A/N: I don't own Twilight. So here is chapter 75 of Static. I tried to have a couple of callbacks to images/motifs/other little nerdy writer things I've already written in this story, as well as other ones. I've been at this for a while, so I'm allowed. Anyway, I like this chapter more than the last one, but it's still not my favorite. I'm just happy I was able to get this out to you guys earlier. You deserve more timely updates for being loyal for 16 months and 75 chapters. I'd like to give a shoutout to J. Cole and the fact that I caught up the bandwagon 2 years late, as well as my favorite app, Vine. (By the time this story is over, Vine will probably be gone for good. I'm sad.) I'd like to give a HUGE shoutout to those who understood my recent absence from this story. Thanks for being loyal and wonderful.

Enjoy.

LXXV.

don't save her
she don't wanna be saved

Leah sat underneath the Venice Beach sun, and she felt the heat. She felt the sand, she felt the ocean, she felt it all. She felt everything.

Most importantly, she felt content. She wasn't in love with the world or in love with her life—reality wouldn't let that happen. But in a pure, sober way, she was okay with everything that was occurring around her.

She remembered that she didn't entirely hate California. She just hated some memories affiliated with it, but there was still the possibility of making positive ones. She liked the change of scenery that came with being here. She'd always thought of herself as rather gloomy. It had to be ascribed. It had to have something to do with where the planets and stars had been positioned where and when she was born. The universe had something to do with her general disposition, and she couldn't shake that. But maybe she didn't have to be that way all the time. Maybe she just needed a change. She'd been experiencing enough of them whether she wanted to or not.

Change is okay, she decided.

"Okay, this one was, like, hella good," Kim said, lowering her cell phone.

Leah sauntered over to Kim and squinted down at the screen. Kim swiped through the aesthetically pleasing photos they had just taken. So far on this trip, they had taken a lot of them. It was their second favorite mutual pastime, right after watching Selena.

"Ooh, I really need to get an Instant-gram," Leah said. "I'd get so many thirst followers just from this picture."

Kim laughed. "Instagram, granny," she corrected her. "But true—your ass looks great in this one."

"You always say my ass looks great," Leah pointed out. "You don't count."

"Shut up."

They laughed and went back to their towels, where almost everyone else was. They sat down in the soft sand, and the contentedness remained. The universe was still good.

"God," Kim said. "I still have a mild form of PTSD from this place."

"We really did that."

"Did what?"

"That."

"That?"

"That," Leah confirmed. Then they laughed. Neither of them liked to think about last summer for very long. It had been too bright. Too much.

"Oh, shit, Lee, turn it up!" Kim said excitedly.

Leah turned up the volume on the Bluetooth speaker as a mid-tempo hip-hop song played. Kim gyrated her hips as she danced on the beach, looking like a dream in her white bikini. She danced around like a ball of pure energy, like nothing hurt.

Leah took it all in, and she remembered that she didn't hate California at all. She was right where she needed to be, along with the planets and the stars. The universe was in sync.

Paul sat at a bench on the boardwalk, facing the beach. He was leaning forward with his elbows pressed into his knees. He cradled a pack of cigarettes in his hands. It was expensive—even more so here in Los Angeles.

It wasn't even expensive, he told himself. Nothing's expensive anymore. Quit thinking like you're broke.

The truth was that he hadn't smoked in a while. Bella, as adaptable as ever, had finally cracked just before they'd departed La Push.

"I still love you, but you smell and I'm tired of hearing you coughing all the time."

He thought she was incredible.

Paul had been trying to quit for a while, but Bella had been the push. That was what she did. Quitting was difficult, though—Paul didn't feel right. He'd been smoking since he'd been sent away when he was fifteen. He knew it wasn't right, but he'd done it, anyway. That was how it went with him.

He was trying so damn hard to do good and be good. He'd always been resistant to change—it wasn't in his nature to just go with the flow or whatever cheesy shit people did. He was him. He would be him to the very end, but he wanted to be a better version of him.

It was all for Bella, after all. That was his happiness. That was his everything.

He looked up and she caught his eye, even as he was super far away. Bella, clad in blue bikini bottoms and an oversized gray shirt over a bikini top, was wading in the ocean. She looked fucking radiant.

He put the pack of cigarettes down on the ground in front of him, and when he looked up, Jacob was standing next to the bench.

"I thought you quit," Jacob said.

Paul sighed. "I haven't started back up." He scooted over so Jacob could sit next next to him.

"It's been a while, bro," Jacob said, meaning it had been a while since they'd actually talked. "How've ya been?"

"I'm out here, man," Paul replied. "I guess it's going good. What about you?"

"It's good, it's good." He trailed off, and Paul remembered why he didn't talk to Jacob much—they didn't have anything in common besides the women they dated, and that was kind of messed up.

Paul's gaze fell back onto Bella, who continued to sway in the water. He wondered if he would ever get over the sight of her. He was turning into the kind of guy he'd made fun of (which would be Jacob) for being heads over heels over a girl, but back then, he just didn't get it.

