Caroline tried. She really did try to stay aloof and nonchalant. Act like his proximity to her didn't affect her, but with every other thought she saw flashes of her mom on her last birthday and she became more upset. "Today's my mommy's birthday."
She sounded so much like a child as she whimpered the words. She just needed a few minutes of him comforting her then she would ignore him again.
"I know." He sighed reaching for her. She stumbled into his arms as she began to cry into his chest. No longer needing to worry about hurting her with his strength, he held her as tight as she could as she cried. He was rather sure she tried so hard to keep it all together that she just needed to be upset—even for a few minutes.
"And I was doing—doing so well. It is just—I have had a really rough—rough month and she—" She cried through her words and after she sputtered the word she, the rest was gobbled up by another sob.
"She what?" He whispered knowing if she didn't talk through this she'd never get over it.
"Made it—better. Made it seem not so bad."
Her cries became deafening once again and he held her even closer. Stefan couldn't imagine a time when he didn't know Caroline. When his heart didn't break for her. It made no sense to him that he denied himself of caring for her. Why he spent months acting like he didn't know her for so long. She was addicting. Her smell, her smile and the fact she hadn't smiled in over a month made him want to hide her away from the rest of the world. Of course it made so much sense to him why she pushed him away. She had been broken so many times that the idea of him leaving shattered her. He knew about Klaus threatening him and she assumed being away from him meant Klaus would leave him alone.
He held her for only a few minutes and when her cries began to quiet she pulled away. He wanted kiss her. That was stupid, he knew that. It would only scare her and remind her of all the reasons to run away. But as she looked up at her, lip trembling and eyes red from tears, he just wanted to kiss her to make it just a little better.
And when her eyes dropped to his lips, he thought maybe she wanted it to.
Because it had been too long since he had been able to seal his lips with her own and tangle his hands in her curly hair, and with each passing day he felt his need for her grow. He knew if he just felt her lips, he'd be at peace—like coming home from a vacation and just wanting the warmth of your bed.
His hand left her waist to cup her cheek and had to resist the smile when she leaned into it and closed her eyes.
"I miss you." She whispered and he felt his heart soar, but before he could do anything about it, she was completely pulling away from him and turning away to look in the mirror.
He felt cold without her.
"I shouldn't have said that." She muttered, her voice becoming stronger with each second passing.
"Why not?" He sighed returning to leaning against the counter.
"Stefan, it is really unfair to your very nice girl—"
"She's not my girlfriend." He blurted and with that he watched her motions stop briefly and her eyes flare—any lingering traces of sadness ripped away and he was left with betrayal and anger.
"Oh really? Got another brother hiding to say she is his?" She muttered as she began to wipe away her smudged make up. She looked at him in the mirror him still facing the stall. His arms tight across his chest. She hated when he did that. It made his arms look so appealing and then she would begin to think of all the things he had done with those arms and the hands connected to them and make her think about how much she wanted to be back in them.
He looked down at her, trying to find the courage to explain. "She was never my girlfriend. She is a vampire-witch hybrid that woke up from a century long coma. She needed help controlling her bloodlust."
"And saying she was your girlfriend was needed why? It is like you fine reasons to be a complete asshole." She shook her head as she reached around him to snatch a paper towel not believing she allowed herself to feel bad about his "girlfriend".
"I was trying to protect you."
"Protect me? From what, Stefan?" Her voice had begun to rise and she walked away from him to throw her paper towel in the trash (because no breakdown would cause her to be a mess) as well as put space in between them.
He pushed off the counter and stalked towards her. "I thought you were human, Caroline. I thought if I just pushed you away enough you'd move on. I mean, aren't you doing the same thing to me?"
Caroline glared at him and at the same time cursed talking to Elena about it so freely at the boarding house. "That is completely different! Klaus wants to kill you!"
"I am big boy, Caroline. Pretty sure I can protect myself."
"Oh yes. You can definitely win against an Original." She scoffed shaking her head at his confidence. She crossed her arms tight across herself, trying to shield him as though he could see her racing heart, though he could probably hear it.
"Do you really think you not being around is going to stop him from coming after me?"
"Well, what else am I supposed to do?"
"Be with me!" He exploded.
"You know I can't." Her voice sounded so exasperated and broken.
"If Klaus is the only reason you are staying away from me, then you need to find a better one, because how does killing me make Bonnie bring Kol back?"
"He knows she will do it for me." She whispers, her anger leaving her body once again.
"Yeah and him being in love with you has nothing to do with wanting me out of the picture." He muttered.
"I don't give two shits about Klaus' feelings for me."
His anger was making him want to rip the door off its hinges and throw it.
He knew from past indiscretions with Caroline that the bathroom had thick walls and he was pretty sure was sound proof, so he didn't care how loud he was.
"And what about my feelings for you?" He roared. "What about what I want? What I need?"
"And what is that, Stefan?" Her voice matching his.
"You! God, don't you get it? If he is going to come for me, he can. I can deal with him, but that won't stop him from hurting you! I can't just keep walking around acting like your wellbeing doesn't matter to me. What am I supposed to do without you?"
"Why now? Why are you trying now, Stefan?" She asked, more like begged for his reason and before he knew it—he was yelling:
"Because I love you, okay?"
Her silence shocked him. He didn't mean to say that. He didn't even realize he felt those words—not enough to say them, but as he heard her breath hitch and her eyes widen, he realized he did.
He loved Caroline Forbes and he'd be damned if someone was going to ruin that feeling for him.
He needed to explain himself, tell her that she didn't need to say it back. That she didn't need to say anything because how could she love him? How could someone like her love him?
But he never got a chance to voice these thoughts because before he knew it, she was jumping into his arms and crashing her lips onto his.
And he was right, kissing Caroline Forbes was like coming home.
One step closer
Closer to the light
No matter where we're going
I'll be by your side
And everything we used to know
Crashed into the great unknown
One step closer
We're gonna be alright
Cause even underneath the waves
I'll be holding on to you
And even if you slip away
I'll be there to fall into the dark
To chase your heart
No distance could ever tear us apart
There's nothing that I wouldn't do
I'll find my way back to you
On my way now
Don't give up on me
And no one knows what
What tomorrow brings
These weary eyes will never rest
Until they look in yours again
I'm on my way now
I still believe
Cause even underneath the waves
I'll be holding on to you
And even if you slip away
I'll be there to fall into the dark
To chase your heart
No distance could ever tear us apart
There's nothing that I wouldn't do
I'll find my way back to you
I'll find my way back to you
I'll find my way back
Into the dark to chase your heart
No distance could ever tear us apart
There's nothing that I wouldn't do
I'll find my way back to you
There's nothing that I wouldn't do
I'll find my way back to you
I'll find my way back to you
I'll find my way back
By: Eric Arjes
a/n: So obviously when I introduced the "girlfriend" it wasn't Nora because we didn't know Nora then. But after watching season 7, I really wanted to add Nora and Mary Louise. They won't play huge parts in it and how they came to be is different. In this story, Lily isn't around. So just Mary Louise and Nora.
Also, hearing this song really gives me inspiration to write Steroline.
Okay, I will stop now.
Please review and tell me what y'all think because your opinion matters so much to me!