Once I was at the top of the stairs I came to a little white door. I thought about knocked but there was no answer. I did not have the patience to wait at this time so I pushed it open and walked inside.
Once inside I looked around and was standing in a small little hall way. There was a chair in the corner next to a shoe rack full of shoes. I figured they must not allow shoes in here so I quickly took them off pleased to finally be out of those dam heels.
I walked out of the hall and into the living room. It was actually really nice in here. Not what you would expect form an apartment on top of a tattoo parlor. There was a red long couch that sat on a nice black rug. In front of the couch was a flat screen TV that was on the wall above an brick fire place.
There was a nice glass table in the middle of the room that had what looked like a few sketch pads. I was curious to see what was inside but my attention was instantly drawn away by a figure standing on the deck that was write off the living room.
"David." I called out.
He spun around and looked at me. He was smoking a cigarette. I did not know he smoked.
"What the hell are you doing in my house?" He snapped at me.
"Relax." I told him. "Your brother told me it was okay." I snapped back at him not liking the town he was talking to me in.
Actually this was the town that he normally talks to me in. I guess I was just too drunk and high to tolerate him.
"When did you talk to my brother?" He asked getting more and more annoyed with me by the minute.
"Down stairs." I told him. Joining him out on the deck.
I held up a cigarette asking him silently if it was okay for me to light it up. He shook his head yes. I did not have a lighter so I pulled the cigarette out of his mouth. Much to his protest and used the light end of his to lite mine. Then handed it back to him. He just smiled then continued smoking.
"Look I did not come up here to fight." I told him as I exhaled the smoke from my lungs.
"Then why did you come up here?" He asked me with his devilish suggestive grin.
I smiled at him as my hand that was not holding the cigarette twitched against my leg.
"I did not come up for that either." I told him.
I knew he was kidding but I swear he looked a little disappointed when I answered him.
I shook of the thought. I could not completely trust my judgment at the moment. Considering I was in fact drunk and the coke had taken full effect.
"So?" He asked me pulling me out of my thoughts.
"So what?" I asked back. I had managed to confuse myself.
"Why did you come up here?" He asked me and laughed at the same time.
"Oh yeah. I wanted to apologies." I told him.
"For what?" He asked.
"For down stairs. If I would have known that you were an addict I would not have been such a bitch about it." I told him at lightning fast speed. Not being able to completely control how fast I was talking.
He looked at me and got angry.
"I'm not an addict!" He screamed at me as he pushed by me and walked inside.
"You know what I meant. You're in recovery. I did not know. I'm sorry." I told him honestly.
He looked back at me. Taking in what I told him.
"Do you forgive me?" I asked him.
He just smiled. "Yeah I forgive you." He told me.
"So what's up with you and Jared?" I could not help but ask.
It was a question that was rattling around in my brain all night.
"Don't want to talk about it." He answered.
"So what do you want to do?" I asked him trying my hardest not to bounce my foot violently off the ground.
"I want to dance." He said as he held out his hand toward me.
"I thought you would never ask." I told him planting my hand into his.
He dragged me along behind him as he pulled me back downstairs to the party. I did not even have time to grab my shoes. I did not care though my feet where killing me.
Once we were down stairs I could hear the music more clearly. Rihanna's "cockiness" was blaring through the speakers.
I could not help but smile as he pulled me into him so we were standing chest to chest. I was more eager than him not able to keep my body still. I started moving against him, grinding my hips against him along to the music. After a brief second of shock he started to move along with me. His hands resting on my hips trying to get me to move into him the way he wanted. I kept my hands rested on his chest so I could push away and pull into him at my own will. Keeping me in charge of the dance. He looked down at my smiling face.
"Why so happy?" He asked.
"I love this song." I told him.
"Really." He said surprised that I would like a song so raunchy.
"Really." I told him as I spun around so my ass was now grinding into him.
I did this at the exact moment Rihanna sang "I want you to be my sex slave." And as she sang the next line "Anything that I desire." I lend for ward so that my back was tilted in a way so he could have a clear view of my back side. "Be one with my feminine. Set my whole body on fire." She sang as I grinded my ass against him. Still bending forward. I could feel he hand as he gently dragged it down my back. Starting at my neck until it rested rite on the top of my ass. Helping me move with him. His other hand was still gripping my hip.
"But Imma be the queen of your body parts."