"Yo, I wanna marry Bella," Paul said, thinking aloud.

Jacob just laughed. "Good fuckin' luck," he said.

Paul snapped into reality. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" he asked defensively.

"It means I know her. And I know for a damn fact that she's not the type to wife up. She's not loyal."

"That's real funny," Paul said, "'cause she's as loyal as ever to me."

"You think you're the first person to try to save her?" Jacob challenged.

Paul was trying his best to not sock this guy in the face. "Look, Jake," he explained, "she was always running off, running away from you and her piece-of-shit ex, only because you guys are boys. She found a man—me—and now she don't gotta run no more. Bella needed a man, and that man is me. That's all there is to it."

"You got it all wrong, though. Hoes don't wanna be saved."

Paul's voice was quiet. He shook his head. "She never needed saving. She saved me."

"Yeah, right. I don't know why you're treating some ho like she's God or something."

"She wasn't a ho when she was with you, though, right?" Paul asked. "Both times? And the next time you call my girl a ho, your juvenile ass is gonna end up in the hospital. But like I said, Jake, she was running around looking for a man, looking for someone to treat her right and give it to her good. I gave it to her damn good. I've been giving it to her damn good, and she's been loyal ever since. She's finally being treated right after dealing with ain't shit guys like you and her ex. I'm the best she's ever had and will ever have. I'm sorry, but that's just how it is."

"You make it sound like you weren't talking mad shit about her the last time we really talked. Did you forget or something? Last time I checked, her pussy wasn't that amazing."

Paul just shook his head. "I know you've fucked her a few times or whatever, but that don't mean a thing if you never make love. You're a boy, though, so you wouldn't know what a man knows. When you make love to a woman, especially to one as beautiful as Bella, you gotta know what you're doing, and you gotta know it's not all about you. You gotta ask her, and I mean really ask her, 'How does it feel?' When she tells you how it really, really feels, you either keep doing what you're doing or you ask her how she wants it. When you give it to he just right, you made love. Jake, I give her love. You gave her a good ten minutes. So shut the fuck up and grow the fuck up while you're at it."

"You're so fake deep," Jacob said. "You ain't shit, Paul. And, anyway, I don't see how you're calling me a kid when I'm older than you."

"By what? Three months? And yeah, I ain't shit, but I'm out here living. Damn, why you so mad now, anyway? I thought you and Leah were happy or whatever."

"We were," Jacob said. "I fucked up, though."

"Shit, Jake, you're in college, right?" Paul asked. "Why you always doing stupid shit? You can't fuck up with Leah. I mean, shit, that's Leah Clearwater."

"What the hell do you mean?"

"You don't fuck up with Leah," Paul clarified. "She's probably the most interesting girl you're gonna meet in your entire, whole-ass life and—"

"You're with Bella," Jacob reminded him.

"I said your entire, whole-ass life. This ain't about me. Jake, you gotta make shit right with her. She's a good girl. She's funny and crazy smart and will actually give a fuck about you until she doesn't. Girls like her don't come around too often. And even though you're kinda hardheaded, you can't let a girl like that go."

"Why do you still care so much about Leah?" Jacob wondered.

Paul shrugged as he kept his eyes on Bella. "I got room to care about Leah. That's family right there."

They were silent for a little while. Then Jacob leaned back against the bench. "Why do you wanna marry Bella so bad all of a sudden?" he asked. "Did you get her pregnant or something?"

Paul paused for a moment. "I mean—uh—yes."

"Shit."

"We're engaged, though, so it's all good."

"I guess. Am I the last to know?"

"You're actually the first of the group to know," Paul said. "So just keep this on the low, alright? 'Cause I don't want any drama."

"Yeah, sure," Jacob replied. "When's she due?"

"Sometime in November. She says it's gonna be a Scorpio. I still don't even know what that means, though."

Jacob just chuckled.

"What?" Paul asked.

"Leah's a Scorpio."

"Oh, fuck."

Jacob later strolled along the boardwalk by himself as he worked up the courage to talk to Leah. She was still down at the beach with Kim. They'd been spending a lot of time together—even more so than they already did. Jacob wondered if Kim was filling the void that he'd left. He wondered how she did it. Then he realized that those two probably hadn't ever had sex, whereas he and Leah had jumped into it for no real reason.

Or maybe it had nothing to do with sex. Contrary to everything and everyone that Jacob had ever been around, sex wasn't everything. Maybe Kim and Leah worked out as friends because Kim knew who she was and knew what she was about. She was strong and tough. Most importantly, she could keep up with Leah's attitude.

Jacob, on the other hand, was hopeless. He was damaged goods and he was insecure and he had a microscopic amount of self worth. He was a lost fucking cause.

Those just weren't ascribed characteristics, though. He just wished he could shake them off as fast as Leah had shaken him off.

Jacob ended up in a crowd of spectators who were clearly enthralled in the talents of a street juggler. Everybody oohed and ahhed throughout the performance, but he was silent. He could hardly pay attention.