After that I lost myself in the song and in this moment. I just danced with David. Not caring that we hated each other. Not caring that we were in the middle of a room full of people. Not caring that my knew band mate Jared was probably pissed off somewhere because I was dancing with David in this way. I was too fucked up and having too much fun to care about anything. "Suck my cockiness. Lick my persuasion. Eat my words and then swallow your pride down, down."
This was how I liked to be so numb to the world that nothing mattered to me. Where I could forget all of my problems and just relax. It was not until I felt him harden behind me that I was pulled out of my head.
"Place my wants and needs over your resistance. And then you come around. You come around. You come around."
I could not help but let a smile escape my lips as I spun around so we were again facing each other. I placed my hands around his neck locking them into each other so I would not let go. He looked down at me. His eyes full of lust and desire. He placed his hands on my lower back pulling me into him.
"I can be your dominatrix. Just submit to my every order. Enter my diamond matrix. Devour my golden flower."
I continued to grind up against him intently the way I could tell he liked. I could not help the thrill I would get from being wanted by the only people who ever wanted me. Boys.
My therapist back in Boston would tell me I try to seek out the attention of the opposite sex because I like to feel wanted. She would tell me I have the unhealthy need to want to be wanted because I feel unwanted. Well no shit. I would tell her. I'm in foster care the definition of not being wanted.
She was a bitch but she was rite.
I guess I did not have to feel that way anymore. I mean I have a home now. But I could not help but wonder if I was really wanted. I mean I'm living with my father but is that because he wants me or he got stuck with me. Scott defiantly does not want me around. I mean I think Stiles wants me. And then there's always that creep Derek who's fallowing me around. Wait you're doing it again. I had to tell myself. Focusing on the attention of the guys. It was just so easy to get what I wanted from them.
I could not keep my brain from continuing to run through my thoughts at the speed of light. I mean my friends want me around and so does Malia. I guess I could have a life hear. A real life if I could just get my act strait. But then at that moment I could no longer concentrate on that because it was increasingly obvious that at this very moment the one who wants me the most is David.
I brought my attention back to David as I straightened up so his chest was touching my back as we continued to dance. I did not even know what song was on because all I could focus on was his breath on my neck as he leaned into me.
"I don't." He spoke into my ear leaving the trace of his hot breath on the side of my face.
"What don't you want?" I asked him back. Softly but I knew he could hear me.
He took a breath in. I could tell he was think about how to proceeded. If he should finish his sentence or not. I gave him a little motivation by raping my hands around his neck as I still stood with my back to him. Pulling him closer to me as I moved against him with a little more force. He let a very sexy groan escape his lips and I instantly knew I had won.
"I don't want you to talk to Jared." He told me in a supper sexy raspy, heated voice.
I instantly tensed up. I did not even notice but I completely stopped dancing.
Was he being serious? Who the fuck does he think he is? I asked myself. What we have one dance and he thinks he can tell me who I can and cannot talk to. What does he think he's going to be my boyfriend or something? I just came out to have a good time. Not to find a man. Well maybe I did want to find a man but definitely not in the way he wanted.
I pulled away from him. I started to walk away from him. I was so angry. I was scared of what I would do if I stayed. I did not make it very far because he quickly grabbed my wrist pulling me back to him so I was now facing him.
"Were are you going?" He asked.
I could hear the aggravation in his voice.
"Away from you." I snapped back at him.
"Why?" He asked like he had absolutely no idea what could have made me so angry.
"Why? Are you dense?" I snapped at him. "I don't know what the hell you thought was going to happen tonight but I just wanted to dance." I told him.
"That's bullshit." He yelled back at me taking a step closer to me. "It was more than obvious that you wanted more then to just dance." He snapped at me.
"No it was more than obvious that's what you wanted." I shot back at him.
He seemed to be angry that he could not hide the fact that I was telling the truth. Not in the way that a girl could.
"And even if more did happen." I told him. "What you think that means you have some claim to me? What did you think? That I would be your girlfriend? That I would drop all my friends, my new band to be ONLY your girl." I questioned him.
He just looked at me not shore what to say. As if he was surprised that I would not want to drop the little life I had so I could be HIS girlfriend.
"Whatever. Way to ruin the fun." I told him before pulling my wrist form his grip and making my way back to the room where I knew the rest of MY band waited.