He was suddenly nudged in his right forearm. He turned, and there was Leah. Even though he knew she was probably still mad, he couldn't help but feel better with her around. It was impossible to be mad with someone that gorgeous at his side. Yeah, the last time they had really talked, she had dragged him, but he still missed being around her. He was weak and hopeless and damaged, but she made him feel better. Paul had been right—she was probably the greatest girl he was ever gonna meet.

If only he knew how to tell her this.

They watched the juggler together, and the performance suddenly got a whole lot more interesting. The crowd had exploded into applause when Leah leaned in and asked him, loudly, "How's it going?"

He leaned right back to her and said, "It's good. My ex-girlfriend's pregnant, but at least it's not mine, right?" just as the crowd was dying down again. Everybody in a mile radius had managed to hear him, and everybody was staring.

Leah's voice was overly surprised. "What?"

They left the crowd and ended up in line at an ice cream cart.

"I mean, I can't say I'm surprised that Bella got knocked up," Leah said. "I just didn't think that Paul would wanna tell you, of all people."

"He slipped up," Jacob explained. "Like I did, just now."

"Please don't tell me I'm the last to know. I'll kill you and Kim."

"You're not. You and me are the only people who know. Just don't tell anyone. I feel like an ass for fucking up and telling you in the first place."

"Trust me," she said. "I know how to keep a secret."

"No, for real," he said semi-urgently. "You can't tell anybody. Not even Kim."

"Okaaaay," she replied, her eyes wide. "I won't tell anybody. Not even Kim."

They paid for their ice cream cones and were soon heading back to where everyone else was, over on the beach.

"I guess we both dodged a bullet," Jacob said.

"What, you didn't get anyone pregnant and I didn't end up getting pregnant?" Leah asked. "It's not too late."

"Don't jinx it," he told her.

She just smiled. "How do you like it here in LA?"

"I'm not gonna lie, I love it," he replied. "If I didn't know everything was so expensive here, I'd move."

"Shit, I know, right?" she asked. "I'll tell you what—if one of us ever wins the lottery, we'll move. No going back." Since winning seems to not be so impossible anymore…

He laughed. "You're on."

Their dialogue for the rest of the day didn't get too deep. Leah, who thrived on depth and profoundness and conversations about the alignment of the universe, feared that Jacob wouldn't be able to reach her level again. Maybe he didn't have the capacity. Maybe he realized that she just wasn't shallow enough. His simplicity usually won out, but would he ever compromise? Would he ever see her? She didn't know.

Even though Leah wasn't particularly angry with Jacob right now, they still hadn't found their closure from the bad. She could forgive—and never, ever forget—but he still refused to even apologize. They weren't getting worse, but they sure as hell weren't getting better.

She didn't feel so lucky to hold a secret with him. Bella's pregnancy wasn't even their secret to keep, and Leah just realized that her first niece or nephew wouldn't even be coming from Seth. It wouldn't even be her real niece or nephew, and she didn't want to say she couldn't see herself loving the child like family, but it didn't seem real enough. She didn't feel like the existence of her near-stepsister and ex-boyfriend's offspring had much to do with her. She just felt like she was on the outside looking in on what could have been her life. If she had given Paul one more chance, everything would be different.

Dwelling on it wasn't making her feel any better, though.

It wasn't working for Jacob, either, so he didn't dwell on it. In fact, he tried to suppress what he knew for the rest of the time they were in Los Angeles. He really did try.

Everybody was cramped in Paul and Bella's motel room for dinner that night. Over real tacos and Coronas (and water for Bella), the ten of them all laughed and shared memories. It was just like the old days—just like back when they were nine and ten, fifteen and sixteen. At twenty and twenty-one, there was no difference. Jacob forgot why he ever felt disconnected from everyone. These people were his people, and they were here to stay.

Jacob stood up in the middle of the room for an impromptu toast. "Hey, I got something to say real quick," he said, half-faded.

Everybody quieted down, and Jacob made sure he could see everyone. "I just wanted to let you guys know that I really needed this vacation."

"Don't we all," Leah said sarcastically to Kim.

"Thanks for bringing us here, Paul," Jacob continued. "It's been incredible. Now, I don't wanna come off cheesy, but here's a toast to the good life. Now, if you would all raise your beer bottles—well, except you, Bella—"

The room fell completely silent.

Shit, Jacob thought.

Leah had never seen the feeling of realization hit somebody's face so fucking quick.

Paul's face just fell into the palm of his own hand. Bella's eyes were at the ceiling, and she looked like she was holding her breath.

Seth smacked Quil in the arm. "Another Vine, Quil? Really?"

Paul just started laughing, and the general mood of the room was light again. Nobody was that surprised, after all. Then he took a swig of his beer and gave Bella's arm a rub. "It's all good," he said. "Don't worry about it, Jake. It's all good."

And after that, it really was all good. There was no use in being mad about everything or everyone. They just let it be, which was the easiest way to go.

Jacob decided that should have been figured out a long time ago.

A/N: Thanks as always,

HS